


Library of Crazy

by WhiskeyAdams



Series: America's Most Dangerous Antiques Roadshow [2]
Category: Warehouse 13
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-08
Updated: 2014-03-15
Packaged: 2018-01-11 14:29:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 117,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1174186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiskeyAdams/pseuds/WhiskeyAdams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>College AU. Part two in the America’s Most Dangerous Antiques Roadshow universe. After the events in last semester, the students reunite and must deal with the repercussions of their actions, both in personal relationships and with the Warehouse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Summer (pt1)

_“Sometimes, you have to step outside of the person you've been and remember the person you were meant to be. The person you want to be. The person you are.”_

_― H.G. Wells_

Myka never wanted to go back to Colorado. She had always avoided going home for breaks and holidays. She always used school or work as an excuse, but since she didn’t sign up for summer classes and Dr. Cho was going out of state for the next three months, Myka didn’t have an excuse when Pete told her they were going home for the summer.

Myka packed up her possessions, said a long good bye to Claudia and Steve- who were going to Steve’s parents’ home until next semester- and her and Pete flew home.

Jane Lattimer picked them up when they landed and chatted to Pete and Myka about what she had been up to, and asked the same of them. Myka was quiet. Other than to say goodbye to Steve and Claudia, she hadn’t really spoken, not even to Pete.

It was the first night after HG left that Pete had woken to the sound of Myka sobbing in her room. The next day he made plans to take her home, and she had been furious with him, but in the end, she really couldn’t stand to be in a place she had shared with HG.

When Mrs. Lattimer dropped her off in front of her parent’s book store, she adjusted her luggage and took a breath.

“I can walk in with you…” Pete offered, but Myka shook her head.

“I’ll be fine,” she insisted in the monotonous tone she had adopted, “I’ll see you later, Pete.”

The door was locked, a closed sign in the window, but Myka had kept her key. She let the familiar smell of old books calm her nerves as she walked the stairs that would lead to the apartment above the store.

It was like a punch to the gut when she walked into her old bedroom and found it had partially become some sort of extra storage space for her parents. She swallowed the pain, adding it to the stock pile she was making, and began to move the giant card board boxes around, stacking them neatly against the far wall until her desk and bed were uncovered.

She gave up and collapsed on the bed from exhaustion, though she hadn’t done much. It was an emotional exhaustion. The mattress was bare, and despite the warmer weather, she shivered before curling in on herself.

Her mother found her up there when they themselves returned from the airport a few hours later. Jeannie was a bit apprehensive to have both her daughters back in the same house for the summer, but it didn’t dampen how excited she was to see her eldest daughter.

Myka didn’t say anything as her mother woke her up with a gentle nudge, she just rolled her head into her lap and let her mom comfort her. They’d never had a close relationship, but it was something Myka needed right now, and though she did not confide in her mother, Jeannie sensed it. She apologized for the state of the room, stating that they could move the boxes to the attic, but Myka didn’t comment.

She spent a week ignoring everyone, including Pete and Tracy. She unpacked her things meticulously. Setting her pictures and books up with equal care and reverence. She lost herself in old books and writing her own story. She didn’t eat unless her father forced her to come down stairs. She didn’t leave the book store at all, and when Pete came by, she locked herself into her room.

Tracy asked him what happened to her and he didn’t know how to answer. Just because they didn’t get along as kids, didn’t mean Tracy didn’t care for her sister, and the last time she had seen Myka like this was after Sam died. It worried her.

The second week her father yelled at her, saying that this wasn’t a hotel and if she was going to be staying with them, she had to work in the bookstore, just like her sister. She took his red faced rant stoically. But she did begin working down stairs. Unpacking books, helping customers, reshelving misplaced books… it felt like high school all over again.

She passively listened to Tracy tell all the tales she had lived over the last year exploring Europe. Bragging about the people she had met, the fling she had in Paris. She put up with Tracy not doing her half the work whenever someone she knew showed up at the store to talk to her. What she couldn’t stand was when Tracy tried prying into her life.

It started innocently enough, asking about her experiences in college. Tracy had been accepted to every school she applied for, but had yet to make a decision. Myka explained that while she enjoyed the college atmosphere, the classes were difficult. Tracy rolled her eyes and begin asking more pointed questions. What kind of people had she met, was there anybody special, just how did she spend all her free time?

“So… did you meet anyone?” Tracy asked as she followed her older sister around, purposely moving books into the wrong spots so Myka would continue to walk around and fix them.

“Yeah,” Myka sighed, hadn’t she just fixed this book? “Pete and I met Steve first week of school. He’s the one we shared the apartment with.”

“You guys were just friends?” Tracy glanced up at the sound of the bell, but it was no one she cared about, so she would let Mom or Dad help them.

“Steve is gay, Trace.” Myka rolled her eyes, “So yeah, we were just friends.”

“You expect me to believe you only made one friend in the two years you were gone?” Tracy challenged, “Because even when I spent less than a day in some place I always made at least three friends and you-,”

“Let me stop you right there, Tracy.” Myka snapped, and Tracy looked at her expectantly, “Oh I have nothing to say, the sound of your voice was just getting really annoying.”

Tracy opened her mouth but was interrupted by the door opening once more. This time, she did recognize the man with the boyish smile. “Well, your boyfriend’s here.”

Myka looked up to find Pete talking to her parents. She began to quickly think of a way to get out of seeing him. She could run back up the stairs to her room… but no, Tracy moved to trap her where she was until Pete reached her.

“Hey cutie,” Tracy winked and Pete smiled in response.

“Come on,” He spoke to Myka as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and began walking her out of the store.

“Pete, I’m working!” she protested, dragging her feet.

“Your parents just gave you the rest of the day off,” he provided, “You’re coming with me.”

“And just where are we going?” she demanded.

But he didn’t reply. They walked in silence until they reached their high school. Myka was confused but Pete wouldn’t answer her questions, he just lead them to the weight training room, using a key Myka was sure he was supposed to return after they graduated. It wasn’t until he was wrapping her hands and wrists that he spoke to her again.

“You liked her.” He inferred.

“Who?” Myka asked stupidly, resisting the urge to pull her hand away.

“HG,” Pete didn’t look her in the eye, “Helena. I should have seen it, you’re my best friend and I didn’t even realize… That’s why you were so upset when I kissed her.”

“Thanks for dredging that memory back up,” Myka rolled her eyes and swallowed bile.

“It makes sense now,” Pete continued, “Why you spent so much time with her. Those moments when it was like the two of you were off in your own little world. That’s why it hurts you so much that she left. It’s like a break up, right?”

“Except we weren’t really together,” Myka shook her head, willing herself not to cry. She had been doing far too much of that lately, “She had a fiancé the whole time, so we didn’t even have a chance. So go ahead and tell me that I’m being stupid and need to get over it.”

“I’m not going to tell you to get over it,” Pete finally looked her in the eye, “I’m going to help you to get through it. That’s what best friends are for, right?” he moved her to stand in front of the punching bag in the corner.

“So what are we doing in the weight room?” Myka sniffled, trying to hide it from Pete.

“This is where I come after a bad break up,” Pete admitted, fresh sadness filling him, “I get angry, and I take it all out on this.” He gave a halfhearted punch at the bag.

The realization hit Myka over the head like a two by four, “You and Kelly broke up.”

Pete shrugged, “The day before we left, I was telling her goodbye… I freaked her out, I guess. I said I love you too soon I think.”

Myka felt like the biggest bitch ever. Her friend was dealing with a real break up, and Myka had shut him out and made him go through it alone, “I’m so sorry, Pete.”

He shrugged again, giving her a lopsided smile, “We’ll get over them, Mykes. We’ll be okay, you and me, we’re irresistible.”

Myka laughed for the first time in what felt like forever.

Pete directed her to think about everything she was upset about and put it all into her hits. An hour later and her arms were killing her, but she did feel a lot better. For once, she felt like she wasn’t about to cry. The sadness had turned to anger. And anger she could deal with.

As they walked back to the store Myka opened up more to him, “It doesn’t freak you out?” she asked, “That I liked a girl?”

Pete looked at her funny, “Why would that freak me out? It’s not like it makes you a different person. So you like chicks, I like chicks too. We have one more thing in common.”

She chuckled and punched him in the arm before growing serious once more, “It wasn’t so much that she was a girl… it was that she was who she was. Helena was… beautiful and smart and funny and…”

“Well how smart could she have been if she let you go?” Pete asked, “Maybe that makes her the dumbest person alive because you are a great catch. And one day, you’re gonna find someone that’ll make you forget all about her.”

“You make it sound so easy, Pete,” Myka shook her head, “It’s not like it’s even possible for me to forget about her. She’s in every song, every prose and every line… Helena Wells is everywhere I look.”

“Well, it may take a while, but I know you’ll be alright,” Pete insisted, “Because you are Myka Ophelia Bering, and you’re stronger than anyone I know. And the only person who doesn’t see that is you, but I’m gonna make you realize it.”

 _I doubt that,_ Myka thought to herself, but didn’t say it out loud, because she and Pete decided they were going to try and move past this.

Tracy woke her up the next day, she sat at the edge of Myka’s bed, a calculating look in her eye. “You got dumped, huh?” were her first words.

Myka huffed and fell back into her pillows, “Yes.” Was all she said.

“Well fuck him, whoever he is,” Tracy’s voice held a heat in it Myka didn’t recognize, “You and me, we are gonna make sure it was the worst mistake he ever made. Get up, we’re going out.” She ripped the blanket off of Myka.

She didn’t move at first, “I wish I was more like you, Tracy. I wish I wore red lipstick and broke people’s hearts… but instead I got my heart broken and I look bad in red lipstick.”

“Come on, Myka,” Tracy tugged on her arm so she was sitting up, “You are great, the best big sister ever, alright? And I am going to help you see that you deserve better than whatever douche broke your heart.”

Myka was shocked. Tracy had never been this way with her before. She realized Tracy was angry on her behalf. She almost told Tracy it wasn’t necessary, that Pete was helping her get over it, but part of her didn’t want to let this moment go.

Their first stop was the salon.

“First stop on the break up tour,” Tracy said when they arrived, “Every girl has to change their hair after a break up. It’s, like, girl law or something.”

Myka was hesitant, but complied. She had it trimmed, straightened and dyed a darker shade of brown that was just shy of black.

She didn’t recognize her reflection at first. But maybe that was the key. They only way she could get over Helena was to become someone else who had never been affected by her.

She let Tracy buy her a whole new wardrobe, even packed up her old clothes in a box and put it in the attic. It was things Myka never considered wearing before, lacking the proper confidence, but Myka was trying to be different. Her sister helped her learn new makeup techniques, how to walk properly in high heels, the best way to work the flat iron and curling iron.

And while Tracy helped Myka bury her old self, Pete helped her work out her emotions through physical exertion. They joined a self-defense class, went to the gym, and started running together every morning.

And no one brought up HG. And slowly, Myka began to feel better.

She went out with her sister and Pete when they asked. Hanging out with their friends, being sure to participate and make an effort. It got easier and easier. She spoke and laughed and spent less and less time in her room. Her parents noticed the difference in her and Tracy’s relationship, but didn’t comment.

One night, when Tracy and Pete had dragged her along to a hang out with their old high school friends, Myka ran into someone she never thought she’d see again.

“Myka Bering,” Kurt Smoller smiled broadly at her, “I almost didn’t recognize you! How have you been?”

Myka had had a crush on Kurt in high school, before Pete set her up with Sam. They had never been exactly close, Myka had tutored him in math and it took two weeks for him to even pronounce her name right, but he was cute and was nice to Myka, unlike many of Pete’s other teammates.

It was surprising that time seemed to only make the football player more handsome. Unfair really that he clearly had not put on the freshman fifteen, or if he had, he already worked it off and got in even better shape.

He had honest eyes, was beautifully transparent and… simple. Myka found it easy to laugh with him, talk about superficial things and forget. It was only two days before the couple was official.

“The best way to get over someone,” Tracy told her after she helped her get dressed for their first date, “Is to get under someone else.”

Myka scoffed, but couldn’t argue with her logic. Kurt was the perfect distraction simply because he was the exact opposite of Helena Wells. Conversation was kept light, he was an open book and told Myka exactly what he was thinking. He was sweet but a little shallow and wasn’t exactly going to school on an academic scholarship. Even physically, he was very _male,_ bigger and taller than Myka, so that she could wear heels and still have to look up to meet his eyes, which were a lovely shade of blue, so it was nothing like looking into… someone else’s eyes.

When they hugged it was all hard muscles and heavy scents. And Myka found it easier to get through the day without thinking about HG. She wasn’t _happy_ , but she was no longer miserable. And that was better than anything she supposed. She cried only when she was laughing too hard, she only pouted when she was trying to get her way with Kurt. She woke up in a good mood and worked hard during the day so that she would fall to sleep right away at night, because when she couldn’t… that’s when it was hard for her. That was when she could feel the ghost of another body lying next to her as it spun tails in a lilting accent.

Her photos from the last semester sat on the desk still, but she only looked at them now if she was writing, which she did less and less now. Remembering her muse was too painful, but she couldn’t scrap all the hard work she had put into it. So she just put it away, moved the picture that was taken at the beach to the back of her desk where it was blocked by happier memories.

Pete and Myka had moved up in their self-defense classes, surprisingly advanced for two who had only been working at it for two weeks. She and Tracy now spent their time laughing as they restocked shelves, even though she was still bitter about some things, it wasn’t Tracy’s fault she realized. And when she wasn’t having dinner at Pete’s house, she was going out with Kurt, who was sweet and thoughtful.

There was a week left of summer on the day she found herself working the store with Kurt, who had begun helping her during most of her shifts. They had been spending as much time together as possible since they were going to be separated soon. Not by far since Kurt went to the University of Fresno, but they would no longer be mere blocks away from each other. Myka wasn’t looking forward to losing her distraction, unsure of how she would cope with only her work out routines to get her through the day. And she _had_ gotten rather attached to Kurt. It wasn’t quite love, but given a bit more time it might turn into it.

Kurt wrapped his arms around Myka’s waist from behind lifting her and spinning, causing her to giggle madly and demand to be put down.

“Aren’t we done yet?” He whined as he set her down, but kept her pressed against him, kissing her shoulder and neck.

“Almost,” Myka spun out of his embrace, turning to give him a wicked grin, “We have to stock the new order of books, and then I am all yours.” She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him sweetly.

He lifted her again to deepen the kiss, grumbling when she pulled away too soon for his liking.

“Alright,” He sighed, setting her down once more, “I’ll go get the box, since it’s my job to provide the muscle.” He flexed for her as he walked backwards and she pretended to swoon with a giggle.

She turned back to the shelf she was reorganizing and sighed, only this time it was resigned. She usually avoided the science fiction section. Too many memories of a different book shelf with similar books haunted her here.

She froze upon seeing the book she gripped in her hand. It was the author’s name that caused her pause. _When the Sleeper Wakes_ by H.G. Wells.

She knew it wasn’t the same HG Wells that sprung to mind, but she also knew this was one particular Wells’ favorite book. And for one moment, she found herself wishing she could take this book and discuss it with the Englishwoman she was thinking of.

It had been so long since she wished for Helena’s presence. Two weeks since she thought about her in more than a vague abstract longing sort of way. It caught her off guard now, came back with a vengeance and she realized she would need more than a boyfriend and a new wardrobe to ever be fully out from underneath that woman’s spell.

There was a bell signaling a customer, and since she was the only one on the floor at the moment she called, “I’ll be with you in a minute!” before putting the book to the side and quickly shelving the other science fiction classics.

“Do my eyes deceive me, Jinksey?” A familiar voice stage whispered behind her, “Or is that our Mykes wearing high heels?”

Myka spun around and was greeted by a smiling redhead and a nervous looking blond. “Claudia! Steve!” she felt a genuine smile spread over her face as she moved to embrace them both, “Oh my god, I missed you both so much!”

“Where’s Pete?” Steve asked after he released her.

“Oh, he’s probably hanging out around town somewhere,” Myka was over whelmed with joy at seeing two of her best friends, “I’ll be meeting up with him later.”

Claudia’s hair had grown out a bit and now sported a hot pink streak through it, and she looked much healthier than when Myka had last seen her. She was obviously sleeping more and someone had made sure she ate meals regularly. Steve had stopped shaving his face so close, and now had blond stubble covering his chin, and despite the worried look on his face, he seemed more at peace than the previous years.

She was about to invite them out when a familiar scent hit her. It was faint, so faint she shouldn’t have been able to catch it, but the delicious scent wrapped around her. _Apples._ She looked behind her two friends just in time to see a raven haired beauty step out from behind the shelf.

“H… HG?”


	2. Summer (pt2)

Steve was nervous about returning home. When he left two years ago for college, he hadn’t looked back. His past was full of disappointed parents and dead sisters, why on earth would he ever return there?

Part of him wanted to blame HG for this. She started the “return home” craze that decimated their group. She left, Myka broke, Pete took her home. He couldn’t keep the apartment by himself, so he hadn’t had a choice but to fly back to Jersey.

But as is annoying companion kept reminding him, it was only a matter of time before he had to reconcile with his past. Claudia had been telling him for weeks now that he should return home and make things right with his parents. It was the only way he would be able to let go of that last bit of darkness in him and fully move on.

He was worried now how his parents would react. They weren’t exactly accepting of him when he came out as gay to them. He had Olivia as a buffer then. Now he had Claudia, but he wasn’t sure if that would make it better or worse. It made him feel better on the long car ride, though, having her there to make jokes and keep him out of his own thoughts.

Now though, he was standing on his porch, his hand hovering over the door knob. Did he just walk in? No, he hadn’t been there, it wasn’t his home anymore. He knocked instead, and waited, counting breaths. Claudia grabbed his hand to anchor him there.

An older woman opened the door, her red hair held streaks of silver, and her eyes had worried wrinkles etched around them. But as soon as her blue eyes landed on Steve, they lit up with joy.

Steve tried to hide his shock as his mother wrapped him in a warm hug, “Stevie.” She breathed.

“Hey, mom.” He hesitated only a moment longer before returning the hug. He was a little boy again for one moment, in his mother’s arms.

“Em? Who’s at the door?” a deep voice echoed off the hall walls and reached Claudia a moment before the sight of an older man. His hair was blond and thinning, but cropped short. It was Jinks in twenty years, and Claudia had to do a double take between the two.

The older man’s brow furrowed for a minute as he tried to process what he was seeing, “Steve?” his voice was gruff, and Claudia thought his eyes looked a bit misted, the bottle in his hand trembled for a minute before he set it down and buried his hands in his pockets.

“Dad.” Steve nodded to him as he straightened out of his mother’s embrace, “I know it’s last minute and all, but do you think we could stay with you over summer vacation?”

At the mention of the word we, Steve’s parents realized that their son was not alone, and their eyes moved over Claudia. Torn jeans, black boots, a vest with a number of pin’s on it, black painted nails… she was a sight to take in to be sure, and Claudia wondered if maybe she should have worn something different before meeting her best friend’s parents…

“Of course,” Steve’s dad cleared his throat, “Let the kids in, Emma. Steve, don’t you let her carry your luggage.” He warned when his mom moved to take his suitcase.

Claudia readjusted her grip on her own canvas bag as her hands became moist with sweat. She tried not to let her eyes wander around their home as she followed Steve through the door. It was an old habit from being placed in new homes as a kid, trying to learn as much about the new family as possible in the first thirty seconds without saying a word.

They stood awkwardly for a moment in the entry way, the door closing and suddenly Claudia felt like a caged animal. She had been putting on a brave face for the sake of her friend, but truth be told, she was terrified of this moment. Steve insisted she not stay on campus by herself for three months, and Claudia complied because she could tell this was something he needed.

“Mom, Dad,” Steve drew their attention from their gaping at her, “This is my best friend Claudia Donavan. Claud this is Emma and Steven Jinks, my parents.”*

“It’s nice to meet you,” Claudia’s voice came out a higher octave than normal, and she felt herself blush as she wiped her hand on her jeans and held out her hand.

Mr. Jinks was the first to accept the offer after seeming to shake himself from his trance. He smiled, looking more and more like Steve with every passing moment, if not for the brown eyes and thick mustache, they would have been identical.

“I’m sorry,” Mrs. Jinks breathed, “I don’t mean to stare, you just look so much like my daughter.”

“If I take into account everything Jinksy has told me, that is a huge compliment.” Claudia swallowed hard.

Steve had told her about Olivia, how she got him through his entire childhood. How she died suddenly. How messed up he had been afterword. What he never mentioned was that Claudia actually _looked_ like Olivia. Perhaps that’s what caused him to be so protective over her when they first met.

Emma Jinks led the two friends up stairs, Steve to his own old room, which hadn’t changed at all since he last had been in it. Well, except his sheets, which his mom obviously continued to change every week. “We always hoped you would come back.” She admitted in a whisper when he seemed surprised. This statement only seemed to befuddle him more.

Claudia was taken to what she assumed used to be Olivia’s room. Much like Steve’s room, it had been largely left the same, but it was obvious to Steve that they had slowly been boxing some of his sister’s things up. Slowly saying goodbye to the daughter that died nearly five years ago.

When they sat around the living room half an hour later, Claudia couldn’t keep her foot from bouncing and her eyes from wandering over pictures. There were only pictures of before Olivia died. A smiling thirteen year old Steve, already tall for his age, a happy redhead with her arms wrapped around his neck. A few family portraits. A graduation picture of Olivia. Evidence of a once happy family yet to be touched by loss.

“So,” Mr. Jinks voice had her eyes snapping back in to focus, “Are you gay, too?” he asked.

“Dad!” Steve objected, appalled at his father, he had really hoped his father had come to terms with his son’s sexuality by now.

But Claudia only smiled. Steven Jinks was brash, but he hadn’t meant offense by it, and she was good at reading people, so she only shook her head, “I haven’t quite figured that out, yet. I’ll keep you updated though, Mr. Jinks.”

His cheeks dimpled at the snarky response, “If you’re going to be staying here for the next few months, I’d really like it if you called me, Steven.”

Claudia blushed, “I’ll try.”

“What have you kids been up to the last few years?” Emma asked, “We haven’t heard from you in so long, how is your life? How’s Liam?”

Steve was touched his mom remembered his boyfriend, but nervous about answering any questions about his life, “Liam’s okay. He and I broke up a few weeks after school started.”

“That’s terrible,” Emma seemed to mean it.

“His loss.” Steven shrugged, “How have you been keeping yourself busy?”

Claudia and Steve exchanged a glance, unsure of what to tell them. The curiosities? The near death experiences? The partying? Maybe the less they knew about their son’s college life the better. After all, they were still hiding from some vague government agency.

So instead, he told them about Pete. His first real friend who didn’t give a damn about his sexuality, saved him from being friendless. His genuinely sweet and caring personality and insistence that he was Steve’s type. He told them about Myka, how she somehow managed to keep a 4.0 in college and also keep Steve and Pete on track. He gave them an edited version about how he met Claudia, in a library after she met Myka through a mutual friend. He told them about how he had an awesome group of friends now, that all looked after one another.

Claudia smiled at how happy his parents looked for him.

Steve was ecstatic at how accepting his parents were about Claudia in all her weird glory. His dad seemed to genuinely enjoy her dry sense of humor. His mom liked having her son and his friend to dote over, the house had felt far too empty.

It was a strained peace in the house for two weeks before it broke. Claudia doesn’t know what started it, but it was as if seven years of arguments spilled over at once. She had been up stairs so all she heard was glass shattering as a yelling match ensued.

She hopped up from her computer and was yanked back by the headphones she still had on, “Frak!”

She almost fell down the stairs, taking them two at a time, before she came to a sliding stop in the kitchen, her socks working to find traction. Steven and Steve were both read in the face while Emma was trying to talk one or both of them down.

“Hey!” Claudia called, but it was lost in the noise, she took a step forward, swearing when a piece of broken plate went through her sock and into her foot. Frustrated and now in pain, Claudia let out a high pitched whistle.

Everyone stopped talking at once and turned to look at Claudia, shock replacing anger on their faces as they looked at the enraged redhead.

“What are you guys doing?” she demanded, “Why are you screaming at each other? You know what, I don’t even care. I don’t know much about families, I’ve been in my fair share of dysfunctional homes though, so I want you to hear what I have to say, and then you can go back to tearing each other’s heads off. I don’t know what happened to make you all fight like this, but whatever it is, it isn’t important enough to tear you apart. You lost a daughter, okay? I get that, believe me, I lost my parents and both of my siblings, okay? But you still have each other. Which is a lot more than a lot of people can say. So, let it go. And just… I don’t know, be happy you still have people who love you.” Claudia’s tone lost its heat as she wore her anger out and pain took over, her foot was really bleeding now.

So she turned on her heel and left them to glance guiltily at each other while she limped her way back up the stairs to the bathroom. She winced as she pulled the bloody sock from her foot. She had to bite the sleeve of her shirt as she let the water run over it. It didn’t look like it needed stitches, so she tied a hand towel around her foot tightly.

She stuck her head out of the door, but the house was silent. She was worried about her outburst, figuring it was only a matter of time before they told her she over stayed her welcome. It wasn’t her place to break up a family fight, she didn’t even know what caused her to step in, it wasn’t in her character. She had just seen the pain on her best friend’s face and snapped.

She tiptoed to her borrowed room and shut the door as quietly as she could. She looked around the dark room, at her things that had slowly begun to take over. She sighed and slowly began to pack up. When it was mostly done she pulled out her laptop and typed out an email to the one other person she figured could put up with her for an extended period of time.

There was a five hour time difference, making it nearly midnight in London, but she knew Helena had a sleep schedule as messed up as her.

_Hey, I think I messed up. I know it would be putting you out, but how much would you mind if I stayed with you for the remainder of the summer?_

She hit send just as there was a soft knock at the door. SHE expected to see Steve, but it was Emma who sheepishly walked in.

“Do you mind if I talk to you for a bit, Claudia?” her voice as soft, so different from her harsh shouts earlier.

“No, of course not.” Claudia blushed and spun her chair around as Emma sat on the edge of the bed, “Look, I’m really sorry about earlier, it wasn’t my place to get involved, especially after you guys have been so nice letting me crash here.”

Emma smiled sadly, “You are so much like my daughter…” she took a breath, “Claudia, it is we who should be apologizing to you. We are a family of hot tempers and pride. No one wants to admit they are in the wrong. The truth is, Steven and I are so grateful for you, for what you’ve done for Stevie. When he left, it was like I had lost two children instead of one, and you brought him back.

“We had wanted him to come back for so long,” She wiped at the corner of her eye where a tear had begun to escape, “We wanted to apologize to him for how we reacted to him. He is still our son and we love him no matter who he loves. We just wanted a chance to tell him that, it just took us a while to get over ourselves…”

“Have you told him that?” Claudia spoke before she could stop herself.

“Steven’s talking to him now,” Emma nodded, “It’ll mean more coming from him, and those two always did communicate better without an audience.” She finally seemed to look around the room and realize all of Claudia’s packing.

“Where are you going?” Sadness filled Mrs. Jinks’ voice.

Claudia shrugged, “I figured you guys don’t really need me around anymore… I don’t want to be a burden or anything.”

“Claudia,” Emma shook her head, “You’re not a burden. We love having you here. You’re smart, kind-hearted, you make my husband laugh, which is damn near impossible. My son obviously adores you. You are always welcome here.”

Claudia swallowed thickly, “I’ve been in a lot of homes,” she spoke gruffly, and Emma listened closer, Claudia hadn’t spoken much about her past, “And so far this is my favorite.” She admitted.

Emma rose on her feet and embraced the young girl, “Well, it’s yours as long as you want it to be.”

Claudia unpacked.

HG emailed her back twenty minutes later.

_Of course, darling. It wouldn’t be a problem at all. What happened?_

Claudia had to explain that it wasn’t necessary anymore. She told her what happened, vented two weeks’ worth of gossip to her. She loved Steve, but she had spent nearly all her time with HG before him, and she missed her greatly.

Helena and Claudia emailed back and forth several times a week from then on, each telling the other what was happening in their life. Claudia learned more about her roommate while they were thirty five hundred miles away than when they slept five feet from each other.

The most prominent points in HG’s emails, aside from her great loathing of her ex-fiancé and his family, was her love for her daughter, and how much she missed Myka. Claudia’s heart hurt for her friend, but she wanted to slap the girl across the face for not saying all of this to Myka instead.

HG insisted she would once she got matters sorted out in London and returned. Claudia was going to hold her to that if it was the last thing she did.

Apparently, Claudia wasn’t the only one hell bent on fixing relationships. Steve took a page form his best friend’s book and began doing research into Joshua Donavan.

He was employed by some government agency Steve had never heard of, but he found out where he was living before talking to Claudia. After a lot of yelling and using her own logic against her, Steve had Claudia on a plane to South Dakota.

Joshua agreed to meet them in a small diner in some run down town called Univille. It was an awkward lunch, full of dodgy answers from her brother and halfhearted apologies. Steve took Claudia home, disappointed he couldn’t fix their relationship, but she reassured him it would take a lot more than one lunch to fix twelve years of abandonment issues. She rushed them to get back to Jersey, because the small stepford-esc town was freaking her out.

When Steve poked fun at her for it she glared at him.

“You don’t feel it?” she asked, “Something is definitely… _off_ here…” She shook her head and pushed him on.

The last month of their vacation seemed to go by far too quickly.

Claudia met a boy in the hardware store she frequented, Doug Fargo, and had dated him for a bit. Even took him home to meet Steve’s parents as if they were her own. And they treated her as such, Steven asking Fargo a myriad of uncomfortable questions that left him stammering and Claudia blushing. Eventually, Claudia decided it might be best to stop seeing Fargo. What was the point when she would be returning to California soon anyway?

Two weeks left and Claudia was getting antsy. She loved this place, she was happier than she was in a long time, and Steve seemed so at peace now, but it wasn’t them she was worried about. HG’s emails were becoming progressively darker as her situation overseas was becoming desperate. Finally, Claudia could handle it no more.

“We’re going to Colorado.” She told Steve who was trying to meditate when she interrupted him and barged into his room, “We are gonna go hang out with Myka and Pete until the fall semester starts.”

“And why are we doing that?” He asked, not that he was against it, his best friend just had a manic expression that had him apprehensive.

“HG and Myka, they need to address this thing between them before I explode.” She began pacing back and forth.

“Wow I haven’t seen you this worked up since Beckett admitted she remembered everything.” He said, referring to the latest show he and Claudia had become addicted to.

“What do you expect? Mykes and HG are my real life Caskett,” she mumbled, “Anyway, I’m worried about HG, she’s having a tough time,” she said vaguely, not having told Steve what was going on with her friend, “So I was going to invite her to go with us.”

“You really think that this will work?” he sighed, sensing this was a losing battle for him.

“It has to.” She insisted.

She emailed HG and told her that she should go with them to Colorado Springs. She told a white lie to get her to fly in, but it worked. Saying goodbye to Emma and Steven was harder than Claudia thought it would be.

“I’ve been in a lot of families,” she said as she hugged them both tightly, “But you have felt more like parents to me than anyone else. Thank you.” She swallowed thickly.

“Take care of yourself,” Emma wiped tears from her cheeks, “Don’t mess up your sleeping schedule again, and make sure that you eat every day, and not junk food either, you hear me? And stop putting these crazy streaks in your hair.” She fingered the long pink streak that ran through Claudia’s hair.

“Okay _mom,_ ” Claudia rolled her eyes but blushed and Emma hugged her once more.

Steven insisted that they come back soon and Steve agreed they would try.

They met HG at the airport after her flight from London connected to Newark. Claudia met her with a hug, and the Brit felt smaller than usual. Not just like she lost a few pounds, she also was hunched in a little, a little more tired looking. Her longer hair only served to hide the exhaustion better. HG paid extra to have her car, which Steve and Claudia drove to Jersey to stall the inevitable, shipped back to California.

She didn’t talk on the plane ride, didn’t speak at all until they were in a Taxi that would take them to Bering and Son’s bookstore.

“Are you sure she wants to see me?” Helena’s voice was filled with a heart breaking mixture of hope and sadness.

“Of course,” Claudia waved her off, but refused to make eye contact, “I mean, I haven’t spoken to her in three months but I’m sure…,”

“You didn’t tell her we were coming?” Steve snapped at her.

HG looked like she was going to be sick, like a trapped animal, but they were in front of the old bookstore and there was nothing left to do but go in.

Helena hung back while Steve and Claudia lead the way through the door.

 “I’ll be with you in a minute!” They heard her voice call from amongst the shelves. They looked at one another, then at HG to be sure she was still with them. Helena had lifted her head at the sound of Myka’s voice, and it broke Claudia’s heart a little to see it.

They walked through the store to where they thought they heard Myka’s voice echo out from. What they saw had them stumbling to a stop at the top of the aisle.

“Do my eyes deceive me, Jinksey?” Claudia let her eyes survey the girl she barely recognized as Myka, “Or is that our Mykes wearing high heels?”

Myka spun around disbelief clear in her features, even behind the makeup that Claudia hadn’t ever seen her really wear before. She wasn’t even wearing clothes Steve recognize. High heeled boots, dark skinny jeans, and a tight black tank top under an open white button down shirt. The dorky glasses were gone and her hair was straightened and she even walked differently than before “Claudia! Steve!” she smiled hugely before rushing to hug them both, “Oh my god, I missed you both so much!”

“Where’s Pete?” Steve asked after he released her, looking around for a buffer before the biggest surprise was revealed. If something went wrong, he would need the other guy in the group to help settle it down.

“Oh, he’s probably hanging out around town somewhere,” Myka waved her hand and rolled her eyes, blasé about everything it would seem, “I’ll be meeting up with him later.”

Steve was about to suggest that they go find him then when Myka lifted her head slightly, her face paling as her makeup darkened eyes focused beyond Steve’s shoulder.

“H…HG?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I don’t think it ever said or described Jinks’ dad, so I took a few liberties. If they did mention him, my bad.


	3. Summer (pt3)

Helena had missed so much since she was in London last. Christina was walking, starting to talk. Helena was secretly glad that the older the little girl got the more she looked like her mother and less like her father.

Christina knew that Helena was her Mum, but she was nervous being around her at first, she hadn’t seen much of her in the last two years. Her Uncle Charles and Aunt Isabel had raised her thus far. And it wasn’t even until winter that her father began making appearances in her life.

When Helena had stepped off the plane, her tear stained and heartbroken face couldn’t help but to break into a smile when she saw her daughter in her brother’s arms. HG’s steps were wide, near to running until she stood right before them. She was unsure what she should do.

“Do you know who I am?” Helena asked softly of the dark eyed child.

Christina nodded, her eyes far too intelligent for that of a three year old, though she was soon to be four.

“Do you mind if I hold you?” HG asked, trying not to start crying once more, “I’ve missed you so, so much.”

Christina nodded again and held her hands out for her Mum. Helena’s chuckle came out sounding an awful lot like a sob as she clutched her daughter to her chest and buried her nose in the long locks of hers.

Helena didn’t let go of her until they were driving to her brother’s flat. Even then it was so that she could get a better look at her. And Christina seemed to be doing the same. “You have pretty hair, Mummy.” She said very seriously.

“As do you, my love,” Helena chuckled as she tucked her daughter’s hair back.

It was rather late when they got home, so Helena tucked her daughter in to bed, reading her a book until she was snoring softly, snuggling with an obviously well-loved stuffed giraffe. She watched her for a long moment before backing out of the room and shutting her door softly.

“We need to talk, Helena,” Charles said seriously as she entered the kitchen, staring into a seeping tea cup, Isabel was nowhere to be seen.

“I need a drink first,” she grumbled, “I’ve had a bit of a long day, brother, please tell me you have something a bit stronger than tea in here somewhere.”

He sighed, but his sister was old enough now to have a drink when she wanted, he supposed. She definitely appeared more mature than when she left to America. So he rose and pulled bourbon from a cabinet and poured her a glass. She drank it far too fast for a drink as expensive as what he poured, but he supposed she needed it.

“I’m sorry,” he said after a moment of heavy silence, “I would have fought for her, Hel, I would have I swear. I love her like she was my own. But Isabel… She wants a daughter of her own. And Nate is making a strong case in his favor.”

“I still cannot believe that bastard is petitioning for full custody of _my_ daughter!” HG growled into her glass.

“Christina is his daughter too, Hel,” Charles was playing devil’s advocate, preparing his sister for the shit storm she was about to hit her.

“Oh is he?” Helena’s eye’s flashed dangerously, “I could have sworn that he left to be with that blonde tramp whilst I was still pregnant. He certainly was not there for the year and a half I raised her on my own, so why now? Why does he want her _now_?”

“They can ask you the same thing, Helena.” Charles pointed out, “You left for America two years ago, relinquishing custody of Christina to me. So why do you want her now?”

“I always wanted her, Charles!” Helena restrained her shout, and took a breath, “I wasn’t a good mother for her then, I wanted to make something of myself so that she could have a mother to be proud of. Not one who could barely make ends meet for herself and had to finish her schooling through tutors. I wanted to be good enough for her.”

“Well then, my dear sister, you had better be ready to fight tooth and nail to keep her.” He kissed her on the cheek before retiring to bed.

Helena wrote her first letter to Myka that night. Fully intending to put it in the post in the morning, but when she had signed her name at the bottom, she knew she would never have the nerve to send it to her. She folded it carefully and put it inside a small box. By the end of the summer, that box would be full to bursting with Helena’s penned words to Myka.

Helena met with her lawyer the next day. They went over everything, how her schooling was going, how much money she was making, how much she was bringing in in royalties from different companies that marketed her inventions. Anything that would make her look good in court and anything they should be worried about. But since Helena had mostly behaved in her time across the pond, she wasn’t too concerned. Unless they somehow found out about spring break, but she doubted that greatly since no one had come to collect them yet.

After she spent hours with him badgering her, she finally rolled her eyes and huffed, claiming she had had enough of the third degree, and left.

She missed her daughter already, though they hadn’t been apart that long. She took her to the park for the afternoon, watched her on the swing, relishing in the sound of her laugh when she pushed her higher.  She was sitting on the bench, listening intently to the story Christina was telling, explaining the life of the nice monster who lived under her bed, when a familiar voice had her looking up.

“My, my, if it isn’t Helena Wells,” his voice was missing the crack in it HG was listening for, but she knew it anywhere.

She turned with a smile to find William Wollcott standing with his hands in his pockets, “Wolly!” she jumped and gathered her old friend in a hug.

He laughed, “What brings you back to London? Have the yanks finally run you off?”

“For the time being,” Helena grinned conspiratorially, remembering all the trouble she had gotten into corrupting the man before her when he was still just a boy.

“Is this your daughter?” he asked as he smiled down at a blushing Christina, “She’s much bigger than I remember her being.”

“Yes, Christina, this is a very good friend of mine, Wolly.”

“It is nice to meet you Christina,” he put his hand out to the young girl as if she were an equal and she puffed up and shook it briskly and HG had to fight a smile, “The last time I saw you, you were still a tiny little thing. Now look at you, practically grown up, how old are you?”

“Three,” Christina said proudly, “But I turn four next month,”

“My goodness I am getting old.” He fanned his face with his hand and Christina giggled.

They had a lovely afternoon as they walked with Christina through the park. HG felt some of the shadow that hung over her lift in the presence of her friend who always seemed to be in a good mood, and it was contagious.

He walked with them back to Charles’, pausing when a dark haired man stood at the building’s entrance. His face was set in a frown, his grey eyes pensive as he paced back and forth.

“Uh oh,” Wolly breathed.

“I’ll have to speak to him eventually,” Helena steeled herself as she clutched her daughter closer.

“That’s Dad,” Christina pointed out helpfully with a sigh.

“Yes, my love, I know.” Helena grumbled.

“I can stay if you want,” Wolly offered, glaring at the waiting man.

“That’s sweet, really,” Helena shook her head, “But I think I can handle Nate on my own.”

Wolly nodded before walking away. Christina waved to him, “Bye-Bye, Wolly!” she called loudly and Nate’s eyes snapped up and focused on them.

Helena took a breath and strode towards her ex-fiancé. “Nathaniel,” she greeted coolly.

“Hey, pumpkin,” Nate said, focusing only on Christina as he spoke.

Helena tried to hide her happiness when her daughter made no move to go to him. Nate gave her a long once over, smirking as he did so, and HG was having trouble remembering what she saw in him as a teenager.

“You look good, Hel,” he smiled and Helena noted the slight dilation in his pupils, “I told you America was funner than England.”

“’Funner’ is not a word, Nate,” HG rolled her eyes, “Did you ever think perhaps the reason I did not go to America prior was because I feared every American would be just like you?”

“Ouch, that hurts, Hel,” Nate feinted pain in his chest as he winked.

“What are you doing here, Nate?” Helena demanded.

“I’m here to see my daughter,” he crossed his arms over his chest.

“That’s strange,” Helena tilted her head, “I don’t recall you ever having a child.”

Nate’s eyes narrowed, “You really gonna play it like that, Helena? You can’t keep her from me forever you know, my lawyer is gonna get her for me.”

“Well, I wish you the best of luck,” Helena stepped around him, clutching Christina closer to her, “And I also invite you to get hit by a bus on your way back your parent’s home.”

He shouted words that caused HG to cover Christina’s ears as best she could before the closing door cut him off.

“You and Dad don’t get along, do you?” Christina asked softly.

“You are far too brilliant for a three year old,” Helena sighed with a smile.

“No, I’m almost four, Mummy,” she insisted,

“Right you are, little one.” Helena held her tightly, fearing everything Nate was threatening her with.

Two weeks of arguing lawyers had exhausted Helena to the bone. But even when night came she couldn’t sleep, so she spent her evenings writing to Myka. Saying everything she should have told her when she had the chance and more. When Claudia emailed her, asking if she could join her for the duration of the summer, Helena felt a spark of joy.

She had been spending her days with Wolly or Charles, keeping her daughter close to her at all times. She was afraid if she looked away for one moment that someone would take her away. It was getting to her, and she missed her American friends so much, having the snarky redhead there would make it all infinitely more bearable.

But the issue Claudia had been having was resolved and Helena’s heart fell. However, now she had someone apart from the situation, someone she trusted implicitly to talk to about everything that was happening, and that helped for a while.

Myka was never far from Helena’s mind. It didn’t help that she had kept the other girls sweater. It reminded her of the day she woke up in her arms. She had jumped out of bed and grabbed the first thing to put over her mostly naked body- the Bering and Son’s pullover. She had never given it back to Myka, enjoying wearing it far too much. She would put it on when she was alone, tuck her nose into different parts and breathe in the scent of Myka. God, how she missed her so. It was awful when she realized the sweater smelled less and less like Myka each passing day, and smelled more like her.

She had trouble eating, stress did that to her. She tried her best to keep on a strong front for the world, but it was getting harder and harder to do so. Most days she just opted to cuddle on the couch with Christina and read to her.

This place was eating her alive, sapping her will to live. If it weren’t for Wolly’s company, Christina’s smiles, Claudia’s emails and the letters she wrote for Myka, she wouldn’t have made it this far.

Nate’s parents were harassing her parents with phone calls, they wouldn’t listen when they first tried to tell them they had nothing to do with their daughter. They hadn’t agreed with any of Helena’s decisions. Not with keeping the baby when she found out she was pregnant, not with marrying the boy who had gotten her pregnant, then her calling off the wedding when she was six months pregnant had been the last straw. But the Watkins’ had struck the prideful nerve in the Wells’ family and the wagons circled. Helena was welcomed back in to the family fold as well as her daughter.

Christina was taking it all surprisingly well. All she cared about was her mother’s return and playing with Wolly, who had become the sitter whenever Helena was called away. He was one of the few she trusted with her daughter’s life.

It was two weeks before she was due to return for school, and the custody case had gone nowhere.

She sat at a table, her back straight but her mind wandering, trying to remember if she had eaten that day, wondering how much longer she had to sit there before she could go back to her daughter. Nate sat across from her, an angry set to his face as his eyes watched the lawyers volley back and forth. The judge at the head of the table seemed to be just as tired as HG felt when he finally called for them to pay attention.

“Alright, here is what I have heard,” he grumbled, “You had the child at seventeen, correct?”

“Yes,” Helena nodded.

“You two were engaged but it was called off because?” the judge prompted.

“Philandering.” Helena’s lawyer provided.

“That’s a bit harsh, your honor,” Nate’s lawyer interjected.

“Did you or did you not cheat on your fiancé, Mr. Watkins?” the judge sighed.

“Yes, but-,” Nate tried.

“That’s all I need to know,” The judge held a hand up, “And you, Ms. Wells, you left your daughter in the care of your brother to attend university, is that correct?”

“Yes,” Helena dropped her eyes to the table.

“Mr. Watkins, you currently are unemployed and living with your parents?” the judge asked.

“They are willing to assist in the raising of the child.” The lawyer insisted.

“I’ll take that as a yes, then,” the judge rolled his eyes, “And Ms. Wells, you are enrolled to continue college this fall?”

“She is, your honor.” Her lawyer spoke for her, “She also has a steady in come and can support the child on her own.”

The judge huffed and sat back in his chair, “I just don’t know what to do with you two, but to temporarily give you both shared custody until I can evaluate this again in eighteen months.”

“Your honor,” Helena was speaking before thinking, never a good thing, but she was panicking, she couldn’t stay in London much longer, and she most certainly couldn’t leave her daughter here, “If I may, I think I might have a solution.”

“Let’s hear it Ms. Wells.” The judge motioned for her to continue.

Helena wished she had slept the night before now, she wasn’t sure if any of what she was saying was making sense, but the judge seemed to seriously be considering her proposal.

“And what does opposing counsel have to say?” he turned to Nate’s lawyer when Helena had finished.

Nate and his rat-faced lawyer whispered low to one another before Nate looked at Helena with a wicked smirk. “We will accept the terms Ms. Wells has offered on the condition that Christina is placed in my client’s care until such time as Ms. Wells can come through on her side of the deal. Keep her honest.”

Helena scoffed at his audacity, but the judge nodded, “Alright. Papers will be delivered to your lawyers for both of you to sign. Ms. Wells, you will surrender custody of your daughter until such time that you do as you have stated.”

It was the hardest thing Helena had to do to pass Christina over to Nate’s arms that night. She had a resigned look on her small face. Helena had explained to her over and over again that it was only temporary. They would be back together soon, and nothing would get between them. Christina had been more mature about it than her mother. She hugged Helena tight around the neck until HG’s tears stopped flowing down her face.

She lay in bed for two days straight. All her letters to Myka tear stained and sloppy. She kept the laptop in her bed so she could talk to Claudia.

When her roommate told her that they were going to Colorado Springs until school started the following week. Claudia insisted that Myka wanted to see HG, and Helena felt the first stirrings of hope inside her. She would be with Myka again soon. That was enough to get her out of bed and into her packing mode.

She kept focused at the task at hand. Not worrying about the next thing to do until the time came to do it. Before she knew it, she was standing in the airport watching as Steve and Claudia walked to her.

The pair looked so much happier and healthier than when she had seen them last, and it made her realize just how much she had missed seeing them every day. She hugged Claudia as tightly as she could, but it didn’t feel tight enough to chase away the cold that settled in her.

She dozed on the plane, stared out the window when she was awake. She didn’t feel much like talking. Her heart was pulling her in two different directions. One, back to London where her daughter was staying with that ass of an ex who refused to let Helena say goodbye before her flight. The other, to Colorado.

She was worried about her reunion with Myka. She had broken her heart when she left, that much HG knew. She only hoped that Myka would forgive her, see how much Helena had missed her. She hoped Myka would listen to her, allow her to beg for forgiveness.

She hoped Myka had missed Helena as much as Helena had missed Myka.

“Are you sure she wants to see me?” HG asked as the taxi drew ever so nearer to the bookstore owned by Myka’s parents.

“Of course,” Claudia’s tone held a false note in it and HG became immediately suspicious, “I mean, I haven’t spoken to her in three months but I’m sure…,” she trailed off.

“You didn’t tell her we were coming?” Steve’s voice barely registered to Helena.

She felt like she was going to throw up, not that there was anything in her stomach to vomit. She was close to opening the taxi door and getting out while it was still moving. Myka didn’t know HG was coming, possibly didn’t even want Helena to come. What if she hated her? Sent her away? Would there be loathing in her green eyes instead of love?

HG’s plan to jump out of the moving vehicle was foiled when they pulled up to their destination. They had made a stop at the hotel they were staying at and left their luggage before venturing, so when the taxi quickly left, HG had nowhere else to go but follow her friends inside the bookstore.

A small bell chimed overhead as she walked into the blessedly cool store, and the most beautiful voice called out to them, “I’ll be with you in a minute!” It was a balm on her aching soul. She just wanted to collapse into the arms of the voice’s owner and pout out her hearts yearnings.

She didn’t realize she had spaced out until she noticed Claudia and Steve had continued on without her. She moved to catch up, Myka’s voice drawing her near.

She could hear the smile in the way Myka spoke, and it was all the push Helena needed before she stepped out from behind the shelf.

When HG finally lay eyes on her at last, it felt as if time had slowed down just so she could appreciate this moment. She knew the woman at the end of the row was Myka, but she looked different… before she could dwell further on it, Myka looked up, her nose twitching and her smile disappearing.

“H…HG?”


	4. Awkward

“H…HG?” Myka tried to remember how to close her jaw as she took in the sight before her.

Helena G. Wells. The woman who tormented her in her thoughts and dreams was now standing before her in her parents’ bookstore. She expected to see the cocky smile, the knowing glint in her gorgeous eyes. But she didn’t.

What she saw instead made her heart twist further into itself then it had before. The first thing she noticed was Helena was somehow _more_ beautiful than she remembered. The last three months had somehow made Myka convince herself that no one was as stunning as she thought HG was. Proof against that was standing at the end of the aisle now, clad in a loose white t-shirt and jeans- much more low-key than the brunette was used to seeing the inventor in. The hair was second, not odd since she always loved Helena’s hair, and it’s new length only made her want to run her hands through it _more._

But then she saw the dark circles that professed more than a couple missed nights of sleep. Her quick mind also added that she had definitely lost weight in a scary way. The woman practically radiated exhaustion, and if it weren’t for Myka’s pride, she would have rushed forward to gather HG in a tight hug.

As it was, she stood still as a statue trying to figure out what was going on.

“Myka,” Helena smiled as she sighed her name.

Part of HG’s broken heart was mended upon seeing the other woman, though she didn’t look as Helena remembered her. Her curly locks had been straightened, dyed darker- a shade shy of black. Her engaging eyes were heavily lined and her lips were shiny with gloss. Her black vest top clung to her body where Helena could see new muscle. Her legs, always a distracting feature for her, in Myka’s painted on jeans looked amazing. And the boots added to her height. She looked _good_ , if a bit taken off guard at the moment, and Helena _really_ just wanted to hold her close and breathe her in.

Myka seemed to snap back to reality at the sound of Helena’s voice and she physically shook herself and her eyes adopted a careful guarded look, “What are you doing here?”

Helena struggled to find words to speak, all the things she wanted to tell Myka fell away as the other girls mask came up, “I wanted to see you before… to tell you…”

“Hey, babe?” A voice called, and it was as if an electrical shock went through Myka and she straightened.

A tall man walked up from behind Myka, a cardboard box in his hands and a disgruntled look to his grey eyes as they were focused on the contents of the box. Helena quickly sized him up, her mind working only a fraction slower than normal. Heavily muscled, clearly he played sports, his eyes were clear and his mouth, though frowning now, was used to smiling often. His black hair was carefully gelled into spikes that managed to seem intentional and accidental all at the same time. His grey shirt hugged his frame and said Bering and Son’s across his chest.

But she was far more interested in the reaction his presence had gotten from Myka, it was only then that it registered in Helena’s mind just what this man had called Myka.

“This box only has half of the books your dad told me to look for today, is there another…” Kurt trailed off as he looked up, “Oh, who are your friends?” he asked, an easy smile breaking over his features.

“Um,” Myka shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut as she forced a smile on her face, “Right, this is Claudia, Steve,” she waved to each of them pausing a moment before making eye contact with Helena again, “and Hel ... HG.” No one but the Brit noticed Myka’s stammer, “They’re my friends from school. Guys, this is Kurt, my boyfriend?” Myka hoped no one heard the question her tone had become.

Kurt sure didn’t as he put down the box of new inventory and wiped his hands on his blue jeans, “It’s great to meet you guys,” his voice held no false note. Myka didn’t speak much about her college experiences, it felt good to be shown this little bit.

Steve’s smile was strained as he accepted Kurt’s hand first. Assessing the strength in the taller man’s grip.

Claudia plastered on a polite grin, “Kurt, was it?” she asked.

“Kurt Smoller,” he nodded, “Claudia, right?”

Claudia hummed in assent as she filed away his full name to later be researched.

Helena seemed to pause a moment before accepting the man’s hand, she seemed even smaller to Myka as she stood next to her boyfriend, but all her exhaustion and sadness seemed to evaporate, replaced by the bravado everyone had grown accustomed to.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Kurt.” Helena smiled, though it didn’t reach her eyes.

Kurt’s own grin widened as he looked down on HG, “British, huh? That’s so cool.”

“Indeed,” Helena’s tone became clipped.

“What brings you to Colorado Springs?” he asked the group at large, but his eyes stayed focused on HG as he spoke.

It was Claudia who answered though, recognizing the look in her roommate’s eyes, “We thought we could, you know, catch up with each other before we all go back to school next week.”

“That’s so cool,” Kurt nodded, finally moving his eyes away from HG to look at the techie, “I’ve always wanted to meet Bunny’s friends from school.”

Myka saw Helena’s eyebrow quirk as her brown eyes flicked quickly to Myka’s briefly, and Myka felt her face flush.

“But you’re clearly working right now,” Steve interjected before the tension in the room became too much to handle, “So we are just going to go find Pete and hang out with him. We can all catch up after you finish your shift.”

“Yeah,” Kurt spoke for Myka, who was still half convinced she was going to wake up in bed at any minute, “That’s cool. We can all go out tonight. The bowling alley maybe? I was promised a rematch by the Petester.” He chuckled.

Helena was staring at Myka once more, but the brunette was refusing eye contact, looking at everything but her three friends standing in front of her now. Pain ricocheted through her chest and she felt as if she was going to be sick once more.

“That sounds wonderful,” Helena’s voice did not betray her, for which she was eternally grateful, “We clearly have so much to catch up on, and I for one am just dying to learn more about our Myka’s newest love interest.”

Claudia gaped at HG, and Steve cracked his knuckles nervously as Myka’s face flushed, this time in anger at Helena’s coolness. Kurt was the only one who seemed to enjoy what was happening.

“We shall see you later then?” Helena had begun to back away, “Myka,” she nodded to the brunette, her voice bearing the faintest hint of pain.

Claudia and Steve exchanged a look before forcing smiles and waving to Myka. Retreating from her cold gaze as it landed on them. Oh yes, they were in trouble.

“Your friends seem nice,” Kurt smiled as he turned back to the box of books needing to be shelved, “Especially HG. How’d you guys meet anyway?”

Myka groaned internally, “That’s a story I think we can save for tonight.” She smiled sweetly at him, anger slowly replacing shock.

Angry that Helena had shown back up, angry that her boyfriend had set them all to hangout in a few hours. She had been doing so well, hadn’t she? Now she felt as if all those weeks of getting over Helena had gone to waste.

But she wouldn’t let it, she was going to show everyone that she was happy now.

She looked once more at the book she had put aside. She stared at it for a long moment, Kurt unaware of her attention being elsewhere as he stocked the new shipment. She grabbed it from the shelf with every intention of putting it with the rest of the H.G. Wells collection. But the front page opened and she froze.

Was her father aware of the book that came in? Did he just order the box from some random collector who was unaware of what they had? Myka didn’t care, and clutched the book tighter to her chest.

Kurt looked at her and quirked an eyebrow, having finished with the books save the one she held onto now.

“I think I’ll hang on to this one.” Myka’s voice was careful, she had a plan for this book that she wasn’t exactly keen on sharing with anyone, since even she wasn’t sure why she wanted to keep this book only to give it away at some later date.

“Bunny, you have, like, a thousand books already.” Kurt grinned and shook his head, holding his hand out still for the tome.

Myka took a step back though, “I know, but I don’t have this book. I’ve actually been looking for it.” She lied smoothly, because it wasn’t really a lie, she just didn’t realize it.

Kurt stared at her for a moment longer before shrugging. He knew the girl liked books from being up in her room, but he didn’t realize how much. And if her biggest problem was being a book lover, he figured he could deal with it.

Myka kept the book tightly held to her as she bound up the stairs to her room, throwing an excuse over her shoulder to Kurt, something about getting ready, but she wasn’t thinking clearly.

She pulled a box from under her bed. Loose leaf pages of a book she had stopped writing were clipped together. A grappling hook with a post-it still attached. A few photos of Myka and a smiling Brit. Myka didn’t let her eyes rest on any of these things for too long as she gingerly placed the book next to the rest. She swallowed thickly before replacing the lid and shoving the box back under the bed.

LINE BREAK

“This was a horrid idea,” Helena growled as she stomped a head of Steve and Claudia, “She has a bloody _boyfriend_!”

She had no idea where she was going, she just knew she wanted to put as much distance between her and whatever the bloody hell that was behind her, “And you lied to me.” Her body was trying to decide if it was anger or pain filling her now.

“I know, HG,” Claudia struggled to keep up, “I didn’t know she would have a boyfriend, I mean after all the time we spent together I didn’t think-,”

“That’s the problem!” Helena spun on her, “You didn’t think! Now what am I to do? I left London, I left Christina, for nothing!”

“For nothing?” Claudia challenged, not backing down like she once might have, “HG, you really think that Kurt Smoller stands a chance against the great HG Wells when she puts her mind to something? You can win her back!”

“How do I do that?” Helena’s voice was small, her anger temporarily spent as tiredness settled once more upon her shoulders.

“I don’t know yet,” Claudia admitted, “But we’ll help you. Don’t worry, alright? I know that Myka still feels for you, you can get her back.” It was obvious to the redhead that there were a lot of issues in the air around her two friends, but her normal cynicism about the world had given away in the presence of what she perceived to be true love.

“Well, well, well,” the three straightened when the voice reached them, it was absent of its usual warmth even as it repeated a familiar sentiment, “If it isn’t HG Wells.”

Pete strode out form the fire station where he had been volunteering over summer break. Claudia and Steve were out of his range of vision as Helena was the only one to stop in front of the open garage.

“Peter,” Helena felt a trill of excitement at seeing her friend as she turned, but his eyes were cold when she found them.

“Wow, I was sure I was seeing things. What are you doing back?” he demanded, “Let me guess, you heard Myka was finally happy and you came back to break her again?”

Helena blanched and Claudia stepped in to save her. “Whoa, Pete, chill.” She held her hands up.

“Claudia?” Pete’s face broke into a familiar boyish grin as he moved to gather the redhead up in a bear hug, “I missed you kid!” He put her back down as Steve came over and they exchanged a guy hug that had Claudia rolling her eyes.

“What are you guys doing here?” he laughed.

“I came to visit before school,” Jinks explained, “Claudia apparently had other plans…” he mumbled.

“I was trying to help HG and Myka.” Claudia told him.

“Help her how?” Pete’s voice lost some of its warmth as his eyes fell on the Englishwoman once more, “Help her break Myka’s heart again before she goes frolicking off into the sunset with her fiancé again when it’s no longer convenient for her to use her?”

HG’s anger was rekindled, “Do not speculate on things about which you know nothing!” She spat through her teeth, fire returning to her eyes, “Hurting Myka is the last thing I wanted to do.”

“Oh, is that why you left her without a word?” He challenged, “Left her crying in an airport? You know she didn’t leave her room for two weeks? You know how long it took for me just to get her to laugh without it sounding so broken? You think you can waltz back in here, after no word for months, after spending quality time with your _fiancé_ , and just expect Myka to come crawling back to you?”

He didn’t stop yelling, didn’t notice the tears that began building in Helena’s eyes even as she tried to hold on to her anger. In truth, she hadn’t thought much about how Myka had dealt with her absence. She didn’t know how big of an impact she’d had on the other woman’s life.

It was Claudia who stepped between them with a determined look on her face, “Whoa, Pete, chill, okay? You don’t know what HG has been going through in the last three months. It’s a lot bigger than one _ex-_ fiancé.” Claudia wasn’t sure how much to share with him, it was Helena’s story, not hers.

“I don’t want to hurt Myka,” Helena shook her head, “This was a horrid idea.” She repeated, only this time the words were saturated with sadness, “I only want to make things right with her, Peter. To explain, to apologize, but now…”

“She’s happy now, HG,” Pete’s eyes were pleading with her to understand what he was saying even as his face kept its stern set, “Trace and I helped Myka get back on her feet, and she has a boyfriend now, and he’s is a good guy. He treats her right and makes her smile.”

Helena’s heart ached, “Perhaps…”

She was going to say, _Perhaps I should leave then,_ but the thought of leaving her friends again, of leaving _Myka_ again was a physical pain she felt deep in her bones. What was she to do then? She couldn’t function if she lost more than she already had.

She had always been an extremely independent creature, self-reliant and self-sufficient since she was sixteen. The thought of actually needing someone genuinely terrified her. And she was loath to admit now, but she needed her friends if she had a hope of getting through the next eighteen months in one piece.

She closed her eyes, “I fucked up.”

Everyone looked at her to hear the word so harsh in her voice. She’d said it before, stubbing her toe, losing at Mario Cart, but it had never been uttered with such force before, such heat and fervor.

“I understand that,” She looked at Pete, and he seemed to see just how bent HG was over this, “I left. I didn’t call, or send a letter. In truth, I hoped she could be happy without me here, I hoped life could go on just fine for her. So I should not be surprised that it has, or hurt. _Least_ of all hurt. So I have no right to expect to get her back as we were before. But I would very much like to still be in her life, if at all possible.”

Pete huffed and ran his hands through his hair, it having grown shaggy, “Look, HG… I can be friends with you, I mean, I missed you too. But you can’t expect Myka to be as enthusiastic about it, okay? I won’t force a situation for you two to be together, but I also won’t stop you from trying to earn her trust back, because I know you meant a lot to each other.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem,” Steve spoke up and everyone looked at him, “Oh, did you guys not remember we were invited to go bowling by Kurt?”

“Wait,” Pete looked at each of them in turn, “You guys already went to see her?”

“Yeah,” Claudia nodded, “She’s… different…” she hadn’t decided yet if she liked this new Myka or not, so far all she had to go on was a new haircut and new clothes.

“And you guys met Kurt?” Something was bothering Pete, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. It wasn’t _quite_ a vibe, but he felt the suggestion of one wrap around him.

“Yes he was quite friendly,” Helena tried her damnedest to keep the bitterness from her tone, “He suggested, as Steven mentioned, that we all get together this evening for bowling. Wants to know all about _Bunny’s_ friends.”

“Wow, uh, wow.” Pete shook his head, trying to shake the feeling of wrongness slowly settling around him, “This is sure to be… interesting…”

“Why Peter, a three syllable word, I’m so proud,” HG tried to slip back into their old banter, she had missed it so.

Pete smirked, but didn’t respond. He felt himself slowly wanting to trust HG, though he had no reason to ever forgive her or talk to her, if not on his friends behest, then at least his own. Myka wasn’t the only one HG Wells had abandoned without word.

Part of Helena being in their lives felt right, though. He wanted to be angry, to push her away, but not too far. He wanted her in arms reach so she could be pulled back quickly. Something had clearly happened to her over summer, now that he _looked_ at the girl he could tell. She had the feeling of a person plagued with sleepless nights and stress filled days.

She looked like she needed a good long hug, maybe a cup of tea and about a week of nothing but old movies and laughter to even start making her feel better. Pete could at least justify to his pride giving her the first of those things.

He had missed her after all, despite all the shit she had put Myka’s heart through.

He gathered her into a hug at last and it he could feel her instant of surprise before she melted into the embrace. Pete could feel the weight on HG’s shoulders, and he made a mental note to ask her later what happened. Because his almost-vibe was telling him it was something big, and important, and he would need to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Bunny was Sam’s nickname for Myka, but I didn’t write that in in the Sam chapter, and I needed a stupid pet name for Myka to be called by Kurt, so bear with me.


	5. Date Night

“What the hell am I gonna do?” Myka demanded as she paced the length of her room wearing only her bra and panties.

“I don’t understand why you’re so nervous,” Tracy shook her head at her sister as she looked over the outfit Myka was trying to throw together in a frenzy, “I mean we’re just going to the Alley with your friends, what’s the bfd?”

“You don’t understand,” she shook her head before finally picking between two identical looking pairs of jeans, “I haven’t seen them in months, and I want them to know that I’m not the dorky nerd they left behind in California.”

“You were never a dorky nerd, sis,” Tracey shook her head, “You can be nerdy and dorky, yeah, but you’re also the chick who went from algebra tutor to dating the varsity quarter back. So just focus on that.”

Myka groaned, because that was part of the problem. She was the shy smart girl dating the shallow jock, it was one eighties montage short of being a cliché made for TV movie. She was annoyed to realize she still cared what HG thought of her.

“Look, what did I tell you, sis?” Tracy asked as she took over completing Myka’s outfit, “The key to looking good and making others jealous, is to immediately adopt the attitude of giving no fucks. You need to go through tonight and show them this new person you are.”

Myka frowned as she pulled the top on and her sister began focusing on accessories, “I’m more concerned that they won’t like the new me.”

“Well then they are morons,” Tracy smiled, “Because you’re great.”

“Thanks, Tracy,” Myka sighed.

She still felt like she was going to be sick, but at least now she had a plan, and pants on. She was going to show HG that she was totally over everything that didn’t really happen three months ago. Show her everything she had given up on when she got on that plane.

She was going to take her sisters advice and not care what Helena thought of her. As far as she was concerned, HG had given up the right to have a credible opinion regarding Myka.

She hid her anxiety under a layer of makeup and trendy clothes and rehearsed smiling in the mirror until it felt almost real.

* * *

Helena sat in a pile of her own clothes that she had torn form her suit case, “I have nothing to wear!” she complained to the room at large.

“I thought you were just going to be friends with Myka,” Steve called from where he lay on the bed, a book a few inches from his nose, “What does it matter what you wear?”

“What does it matter?” HG copied his voice a little too well, “Because, yes I want to be her friend, but I also want to show up that model of a boyfriend of hers while I’m trying to earn back her trust!”

“You’ve never had trouble getting ready for a party before,” Claudia commented, “In fact, if I remember, you are the one always working to give _me_ pointers. So what gives, roomie?”

“I’ve never cared what people thought of me before,” she admitted.

“I’ll help you out, don’t worry,” Claudia reassured her as she walked over, “Hey, isn’t this Myka’s?” she held up the forest green hoodie.

“No,” Helena blushed as she ripped it from Claudia’s hands.

“Really? Because it has her name on it.” Claudia poked her in the side.

“Oh shut it.” HG rolled her eyes.

“Alright,” Claudia laughed, “I see nothing. As long as you pay for my college, I can keep a few creepy secrets.”

“Er, right,” Helena’s body sagged once more, “About your tuition…” HG twiddled her thumbs and looked at her friend sadly.

“What?” Claudia paled, “Don’t tell me it didn’t go through and I have to wait another semester to go back to school. Please, HG, I’m gonna go fracking stir crazy. Have you ever seen The Shining? Now imagine if he had _my_ IQ…”

“No, no,” HG shook her head, “Claudia, I am so sorry, some unforeseen expenses have come up and I couldn’t afford your tuition this year. But don’t worry!” Her hands shot up when Claudia slowly sank into the arm chair, “I’ve procured you several scholarships so that you may continue your schooling, at least for another year.”

Claudia breathed a sigh of relief and thought quietly for a moment, there was something she wanted to ask, but HG hadn’t offered up the information willingly, so she asked the other question nagging at her instead, “You didn’t, like, steal these scholarships, did you? Or, you didn’t lie to get them? Because I’m trying to earn some good karma points in life and that would really set me back.”

“No, no, of course not,” Helena shook her head, “I told only the truth. You deserve these scholarships, and you deserve to go to school. God only knows what would happen to the world if you were left unentertained for even a moment. I leave you alone for three months and what did you do?”

“Watched everything on Netflix?” Steve offered from the bed, “Built four new Teslas from scratch, had a boyfriend, devised a plan to hook up her real life OTP- whatever that is- which thus far has failed terribly?”

“Thanks, Jinks,” Claudia threw a pillow at him, “You’re such a pal.”

* * *

Ralph’s Lanes, _Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex_. But that was a mouthful, so the locals just called it The Alley. It was the default hang out after school for high school students, but also catered to the college and young adult crowd. Bar, kitchen, sitting room and rental counter up front, twenty lanes and an arcade in the back.

And when it was at its busiest hour, there was a bouncer who had to turn people away.

Luckily Kurt had a standing arrangement with The Alley’s owner, Kacey Ralph, which allowed him to bowl there with his friends every Sunday, Wednesday and Friday evening. So when he, Myka and Tracy arrived, they bypassed the line and told Marco that they were expecting a few more people to join them soon.

Kurt didn’t seem to notice his girlfriend’s anxiety issues as he went from person to person in the sitting room, greeting people he recognized, laughing with old friends, keeping Myka on his arm the whole time as Tracy ventured off for a bit.

It was so loud with the sounds of talking, crashing pins and arcade games that Myka was sure she didn’t hear her. The overwhelming scent of nachos and wings meant she could smell the other woman’s shampoo as she had done in the bookstore. The dimmed lights and having her back to the door prevented her from seeing Helena right away. So she isn’t sure how she knew when the others arrived.

It began as an itch, just below the surface of her skin, and her heart began to thump in her chest. She was wiggling in place when Kurt’s old teammate, Trent, who they had stopped to talk to as he ate, looked behind Myka for a brief moment, and did a double take.

Myka looked over her shoulder and froze.

Helena had stopped walking, falling behind Claudia and Steve slightly, causing Pete and his date, an old girlfriend named Amanda, to nearly crash into her. She should have apologized, but found herself trapped by the piercing gaze that belonged to Myka.

Helena wondered if her heart would ever _not_ react violently at the sight of Myka, part of her sincerely hoped not. Myka, even when caught off guard was beautiful. HG vehemently wished she could go to her now and kiss her as she should have done the first moment they met, But her boyfriend was pulled close to her side, and the jocks behind them were raking their eyes slowly over HG as if she couldn’t see them.

“Who are they?” Trent asked of the three in the group he did not recognize, but his eyes stayed trained on the gorgeous raven haired woman looking over at them now.

“They’re Myka’s friends from school,” Kurt explained and Trent looked shocked, as if that concept was unheard of. As if she couldn’t have friends of her own that didn’t belong first to Kurt. Because they were friends with Pete and Tracy, they knew Myka, but had never known her to have very many friends, especially not like _that_ one.

Kurt caught Trent’s questioning stare and he grinned, “Yeah I know.”

Myka rolled her eyes, she wished sometimes that Kurt was less of guy around his friends. At least she wished they would stop checking out girls while she stood right there.

Kurt dragged Myka over to say hello to her lost looking friends.

“Hey guys, it’s good to see you again! Lattimister!” Kurt shouted with a grin when they approached, “What’s up, guy? Are you ready to get your ass whooped tonight, or what?”

“Yeah, yeah, Smoller,” Pete rolled his eyes, “We’ll see whether or not you’ve learned to bowl straight since last time.”

“Ouch that hurts,” he laughed, “I’m gonna go reserve us a lane.” He smacked Pete on the shoulder before walking away, still stopping every few feet to chat people up.

Amanda saved Myka from having to say anything to the heavy silence left behind by her boyfriend’s departure.

“Mykes,” she grabbed her elbow, “Do you mind if I speak to you for a moment?”

“Uh, sure.” She stammered, allowing herself to be dragged away once more.

Helena’s arms crossed over her chest as she kept her eyes on Kurt’s trek through the throngs of people. “ _The Petester? Lattimister?”_ Her faux American accent made Claudia snort, “Those are ridiculous, even as far as nicknames go, and not very creative, I might add.”

“Are you critiquing Kurt’s nicknames of me because they bother you?” Pete quirked an eye brow at her, “Or are you jealous of my friendship?”

HG scoffed, “Don’t be absurd.” She rolled her eyes, but all four of them caught the light blush.

“Aw, that’s so sweet.” Pete claimed in a sing song voice.

A girl approached them then, about Claudia’s age, but with straight dark hair and green eyes that while were familiar, were lacking _something_ that HG couldn’t put her finger on.

“Hey, Petey,” She smiled but let her eyes trail over the other three.

“Fantastic, another nick name,” HG mumbled too low for anyone but Claudia to hear, and the red head coughed to cover up the sputtered laugh.

“Hey, Trace, let me introduce you to my friends,” He smiled, almost proudly, “This is Steve Jinks, Claudia Donavan and HG Wells. This is Tracy.”

“HG Wells?” Trace tilted her head, she was almost positive that HG Wells was some old author her father and sister were obsessed with.

“Helena, actually,” HG shrugged, “My parents had a sense of humor that my friends apparently share. You may call me Helena or HG, which ever you prefer.”

“Cool,” She nodded, “I love your boots, by the way. Where did you get them?”

“Hm?” she glanced down at her feet, “Oh, I picked them up in London.”

Pete rolled his eyes as they began to talk animatedly about different accessories and clothing items. Claudia was silently communicating with her best friend who still had a worried look on his face.

“So how did you become friends with Pete?” Tracy asked, “Because, I mean, come on, he’s _Pete._ Oh God, you didn’t date him did you? _”_

“Hey, hey, hey,” Pete interjected, “I think I resent that!”

Helena laughed, “Heavens no, I met him through another friend of ours, Myka. How did you know Peter? Are _you_ one of his girlfriends?”

“No, no, no,” Tracy shook her head, “No. I also met him through Myka. She’s my sister.”

It dawned on HG then, “ _Tracy._ Right, Myka’s little sister. I’ve actually heard quite a bit about you.” Helena smiled, though didn’t mention that it wasn’t usually good things she heard.

Myka and Amanda returned then, Amanda having finished venting to Myka about her conflicting feelings for Pete. On the one hand, they had history and she liked being with him, but on the other, they had a messy break up and she didn’t know where they stood. Myka told her, as she ignored the fact that she wasn’t really in any sort of position to be giving advice, it was Pete she really should be talking to.

She looked questioningly between her sister and HG, trying to figure out why they looked as if they had been smiling as they watched her approach,

“Mykes,” Tracy shook her head, false sternness in her voice, “Why didn’t you _tell_ me you actually had _cool_ friends?” she gestured to HG.

So Myka hadn’t mentioned HG to her then. Fantastic. That only hurt a whole hell of a lot. But HG hid it well behind a trademark smirk.

Myka was stuck trying to process Helena and Tracy getting along. She had only been gone for five minutes, how had they become so chummy? Helena was rather charming, she supposed, but she didn’t’ understand why this was bothering her so much.

“Hey!” Kurt’s voice broke the slowly building tension between Myka and HG, “We’ve got lane 13 opened up for us! Let’s go!”

The eight young adults formed two teams. Steve, Claudia, HG and Pete against Myka, Kurt, Tracy and Amanda. But what it really was, was Kurt against Pete. Amanda and Tracy were fair while Myka’s grace did not extend to this particular sport. Steve wasn’t really trying, but he hit his fair share of pins. Claudia and HG, once they got the hang of it were getting more strikes than anyone else, though they collectively began to throw the game when Kurt grew frustrated. They would rather have fun and lose than listen to Kurt say it wasn’t fair.

There was a pile of fries in the middle of the table, and drinks for those of drinking age, but no one save Pete and Kurt seemed to have an appitite.

Small talk and jibes were exchanged. Very light and easy. Except between the two people who should probably be talking the most. Myka and HG didn’t address one another specifically, something that didn’t go unnoticed by each. But Tracy and Amanda helped fill in the silence left between Kurt asking them each questions.

 “So HG,” Kurt said around a mouthful of fries, “How did you end up in Fairview* for college, of all places?”

HG swallowed her disgust. It was one thing when Pete shoveled food into his mouth and spoke, because she actually _liked_ Pete. But the longer she was around Kurt, the less she could stand him.

“Well,” She cleared her throat and crossed her legs at the knee, “I’m studying Engineering, and they have the most amazing science department. But what really sold me was their writing and literature classes.”

“Oh so you want to be a writer?” Kurt nodded.

HG tried not to roll her eyes, as if a woman wasn’t seriously looking into going into the field of Engineering.

“While I _am_ rather good with my hands,” she winked at Myka, causing the other woman to look away quickly, “I am afraid that inventing is more my forte,” HG gave a humble smile, “Besides, I couldn’t hope to compete with Myka. She’s quite the talented writer. I’m positive that she has absolutely ruined her teachers for all else.”

It was the most earnest thing Myka had heard out of Helena’s mouth all night, and she found herself blushing despite herself, glancing up once more into those chocolate brown eyes, a small smile pulling at the edge of her lips when she found HG smiling at her already.

“You never told me you were a writer, Bunny,” She found Kurt smiling as well, but it was rather patronizing, “What do you write about?”

Now Myka’s face flushed for a very different reason, suddenly very self-conscious. “I _was_ working on a science fiction novel, but I actually haven’t written in a few months.”

“That’s cool,” Kurt nodded, “What was it about?” his attention was already waning and he was now only killing time until it was his turn again.

“Oh you know,” she shrugged but gave a sly smile to her friends. “This secret service agent who goes on dangerous missions, gathering dangerous objects with her team.”

Steve, Claudia and Pete smiled hugely, but Kurt didn’t understand what the big deal was. But, then again, books weren’t really his thing, and science fiction wasn’t his favorite genre.

“I think that’s wonderful,” Helena said, perfectly aware of how disinterested Kurt was, and how much this meant to Myka, “I do hope you continue to write, darling. You really are a magnificent author.”

Myka got up for her turn, glad she had an excuse to turn away from Helena. This wasn’t going like it was supposed to. She was supposed to be flippant and nonchalant, why did she still feel pain in her chest that Helena was being so…. Whatever she was being when she complemented Myka so easily. It was confusing and frustrating.

She threw a gutter ball and Kurt complained at her loudly. She refused to look up as she waited for her ball to return, her ears hot has she grew embarrassed. Kurt made a joke, too low for her to hear at this distance, but Tracy snorted. She suddenly wished she was anywhere else but here, this had been a bad idea. She knew she wasn’t good at bowling, she was trying to look cool in front of her friends, in front of Helena, and she was failing miserably.

She walked back to the top of the lane and stopped, she could feel everyone’s eyes on her neck and she began to feel anxious. Hands reached around her and grabbed her wrists, a slim body pressed firmly against her back.

“Like this,” she heard Helena’s voice inches from her ear and she gulped, her heart pounding double time in her chest.

HG moved with Myka, and when the ball went down the lane, it hit the center pin and she got a perfect strike. Her boyfriend cheered behind her while Pete complained that HG was helping the other team, but Myka didn’t hear any of it, couldn’t above the sound of blood rushing in her ears.

HG released her, leaving Myka feeling cold, but allowing reason to flood back in to her mind. Looking now into Helena’s eyes she had to force herself to remember that she was mad at her. Helena had broken Myka’s heart, then showed up out of the blue when she was finally adjusting just to throw a wrench into it.

How had she let herself forget for even a minute that Helena had left her, had gone off with her fiancé and left her without a word.

“Can I talk to you for a minute, HG?” Myka was getting exhausted of playing nice and listening to HG go on like nothing ever happened between them.

“Of course, darling,” She took another step back, “Claudia, feel free to bowl for me if I’m not back for my turn.”

Myka grabbed HG’s hand and pulled her away from the lane, not releasing her hand until they were in the arcade. Claudia and Steve exchanged a look that Pete and Tracy caught but chose not to comment.

It wasn’t deserted, or quiet, but now they were away from the others and could drop the charade they had been clinging to so tightly that night. HG could see all the hurt and anger in Myka’s face as the other woman crossed her arms over her chest and glared.

“What are you doing, HG?” she demanded, and Helena wished she would call her by her name as she always had done before.

But she could see this wasn’t the same person as before. She had seen her talk to her friends, and the others in the bowling alley, she was confident, but her smiles were less genuine. She brushed things off and the only thing that seemed to bother her the whole night, aside from HG, was when Kurt had made a joke about her and Helena had to work not to punch him in the face.

Long gone was the girl who needed reassurance in a hotel room that Helena really wanted to be friends with her. She was replaced by a cold, aloof woman.

And though Myka would always be the most amazing person Helena had ever known, she was… different. She wasn’t _her_ Myka anymore. Though, HG supposed, Myka never really was _her_ anything. But she couldn’t stop fighting to be with Myka. If she stopped fighting for that, her fight for everything else in life would also be over.

“I’m trying to be your friend, Myka,” she said, hiding her panic and anxiety behind an eye roll, “As I always have done, but your _boyfriend_ is making civility rather difficult… and I used to think _Pete_ was insufferable…” she mumbled, “And it’s hard to be friendly with you when you choose to ignore me the whole night.”

“Don’t,” Myka warned, “Don’t put this on me, Helena. You are the one who left me to go back to your life in London, you have no right to just expect everything to go back to how it was before. It can’t go back to how it was before.”

“I want us to be friends Myka,” she felt her mask slipping as she grew desperate. Myka was going to send her away, she just knew it, she had to stop her somehow, “I mean, we were quite close, were we not? I’d like to have that gain, if nothing else. Please.” Her voice broke on the please and Myka felt herself begin to sway.

Was it so impossible to be friends with Helena again?

 _It is if she leaves again,_ a small voice warned, _then you would be completely broken again with no one to blame but yourself._

HG sensed her hesitation, “I’m back, darling. For good this time. Believe me, there is very little I want more than to never return to London again.”

“And what about your fiancé?” Myka challenged, unable to keep the bitterness form her tone,

“My _ex_ -fiancé.” Helena corrected with a grimace, “I want to tell you that story. I _need_ to tell you that story. You more than anyone else. But I’m afraid that conversation is for a more private setting.” She looked pointedly at the teenaged boys that were trying to appear as if they were not eves dropping on their conversation.

“Fine,” Myka grumbled, “But you will tell me.” She insisted.

“Of course,” Helena made the figure of an X over her heart.

There was a moment of suspended silence between the two women. Each having so much to say, but neither willing to open up just quite yet.

So Helena stuck her hand out, “Friends?” she asked, with so much hope in her voice, her mask broke for one second and Myka could see the despair lingering in her tired eyes.

“Friends.” Myka agreed and accepted HG’s hand.

Just like the first time their palms touched there was a moment of electricity followed by warmth. But neither gave that away to the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Colorado Springs is a real place I did not look into, I made up the places they visit there, including Ralph’s Lanes, also called The Alley by locals, the interior is based on the bowling alley in my home town that I haven’t been to since my third year of high school. And for Fairview CA, I realize I never gave a college name or township for their school, so IDK if Fairview is a real place or not, but that’s the made up town


	6. Turbulence

The four days that followed echoed loudly with a melodic symphony of words unsaid and laughter that escaped from deep within people, for whom it had been much too long.

Kurt found himself upset with his girlfriend. A new feeling, because she had always been so willing to go along with anything he wanted to do before, now she didn’t. They had planned to spend the remainder of their break together, but Myka’s friend’s ended up spending every day with her.

For the five friends, despite the awkwardness, it was the first time in months that they felt _good_.

On Monday, they, including Tracy, Amanda and Kurt, spent the afternoon to early evening in the mall.

Claudia worked to make HG smile as much as possible, the dark cloud hanging over her friend worrying her. So she tried on ridiculous outfits, provided ludicrous back stories for cashiers and shoppers, and made rude jokes. But she didn’t begin to smile genuinely until the tension between HG and Myka broke with the help of Starbucks.

Myka took a sip of her complicated drink and ended up with a dollop of whipped cream on her nose. Helena giggled and Myka blushed deeply as she invaded her personal space to wipe it carefully away.

“Really, darling,” Helena smiled ruefully, “You look beautiful in anything, but the cream is giving me some wildly inappropriate thoughts.”

Before Myka had a chance to respond, Helena had turned on her heel, distracted once more by something in a shop window. Myka swallowed thickly and ignored the questioning gazes from the other three girls.

While Myka, HG, Claudia, Tracy and Amanda paraded with arms full of shopping bags through the mall, Kurt, Pete and Steve sat in the food court. Kurt mostly glanced at his watch while Pete and Steve laughed at their own snide commentary on the fellow mall goers.

Tracy carefully studied her sister, noticing the jokes and stories and laughs she shared with her two friends. What really kept her interest was the longing gazes Helena would give Myka when she wasn’t looking. It was so painful to watch her pull on a happy mask when the others turned to her. And the way Myka seemed so nervous around HG, and yet, more at ease than she had seen her in months.

 _Interesting_ , she thought to herself.

On Tuesday, Claudia plead with Myka to take her to the zoo.

Myka couldn’t deny the younger girl when she learned that Claudia had never visited a zoo before. Helena and Steve tagged along with them. Pete opted out, trying to get more hours in volunteering at the fire department and with Amanda before they had to return to California on Friday.

Kurt was upset that Myka had changed her plans with him again simply because the little computer nerd wanted to fawn over a bunch of animals and Myka couldn’t say no. He refused to go with Myka and her friends, choosing to spend the day with his own friends instead. He turned his phone off, thinking that ignoring Myka for a few hours would be punishment enough, and she wouldn’t put him off again.

But Myka was too busy to think about Kurt. Watching Claudia jump up and down in excitement like a little kid when a penguin waddled to the glass window where she stood and honked at her. Watching Steve look at the big cats’ exhibit with an awe struck smile. Watching Helena stare wistfully at the children running around, squealing in excitement.

Even more distracted when they finally came upon the giraffes.

Helena smiled at the wonderment in Myka’s eyes when they visited the huge animals. Myka squealed when the juvenile giraffe clopped closer to the gate and stared down at her, looking for handouts.

When Myka heard Helena’s giggle, she faced her with a blush, “What?”

“I have never seen some one get quite so excited over a wild animal,” she explained with a smile, “It’s quite adorable.”

“Well,” Myka cast her eyes down as she scuffed her shoes on the cobble stone path, “Giraffes are my favorite animal.”

Myka explained that her height made her awkward in her youth. So she had identified with a stumbling baby giraffe she had seen. Since then, she had become obsessed. Learning everything she could about them.

HG got lost in her own thoughts for a moment, couldn’t help but to imagine what it would be like to have Christina here with them now, listening to Myka gush over the animals before them. If the much abused stuffed animal the girl carried with her was any indication, she also favored the tall mammals.

Myka mistook Helena’s silence for judgment and her gaze turned challenging, “Well, then? What’s your favorite animal?”

Helena shifted uncomfortably, taken off guard. No one had ever asked her what her favorite animal was before. She found herself both wanting to share, and embarrassed to share. She covered up her hesitation with a trademark smirk and eye roll, “Unicorns. But I do believe that this zoo has not yet completed their unicorn habitat, so I am out of luck.”

Most of what HG said was cloaked in vanity and sarcasm, but Myka had learned to read the Englishwoman, and she could tell that Helena really had been serious about unicorns being her favorite animal.

Myka smiled, “Figures a mythical creature would be your favorite animal.”

“And just what is that supposed to mean?” HG demanded, but could sense the light tone Myka kept.

“Nothing, nothing at all.” Myka turned away, “Let’s go find where Steve and Claudia wandered off to.”

When they left the zoo, Myka noticed the head of a stuffed animal sticking its head out of a gift shop bag and raised an eyebrow at Helena.

“It’s a gift,” HG hurriedly explained, “For a friend,”

“Oh?” Myka smiled, “Anyone I know?”

“Not yet.” HG’s smile was tainted by sadness, and it made Myka insanely curious, but she didn’t push it.

“Hey,” she said as they pulled up to the hotel they were staying at, “Did you guys want to, I don’t know, do brunch with my parents tomorrow.” She rubbed the back of her neck, “They wanted to meet my friends…”

“I’d love to.” Helena smiled, anything to spend more time with Myka by this point.

“Um,” Claudia shot Steve a look, “Steve and I sort of promised we would go meet Pete’s mom tomorrow…”

Jinks had to fight not to recoil in the presence of such a bold faced lie, but he knew what Claudia was doing, “Yeah, but HG, you should totally go.”

Myka bit her lip, not seeing the brief panic sparked in HG’s eye.

“Sure,” Helena’s voice came out an octave higher than normal and she cleared her throat, “I mean, I would love to meet your parents.”

“Fantastic,” Myka smiled.

Kurt was annoyed to find out that Myka hadn’t called or texted him once all day. And when he arrived at her place that night, all she did was talk about what a fun day she’d had with her friends, and how HG was joining them the following day to eat out with her parents. She didn’t even notice his disinterest in the whole matter as he pouted on the edge of her bed.

In the early afternoon on Wednesday, Helena met Myka at her father’s golf club, where the members had a nice restaurant.

Helena had hardly slept the night before, her body soaked in anxiety about meeting Myka’s parents. She knew, on the one hand, as far as their eldest daughter went, they were not going to receive the parents of the year reward. But she found she still wanted them to like her. Parents had never been an issue for Helena in the past, but she had never honestly cared before.

She took a breath and turned on the charm as she met Warren and Jeannie Bering, who were sitting at a table with Tracy and Kurt.

Helena was less thrilled about seeing Kurt there, but she hid it well by largely ignoring his presence as he did her.

She was far more involved with the conversations that she was having with Warren on nineteenth century literature.

Warren was impressed with Myka’s friend, she was obviously bright and well-read and headed places. He wished all of Myka’s friends were like Helena. But so far, all he knew was Pete and Kurt, neither of them able to hold a conversation with Warren for long.

Jeannie found her very lovely and cultured. She was well spoken and had excellent manners, and was delighted to hear her speak about her studies, even though she didn’t understand most of the technical speak, she knew she was an aspiring scientist of some kind.

Tracy, already fond of Helena, liked her even more after they traded stories about all the different places they traveled, and places they would still like to see.

It made Myka smile to see her family take to HG so quickly. And it made Kurt extremely frustrated. HE was the one who was supposed to be charming Myka’s parents. And her HG was, stealing all their attention and praise while he stared gloomily at his food and checked out the waitress.

Claudia and Steve really did end up going to meet Jane Lattimer, both having grown uncomfortable with the lie they created.

She made them lunch and talked about Pete as a kid. Even broke out the album of embarrassingly adorable baby photos that had Pete protesting with a blush. They also learned that Pete’s father had been a firefighter who had died when Pete was a boy. He’d died a hero, saving a couple kids from a fire in an apartment building. It wasn’t the flames or the smoke that got him. He was hit in the head by a falling beam. And while he had walked out of the building, he died a few hours later from a brain hemorrhage.

Jane had to work to not give away how much she already knew about Pete’s friends. Mrs. Fredric had spoken to her about her son and his friends getting into a dangerous situation with artifacts, and she had done her research.

Despite their foolish behavior, she was glad to see her son had such good friends.

Claudia decided she liked Jane Lattimer. She radiated that bad assitude that Myka had too, and Claudia envied it a little. Steve was mostly glad that now he had ammunition to use against Pete, like having been kicked out of the boy scouts, and being duct taped to the flag pole in the third grade.

On Thursday, their last day in Colorado, everyone got together again to have a day of fun that consisted of going to the movies, dinner and visiting the large park. It was beautifully simple and nice.

Amanda sat on a swing while Pete pushed her softly, Steve watched as Claudia and HG played chess, while Myka continued to ignore Kurt’s heavy, bored sighs while she alternated between talking to Pete and talking to HG.

The only one that week who had not noticed the connection between Helena and Myka, aside from the two women, was Kurt. Everyone else noticed the small smiles, light touches exchanged without a second thought, the way the two gravitated toward each other every day.

But Helena still had yet to tell Myka about Christina or Nate. She knew she really needed to tell Myka, but she was procrastinating. Wanting to hold out for just a moment longer, until she was forced to admit that things had to change in her life. But it wasn’t like she had gotten a lot of time _alone_ with Myka. There was always some crowd, or Kurt, close by to use as an excuse to stay quiet.

Friday morning came too soon for some, and not soon enough for others.

Amanda and Pete had spent the entire night talking. Despite their messy break up two years prior, they found themselves inexplicably drawn to each other. They knew the statistics for long distance relationships in college, but reality seemed to suspend when they shared one last, tearful, heated good bye kiss at the airport. Skype dates and phone calls and weekend visits were promised between whispered declarations.

While one couple’s love seemed to be blossoming, another was being dragged violently over the rocks as Myka and Kurt had another non-fight on the car ride to the airport.

“You act differently with your friends around, Bunny,” Kurt claimed, “Not like yourself at all. All you wanted to do all week was go out with them, you didn’t want to spend any time with me at all! It’s like you don’t want to be with me anymore.”

Myka didn’t know how to respond, so she just looked out the window. Did she want to be with Kurt? She thought she did, but this week, he had felt more like a burden than a blessing. Which wasn’t fair to Kurt, since he had been there when Myka’s heart was shattered.

“I don’t know how this is supposed to work while we’re apart,” Kurt continued speaking, not needing Myka’s input to carry on, “But I would really like to make the whole long distance thing work, ya know? Phone calls and weekend visits? I think we can do it, Bunny. But only if you start focusing again on _us_.”

“Okay, Kurt.” Myka found herself nodding, “I’ll try.”

Their kiss was rather chaste, more so than Kurt was used to, and he found himself frustrated again by his distracted girlfriend, but didn’t say anything as she walked off alone to her gate.

On the Plane, Steve and Claudia sat together with Pete across the aisle. Three rows back Myka found her seat, groaning inwardly when she found who was sitting in the seat beside hers.

Helena had a thumbnail trapped between her teeth while her feet giggled up and down. She looked extremely nervous.

“Are you okay?” Myka asked softly as she sat in the aisle seat.

“Oh, Myka,” Helena whipped her head around, “Is this your seat? Aces. Hm? Yes I’m fine, I just am not a great flyer, I suppose. I know how planes work, how they stay in the air. I could probably fly the thing.” She flipped her hair, part of her bravado returning, “But my logical brain often loses in flight.”

“Oh,” Myka nodded, “Well, do you want to switch seats?” she offered.

“Please?” HG’s voice cracked slightly, she hated the window seat.

Once settled once more, HG began to tap her foot again and chew her nail. Myka pulled out her book that she had brought for the flight. Seeing it, discussing its author, helped distract HG from the situation. But when the plane began its bumpy assent, HG gripped the arm rests tightly, pushing her head back and tightly closing her eyes.

Without thinking too long on it, Myks smoothed out Helena’s hand, holding it in her own. Helena stared down in shock at their conjoined hands, but found Myka foused intently on the book in her lap.

HG smiled at the small act of friendship, of comfort.

It gave her hope.


	7. Home Again

Just setting foot back in to their old apartment felt like a home coming for Myka. She knew every inch of the space, could walk it blind folded. She knew the different tricks and qualities, like the fact that Pete’s window stuck and needed two people to open and close. Or that Myka’s shower had two settings, flames of hell and arctic winter.

She was thrilled when she called her old land lord and she informed Myka that no one had rented out the apartment since they left, and she was happy to have the three back. Aside from a few noise complaints, they were perfect tenants, something she hadn’t expected from three college students.

Everything was put back in its proper place. And for a moment, Myka just sat at her desk. Curtains drawn, overhead light off, desk lap on. It probably wasn’t the best for her already admittedly terrible eye sight, but she preferred to sit like this when she wrote. Not that she was doing much writing.

She was mostly staring at the manuscript she had stopped working on. She read through it with the excuse that it needed editing. Really, she wanted to remember. Being back in the old apartment, all her things placed exactly as they had been before, Steve and Pete both down the hall from her.

Colorado had been god for her. Had she stayed here, she wasn’t sure what she would have done. Thrown herself into _something_ , surely. She had been social, she had laughed and had a good time. But it had always felt like it was missing something. It echoed hollowly in her. She hadn’t felt that before.

Now, she wanted to feel like she did before summer. She wanted to remember a time when smiles weren’t forced and laughter came easily. A time she felt happy, and content, and alive. Not the hollow husk she had become with a painted on grin and a string that repeated the same phrases when pulled.

 So she opened the box that had lived under her bed for the last three months.

First out was the H.G. Wells book she procured from her father’s store. She let her fingers run over the cover, trace the looped penning on the title page, before carefully setting it aside. She had a plan for that book, a vague one. She wanted Helena to have it, bu she wasn’t sure how to give it to the other woman. They had exchanged books in the past, but that was _before._ And it wasn’t for a weekend, and it wasn’t some fiftieth anniversary reprint. It was a signed first edition, and she wanted Helena to have it because the book had meant so much to her.

* * *

_“Sometimes,” Helena spoke softly, “I think for a long time about this damned book.”_

_It was one of their many coffee dates at Leena’s, and they had gotten on the subject of the author who was her name sake. Myka was preferential to War of the Worlds, Helena insisted /When the Sleeper Wakes/ was the best piece of fiction written by her ancestor._

_Helena had looked at her half-empty cup of tea for a few moments, thinking of how to word what she wanted Myka to understand. “Sometimes, I wish I could be like Graham. Go to sleep and wake up hundreds of years in the future to a different place. But, in my version at least, things have gotten better.”_

_There was an ache in Helena that Myka could feel across the booth, and she found herself moving to sit beside her, placing her hand on top of Helena’s. She didn’t speak, simply held her hand for a moment and smiled at her._

* * *

Myka sighed lifted the next thing from the box, a small stack of three by five photos.

Myka and Helena lying on the beach, both soaking from the water battle, both smiling hugely at the camera in Claudia’s hands.

A candid shot by Leena as Myka and Helena took up their normal booth in her diner. Leena had snapped it because their auras had looked so beautiful intertwining with one another, and though you couldn’t see the vibrant colors in the photograph, you could see something equally as beautiful on the faces of the women gazing into one another’s eyes. She’d slipped the print to Myka a few days later.

Myka stared at it for a moment now. The way she and Helena had both leaned over the table toward each other. The brightness in their eyes and the flush of their cheeks. Helena had been speaking and Myka was listening to her intently, bottom lip trapped between her teeth.

The last photo was also snapped by Claudia. It had been a movie night at Myka’s apartment, and the two women had fallen asleep during a Monty Python movie. They ended up cuddling on the couch under the blanket, and it was the cutest thing the young redhead had ever seen. It was Myka’s favorite.

The grappling hook came next. It was very steam punkish, and if Myka didn’t have first-hand knowledge of its authenticity, she would have thought it was just a prop. She remembered now, the case of Godfreiy’s spoon, of Helena saving her when a car was moments from flattening her. The feel of their bodies pressed tightly together as they flew through the air to safety.

Helena had left it on her book shelf a few weeks after returning from spring break. Myka had poked fun at it a little at the time to ease the panic she felt from nearly dying, but she could appreciate the talent HG had to have in order to make such a thing. So when she found it in her room after Claudia and Helena had gone home for the night she felt the butterflies to full riot in her stomach.

It still had the yellow post-it note adhered to it. Myka traced the simple script in the short note with her finger, _Keep it, you can owe me._

Perhaps this was the excuse she could use to give the book to Helena.

Finally, Myka flipped through the manuscript. Reading the alternate version of her own life was weird, even weirder to think she wrote it. It felt like another life time now, these amazing adventures someone else’s. It didn’t help that she hadn’t had anyone sharing bed space with her in three months, whispering about their amazing spring adventure into the early hours of the morning. It felt less real now, and she found herself wishing for someone to talk to.

She rose from her desk, not putting the things back in the box, they had been boxed up for far too long.

She didn’t realize where she was going until she heard the familiar chime sounding overhead, the familiar scent of old paper wrapping around her, the warm welcoming feeling that this book store provided.

“As I live and breathe,” Abigale smiled behind the counter of The Red Couch, “If it isn’t Myka Bering gracing my store with her presence.”

“Hey, Dr. Cho,” Myka waved shyly.

It felt odd returning to the bookstore after so long. The separation of her and her boss left Myka feeling slightly disconnected.

“I’ve told you a hundred times, Myka,” the doctor chided, “Call me Abigale.”

“Right, Abigale.” Myka nodded as she slowly approached the counter she had spent countless hours behind in years prior.

“What brings you around, Myka?” Abigale studied her young friend closely, “Please tell me you are looking for a job, because seriously, I could use the help around here. The store has gone to hell.”

“Actually, yeah,” Myka smiled, “I would like to beg for my job back.”

“Not necessary,” Abigale waved it off, “I wouldn’t dream of hiring anyone else. No one could follow the system we’ve set up anyway.” She winked.

Myka sighed in relief, “Thanks Abigale.”

The doctor could sense that there was something else bothering Myka. While she had obviously had a make-over during the summer months, her internal issues seemed to be running rampant. Myka had never spoken to Dr. Cho the way other students did, never seeking help. But that didn’t mean the woman’s boss hadn’t picked up on a few things on her own.

And now, Myka’s gaze was mostly down cast, shoulders hunched forward slightly. She was clearly trapped under the weight of something.

“You know, Myka,” Abigale’s tone was soft, “You can always talk to me. If anything is bothering you. You can trust me.”

Myka seemed to consider it for a long time, and Abigale was sure she was going to turn down her offer, but she was wrong.

“Actually, could I?” Myka’s eyes were full of confusion and pain as she met her gaze, “I can’t understand what’s going on in my own mind lately, and I feel like if I don’t talk to someone about it, I’m going to go crazy.”

“What about your friend?” Abigale asked, “The one who used to walk you to work, Ms. Wells?”

Myka shrugged, “It sorta involves her.”

“I feel like we need to have tea with this conversation, don’t you?” Abigale smiled and lead her to her office, where Myka poured out her heart all the weirdness she was feeling, from the first time Myka saw HG to their reunion in Colorado, glossing over the curiosities they collected.

And just getting all the things off her chest that she didn’t understand was a big relief. Just having someone listen to her crazy who wasn’t directly involved. Dr. Cho didn’t push her, only asked polite questions, no head shrinking, handed her tissues when the tears came, and tried to figure out the best way to tell her she probably shouldn’t be with that boyfriend of hers.

Not only was Kurt Smoller clearly wrong for her, it wasn’t okay to keep him around simply because it was easier for Myka to be with him than to be alone.

But before she could think of how to word it, Myka realized the time and insisted she needed to be going home, promising to be back tomorrow for her shift. So Abigale would hold her tongue… for now at least.

* * *

Claudia found that it felt weird moving back into the space she shared with HG.

Helena had worked her charms on the administration and dormitory advisors so that she and Claudia were once again roommates on the tenth floor of the building.

She had looked forward to being roommates with the other engineering student, had missed her greatly when they were apart for the summer. But now, even while Claudia was finishing up her side of the room, Helena stood next to her bed, staring.

Her boxes of tools and books were lined on the wall. Her bags of clothes and toiletries sat unopened on her bed. She hadn’t spoken a word since they arrived at their home, and Claudia was growing worried.

Helena was staring vacantly at her bag of tools that she used for repairs, her hands fisting and releasing sporadically. She was so lost in thought, it took Claudia shouting her name three times for her to react.

“I’m sorry?” Helena’s voice sounded… off.

“I asked if you were gonna set your side of the room up or not?” Claudia spoke slowly, watching for something to spark in her friend’s eyes, but there was nothing there.

“Perhaps a bit later,” HG moved toward the door, “I need to… I need to go, I’ll be back in a few hours.”

“Okay?” Claudia said to the door that was already closing on Helena’s departure.

Claudia felt nauseous as she looked at her friends still packed things. She was afraid of what it meant that HG wasn’t unpacking. Though the Brit claimed she was back for certain, Claudia was still wary that she wasn’t really _here_.

Helena walked with her head down. It was a few miles to her destination, but she didn’t mind the trip. Despite the heat, it felt good to feel the sun on her skin. The open air helped clear her head so that she could think clearly. Well, as clearly as possible under the stress of the situation she had found herself in.

A sense of a warm welcome wrapped around her as she stepped through the door if Leena’s Coffee. And as soon as the proprietor of the establishment noticed her presence, the older woman smiled hugely and rushed around the bar to envelop HG in a hug.

“HG!” Leena laughed as she pulled back, “I’ve missed you… whoa, what’s up with your aura?”

“My what?” Helena asked, taken aback.

“Your…” Leena made a vague gesture around Helena’s body before remembering this wasn’t something she normally talked about, “Sorry, Psych major, the, um, vibes your putting out… is there something wrong? Here come sit, have a cup of tea.”

HG allowed her to be lead to the counter, “I didn’t know you were attending university.”

“Night classes mostly,” Leena nodded, “I’m not really going after a degree, I just am really interested in people, and how they work.”

“Ah,” HG twiddled her thumbs, seeming to hold back confiding in the woman who had inexplicably wound her way into HG’s life and become her friend in the last semester.

“Are you in love?” Leena asked as soon as the tea was set in front of her with no preamble whatsoever.

Helena panicked, unsure of how to answer, so her brain retreated to her memory of how others have responded to this question, “Out.”

“Out of love?” Leena was too worried about her friend to realize what she was doing at first.

“Out of her favor,” Helena sighed dramatically, “Where I am in love.”

Leena glared at her, “I like William Shakespeare just fine, but I would prefer to hear from HG Wells.”

“You cannot imagine,” Helena began with a faux somber tone, “The craving for rest that I feel- a hunger and thirst. For six long days, since my work was done, my mind has been a whirlpool, swift, unprogressive and incessant, a torrent of thoughts leading nowhere, spinning round swift and steady…” she trailed off when she saw Leena’s death glare.

“I will hit you, you know.” She warned.

“You said H.G. Wells…” Helena tried weakly.

“You know very well I meant you, _Helena_.” Leena grumbled.

“Fine, fine,” HG nodded, not telling her how true those statements she spoke were to her current situation, instead she focused on another problem, having successfully distracted Leena away from her love life for the moment, “I admit I am having trouble in an area of my life I am unused to.”

“What is it?” Leena asked, “Maybe I can help?”

“It’s a money issue,” Helena shook her head, feeling rather embarrassed about it, “Or, lack thereof. I have managed to exhaust most of my income this summer, and I am afraid I don’t know how I am going to support… myself on mine and Claudia’s repair business alone.”

 “That’s simple enough,” Leena shook her head, “Come work a few shifts here.”

“Really?” Helena perked up, “I don’t really have any experience working in a diner…”

“That’s okay,” Leena waved her off, “You can’t be any worse than Meghan, and I could use the help since I fired her.”

Helena smiled fighting tears, “Thank you, Leena. Really, this would help me a lot.”

“It’s no problem, HG,” Leena smiled, “Now, about your love life…” she rose an eyebrow.

“That’s… rather complicated at the moment I’m afraid.” Helena traced phantom patterns on the countertop.

“I don’t understand how complicated it can be,” Leena argued, “If you love someone, and they love you, then that should be it.”

“That should be it, but it gets all… messy.” HG sighed, “Past transgressions come round to bite you in the ass, people lie, and they leave and it all just gets so messed up.”

“You can talk to me, Helena,” Leena spoke softly, “Not as your boss or some crack pot psychology major, but as a friend. You can talk to me. Tell me what happened.”

Helena opened her mouth but the buzzing from her pocket saved her from having to divulge further. She looked down at the screen, “You’ll have to excuse me, Leena. I must go see a woman about an apartment in town.” She mumbled as she hopped down from the stool.

“Okay,” Leena would let it go for now, “Just… come in tomorrow with a copy of your schedule for the semester and we’ll see about setting you up for training and some shifts.”

“Alright,” Helena nodded, “Thank you for the tea, and… everything.” She avoided eye contact once more and Leena just smiled.

She watched the murky colors swimming around her friend and sighed as she left. There was something there, some worry eating away at her heart. Leena had seen HG’s colors change a lot. She had seen them be neutral, passive almost, about everything around her. She had seen them be bright and electric when she was with Myka. Now, there was mostly a darkness about her, few sparks of light, but they were slowly being over taken.

Leena was determined to help her however she could.


	8. The Heart of a Sixteen Year Old

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy back story Batman!

Myka was sitting in an arm chair in a back corner of The Red Couch when her phone rang. She had gone to the store with the intention of working, but had stumbled on a book. It was old, obviously well loved, and missing its dust jacket, but Myka smiled at seeing it.

The store wasn’t busy at the moment, so she took the children’s book and retreated to the set of comfy chairs to look through it. She had read this book, and the three that went with it, many times as a child, but Shel Silverstein’s poems always seemed to strike a chord somewhere deep inside Myka.

That’s why she was a bit miffed when her phone’s ringer tore through her sense of peace. That is, until she saw the name of the caller flash across the screen accompanied by her picture. The book was all but forgotten as she had a mini internal debate over whether or not she should answer.

She and Helena hadn’t spoken since the plane ride two days prior, but there was no reason for her not to speak to the other woman. They were working on being friends after all. So Myka slid the arrow across the screen of her phone and held it to her ear.

“Hello?” she tried to keep her voice from showing more than politeness.

“Myka?” the other voice greeted, “It’s Helena.”

“Yeah, I know, HG,” Myka rolled her eyes.

“Right, I was wondering,” there was a pause, “If you would like to meet me at Leena’s this afternoon. I quite miss our daily meetings there, I’d really like to have those back if we could… But I wanted to speak with you about something regardless.”

Myka was torn between wanting to distance her heart from Helena and wanting to give into it once more. At least it sounded like she was finally going to explain her situation to Myka, opening up to her at last. Maybe this was a good thing.

“What time?” Myka found herself inquiring.

Helena let out the breath she wasn’t aware she had been holding, “How does three sound? I’ve… and errand to run this moment, but I should be done before then.”

“Sounds good to me,” Myka shrugged though Helena could see it, “I’m at work right now anyhow.”

“Oh, I’m sorry for interrupting you then,” Helena apologized and Myka quirked an eyebrow at her surroundings.

“It’s alright, HG,” Myka reassured her, “We’re not exactly overflowing with shoppers or clients at the moment.”

“Very well, I’ll see you at Leena’s then?” Myka could hear the hopeful ring in Helena’s tone, could just imagine her pacing back and forth the length of her dorm, her hand pulling her hair back to a ponytail only to release it and repeat the process.

“Sure thing,” Myka swallowed, trying to get her thoughts back on track.

Myka spent the rest of her shift watching the time, her stomach a mess of nerves as she watched the hand slowly make its way across the face of the old grandfather clock.

She had been talking to Kurt, Friday and Saturday night. But those conversations were mostly Kurt telling Myka how he was settling in his new frat house. Apparently the last one was accidently burned down during a party.

Myka found she didn’t really look forward to her phone calls with Kurt. She thought she would miss him more, but really, she didn’t. It was almost a relief to not have to see him every day. She was looking forward to driving down to see him that weekend, but not as much as she was looking forward to coffee at Leena’s.

So when it was time for her to leave, she rushed out the door of the bookstore with a goodbye hurriedly thrown over her shoulder to her boss. She tried to pace herself as she walked to the coffee shop, not wanting to get herself worked up, not wanting to draw attention to herself.

When the bright diner came into view she slowed.

Helena, wearing dark jeans and a white button up shirt, paced back and forth in front of the door, muttering to herself, still unaware of her audience, and ignoring the stares of patrons inside.

“Hey,” Myka greeted with a smile, startling the Brit, “What are you doing out here?”

“I wanted to catch you before we went inside…” Helena refused eye contact, and she began to worry the locket around her neck.

“What is it?” Myka asked, her mood dampening.

“There are things I want to tell you, Myka,” She finally looked into her eyes, and Myka could see there was something HG was hiding, and she bristled. “Things I don’t know _how_ to even begin to tell you.”

“Look, HG,” Myka pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger, taking a deep breath to steady herself, “Just… Just tell me the truth.”

Helena nodded curtly, “Righty-ho then.”

She turned on her heel and opened the front door, motioning for Myka to go in.

Leena was standing behind the counter, talking to a little girl who sat there, kicking her feet back and forth in the air and talking adamantly about something to a very attentive Leena.

Myka turned to walk to their normal booth, but stopped when HG didn’t follow her. She looked around, finding Helena moving to stand at the counter, holding her arms out for the little girl who went easily into them, even though she was nearly too big for such a thing.

Myka stopped walking, so Helena closed the gap between them. Myka couldn’t look away from the little girl’s face, the dark hair, the familiar brown eyes, the pale skin… her mind refused to process what this meant though.

“Christina,” Helena’s voice held a tone, with which Myka was unfamiliar, “I would like for you to meet someone very special to me, this is Mummy’s very dear friend, Myka. Myka,” Helena looked up to the realization slowly dawning in Myka’s green eyes, “This is my daughter, Christina.”

“Hello, Myka,” Christina greeted brightly, though she clung tighter to the giraffe she was strangling in her left hand.

“Hi, Christina,” Helena was relieved to see Myka snap back into focus as she smiled and bent to be at eye level with the girl, “What’ve you got there?”

“Herbert,” Christina held the stuffed animal out for Myka to see better, she obviously loved the thing that had been repaired in several places, “Mummy got me another one from the zoo when she went with her friends. But George couldn’t come.” She explained, “One toy is enough.”

“That it is,” Myka agreed.

“Christina,” Helena pulled her attention, “Would you mind sitting at the counter with Leena while Mummy and Myka talk about boring adult things?”

Christina made a face but nodded, “Can I have chocolate milk?”

“Perhaps Leena would fetch you some if you asked her politely,” Helena suggested as she set her daughter on the stool closest to the booth her and Myka would share.

“So,” Myka spoke once the girl was settled and they found their seats, “You have a daughter.”

“That I do.” HG nodded, watching Myka’s face, but she was having trouble reading her.

“I’d like to hear about it.” Myka’s words were almost stern, “I mean, you know almost everything about me and my dysfunctional family. It’s your turn to tell me.”

“It’s a long story,” Helena warned.

“I have all day.” Myka made a show about getting more comfortable on her bench and Helena smiled.

“I was sixteen years old…”

* * *

Helena Wells was sixteen, and already she had a reputation for getting into trouble.

It wasn’t that she was intentionally rebellious, she was just bored, and causing her parent’s strife was the fastest way to quell her boredom.

When she met Nate, she couldn’t stand him.

He was handsome, full of himself, and very American. His father was in the military, and had been stationed all around Europe, and Nate had been kicked out of nearly every prep school he was placed in. He was the perfect person to bring home to annoy her parents.

It was supposed to be a fling, it was supposed to be simple. His days in London were numbered anyway, so she didn’t have to worry about running into him when they would inevitably break off their tryst.

When she missed her first period, Helena didn’t think much about it. She had been training in Kempo pretty regularly, after a mugging that occurred while she was walking home. The following month when she began vomiting uncontrollably every morning, it was Wolly who made the joke that perhaps she was pregnant.

She had laughed it off at the time, but it began eating at her. Her and Nate had slept together a few times, but she was sure they had been careful, used protection.

She was almost sure she was being ridiculous, allowing Wolly to get to her, but she bought a pregnancy test anyway. She never really expected it to show positive.

She sat at the edge of the tub for a long time, lost in her thoughts of panic. She walked down the hall in a daze, calling out for her mother. She finally found her in the den, looking over their families estates.

“What is it, darling?” her mother asked without lifting her eyes from the spread sheet, oblivious to the tears in her daughter’s eyes.

“I’m pregnant.” Her voice sounded small to her own ears.

Her mother finally looked up at her daughter over the rim of her reading glasses, an eyebrow quirked. Helena waited on baited breath for her mother’s words of comfort. That’s what mothers were supposed to do right? Help you when you didn’t know what to do? Say something when your whole world fell apart around you. Surely they weren’t supposed to just sit there and look at you with a look of utter disappointment plaster on their face.

Instead, Helena’s mother sat back in her chair and removed her glasses, “Charles!” she called down the hall, “Charles!”

Helena’s older brother came in after knocking lightly on the ajar door, “Did you call for me, Mother?”

“Yes,” She didn’t take her eyes off of her silently sobbing daughter, “I need you to take your sister to the clinic as soon as possible, she has something that needs to be… dealt with. Quickly, and quietly. You haven’t told anyone else about this, have you, darling?”

“What, no, Mother,” Helena shook her head, “Are you suggesting that I get an abortion?”

“Of course!” Her mother barked, “We can’t have a Wells woman pregnant out of wedlock, _especially_ at sixteen! But don’t worry, we’ll fix this.”

Helena shook her head. She didn’t want her mother to try and _fix_ anything! She just wanted her to pretend for five seconds that she was her daughter and that she loved her. She wanted her to tell her that everything was going to be alright.

“No, Mother,” Helena shook her head.

“I beg your pardon?” Her mother’s voice was dripping with venom.

“I’m keeping this baby.” HG declared.

“Do you expect to raise it by yourself?” She challenged, “You will receive no help from your father or myself.”

“Nate will help me…” But even Helena could admit how unlikely that seemed. Nate was a self-absorbed seventeen year old boy who didn’t wake up before noon.

“Right,” Her mother scoffed, “Good luck with that.”

Helena groaned in anger and frustration. She wasn’t sure why she thought her mother would be of any help.

She took the car to Nate’s parents’ flat, taking the stairs to their floor two at a time, trying to ignore the nausea that was building in her once more.

The first thing Nate asked when Helena told him was if she was sure it was his baby. Helena rolled her eyes and resisted the urge to slap him. Yes, she was sure. She didn’t bother telling him that he was the only boy she had been with since she lost her virginity.

The next thing he asked on what she planned to do. His exact words were “How are you gonna, you know, deal with it?” with a gesture towards Helena’s stomach.

“I’m not getting an abortion if that’s what you’re driving at.” Helena bristled at the way he said _it_.

“Okay, so you gonna give the kid up for adoption?” He tried.

Helena had thought about it, but she knew she couldn’t do that. Once she was set on having the baby, it had rooted somewhere inside her that it would be _her_ baby. She couldn’t stand the thought of another person raising her baby.

“No,” she shook her head, “I’m having this baby, and I shall be the one to raise her.”

“ _Her_?” Nate challenged as he stopped his incessant pacing.

But his father had been eves dropping on their conversation and burst into his son’s bedroom.

“God damn it, Nate,” he roared, “What the hell did you do?”

“Me?” he demanded, lifting his hands defensively, “She’s the one pregnant.”

Helena shot him a glare, but Nate’s father beat her to saying anything, “Last I checked, you would have had to play a pretty significant role in making that baby. So you are going to play a significant role in raising it!”

“But, Dad!” Nate practically whined.

Nate’s father slapped him across the face, “Enough. It’s time for you to grow up and accept responsibility for your actions. So, you are going to get a job, you are going to marry this poor girl, and you are going to be a father to that child. Do you understand me?”

Nate nursed the reddening cheek in his hand and looked pitifully up at his father, “Yes.”

“Yes what?” his father growled.

“Yes, Sir.” Nate dropped his hands to his sides.

“Good, now go tell your mother what you did.” He pointed to the door of his son’s bedroom.

After his son marched away, he looked at the sixteen year old girl carrying his grandchild. He was conflicted. On the one hand, he was sorry that she ended up now permanently attached to his screw up of a son. On the other, he was enraged that she was part of the reason his son no longer had hope of a future.

But she already looked so lost, he didn’t tell her anything, just turned about face and walked out, leaving Helena trying to cope with the face that not only would she be a mother, but also a wife. None of this was what she wanted. Part of her wished she could take it all back.

The charade of an engagement went well for about three months. That’s when Nate cheated on her. It most likely wasn’t the first time, but it was the first time she had the misfortune to walk in on him committing the act.

He had missed her appointment with the sonographer for her anomaly scan, Wolly ended up holding her hand through it instead. And while Helena had been insanely grateful for her best friend’s presence and support through the whole thing, she was hormonal and angry that the father of her baby hadn’t been there.

So she forced Wolly to drive her to Nate’s flat, where she stormed up to his room. He was in the middle of screwing the blonde bimbo from his work when she burst through the door. Nate rolled off of her and pulled a blanket to cover herself.

Helena stood in the doorway, jaw dropped trying to get over the mental block that was the image of her fiancé fucking another girl.

“Erm, do you mind?” the blonde had the audacity to ask, “We were a bit in the middle of something.”

Helena’s eyes narrowed, “Oh were you? That’s funny because I could have sworn that he was my fiancé!”

“Oh, you’re Helen.” The blonde looked from Nate and back to the pregnant girl, as if to say _aren’t you going to deal with her?_

“Helena,” HG corrected, angry that the girl clearly knew about Nate’s prior commitments and decided to sleep with him regardless.

Nate rose from the bed, wrapping the sheet around his waist. “I’ll be right back,” he reassured his partner before walking across the room and pushing Helena back out to the hall.

“HG, what are you doing here?” he demanded, as if she was the one at fault here.

“What am _I_ doing here?” she shot back at him, “I could ask you the same thing!”

“Right, Beth,” Nate rubbed his own shoulder.

“Oh right! _Beth_!” Helena shouted, “Did you forget you were affianced? That you had a baby on the way? That today you were supposed to take your fiancée to get her sonogram?”

“Right, the ultrasound thing was today.” He nodded, “How’d it go?”

Helena scoffed, “It went bloody fantastic! I had an epiphany whilst laying alone in a cold examination room, would you like to hear it? I suddenly realized that if my fiancé wanted to be free to romp around in whose ever rut he pleased, then he should have no claim over me or this child!”

“What are you saying?” he asked stupidly, he was having trouble understanding her, HG’s accent growing thick in her anger.

“I’m saying we are through,” Helena took a breath, “The wedding is off, and you shall have nothing to do with this baby.”

“Fine by me,” Nate shrugged before turning around to go back into his room, “Do me a favor and lock up when you leave, I don’t want to be bothered again.”

Helena had cried on Wolly’s shoulder for a solid hour. She didn’t love Nate, didn’t want to be with him, but the depth of his indifference towards her and her baby had stung. That mixed with the pregnancy hormones had sent her in to hysterics.

Helena’s parents were furious when she told them the engagement was off, not caring that Nate had cheated on their pregnant daughter, only caring about their family saving face. Charles and Wolly were the only ones who seemed to care at all about Helena and her baby.

So when Charles moved out of his parents’ house, he took his pregnant sister with him.

She spent the remainder of her pregnancy working on her home studies and inventing different things. That’s when she sold her first invention. Trying to keep herself distracted. If it weren’t for Charles and Wolly, she may have skipped more meals, never stepped foot outside, missed her doctor’s appointments.

The doctors were afraid for a while that she may develop postpartum depression, but when her baby girl was born healthy, and she held her little girl for the first time, she fell in love.

She greeted her little girl with a tired smile, “Hello, Christina, my beautiful baby girl.”

She spent the next year and a half completing her general education through home studies, selling several more inventions and thinking about what she was going to do with her life now. That’s when she decided to go to America for college. She had seen the looks people gave her around town, in the market. _There goes the Well’s girl and her bastard child_.

She didn’t want her Christina growing up with that stigma attached to her. She wanted Christina to have a mother she could be proud of. She wanted to make something of herself so that her daughter could have her best chance.

Leaving Christina with a stuffed giraffe and her older brother and his new wife was the singularly hardest thing Helena ever had to do.

If she could change one thing, she thinks it would be that moment. She didn’t regret coming to America, because this is where she met Claudia, Myka, Peter and Steven. This was where she built her life. What she regretted was not taking her daughter with her to start her new life. She honestly thought Christina would be better off without her.

She could see now that she had been wrong, and she could never get the last two years of her daughter’s life back. But she could fight to keep her here with her.


	9. The Way Things Must Be

_You are my sunshine..._

* * *

 

“What aren’t you telling me?” Myka asked as a lull filled the space between them that had been filled with Helena’s voice before.

“What do you mean?” Helena tilted her head, trying to understand the look in Myka’s eyes, decipher the tone in her voice.

“Don’t get me wrong HG,” Myka held her hands up, “I am so glad you finally decided to confide in me, I know how much that took for you to do. But, HG, I can see that there is something eating away at you that you haven’t told me. So can we skip all the drama now, can we not let me find out later, whatever it is? Won’t you just tell me?”

Helena’s thumb nail went between her teeth as she looked briefly over to her daughter, blowing bubbles in her tall glass of chocolate milk, at Leena laughing at the small mess she was making. She looked to Myka, her soul leaking through her eyes for the first time since she told her she was leaving. Myka was softening once more to Helena, and if she didn’t keep herself open, Myka was going to shut herself up again.

“The reason I had to return to London over the summer,” Helena began to fiddle with a napkin, slowly shredding it between her nimble fingers, “Is because Nate filed for sole custody of Christina.”

“That’s bullshit!” Myka covered her mouth over the expletive when she remembered how close the young girl was to them, “Sorry, but really?  The guy’s an ass, and he doesn’t deserve to have custody of Christina _at all._ ”

“Yes, thank you, I am aware,” Helena grumbled, “I spent the last three months, and most of my savings, trying to convince a judge of that. But we were getting nowhere, since I left Christina in London and he’s… well, _Nate…_ I was getting desperate. So I made a rash decision.”

“Oh God,” Myka felt sick, “You didn’t, I don’t know, kill him or something did you? Or kidnap your daughter?”

This line of thinking was interesting for Helena, “And what would you say if I told you that was the case?”

“I would tell you that it’s pretty dumb of you to return to school after committing murder!” Myka kept her voice low as she leaned forward over the table, “Then, I don’t know, I’d try to figure something out, ask if you hid the body… if there was evidence…” She was drawing on her knowledge from her criminology classes now, “God, you would be the first suspect! We’d have to get you out of Fairview and fast… what’s so funny?” she demanded.

Helena had a light to her eyes, a small smile tugging at the edge of her mouth, “You, trying to help me get away with murder.”

“Well then,” Myka sat back, blushing, “If that’s how you’re going to react, see if I don’t tell Interpol where to find you!”

“Myka,” Helena couldn’t help but to giggle, “It’s very sweet that your first thought to me being a murderer is to help me, I am honestly touched. But it isn’t necessary. I didn’t kill Nate, as you said, it would be pretty dumb of me considering I would be the prime suspect.”

“Then what did you do?” Myka asked, still feeling rather foolish at her initial reaction.

“I proposed,” Myka flinched at the word, at the pause following the word that was unintentional on HG’s part, “that he move to the colonies, to Fairview. Where I would put him and Christina up in an apartment for the duration of the trial period set up by the courts. It’s my responsibility to pay the rent and provide whatever Christina needs.”

“So…” Myka screwed her eyes shut, “You’re living with him?”

“No!” Helena shook her head, “Heavens no, you couldn’t pay me enough to live with that man. No, I’ll be living in the dorms with Claudia, still. But I will be spending as much time with her as I possibly can. But part of the agreement is that Nate and I have equal time, so, I have her Mondays and Wednesdays and every other weekend from Friday to Sunday.”

“Trail period,” Myka said suddenly, “You said this was just a trial period? How long…?”

“Eighteen months,” Helena’s heart felt heavy.

“And what happens at the end of eighteen months?” Myka grew worried that maybe Helena’s presence in her life wasn’t as permanent as she was beginning to think…

“I have no idea,” Helena sighed heavily, her shoulders bending beneath some great weight, “We go back in front of the judge and he makes a decision.”

So essentially, the judge could order to whatever he deemed fit for Christina’s benefit, including sending Helena back to London. And Helena would do it, Myka knew she would. She could see the way HG looked at her daughter, she would move heaven and earth for that girl. Seeing this was bitter sweet, because wanting Helena to get everything she wanted could mean that Myka would eventually have to give her up.

Her reflex was to pull away from the danger of more pain. To cut her losses and duck out before she let her heart trust Helena once again. But she had become more selfish over summer, and perhaps that was a good thing, because she wanted to spend all the time she had left with Helena. She truly had missed her, couldn’t imagine giving her up once more, so she wasn’t going to think about it until it was a sure thing.

“Well, if that judge is worth his weight in salt” Myka smiled at Helena, “He’ll see that the right thing to do, the best thing to do for Christina is let you retain full custody.”

Helena saw the slight change in her friend, and for a moment she let herself feel hope, but she kept it in check, “I need a lawyer who believes in me half as much as you do.”

“Well, I _was_ thinking of going pre-law…” Myka smirked, “But I don’t think you could afford me.”

“Well, certainly not now,” Helena sighed, “I’m afraid that I am rather broke. Until my genius mind can think of another clever invention to sell to the highest bidder, I’m stuck working for Leena.”

“Here?” Myka pulled back, “You’re gonna work here?”

“Yes, actually,” Helena rose and walked to the hostess *box thingy* and pulled out a light blue apron with her name embroidered on it, “My shift starts soon.”

“Sooner that soon, HG,” Leena called out, “Diner rush is just about to start. And you little one,” Leena bopped Christina on the nose, “Need to get off the counter so I can clean it for the _paying_ customers.”

“You said I could pay you in hugs!” Christina complained with all the indignity a four year old could muster.

“Come on, darling,” Helena lifted her from the stool, “What am I going to do with you, hm?” she was referring to the chocolate milk mustache on her face, but Myka heard it differently.

“I can watch Christina,” Myka volunteered before she realized she was speaking, “I mean, until the end of your shift? I can take her to the park, or library? I’d like to get to know her.”

“Really?” Helena looked partly relived and partly shocked, “You would be okay with that?”

“Yeah, of course,” Myka nodded, “What do you say kiddo?” She smiled at Christina, “You don’t mind keeping me company while your mom works, huh? I get bored without her.”

Christina smiled and nodded before slipping out of her mother’s arms.

Helena gave her daughter a kiss on the top of her head before mouthing “thank you” at Myka who simply shrugged in response. She could see the stress weighing on her friend, and if the other option was sending Christina back home to be looked after by the father of the year, she would volunteer anyday.

“What do you say, Christina?” Myka asked as they walked hand in hand out of Leena’s, “I’m thinking we go to the park. Does that sound good?”

“Are there swings?” she asked in her small chiming voice.

“I’m sure there are.” Myka reassured her.

“Good,” The little girl beamed and hugged her giraffe closer to her chest, “I love the swings. Uncle Charles never took me to the swings, but Mummy and Wolly do. Every day.”

“Does your dad take you to the park?” Myka questioned.

“MM, No.” Christina sighed, sounding much more grown up than a four year old, “Dad doesn’t take me anywhere. I mostly sit and watch cartoons or color when I’m with him.”

“The more I hear about your dad the less I like him,” Myka mumbled, “Sorry.”

“That’s okay.” Christina nodded, “Hey Myka, can I tell you a secret?”

“Sure thing kiddo.” Myka nodded as they paused at a cross walk that lead to the park entrance.

“I don’t really like my dad either.” She whispered, looking around conspiratorially as if saying such a thing was going to get her into a lot of trouble.

Myka didn’t know how to respond to that. It wasn’t as if she could defend Nate, knowing what she knew she really didn’t want to.

“And why is that?” Myka found herself curious to see how the mind of this little girl worked.

“Well,” She stretched out the word, “Dad never wants to do anything fun. Just watch TV or play quietly when he’s with his friends. And he never wants to play or read with me.”

“That’s no fun!” Scoffed Myka as she directed Christina towards the swing set.

“I like being with Mummy more,” she nodded, “Even though sometimes she’s busy, she always plays with me, And she reads me stories before bed time. Uncle Charles and Aunt Isabel _never_ did any of that.”

“She is a great mom, isn’t she?” Myka smiled as she lifted the girl to the swing and began to push her softly.

“She talked a lot about you.” Christina claimed between giggles as Myka pushed her higher and higher.

“Who? Your mom?” Myka missed a beat in their rhythm and nearly ended up with a shoe to her face.

“Uh-huh,” Myka moved to stand in front of the swing set now that Christina was pumping her legs on her own, “She told me that you and her went on mar-marvelous adventures together.”

“She told you about that?” Myka questioned, wondering what else Helena had shared with her.

“Uh-huh, she told me it was a secret. That I couldn’t tell anybody, not Wolly or Uncle Charles or Dad. But it’s okay that I tell you, right? Since they were your adventures too?”

“That’s perfectly fine, Christina,” Myka nodded, “But I think your mom is right about not telling anyone else. They were really dangerous adventures, and they have to stay our little secret, okay?”

“Okay, Myka.” Christina laughed before jumping from her seat at the top of the swing’s arc.

Myka gasped and moved to catch her. There was a sharp pain in her shoulders, but in her arms rested a madly laughing four year old.

“You catched me!” she said delighted.

“I caught you.” Myka wasn’t sure if she was correcting the girl’s grammar, or simply stating the thing she was shocked about.

“Yeah!” Christina agreed, “It was fun!”

“Let’s not do it again,” Myka sighed as she put the girl down, her hands shaking slightly, “You’re gonna give me a heart attack.”

“Alright,” Christina grumbled, but her face instantly brightened, “You know what would be _really_ fun? Let’s go on an adventure! Like you and Mummy did!”

“I don’t know, Christina,” Myka shook her head, “Our adventures are really dangerous.  I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Oh, it’ll be just for pretend, Myka!” The girl reassured her, “Come on, you me and Herbert can go after a pretend curiosity.” She looked up at Myka, her brown eyes wide and pleading.

Apparently the ability to get whatever you want just by looking at someone was a genetic trait, because Christina had surely inherited the talent from Helena. Or perhaps the Wells women had that effect on Myka alone, because she found herself giving into the whim of a child.

“Oh, alright. But no more jumping off things!” She said sternly.

“Aces!” Christina cheered, “Come on! We’ve got a curiosity to find! Let’s go, Herbert!”

Myka spent the next hour chasing Christina and Herbert the giraffe all over the park/ Sword fighting, and shooting laser guns at bad guys, running through the jungle gym that transformed into a strange city, saving Herbert from certain doom and finally out smarting the villain.

The girl had one hell of an imagination, and Myka had thoroughly enjoyed the time passing. With the bad guy caught and held in imaginary prison, and the sun beginning to fall low in the sky, Myka thought it was just about time to switch activities.

“Christina,” Myka spoke after a moment’s thought, this was _Helena’s_ daughter after all, “Do you like books?”

The four year old smiled hugely, “I adore books! People in books have the best adventures!”

“Well, I work in a place full of books, all different kinds,” Myka smiled at the awe blossoming on her young face, “Would you like to see?”

“Oh, could I?” She bounced on the balls of her feet.

Christina spoke endlessly about different books her mom had read to her, the Wizard of Oz, James and the Giant Peach, Gullivers Travels. She was impressed by the understanding this four year old had about those works.

“Myka!” Abigale greeted as they walked into The Red Couch, “I thought you’d gone home for the day?”

“I got roped into hanging out with perhaps the most adorable little girl on the planet, and we ended up saving the day, so I think it’s worth it,” Myka explained with a smile, “And she told me that she adores books, so here we are.”

“Is that so?” Abigale smiled as she moved around the counter and knelt so she was eyelevel with Christina before sticking out her hand, “Hello, I’m Abigale Cho, but you can call me Abby. What’s your name?”

“Christina Wells,” She stood straighter as she spoke.

“Christina, it is very nice to meet you. Why don’t you go and look at the books while I speak to Myka for a moment?”

“Really? May I?” she looked hopefully up at Myka.

“Sure, go ahead, kiddo.” Myka nudged her towards the stacks of books.

Abigale rose, crossing her arms over her chest, “Wells, and an English accent, hm? Why does that sound so familiar?”

“She’s HG’s daughter,” Myka explained.

“Ah,” The doctor nodded, “And how does that make you feel?”

“Really, _Abby_?” Myka quirked an eyebrow, “That was a little head shrinky, even for you.”

“You’re avoiding the question, Myka.” Abigale pushed.

“I don’t know what I think,” Myka admitted, “She’s a great kid, but I’m not too sure about her father’s effect on her.”

“You still didn’t answer the question.” Abigale pointed out.

“I _feel_ …” Myka took a breath, “Angry, because this was a pretty huge thing that Helena kept hidden from me. But I also feel really happy that she finally told me. And Christina is such a good kid…”

There was a thud from somewhere in the store followed by a low “ouch!”

“Well, most of the time,” Myka mumbled before moving to find the precocious little girl, “Christina?”

She found her easily enough in the adventure section, rubbing a spot on her head as a book lay open, faced down on the floor. It had fallen from a higher shelf, she having reached for it but unable to get a firm grip on it.

“Are you okay?” Myka knelt by her.

“Yeah, I just wanted to read the book but it hurt me.” She grumbled.

“Well, books tend to do that even when you read them.” Myka chukled, “Do you know how to read?”

“A little.” She admitted shyly.

“Would you like me to read this book to you?” Myka offered, and Christina nodded.

Myka took the book and the girl to the couches she had occupied earlier in the day. She sat, lifting the girl to her lap before settling in and opening the book.

Myka cleared her throat, “ _Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank and of having nothing to do; once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, ‘and what is the use of a book’ Alice thought, ‘without pictures or conversation?’._ ”

* * *

Helena grew more and more anxious as her shift came to an end and she hadn’t heard from Myka. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust her, it was that she really was insanely curious to know how they were getting on. They were the two most important people in Helena’s life, and she wanted them to like one another.

The laughter that filled an emptying Leena’s then pulled a smile to her own lips as Myka and Christina came waltzing in, their hands clasped between them.

“There’s my two favorite girls!” Helena chimed as she moved to scoop Christina up in her arms, “And how was your evening?”

“It was so much fun, Mummy!” Christina declared before yawning, “We went curiosity hunting and then we read about a girl named Alice and a rabbit that took her to another place.”

“Your kid sure does love adventure,” Myka smiled.

“I’m glad to hear you had fun, but it is time for you to get home,” she said sternly to her tired daughter, “Let’s call Claduia and see where she’s at.”

“Oh, she’s at my apartment,” Myka told her, “I can take you and Christina home, if you like.”

“That would be lovely,” Helena smiled, “And convenient seeing as Nate lives in your apartment complex.”

* * *

Myka didn’t know how to react. That’s not true, she knew how she wanted to react when they walked to Nate’s apartment, which was right across the way from where Myka’s was. Helena explained that she knew this was a safe area from Myka living there, and that’s why she chose it. Myka felt off, like there was an enemy in her territory.

She especially didn’t like the idea of leaving Christina with her father, but she wanted to meet him. This man who was perhaps the biggest asshole Myka had ever heard of.

So when they knocked on the apartment door, she had to do her best to hold in to her anger. It was a little easier when Christina refused to let go of Myka’s hand. Much like her mother, her touch had a calming effect.

“Nate really, this would be easier if you gave me a key!” Helena complained loudly as there was a big show of undoing the deadbolt and chain from the otherside, “I’m the one who pays the rent on this flat!”

“That is your own fault.” Nate snorted, “You volunteered.”

“Only so I could keep my daughter.” Helena grumbled in response when the door finally pulled back to revile Nate, who hadn’t bothered to get dressed at all that day, still walking around in his boxers and white t-shirt.

Myka looked at him, trying hard to see what Helena had ever seen in him. Sure he was good looking, if you could see around the mountain of smugness he kept in front of him.

“Who’s this?” He smiled crookedly at Myka.

“She’s way out of your league, Nate.” Helena chuckled before pushing past him.

“My room’s over here, Myka!” Christina tugged her inside, “This way!”

“So, Myka, huh?” Nate looked her up and down as his daughter lead her to the hall way, “I’m Nate.”

“Oh, I have heard plenty about you,” Myka rolled her eyes.

“Only good things I hope.” Nate continued, unabashed.

Myka scoffed, but didn’t reply since Christina was getting excited about showing Myka all her books and toys. Getting even happier when Myka told her that giraffes were her favorite animal as well.

Helena was busy checking to be sure there was food for Christina in the small kitchen.

“Wow, your friend is really hot,” Nate leaned on the counter, “Is she single?”

“You’re not her type.” Helena said simply.

“I seriously doubt that.” Nate chuckled.

HG ignored him, moving to go see where her daughter and best friend disappeared to. She leaned in the door way of her daughter’s room, watching Myka kneel down to talk to her girl.

“Listen, kiddo, I live in the apartment right across the little road outside. Apartment thirteen, do you know what a thirteen looks like?”

“It’s a one and a three.” Christina nodded.

“Right, good job,” Myka smiled, “If you ever need any help, if anything is wrong, you come and get me. I live there with my two friends, Pete and Steve, I’ll take you to meet them soon. Whatever happens, you can ask me for anything, okay, kid?”

“Okay Myka,” Christina nodded before wrapping her arms around Myka’s neck and hugging her tight.

“Alright, I’ve gotta go now, you be good, okay?” Myka pulled back from her before pulling a small paperback book from the back of her jeans, “You hold on to this.”

“Alice in Wonderland,” Christina held it reverently, “You got it for me?”

Myka smiled, “Yeah, kid, just for you.”

“Oh, thank you Myka!” she hugged her once more and Myka chuckled when she rushed to give it a premier spot on her small bookshelf.

Myka blushed when she saw Helena standing in the door way, watching her with an indescribable look in her eye.

“What?” She asked.

“Oh, nothing.” Helena shook her head.

After Helena and Christina had their goodbye, and HG reassured her daughter she would be back the following day, she and Myka left.

They stood in the road between the two apartments for a moment.

“The same goes for you, too.” Myka spoke suddenly, but softly.

“Excuse me?” Helena questioned, confused about what Myka was saying.

“If you ever need anything, you can always ask me to help.” Myka assured her, “I’m always here for you, HG.”

The space between them was charged as they held eye contact. This close, Helena could hear Myka’s breathing increase, see her pupils dilate slightly and she had the urge to lean forward and close the gap between their lips.

But a sudden ringing noise pulled them away from each other and Myka looked guiltily down at the phone she had in her hand, “It’s Kurt.”

Helena nodded, “you should get it.”

“Are you sure?” Myka asked, trying to read the woman that had suddenly donned a passive mask.

“Of course, darling,” Helena waved her off, “I’m just going to go grab Claudia, we have a bit of work to do before classes start in the morning.”

“Okay.” Myka nodded before stepping off to answer her phone, “Hey, Kurt, no I’m not busy.”

Helena sighed and let a few tears fall from her eyes as she gripped the locket that hung from around her neck.

She hoped that one day this pain would become bearable. That she wouldn’t spend every moment aching for Myka.

But, mostly, she really just wanted to be allowed to give into that want.

* * *

 


	10. Warehouse 13

_... my only sunshine..._

* * *

 

The warehouse was unhappy.

That was putting things lightly. It was absolutely furious. But its caretaker couldn’t understand why. When she would enter the warehouse, it would greet her familiarly as it always had, but the warehouse was clearly on edge. The artifacts were getting restless on their shelves, and it’s own agents seemed to want to spend as little time on the floor as possible.

The warehouse wished it could better explain to Mrs. Fredric what was wrong, but the best it could do was cause havoc for the agents attending to it.

MacPherson was the true target of the warehouse’s wrath, but he was untouchable.

The warehouse missed the old senior agent who used to be there. Missed the agents that had come before Sandra and Raymond. It missed Arthur Neilson and It missed Rebecca and Jack. The warehouse mourned the loss of them deeply, refused to make an attachment with the two new people who had taken their place.

The regents thought the warehouse was being petty. They didn’t see the deep mistrust that the warehouse held for James MacPherson and anyone who blindly listened to him.

They didn’t understand how helpless the warehouse had been when it was forced to watch the new senior agent kill Jack and Rebecca. All the regents knew was that two agents had died under the directive of Arthur Nielson, who then decided it was time to retire.

MacPherson had a dark heart. The warehouse had never trusted him. And it was only proven right when he started to steal artifacts. Things no one would notice, things that wouldn’t be inventoried for another hundred years. But the warehouse noticed.

It had a connection to every artifact that had ever been in its walls. So it knew that Macpherson had been slowly releasing artifacts into the world once more.

At first, James had convinced himself that it was only for the money. After all, it wasn’t like the agents were paid anything. More like given a monthly allowance and room and board at the bed and breakfast in Univille.

Then it was about the integrity of the artifacts he was selling. They were made for a reason, they were made for people to use them. In fact, if they sat on a dusty shelf for centuries on end, that itself was a crime.

Now, it was only about chaos. The world was boring, drab. It needed some livening up. What better way to do that than cause an up roar through the artifacts? Besides, they provided the nice little added benefit of culling the weak from the human heard. The world should thank him for the service he was providing future generations. Ridding the world of the unworthy.

Jack and Rebecca had begun to suspect something was wrong with the other agent. Began their own quiet investigation. But a hit sent them to Russia, where one of MacPherson’s artifacts was stirring up trouble. Artie had sent them without doing the proper research on the happenings. Too concerned with the sheer volume of hits they had been receiving lately. Just wanting to snag it, bag it, and tag it as soon as possible.

To this day, he blames himself for their deaths. He should have gone with them, would have had he known which artifact it was.

He could have sworn that the first agents of 13 had collected this artifact, but a search of the database showed that it was never cataloged.

MacPherson made sure that’s what it showed.

The warehouse had gone dark for a while. Refusing to allow anyone inside after Artie told it good bye for the last time. But the regents persuaded Mrs. Fredric to convince the warehouse that the best thing to do was to keep going.

Sandra and Raymond had no idea what MacPherson was doing when they first arrived. But they were new, and easily manipulated.

Raymond thought that James was selling artifacts that they would just swoop in and recollect before anyone got hurt. It was just an ingenious way to hustle money while they worked in the government warehouse. No harm, no foul.

Sandra was smarter than that, but also skewed by her attraction to the power she sensed in James MacPherson. It was like playing with fire, the affair she started with the senior agent, but it had the element of danger she was addicted to. And, having slept with her, MacPherson figured he had a hold on Sandra, could trust her with him plan. Or at least, part of his plan.

Sandra was the one who convinced him that he wasn’t thinking big enough. Why simply be the richest mad when the world burned when you could be king of the new world order?

MacPherson kept Sandra closer after that. She had a cunning element that he wanted to use, not be put up against. So he continued to entertain her crush.

All the regents noticed was their agents were regularly collecting artifacts. So they didn’t bother to look too closely.

That is, except Jane Lattimer.

Mrs. Frederic trusted the school teacher more than the other regents. She wasn’t sure why, just that the warehouse seemed to like her more than the others. So the two older women confided in one another their discomfort with what was happening in the warehouse.

MacPherson gave Jane a bad vibe, as well as that new female agent of his. And she couldn’t stand the male agent, who seemed to have the attention span of a guppy.

They knew the agents were up to no good, but they could prove it.

Then, when Jane’s own son became involved with artifacts their plan began.

At first, she had been worried, angry even that her son had become involved with the dangerous part of her life that she had worked so hard to keep him out of. He, with his team, collected four artifacts in the span of a week. One week. That was unheard of. They obviously needed to recruit these college students, or deal with them before they did something ridiculous.

Then, Jane had met them. Had seen the five work together and it was something to be seen. Never before had a group fit together so well, each filling in the missing pieces for the other. They became their own family unit of sorts, with their own dysfunction, for sure. But it was amazing.

Mrs. Fredric wanted them in the warehouse. To see if the entity liked them as much as she did. But she knew the warehouse also wanted Artie back. The man was blaming himself for something that wasn’t his fault. He had given up on his calling over this guilt.

Joshua Donovan was the only one unaware of what his boss was doing. It was his job to figure out what was wrong with the warehouse’s systems. He had been working on it for three years, but he wasn’t the savant his sister was, and he just couldn’t figure out what was wrong with it. Everything _seemed_ to be in working order. But if that were the case, why were there still random electrical surges? Why did the database sometimes go down for a few hours every week? Why did the neutralization field not seem to be working as well as it used to?

He was tearing his hair out at the roots trying to solve this problem. He wasn’t exactly on good terms with the warehouse team. He had stumbled on one of their so called artifacts. Had tried to use it to rectify his past, get his whole family back. But it hadn’t worked. Only cause trouble for a whole bunch of people. So now, under the threat of the bronze sector, he was working under MacPherson to create a better system for the warehouse.

He wished he had help. It was too much for one person. He was slowly losing his mind. He was afraid his sister would sense it when she came to visit him over the summer. He had tried to get her out of Univille as soon as possible. Because he had kept tabs on her. Knew how much of a genius she was, and the last thing he wanted was for her to be stuck in an impossible job in the warehouse as he was.

Joshua loved Claudia, even if he had no idea how to show it. She was the only family he had left. He had to protect her.

Mrs. Fredric and Jane Lattimer were not the only ones looking to recruit. MacPherson was trying to draw out of hiding the woman who had caused him so much grief in California. Myka Bering.

He found her in Colorado Springs. She seemed like a normal college student, hanging out with friends every night, working in her parents shop during the day. All rather boring. Either he had the wrong person, or she was a phenomenal actress in hiding.

He figured she had a home base somewhere in California, since that was the only state she had collected artifacts with her team. But how was he going to find where they were hiding those artifacts of theirs? How was he going to get them back?

He would have to release another one. Perhaps in the same town as her boyfriend? Yes, that was sure to get a rise out of her. But what artifact could he use? Something dangerous. Yes, that way if something went wrong, well it would be dealt with regardless.

What dangerous artifact could he set lose?

His laugh echoed through the warehouse as he spun to look at the shelves full of possibility. He came to a decision, typing the artifact into the search field

What better artifact to use on a Literature major that Shakespeare’s folio?

* * *

 


	11. Lackluster

_... you make me happy..._

* * *

 

Myka pretended to sleep as Pete drove them to Fresno to visit Kurt and Amanda for the weekend, thinking of how the previous three weekends had gone for them.

They drove down the first weekend after school started as well. Myka had been a little nervous, but no more than usual. It wasn’t as if she and Kurt hadn’t seen each other the week previous, talked every night on the phone. She was happy to be seeing him, but not as excited as Pete thought she should be. He had been practically bouncing in the passenger seat, excited to see his girlfriend because the Skype dates weren’t enough for him. He wanted to hold her hand while they spoke, to feel her skin on his. The first week of school away from her had been the longest seven days of his life.

Amanda and Pete spent the weekend alone together, “catching up.” As if anyone didn’t know what they really meant. Amanda’s roommate had kept herself occupied out of the apartment from Friday to the end of Sunday.

Kurt spent the weekend taking his girlfriend to different parties, showing off her beauty as an accessory while unconsciously being sure no one knew she was anything more than a pretty face and killer legs. Myka didn’t mind being paraded around so much, or not talking to Kurt’s friends, she had grown accustomed to it over the summer, and spent the weekend texting HG and Claudia anyway.

The following weekend, it was Amanda and Kurt’s turn to make the Drive up to Fairview. This made Myka a little more anxious and she spent most of Friday glad she didn’t have a class and cleaning her apartment top to bottom. Pete even helped, equally nervous about Amanda seeing it for the first time.

Helena had been at the apartment, sitting on the bed, observing Myka flip out as her daughter ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the counter.

“I thought his fraternity was a pig sty?” She commented as Myka whirled around her, “What would it bother him if you have your books unalphabetized?”

Myka didn’t answer, knowing HG wouldn’t appreciate what she had to say, and it would just cause her to get that look in her eye. The one that made her look as if she smelled something rotten. Myka felt like she was still trying to impress Kurt, which included having a nice apartment.

HG was leaving with Christina when Amanda and Kurt arrived, so she stepped to the side to allow them through the doorway.

“Hey, Helena!” Amanda greeted with a smile, “Who’s this little girl?”

HG smiled, she had a good feeling about Amanda, “This is Christina, my daughter. Say hi, darling.”

Christina waved shyly, but smiled up at Amanda brightly.

“You got a kid?” Kurt’s voice had HG tensing automatically, he dumped his bags on the living room couch, “Who knocked you up?”

Amanda rolled her eyes, “Ignore him, Helena, trust me. I’ve had to listen to him tell me dumb blonde jokes for the last two and a half hours.”

“I just mean, you look good for a mom,” Kurt insisted as he began to look around the movie and game shelf, “You’re a total milf.”

Helena quirked an eyebrow and looked to Amanda for translation, but the blonde shook her head in a “you don’t wanna know” gesture.

“Right then,” HG nodded, “I’ll just be going then, Pete should be home soon, I believe Steven is out for the evening with Claudia, and Myka is just getting out of the shower now. She told me to tell you to make yourselves comfortable.”

When she finally got out the door, Kurt was sitting down in front of the game console and Amanda was putting her bag in Pete’s room. Claudia told her later what ‘milf’ meant, and never before had Helena felt so simultaneously disgusted and angered by a single comment meant to be a complement.

Pete and Amanda managed to leave Pete’s room a few times to go on a double date and socialize, but Steve had to keep his stereo on most of the weekend regardless.

Now, Myka wasn’t exactly thrilled to be in Fresno. Kurt had been distant this week, not that Myka noticed, having been equally distant with him. It felt like a chore waking up that morning to pack for the weekend trip.

She knew it was Nate’s weekend with Christina, so she was sure to have Steve know to look out for weirdness happening across the street. She also double checked to make sure there was actual food in his kitchen, having been let in by Christina, her father still passed out in his room from the night before, so she was left to mostly fend for herself. Myka made sure that the milk and juice was on a low shelf in the fridge, and her snacks could be reached on the shelves so she wouldn’t risk hurting herself by climbing on the counter tops.

“If Nate doesn’t wake up before lunch time,” Myka told the girl as she was leaving, “Call me and I’ll have Steve bring you some food, okay, kiddo? And don’t answer the door for anyone except Mom, Steve or Claudia, okay?”

“I know Myka.” Christina nodded seriously, “You know, I like having you live close to me. It’s like I have three parents.” She looked over her shoulder to Nate’s closed bedroom door, “Or, at least two.”

Myka sighed, _one month down, seventeen to go._ She found herself counting the days along with Helena until she would be before the judge again. Myka was looking into custody case files, trying to figure out how to help her friend. Short of Nate relinquishing paternal rights, it was going to be messy no matter what.

 Friday evening was awkward for Myka. She couldn’t keep her mind on anything. Not really difficult since they were at another house party with Kurt’s friends, but noticeable to the other girlfriends trying to converse with her.

Kurt’s boisterous personality was beginning to grate her nerves. His laugh making her want to punch him sometimes. But she knew it was only because her head was somewhere north. Things used to be so easy with Kurt, now all she could think about was getting back home to Christina and HG. It being Nate’s weekend meant HG was going to work herself into the ground and Christina would be lucky to get more than Lucky Charms to eat. She was extremely worried for them both, keeping her phone held tightly in her hand, determined not to miss a text or call.

By Saturday midmorning, Myka was praying for a distraction from the extremely tedious duty of being Kurt’s arm candy. And it came, with Amanda asking Pete and Myka to go with her to the school’s theater where there was practice for a play that wasn’t set to open until the spring. Amanda was on the build team that made the sets, but she knew Myka liked Shakespeare and was able to get them in for a practice. Kurt elected not to join them, having better things to do then watch the director yell at the new actors.

As Myka watched the actors and actresses from the left side of the stage, her head on her knees as she said the lines for Othello under her breath along with the actors. At one point, when the actress playing Desmonda forgot her line, and the person supposed to be calling them out for the actors was distracted backstage, it was Myka who called out the words for her.

She was enjoying herself thoroughly. As was her best friend who was torn between watching his girlfriend work in her element, and watching the drama that had nothing to do with Shakespeare unfold. Two passive aggressive girl fights, a begrudged students sulking and one thrown screwdriver later, the only casualty was Pete’s phone, and that’s because he tripped over a tool box and it fell from his pocket into a bucket of paint.

About an hour into the practice, the actress playing Desmonda stormed off the stage in a fit of premodona anger. So they started the scene over without her, excepting her to enter the stage on her cue.

When she didn’t, the actor playing the Cassio repeated his line louder, “ _Give renew'd fire to our extincted spirits_. _And bring all Cyprus comfort!_ ”

Emilia, Iago and Rodrigo looked over their shoulders for Desmonda. But when she didn’t appear, they began to sway uneasily and look to the director.

“Oh for christs sake!” he shouted, “Where is my Desmona! Let’s go!”

The acress stumbled on stage, looking around fearfully, grabbing at her wrist, then neck.

“There you are!” the director sighed dramatically, “Well?”

The actress fell against a prop with flourish, “ _Oh Antony..nay..I will take thee too.”_ Her voice was thick, as she looked out to where the crowd would be before letting her head fall back.

“Oh come on!” The director threw down his copy of the script, “Is it too much to ask that you all remember the lines from the correct fucking play!? Stacy, you are Desmonda!”

But the actress didn’t move from her pose, so the director yelled at her again. Still there was no response.

The stage hand behind the prop she was leaned against came around to her under the death glare of the director. He put his hand on her shoulder and shook her. Stacy’s head lolled to the side, and now two small puncture wounds could be seen bleeding on her neck. Myka sat up straighter.

The stage hand put his fingers to the other side of her throat, “oh god!” he pulled back suddenly, “She’s dead!”

There was a brief moment where everyone, including Myka, thought he was joking. But when it became clear he wasn’t, a small panic ensued. The director’s assistant was the one to calm the actors and get them away from Stacy as an ambulance was called.

Pete was standing next to Myka and Amanda as the EMT’s wheeled Stacy’s covered body away.

“That was… weird, right?” Pete asked his best friend, who’s only response was to nod.

A feeling nagged at them both as they exchanged a look.

“I’m gonna go make a phone call.” Myka told them absently as she stepped away.

Claudia answered on the third ring, “Hey Mykes! How’s the valley? Enjoying the smog?”

“I can feel my lungs slowly dying as we speak,” Myka rolled her eyes, “Listen, can yu do me a favor? Are you near your computer?”

“Are you kidding me?” she could practically feel the sarcasm oozing from the other end of the phone, “What do you need?”

“I need you to run your curiosity program?” she whispered, looking around to be sure no one ws listening in, “See if you get a ping in Fresno.”

There was a pause on the other end, all Myka could hear was the techie breathing, “I thought we were out of the curiosity hunting business? Remember? Scary agents? Life and death situations? Any of this ringing a bell?”

Myka sighed as she leaned from one foot to the other, “That vacation was never supposed to be permanent, Claud. We were just supposed to lay low for a while.”

It was quiet again on Claudia’s end, Myka knew she would have to push her a little harder. Claudia still hadn’t really gotten over the near death experience if what Helena told her was true. But she also knew how much fun Claudia had over spring break.

“I feel like this might be something that needs to be dealt with by one of us,” Myka told her, “And besides, you can’t tell me you don’t miss it.”

“That doesn’t mean I miss the danger Mykes.”

“A girl died, Claudia,” Myka poke quickly now, “So, if this is something the police aren’t going to be able to solve, she deserves to have us at least look into it.”

“Okay, okay,” Claudia sighed, “I’ll run the system to sweep, but it’ll take about an hour to run through the variables.”

“That’s fine,” Myka nodded, “Pete and I will poke around a bit.”

“Okay, be careful, Mykes.” Claudia said sternly.

“I always am.” Myka said cheerfully before hanging up.

She sent a quick text to HG before turning to find her best friend to catch him up.

* * *

Helena was completely fried. Between school, work at Leena’s and taking care of Christina, she was often running on fumes.

Her daily coffee dates with Myka were the only things that kept her going most of the time, that’s why the weekends were always so hard on her. It worked so that her weekends without Christina were the same weekends it was Myka’s turn to make the trip south to visit Kurt. She spent those weekends working a double shift and getting lost in rebuilds so she wouldn’t have to think about either loss for too long.

She was working when her phone buzzed in her pocket so she ignored it.

Working at Leena’s was harder than she thought most times. Keeping up the fake smiles hurt her face, customers were often rude and demanding, and the work was as monotonous as it was exhausting.

Despite the nature of her work, Helena took pride in it. If you were going to do something, you had to do it right. That was one of the few values HG’s parents had managed to program her with. So she had memorized the menu the first day, so she knew it forwards and backwards, could answer any question, and the regulars who knew that sometimes liked to test that fact for fun. She didn’t mind that. Regulars tended to tip her more than sporadic patrons and new visitors.

Thanks to the time she spent questioning Pete about his sister, Helena also had a basic understanding of American Sign Language, and because of that, a deaf student by the name of David now frequented Leena’s. He was one of Helena’s favorite customers, and even if he wasn’t sitting in her section, she always took the time to have a conversation with him.

There were always a few unbearable customers. The ones who made it their mission to torment the workers who served them. Helena mostly made due with putting on a polite smile, taking the abuse silently to their faces and swearing vehemently in French in the kitchen while she waited for her orders. When one patron tripped her, after sending her back to the kitchen three times to fix the order, claiming she had gotten it wrong even though she had perfect recall even without the notepad, she learned about how her coworkers dealt with it.

She was the newbie. Her position had been held by four different people before her in the last six months alone. So the other workers, the hostesses, cooks, baristas, waiters and waitresses, and busboys, often distanced themselves. That is, until Helena had proved herself to them.

So while she dropped a plate that shattered on impact, the busboy on duty rushed to sweep it up while the dining area clapped at her misfortune and she blushed deeply. She worked to control her anger while she wiped her hands on her apron.

“Careful there, doll.” The man said as his tablemates high fived him.

Unfortunately, he was one of her regulars. Always ended up in her section because none of the other wait staff wanted him and she was the new girl. But now that Helena was one of them, they began to help her.

He sat in a different section every time, his food, while always made perfectly, was always delivered _after_ his table mates had nearly finished with their orders. He never received a refill unless he asked specifically, his chair was almost always bumped or jostled “accidently” as he ate. It was passive aggressive warfare. Not at all what Helena was used to, but she joined in on it. Whenever he would tell her something snarky, she had a quick come back that left him baffled, wondering what she just said as his friends laughed in his expanse.

When he finally complained to Leena, she told him if he had a problem, he could stop eating there every day. There was a mini celebration when he stopped showing up and the other staff began to treat her as an equal, having beat her first pain in the ass customer. Suddenly, she had more… well not exactly _friends_ , but people she could stand to talk to on a daily basis.

And she had been speaking to Leena a lot more. About her growing stress over money and Christina. About her hatred for her ex. About her ridiculous course load. About her lack of sleep. About Myka…

As promised, Leena didn’t act like a therapist for Helena, but she did advise her a lot. Drop a few classes, choice hours for the diner, assurance that yes Nate was an awful person, to go to bed at an earlier time and stop drinking so much coffee. And she was trying to get Helena to confess her love for Myka aloud without telling her to do so.

Helena just spent so much time gushing over whatever she and Myka did together that it was obvious to pretty much everyone who worked with her. The other wait staff actually had a pool going, seeing how long it would be before Helena and Myka were a couple.

Helena wasn’t looking forward to a quiet night without her friend or her daughter, so she worked three back to back shifts, only getting away with it because Carl called in sick and they were short staffed for the dinner rush. She kept herself extremely busy the whole time.

So it wasn’t until she returned to her dorm where a mountain of work awaited her, homework and back logged repairs, that she checked her phone. She walked through the door as she frowned at the dead screen of her mobile.

“How long are these things supposed to keep their charge?” She asked her roommate who was sitting at her desk bouncing her foot rapidly, her own repair load forgotten, “Do you think we could fix it to last longer than a single day?”

“Hm?” Claudia snapped her eyes up and they followed her roommates path to her own work station, “What?”

Helena held up her cell for Claudia to see, “This iPhone 5 you made me buy? It’s about as useful as a paperweight right now.” She mumbled as she plugged it into the outlet and the white apple logo appeared.

“Oh, so you haven’t heard from… anybody? All day?” she asked, rising to her feet and worrying her hands in front of her.

“No, I’ve been at Leena’s. Should I have?” She looked at the redhead closely, “What is it, Claudia?”

“Okay don’t hate me,” Her eyes were wide, and she held her hands up to HG in a pacifying manner, “Don’t kill the messenger now, okay?”

“Out with it Claud,” Helena crossed her arms over her chest and glared icily at Claudia.

“Something may,” Claudia took a step back from the chill Helena was emitting, “Or may not, have happened to Myka…”

Helena’s blood froze in her veins, “You have five seconds to explain yourself Claudia Donovan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By random coincidence, Fresno State is actually working on Othello to be premiered this spring, so…


	12. Wells and Bering

_... when skies are grey..._

* * *

 

Helena drove like a mad woman, twenty miles over the speed limit, pushing her luck that there seemed to be no California highway patrol officers on duty. But it didn’t seem fast enough. She cut off one car after the other. She was filled with an urgency, keeping one eye on her phone. Waiting from news from Claudia, or even better, from Myka or Pete.

She had finally received the text Myka sent hours ago. _Found something curious. Wish you were here to help. I’ll keep you updated._ Helena wished she hadn’t ignored her phone at work. Maybe then they wouldn’t be in this mess.

Claudia stayed behind to multitask. She felt guilty for her part in Myka becoming involved in Fresno. The computer had pinged in Fresno. Aside from Stacy’s death that afternoon, there was one from a couple weeks ago, in the end of auditions after the cast list was reviled. Dan Gilbert had been with the other cast members, celebrating their rolls. He had been stabbed 23 times, and the Fresno police department called it a mugging gone wrong. There had been one witness, who told police Dan had repeated one line over and over, “ _Et tu, Brute?”_  

When she told Myka, her voice had gotten all high pitched and excited. She told her to send the police report to her tablet and hung up before Claudia could get any more information from her.

Claudia had a bad feeling, and an hour later tried to get a hold of Myka once more, but it kept going straight to voice mail. She had been trying to track it, but the phone was off. She was wishing she had though to put a bug in all of her friends’ phones when HG had returned from Leena’s.

Claudia wasn’t sure if she should worry for her life, or for Helena’s, because when she started to explain Myka’s situation, Helena’s face paled, and she looked like she was going to fall over. HG changed from her uniform, grabbed her keys and was back out the door, ordering Claudia to find Myka and call her when she had.

The techie tried Pete’s phone, but she was having the same problem. She didn’t know what to do. So she began working on rebuilds and fixes for their repair business even though she had nearly finished her load. An hour later and nearly all of the work was finished and she still didn’t know what to do.

Steve knocked on the door before walking in. He had a long day. Classes and his own job with campus security had kept him busy. His only break he had to use to take Christina a happy meal for lunch because her dad still had yet to recover from the night before. He wanted to lay down and complain to his best friend.

But when he found a stressed Claudia, he knew he was in for a long night.

“I can’t find them!” she declared, “Not Pete or Myka, their phones are off line! HG is going to kill me! Where are they?”

“Whoa, calm down, Claud,” Steve stood behind her and looked at the computer, though he could really understand what he was seeing, “What’s the problem?”

“Myka’s after a curiosity,” Claudia said after a deep breath, “I think she got into trouble, because her phone is dead, and so is Pete’s. I need to find them, Jinksy. How do I find them?”

“Okay, they’re visiting Kurt and Amanda, right?” Steve tried to speak slowly, keep her calm, “Chances are one of them is with Myka and Pete. Try tracking Amanda’s phone instead.”

“You are a genius!” she declared before running her hands over the keyboard, “YES!” she shot her fists in the air as she got a dial tone and the signal was beeping in.

“ _Hey, you’ve reached Amanda. Leave a message or send me a text and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”_ Her voice chimed around them.

“Uh-oh,” Claudia’s face fell.

“What? You can’t track it?” Steve asked.

“No, I got the location,” Claudia sounded very far away, “That’s the problem.”

Steve was the one who had to call HG and tell her where to go, Claudia was unable to think clearly enough, lost in her own anxiety.

The 41 was backed up due to construction, but Helena wasn’t letting that stop her. The phone that lay on the passenger seat began ringing and she made a wild grab for it.

“They’re at Saint Agnes,” Steven sounded somber.

“Where is that?” Helena asked, not quiet processing what that meant.

“It’s a hospital HG, on Fresno Street.”

Helena dropped her phone, and it landed forgotten somewhere on the floorboard. Her foot was heavy on the gas pedal as she pushed her car to move faster through the traffic.

When she finally arrived at the hospital she parked her car- illegally- and tried to figure out where to go next.

Lucky, as she was rushing to the emergency room exit, someone she recognized walked out.

Never before had she been so glad to see Pete Lattimer. But his presence was quickly over looked when Myka was following close behind, grumbling about something to Pete, who seemed to be ignoring her.

Helena rushed forward and practically tackled Myka with a hug, “Oh thank God!” She practically sobbed into the taller woman’s shoulder.

“HG?” Myka sounded surprised, but she didn’t pull away from the embrace, “What are you doing here?”

Helena pulled back, but kept her grip on Myka’s arms, trying to get a better look at her, “Claudia told me she could get a hold of you and panic ensued. Are you alright?” she asked, noting the bruise forming on Myka’s cheek bone as well as her wrapped wrist.

“I’m fine, this is nothing.” She rolled her eyes and gestured to her injuries.

“It’s not nothing, Myka, you’re hurt!” Helena looked to be on the verge of tears as she gently cupped Myka’s face, her thumb bruising against the discoloration it found there, and Myka’s breathing hitched, “I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you. God, I would probably completely lose my mind.”

“I’m okay, HG.” Myka insisted weakly, though her wrist was throbbing now that the pain killers were wearing off, “Honestly, I didn’t even want to go to the hospital, Pete and Amanda insisted.”

“Myka, you were on the floor, not moving!” Pete protested as he moved to stand beside the girls, waiting for Amanda to bring her car around.

“What happened?” Helena demanded, her eyes sparking.

The proximity of HG’s face to her own made Myka feel like she was on drugs again, and she scrambled for words. Anything to distract from the butterflies in her stomach.

“Well…”

* * *

After her second conversation with Claudia, Myka moved back stage to catch Pete up.

“Okay, so there is definitely something strange going on here,” Pete declared in a whisper, “Any ideas, human encyclopedia?”

“Actually yeah,” Myka nodded, “The two victims both uttered the dying words from different plays, both written by William Shakespeare. I _think_ it has something to do with his lost folio.”

“His what now?” Pete asked.

There was a commotion on stage that interrupted Myka’s explanation.

Nearly all of the actors, and most of the stage hands, were gathered on the stage, standing around the pacing director who was shouting at them.

“Yes! It is a terrible, sad, thing that has happened to Tracy!”

“Stacy,” the assistant director corrected him softly.

“Whatever,” the director waved her off, “But the show must go on! Stacy would want us to continue with our diligent practicing and put on the best adaption of Othello that has yet to be seen! Where is my understudy?”

“Here I am.” A girl stepped boldly forward.

“Do you know your lines?” he waited for the new girl to nod, “Good! Let’s start from the top! Where is my Rodrigo?” he demanded.

Everyone looked around, none apparently finding him, “RODRIGO!” the director barked loudly.

There was a commotion at the opposite end of the stage, and Myka found herself moving forward to hear better. Just then, the man playing Rodrigo pushed his way through the crowd, gripping at the collar of his shirt and sputtering uselessly as his face turned blue.

He collapsed in the middle of the crowd, staring blankly at the ceiling, and whispered softly, “ _Commend me to my kind lord: Oh, farewell_.”

“Isn’t that my line?” the new actress looked around for someone to explain what was happening.

The actor playing Iago knelt forward to shake the unresponsive man, whose head lolled uselessly from side to side. He felt for a pulse. “Oh my god, Rick is dead!” he stumbled back from him, trying to scramble to his feet, “I’m getting out of here!” he began to shove his way between people, and mob mentality took over.

Myka was shoved to the ground as the actors and stage hands rushed in a stampede to get away from the newest dead body. She tried to regain her footing, but a boot connected with her cheek bone and everything went dark.

* * *

“And then I woke up in the car, Amanda was driving me to the Emergency room while Pete sat in the back with me. I have a black eye, bruised collar bone and sprained wrist. But that’s it. I’m fine.” Myka insisted again, only now she was in Helena’s passenger seat as they followed Amanda to her apartment, “My phone got trampled.” She mumbled as she looked down at the cracked screen.

“As did your body!” Helena scoffed, “or have you forgotten? Myka, what were you thinking?”

“I was thinking that there was a dangerous thing hurting people and I needed to get it before another person died.” Myka mumbled.

“Myka,” HG shook her head, “From now on, you are not allowed to go after curiosities or murderers without me there, alright? My mental health depends on knowing that you are alright when I am not there to see you.”

Myka grumbled in agreement, but was secretly pleased with the concern she felt from Helena.

“So, this _folio_ you were trying to tell Pete about.” Helena said after a moment, knowing that Myka wouldn’t rest until the case was solved, and the fastest way to get that done was to help her.

“Can we stop at a library? There’s something I need to look at.” Myka said thoughtfully.

“I don’t know…? I’ve never been to Fresno before.” HG shook her head.

“It’s okay, I’ll look up directions,” she grabbed Helena’s phone from the middle console, and paused for a moment when she saw Helena’s iPhone wall paper was a picture of Myka and Christina laughing together in the middle of a tickle fight. She shook her head and opened up the MapQuest app.

Amanda and Pete didn’t notice until they arrived back at her home that Helena’s car no longer tailed them. Pete’s text to Helena’s phone went ignored since they were in the library, currently looking at a massive tome.

“Shakespeare’s lost folio,” Myka explained, “this is a reprint, and the real one went missing 400 years ago. It was given to him by a scored actor who couldn’t ever remember any of his lines. It was linked to several mysterious deaths, and the legend is that it’s cursed.”

“Legends and curses,” HG shook her head, “I don’t think I will ever grow used to this. But I did miss it.”

“Look, the three actors all said the final lines of these characters, Dan quoted Julius Cesar, ‘ _Et tu, Brute,’_ and he ended up being stabbed 23 times. Stacy gave Cleopatra’s final words, ‘ _Oh Antony..nay..I will take thee too,_ ’ and the EMT’s said something about snakebites before taking her away. And the last guy quoted Desmonda after he was acting as if being suffocated!” Myka worked to keep her voice low as she began to get excited.

Helena used the excuse of getting a better look at the folio to lean closer to Myka, how started slightly and dropped the book to the floor. They bent at the same time to retrieve it, and a worn piece of printer paper fell from between the pages.

“Look, someone’s been researching the lost folio.” Myka held the paper up for Helena to read.

“ _The first errant fool that touches the page shall loos'th himself in the image therein and shall be cursed to live the death that is therein depicteth. Yet, he who utters the dying breath may then be spared the errant death, but breath be spoke before the flame or death shall take him all the same_.” She read carefully, “Flames?”

“Oh my god,” Myka shook her head, “There was a small fire back stage just as Stacy died. They said it was a-uh electrical malfunction or something, so I didn’t think much of it. But this is saying that each of our victims had received a page form the lost folio, and when they touched it, they were set to die the same way as these characters!”

“And that’s why they all spoke the dying words, but it wasn’t soon enough and they died.” Myka’s excitement was spreading, “But who would want to kill a bunch of college actors?”

 “Okay, we need to get back to the theater,” Myka shut the book, “Call Claudia, see if she can’t find a pattern while we drive. We have to figure out who’s doing this before they kill another person.”

They put the book back on the shelf before hurrying to the car. Myka drove while Helena called Claudia. It was getting really late, nearly midnight, but that didn’t seem to effect the amount of people still out, and cars still filled the college campus.

“Oh my God, is Myka okay? Pete?  Did you find them?” Claudia’s voice spilled from the small speaker.

“I’m fine Claud.” Myka assured her.

“Squeal of delight,” Claudia sighed.

“We need you to search up a couple of people,” HG interrupted the techies rant or relief, “Tell us what they have in common.”

“Oh, we’re back on the case? Sweet! Give me the names.” They heard her begin to type away as they listed them.

“Let’s see,” She said, “Well, they were all in the drama department of Fresno State, but we already knew that. They all had rolls in the Company’s production of Othello this season, as well as The Odd Couple last year. They are well liked, but it looks like they are trouble makers. Using improve when they forget their lines.”

Helena and Myka looked to one another, “Thanks Claud.”

“You two just figured something out, didn’t you?” they could hear Claudia’s smile.

“Maybe,” Myka said, “We’ll let you know.”

“Hey, I left one of my teslas in the trunk of your car, HG,” Claudia said, “bring it with you guys, just in case.”

When they arrived at the theater, they pause for a moment in the quiet to think, “Who would want to kill actors?” Helena repeated the earlier question.

“Not even very good actors,” Myka added, “They couldn’t remmebr their lines.”

“That would drive a writer insane,” HG agreed, “But he’s been dead a few years now.”

Myka rolled her eyes but froze, thinking back through the day, “Not just the writer.”

“The director.” Helena’s eyes met Myka’s and both girls smiled, “Look at us. Just like old times, Wells and Bering, solving puzzles and saving the day.”

“Bering and Wells.” Myka smirked and HG shrugged.

Helena grabbed the gun from the trunk of her car, and she and Myka moved carefully through the parking lot and the theater.

They found the director in his office, going through his mail.

Helena tucked the tesla in the back of her jeans for the time being as they entered.

“What do you want, can’t you see I’m busy?” he growled without looking at them.

“Professor Tully?” Myka kept her voice even, “We know what you’re doing.”

“Oh? And what is that?” he rose a challenging eye brow at them now.

“You’re killing your actors.” HG declared.

“Why the hell would I do that?” He demanded, “You know how much of a pain in the ass today has been because of those damn deaths?”

“Because they couldn’t remember their lines,” Myka pointed out, “They were ruining your play.”

“Ruining it?” he scoffed, “Their families where the one bank rolling this production! With them gone, I need to find more benefactors or else they’ll have to kill the play!”

Helena and Myka looked at each other. If it wasn’t the director, who was it? Who else cared about actors messing up their lines?

The professor opened the next envelope on his desk and looked down confused. He spasamed and the paper fell from his hands, a look of pain crossed his face and he began coughing.

“Oh no,” Myka rushed around the desk to his side. The professor wasn’t the murderer, he was a target. She looked down at the page he dropped, her brain rushing to remember the play it was from, who it was and what their final words were. “Cladius! From Hamlet! Let’s see… uh…” she began to panic and looked up for help from Helena. But she had run off, catching a glimpse of a fleeing figure.

She closed her eyes and focused, “Oh, yet defend me friends! I am but hurt! Say it!” She ordered him, “Say it now! _Oh, yet defend me friends! I am but hurt!”_

The professor choked the words out just before the page caught flame. She didn’t stay to make sure he was okay, she went after Helena.

HG had the woman cornered, tesla held level when Myka found her, “Where’s the folio?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” she insisted.

“Hey, I know you!” Myka declared, “You’re the assistant director!”

“Carla,” her face showed contempt for a moment, one day people would know her name, she would be more than an assistant.

“Why would you want to kill the actors?” Myka asked, confused, “What did they ever do to yo? And why Professor Tully?”

“They were ruining my play!” she declared finally, “They couldn’t stick to the damn script! And Tully was enabling them just because their rich mommies and daddies were paying him to!”

“So you killed them?” HG pulled back slightly.

“You need the perfect cast to make the perfect play,” she explained, “Their so called understudies are twice the actors that they were! And I am twice the director that that fool Tully was!” she grabbed a board form behind her and threw it at Myka and HG.

Both women ducked, and Carla ran out the side door. Myka and HG were quick to follow her, but pulled up short when they reached the corner she ran around. Carla stood, her arms held above her head as two people in suits stood pointing guns at her.

Helena recognized them and quickly grabbed Myka’s hand and yanked her back.

“Carla Diaz!” Raymond called out, “Secret service! Keep your hands up!”

“We’ve got to go, now.” Helena urged quietly as she pulled Myka at a run back to the parking lot, “Hurry, those are the agents!”

They were panting at they drove away, trying not to draw attention to themselves. “We need to go back to Fairview and as far away from those agents as possible.” Helena declared.

Myka simply nodded, “Okay, but you have to go to the fraternities, I need to get my bag from Kurt’s, and we have to call Pete.”

Myka caught up her best friend as she and Helena made their way to Kurt’s building. He was staying until Monday still. Glad the curiosity was dealt with, and unworried by the agents, since they only knew Myka and HG. He wasn’t ready to leave his girlfriend once more.

“Myka!” Kurt greeted as HG and she walked into a party, still in full swing at their frat house, “Where have you been, Bunny? HG? What are you doing here?”

“Hey Kurt,” Myka kissed him and HG looked away, “I’ve got to go home a little early. Something’s come up with one of my classes.”

Kurt frowned as he followed the girls up the stairs to his room, “What? No, you need to stay!”

“I can’t Kurt,” she grabbed her bag from the floor, and put her things in there as quickly as possible.

“Bunny,” He chided, “Bunny, stop. You need to talk to me!” he grabbed her wrist and yanked her to a stop as she went to move around.

She bit back a cry of pain and Helena cried out in protest. Kurt dropped her hand as if it was on fire. “Sorry, I just need to talk to you.” He shot a fuming HG a look, “Alone.”

HG crossed her arms, fully prepared to stay exactly where she was, but Myka nodded to her. Helena kept her glare up as she walked backwards into the hallway, and Kurt shut the door on her face.

“What is going on?” he asked Myka, “What is HG doing here? Where have you been all day?”

“I was at the theater with Pete and Amanda,” Myka was scrambling for an excuse, but her face showed none of her distress, “There was an accident and I hurt myself, busted my phone. There was a miscommunication and Helena thought I was seriously hurt at the hospital, so she drove down to make sure I was okay since she couldn’t get a hold of me.”

“Why do you have to leave? This is supposed to be our weekend!” he complained, and didn’t even try to ask if Myka was okay.

“I know, but something came up…” Myka tried again.

“Did you even try to get out of it?” he demanded, “Don’t you _want_ to spend time with me anymore? Myka, we haven’t even had sex in a month. A _month_ , Mykes! It’s like you don’t even care about me anymore.”

“Kurt,” Myka tried, a small pain blossoming in her chest.

“No, Myka.” Kurt shook his head, “Forget it, go home with your friend. I have a party to get back to. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

He stormed out of his own room, pushing past HG.

“Are you alright, darling?” she asked softly when Myka made no attempt to move.

“I’m fine.” She said curtly before grabbing the last of her possessions. “Let’s just get out of here.”

It was a long, quiet ride home. 


	13. Be Happy

_...  you'll never know dear..._

* * *

 

Myka was high as a kite.

She had a splitting head ache, and her concussion kept her from sleeping it off when Helena had dropped her off at her apartment. She tried to get HG to stay the night with her, but the woman refused. Stating she had far too much work that needed to be done. Myka didn’t think to argue that it was three in the morning and HG was clearly exhausted.

So she kept herself awake by writing another chapter to her book. Or four. The Vicodin kept her from remembering exactly _what_ she wrote down through the early morning hours. The sun was up and her pain killers had worn off.

She took a shower that was hotter than necessary. Kept an ice pack on her face. Reminding herself that she was capable of feeling.

Why then did she feel numb on the inside?

She popped another pill. Her wrist was throbbing almost as much as her head.

She called Pete’s cellphone, forgetting he had ruined it the day before by dropping it into a bucket of paint. She rolled her eyes at the sound of his voice mail and proceeded to leave the longest voicemail Pete would ever receive, and that included the time he had lost his phone in high school and his mother had been furious with him.

“Look Pete, I’m going through a crisis, and it would be really great if my supposed best friend would stop screwing his girlfriend for five seconds to answer his phone!” she slurred angrily around words that took on weird shapes in her mouth, “Kurt broke up with me, I think.”

She fell heavily on the couch, wondering where Steve was, “I’m not really sure, it’s all a bit fuzzy. The problem is, I don’t know how I feel about it. I mean, I should feel _something_ , right? Sad or heartbroken… but it just feels like another lonely Sunday morning. I need you to tell me what to do, Pete.” Her voice broke.

 “You were with me after Sam died and I shut down,” she remembered, “I was numb then too, but that was with sadness. You were there and told me it was okay to feel like I did. I need you here now to tell me how I should feel now. I don’t understand what I’m supposed to do now.”

 _“The mail box is now full, good bye.”_ The electronic voice told her before disconnecting the line.

Myka dropped the phone on her chest and sighed, staring up at the ceiling. Watching the fan make its revolution for a good twenty minutes before she moved again. She was going to go crazy, she had to talk to _somebody._ She needed to figure out what was going on inside her own head, inside her own heart.

She searched the apartment for her keys, forgetting she put them in the ice tray in the freezer so she wouldn’t take her car anywhere while she had the Vicodin. She gave a frustrated sigh before deciding to walk. Remembering at the last minute to put pants on.

Everyone ignored her as she stomped her way to the campus, talking lowly to herself. She wasn’t aware where she was going until she found herself standing in the door way of the Red Couch.

“Myka,” Abigale looked up from the book open in front of her on the counter, “I didn’t expect you back until tomorrow, how was Fresno?”

“That’s what I’m here to talk about.” Myka worked to stay focused on Abigale, though the woman was getting a little blurry around the edges, “I think I need my therapist. Yes.”

“Myka, are you stoned?” Abigale smirked as she moved around the counter to stabilize her assistant.

“No!” Myka shook her head, making herself dizzy, “Maybe… a little… My wrist hurt and the doctor gave it to me.” She explained.

“Come on, let’s get you laid down.” She took her back to the office she saw students in, setting her gently on the comfortable couch in there.

As soon as Myka lay her head down, she was asleep. Dr. Cho chuckled and looked her over, noting the bruising on her face and the wrapped wrist. She checked on her every half hour until she stirred around noon.

“How are you feeling?” Abagail asked softly as she handed Myka a glass of water, which she drank greedily.

“Really confused.” Myka sighed.

“Well, you were a little… off when you arrived this morning.” Abigale allowed.

“No I remember that part… My trip to see Kurt.” Myka relaxed back into the chair, and Abigale moved to offer her a few cookies that normally Myka would have refused, because they had too much sugar.

“Ah,” Abigale nodded, “What happened?”

“It was… fine?” Myka offered.

“Fine?” Abigale rose an eyebrow, “I know that fine hardly ever really means fine. Tell me what happened.”

Myka gave her an iced over version of the previous day’s events, leaving out the part where she went after a curiosity with HG, but leaving in her confrontation with Kurt.

“So, you and Kurt haven’t been intimate in a month?” Abigale asked.

Myka blushed. Of course _that’s_ the part she would ask about. “It wasn’t as if we did a whole lot of it before. And it wasn’t part of our relationship I really liked. I only ever slept with him to make him happy.”

“And what changed over the last few weeks?” Abigale thought she knew, but wanted Myka to come to the realization on her own.

“I don’t know.” She shrugged, “I came up with excuses, you know ‘ _oh I’m on my period_ ’ or the ever famous ‘ _I have a head ache_ ’. He was cool with it, understanding. But apparently not as much as I thought.”

“If you were doing it to make him happy, what happened to make you stop?” Abigale pushed.

“I don’t know,” Myka insisted, “it wasn’t exactly as if I ever really looked forward to it. I mean, I don’t have a vast knowledge of sex, but I’m sure he was mediocre at best. And suddenly, the thought of having sex with him frustrated me.”

“Why do you think that is?” Abigale asked, “What has changed in the last month?”

“Well, we went back to school.” Myka allowed, “And while I wanted to be with him over summer, now that we’re apart, it’s hard to look forward to seeing him.”

“What else is new Myka?” She could see the younger woman wasn’t getting it, “Think about it, Helena also came back, and then you started to avoid your boyfriend, and your guys’ relationship started getting rocky.”

“You think Kurt had an issue with HG?” Myka was being dense, avoiding the creeping truth trying to make itself known in her.

“I think,” Abigale clapped her hands, “That you and HG need to sit down and have a conversation about the relationship you have.”

“What?” Myka pulled back, “Why?”

“You and HG are friends, you trust her?” She asked.

“Of course I trust her.” Myka nodded.

“Then she is the one you need to talk to.” Abigale insisted.

Myka left feeling more confused than when she went to talk to her boss. “Some therapist she is,” she mumbled to herself. But she took Abigale’s words seriously and went to find Helena.

* * *

Helena didn’t want to stay over at Myka’s for one simple reason. She didn’t know how many more times she could share a bed with inebriated Myka and not make a move. And she knew Myka was having her own conflicting issues, and she didn’t want to add to it.

So she checked on her daughter, though the girl wouldn’t be up for hours, and it was still Nate’s weekend.

She let herself in to the apartment, quietly removing her shoes and walking through the hall to her daughter’s room. She watched her for a moment from the doorway. A flashlight sat still turned on rolling on the floor slightly, a book lay open, face down on her chest.

Helena removed he book and turned off the torch. She put the book mark back between the pages of Alice in Wonderland and set it in its place on the shelf. Myka had been reading it with her, but Christina liked going back over the words when she was by herself, trying to teach herself to read.

Helena sighed before getting in the bed next to her daughter. She ran her hands over the soft curls gently as her heart swelled with emotion. She must’ve fallen asleep at some point, because the sun streaming through the blinds woke her up.

She found her daughter facing her, staring intently into her eyes, “You look tired, Mummy.” She commented.

“Mummy is _very_ tired.” Helena admitted, feeling tears rise in her eyes.

“Are you sad, Mummy?” Christina asked softly, and Helena nodded.

Christina wiggled over and wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck, holding her close. “It’ll be okay, Mummy. I know that Dad doesn’t make very good choices, and he makes you sad. But Aunt Claudia makes you laugh. And Myka too, and she takes care of me and you better than Dad can.”

Helena smiled sadly at her daughter, knowing that this was one of the things that caused her the most sadness. That her beautiful, innocent four year old daughter could see things better than the adults in her life. “Let’s see about getting you some breakfast.”

“Not Lucky Charms, okay? I’ve had too many Lucky Charms.” She shuttered slightly in horror at the thought of eating another bowl.

“Of course, darling,” Helena chuckled, “Let’s go see what’s in the cupboards, shall we?”

When HG actually found real food in the refrigerator, her daughter told her that Myka had stopped by on Friday to make sure she had food. Helena loved how smitten Myka had become with her daughter.

Nate woke up to the smell of eggs and bacon. It was the only thing, aside from sex, that woke him up before noon. He was shocked to see his ex-fiancée standing in his kitchen behind the stove, laughing with his daughter over something he missed.

“Hey,” Nate greeted groggily, “What are you doing here so early?”

“It’s nine in the morning, Nate,” HG pointed out without removing her eyes from the skillet, “I would hardly call that early.” She didn’t feel the need to mention that she had arrived at three in the morning.

He grumbled unintelligibly, but quickly shut up when Helena put a plate of food in front of him.

When their plates were cleared and put in the dishwasher and their daughter was temporarily distracted with her imagination, Helena decided it was time to go. She wanted to talk to someone about the emotions she was feeling. And if she didn’t hurry, she might end up trying to confide in her asshole of an ex.

Nate stopped her at the door.

“You know, you don’t _have_ to live in the dorms, Hel,” he pointed out, “You can always stay here with me and Chrissy, there’s more than enough room.”

“Thanks,” Helena opened the door, “But no thanks. I wouldn’t want to murder you in your sleep.”

“Yeah, that would be tragic.” Nate agreed with a smirk.

“Goodbye, Kurt,” Helena shook her head, “I’ll be here to pick up Christina in the morning.”

Helena found herself driving to Leena’s, even though the diner’s proprietor wasn’t really who she wanted to talk to. It was the next best thing.

“Oh, nuh-uh!” Leena greeted her with the shake of her head, “It is your day off, HG, no working.”

Helena smiled, “I’m only here to talk, seek the wisdom of the sixth year psychology major.”

“Well, in that case take a seat,” Leena smiled, “Can I get you anything?”

Helena sat at the empty bar, “A tea would be lovely.”

“So, what’s on your mind?” Leena asked as she placed the seeping liquid before her.

Helena looked into the slowly spreading color rather than at her too perceptive boss, “I’m not sure what to do.”

“What happened?” Leena was worried about the swirling vortex of ickiness that surrounded her friend.

“Myka put herself in a dangerous situation this weekend. I was so terribly worried about her and I went to the valley to be sure she was okay. And we had fun, just like we used to. But then it all went wrong, and Kurt broke things off with her.” Helena took a breath, “And I feel awful, because I was happy for it. Can you believe that? For a moment I was happy that her heart was being broken. How could I have done that?”

“That’s simple enough, you love her.” Leena rolled her eyes, “Love does weird things to us.”

Helena sputtered, looking like a deer in head lights, “What?”

“HG, you are head over heels in love with that girl.” Leena chuckled.

“Am I really that transparent?” she blushed deeply.

“It’s obvious to everyone… except perhaps Myka.” Leena allowed.

“If I love her though, I shouldn’t hope for her unhappiness. That isn’t love, that’s just cruel.” Helena frowned.

“I really think you need to talk to Myka about this.” Leena said sternly.

“I don’t think she wants to talk to me after yesterday.” She mumbled.

“Helena, you are not the reason Myka and Kurt broke up.” Leena put her hand on HG’s, “They had problems that have nothing to do with you.”

“Perhaps,” HG allowed, “But I certainly did not help the situation last night.”

“You came here to get my advice, right?” She demanded, “Then here it is, talk to Myka. Tell her how you feel. Be honest with her. _Talk_ to her, Helena.”

HG nodded in agreement, but made no move to leave. Leena could tell she needed a moment with her thoughts. The only problem was the moment turned into three hours. Helena never moved, didn’t even drink her tea, she just sat lost in her own thoughts. No one bothered her, even the waiters gave her a wide berth.

How would she even approach the topic with Myka?

Her phone chimed, and after Friday’s incident, she pulled it out straight away.

It was a text message from Claudia. _Myka was just here. She wants you to meet her at the swing set in the park._

Helena arrived at the swings first, having been the closer of the two, but Myka wasn’t far behind. Helena smiled her greeting, but made no move to get up as Myka sat in the swing parallel to her own,

“So,” Myka began after a moment, “I’m supposed to talk to you.”

“Oh?” HG asked, “What about?”

Myka hesitated, “Claudia fixed my phone,” she held up her new looking phone for Helena to see, “Like nothing happened. Oh, and Claudia and Steve want to have a fun night tonight, Mario Kart and pizza at my place. Just like the good old days.” She quoted the techie, “Will you come?”

“Of course!” Helena smiled, “If I’m being honest, I would have to admit that I miss the childish tournaments and greasy food.”

“Excellent.” Myka smiled and looked at her tennis shoes.

“But that’s not why we’re here now.” Helena deduced, “So why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”

Myka sighed, “Kurt.” She admitted.

“Ah,” Helena swallowed the spikey feeling clawing its way up her throat, “What about him?”

“I mean, he basically broke up with me right?” Myka said, kicking her feet aimlessly, “And I don’t know how I feel about that. It’s like, I feel detached. In shock. And I have no idea what to do. Do I apologize to him? Do I cry?”

Helena could no longer contain her eye roll or scoff, “You have nothing to apologize for, Myka. And he definitely doesn’t deserve your tears, because he doesn’t deserve you!”

Myka looked shocked at her outburst, but the flood gates were broken, and weeks’ worth of built up frustration at Kurt Smoller was released, “He doesn’t deserve you.”

“Oh? And why not?” Myka demanded angrily.

“Because he’s a dunce!” she barked, “He is a misogynistic moron who goes to parties and thinks allowing himself to be tackled is fun. He doesn’t treat you like a person, Myka, he treats you like an accessory, like property. He doesn’t appreciate all you have to offer this world!”

“Well, you know what, HG? It was him who was there for me when I was falling apart over the summer. And I think he deserves at the very least for me to try and work things out for him!” Myka yelled back.

HG scoffed, “That’s ridiculous,” she turned away from Myka’s anger.

“This was a bad idea,” Myka declared, standing from the swing, “I should have just called him instead, I should have known you wouldn’t understand.”

Myka began to walk away from her to call Kurt, even though he said he would call her.

Helena saw her chance fading and she began to panic. She couldn’t lose this moment, she had to say something to Myka. But what was she supposed to say? Why did words fail her when she most needed them?

“Myka, wait.” HG called softly, finding her feet.

Myka turned back around despite herself. One day, maybe, she would be able to deny Helena what she wanted. Unfortunately today was not that day. Myka’s phone felt heavy in her hand, this was it. She was going to fix things with her boyfriend once and for all, and yet there was a part of her that was insanely happy that Helena had called out for her.

“What?” Myka said impatiently, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

“I have to tell you something,” Helena stepped closer, “It’ll only take a moment I promise.”

Helena appeared nervous, and curiosity struck Myka and she stilled her fidgeting, the feeling overshadowing her earlier annoyance at Helena’s rant.

“I like you.” HG said without preamble, figuring it would be best to be direct, and it worked in taking Myka a little off guard.

Helena let out a short mirthless laugh, it was a sound mixed with relief and annoyance, “That’s putting it rather lightly, I suppose. What I mean to say is I love you.” She met Myka’s eyes briefly as she said it before allowing them to wander once more, “But I don’t expect you to love me back after all I have done and said. And it kills me when we are apart, so I don’t want to scare you away. For now, then, we’ll go with I like you. Excluding my daughter, you are the most important person in the world to me. Your happiness is all I want, Myka. So if this, if _he_ makes you happy, I want you to fight for it.”

Myka was stunned. She couldn’t react at all, this moment felt so surreal. So she didn’t realize HG had pressed her lips to Myka’s cheek until she was already pulling away from her. And by the time she had regained full control over her motor functions, HG was gone, and her phone was ringing, and Kurt’s smiling face staring out of the screen.


	14. Kiss and Make Up

_... how much I love you..._

* * *

 

She missed Kurt’s call watching Helena walk away, so she called him back, sitting heavily on the swing she had only just vacated. She looked to the swaying swing beside her as the dial tone rang in her ear.

“Bunny!” Kurt sighed on the other end, “I’m glad I caught you. Listen, I was talking to my friends, and I think I made a mistake. I want us to be together, Bunny, we just need to talk about this, about how we need to be close like we used to. You just have changed so much…”

“Kurt, Kurt,” Myka cut him off, not wanting to hear him speak anymore, “I can’t do this anymore.”

“What?” He sounded shocked, “Why not, Bunny?”

“First off, Kurt, I really _hate_ that nickname,” Myka pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger, “I wanted to talk to you, I thought I wanted to make things work with you, but- but I realized that I really don’t want to make things work between us. You say that I’ve changed, that I’ve not been myself. When, in reality, the only time I wasn’t myself, was when I _pretended_ to be happy all summer. I’m actually kind of happy now. Or at least, I was.”

There was a pause on the other end of the phone, “There’s someone else, isn’t there?”

“No…” Myka said, but that felt dishonest somehow, “Yes. I don’t know.”

Kurt sighed, “Does he make you happy?”

“Actually, she makes me furious.” Myka growled.

“Oh… _Oh…_ ” Kurt finally understood something, “It was never going to work with us, was it?”

“I really wanted it to,” Myka sighed, “But no.”

“So, you’re gay?” Kurt asked, still a little taken aback by this whole conversation that had not gone as he planned.

“I’m not gay.” Myka rolled her eyes, but she thought of how she felt about Helena, about how she had always felt. _Okay I might be gay,_ she admitted to herself, “I’m confused.” She admitted aloud.

“It’s okay, Myka,” Kurt reassured her, “Just do whatever makes you happy.”

There it was again. Someone telling her to do what would make her happy. The only problem was, she didn’t know what would make her happy. All she felt right now was confusion, that slowly began to give way to anger and annoyance the longer she sat alone with her thoughts.

The sun was setting when she finally moved from the swing, stomping her way home. She was going to have a word with Helena. Who did she think she was? Why would she just drop something like that on Myka and just walk away? And why now? If she had felt like this about Myka for so long, why had she waited to tell her anything?

She was mad that she hadn’t driven her car to Abigale’s, and it was dark by the time she burst through her own front door. Steve and Claudia looked up from the couch at her, Helena was nowhere to be seen.

“Where is she?” Myka demanded, “Where’s HG?”

 _“_ She’s in the dorms I think.” Claudia looked to Steve for help, trying to understand the mood Myka was in, “She wasn’t really feeling up for a night out even though it’s Nate’s night to look after Christina.”

Further angered by the fact that Helena had promised to be there and wasn’t, Myka ripped open the freezer and pulled her keys out. She slammed the front door behind her, ausing Claudia to flinch.

“What was that about?” Steve asked.

“I have no idea.” Claudia shook her head.

Myka drove in a blind rage to the dorms, angry that she had to park rather far away, but the anger was useful. She allowed it to fuel her as she stomped across the quad, up the stairwells, down the hall. It kept her from thinking too long on what she was doing.

Myka hit her fist heavily on the door, her breathing heavy and her hands clenching in an dout of fists.

Helena looked surprised when she pulled open her door, “Myka?”

“We need to talk.” Myka declared before pushingher way into the room _._

“By all means, Myka, do come in.” Helena’s voice was laced with more sarcasm than strictly necessary, but she was trying to cover up the fact that she had been up here crying her eyes out.

Myka began pacing back and forth and it was making HG both dizzy and nervous.

“Look Helena,” Myka breathed and HG felt her heart skip, it was one of the few times she had called her by her first name since she left at the beginning of summer. Something that vaguely felt like hope began to fill her as she closed her eyes briefly, trying to absorb the feeling.

Myka didn’t notice, to wrapped up in her own thoughts, “There’s this thing between us, but we never talk about it. And maybe that’s my fault but I want to talk about it now.”

HG nodded for her to continue, like she had a say in the matter.

“You left.” Myka’s voice cracked, “You got on a plane and you didn’t write or call. You went back to play pretend with your ex-fiancé and you left us behind. You left me behind. And I know you did it because of your daughter, and I love Christina, and I understand why you had to go. But you broke me, and I have to wake up every day and remind myself that not everyone will hurt me like you did.

“So I threw myself into a relationship I thought would help me forget you,” she seemed to be fighting tears, and HG just wanted to pull her to a stop and hold her, but she restrained herself, wrapping her arms tightly around her chest, “Kurt was the opposite of you in every feasible way! And I was doing okay. I was eating again, I was going out, I laughed. And then you showed up and it was all for nothing.

“You looked at me like nothing had changed, that you hadn’t left for three months,” Myka’s anger resurfaced, “Like we were just going out for coffee at Leena’s, like we were who we used to be. And all our flirting and sharing and, god the way you look at me some times is infuriating. I know you know what you’re doing, that look you give me where you’re looking into my eyes, then quickly look down at my lips. That look is going to be the death of me. I don’t know how much more my heart can take, Helena.” She finally stopped, standing less than a foot from HG, and yet the space felt insurmountable.

“I wrote you.” HG spoke softly, but Myka heard every word, “I wrote you every day, sometimes more than once a day, it was the only time I could get peace. I held on to the belief that you were somewhere, reading my words and smiling. There was a hole and I couldn’t figure out what it was. It was you, Myka. I shouldn’t have left, or maybe I should have taken you with me. And I know, alright? I know I fucked up when I left you. And I wish I could take it back, but I know I can’t.”

“Why?” Myka asked, “Tell me why then you would tell me you love me before telling me to fight for him.”

“I told you, Myka,” Her voice cracked, “all I want is for you to be happy.”

“I don’t want to fight for him.” Myka shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts that were becoming so muddled.

“Then what do you want?” Helena demanded, trying not to show how much she was hurting now.

“You!” Myka said, “I want _you_ , but I can’t...” she trailed off.

“That’s why I’m here, trying to be your friend, like we used to be.” Helena wore a look of painful resignation.

“What if I don’t want it to be like we used to be?”

Helena swallowed thickly, “Then, just know, my heart is, and will always be, yours.”

“Sense and sensibility,” Myka shook her head in wonder, “Will you ever stop quoting 19th century literature to me?”

“Would you like me to?” HG was having trouble reading the look in Myka’s eyes now.

“God no.” she breathed before stepping forward, tangling her fingers in those beautiful raven locks and pressing her lips against Helena’s.

After a moment of surprise, she was kissing her back. HG moaned under the pressure, wrapping her arms around the taller woman’s waist and pulling her impossibly closer. She wanted to memorize this moment, this perfect moment. The smell of Myka’s shampoo, something indescribably sweet, the feel of her hands threading through her hair, the heat of their bodies, the taste of her lips… she ran her tongue along Myka’s lower lip to better taste it.

Myka immediately responded, allowing her entrance, though not passively. Months of stored up need was released all at once and Myka bit HG’s lip softly, soothing it with her tongue and loving the way Helena shuddered at the feeling.

HG’s knees gave out, and she was lucky they somehow made it to the bed and Myka let her down softly, following after her. Helena reveled in the weight pressing on her, allowing her hands to travel from Myka’s hips slowly, under her shirt, allowing her fingers to brush against the overheated skin along Myka’s ribs.

Myka moaned Helena’s name into her hair as she pulled away from their kiss. And Helena would have given anything to hear it again and again.

Much to HG’s dismay, the warmth of Myka disappeared as she stood up. She rose up on her elbows and watched the curly haired brunette rub her hands over her eyes roughly, her breathing still erratic. Helena knew that if she reached out and pulled Myka back down to her, it would all be over for Myka’s self-restraint.

“I can’t.” Myka’s voice was low, and it made HG bite her lip, “I can’t do this, not yet.” She finally opened her eyes and saw how dark Helena’s had become with want. She wanted to take a step back from the tempting bed, but her body fought to stand still.

“And why is that?” HG rose up to her knees, reaching out, grabbing the collar of Myka’s shirt and pulling her forward, “Has the whole world not been waiting for this very moment?”

“Yes?” Myka wasn’t even paying attention to the words HG was saying, far more entranced by the accent that had grown thick with Helena’s desire, too deliciously distracted by the way her red lips seemed to dance over the words.

She was kissing her again before she realized what was happening. And she was so close to giving in, but she couldn’t.

“No,” Myka pulled back, and HG used the opportunity to leave a trail of wet kisses from Myka’s jaw, down her neck, before placing a soft bite on her shoulder, “Helena, if you don’t stop I’m not going to be able to think clearly for much longer.”

“I fail to see an issue here,” she trailed her fingers down Myka’s spine as she worked her way back up the path she just left.

“The issue is,” Myka paused to catch her breath, “I’d really like to, I don’t know, take you on a date before we do this?” she blushed and Helena stopped her kissing, pulling back to look into those ever distracting summer green eyes of hers,  “I don’t want this to be our relationship. I want it all with you HG, the awkward first date, the cheesiness that makes our friends sick… I don’t want this to be our first time. I need for it to be perfect.”

Helena wanted to argue that just being with Myka would make it perfect for her, but she didn’t. Instead, she smiled and placed a soft kiss on Myka’s lips once more, “Alright, darling.”

“And I think I need to go before I lose all sense of self-control.” Myka sighed.

Helena nodded as she rose from the bed, walking with her to the door of her dorm room.

They had an extended kiss good bye, so very close to just walking back to the bed and picking up where they left off.

As Myka walked the stairs down alone, she felt both lighter and yet more fulfilled. The butterflies were at full riot in her stomach and she found herself touching the places HG’s lips had been. She couldn’t seem to wipe the smile from her face.

Perhaps it was this distraction that kept her from noticing the dark form that pulled away from the shadows as she left the dorm. Looking back, maybe walking alone in the darkness hadn’t been her smartest move. How could she have predicted Walter Sykes ambushing her?

She hadn’t spared the pre-med student a single thought since they solved the mystery of his key.

He shoved her roughly from behind and she tumbled to the ground, not expecting it, too lost in lustful thoughts. She rolled, putting her hands up when she was met with the barrel of the gun.

“Where is it?” he demanded, his hand trembling slightly.

“What?” Myka asked, unable to catch up to this sudden turn of events.

“My key!” he barked, “The one you stole from me in the library, you bitch! You ruined my life, you know, that day you and your friends stole what was rightfully mine. I want it back, and you’re going to give it to me.”

Myka grabbed the front of her shirt, feeling the familiar weight of the key she had worn every day since Helena had given it to her. She wanted to rip it off and give it to him, anything to get him to put the gun away, but she hesitated, this key represented the world of endless wonder that she had been introduced to, and it was so difficult to simply throw that away. It was the same reason she hadn’t stored it away in a box with all of the other memories from that time.

That split second was a mistake.

Sykes dishwater blue eyes zeroed in on her movement and he grimaced, mistaking her grabbing hands as a refusal to hand it over. His finger squeezed the trigger.

The sound was surprisingly loud. That’s what Myka noticed. Followed by the intense pain as the bullet ripped through her. If she cried out in pain, she couldn’t tell. She was suddenly laying back on the ground, staring at the stars, thinking of when she and Helena had stayed up half the night finding constellations. It was such a good memory, and she held on to it with all her might as darkness filled her vision and Walter Sykes tore the silver chain from around her neck.

Her last wish before the darkness consumed her, was that she hadn’t been such a perfectionist. That she had given in to what she wanted so badly. Not tonight, but the first time Myka had ever seen HG. Looking beautiful in her light blue button down shirt tucked in with a waist coat buttoned. A hand running through those gorgeous locks of hers, shorter then, but as dark and amazing as ever. Her teeth worrying her lower lip as she looked from a schedule to a building and back. She wished she had closed her book and walked to her then. Introduced herself and skipped all the craziness of the two years that followed.

It seemed unfair that she had gotten so little time with Helena. But she thanked whatever god was listening that she got the time she did. That she got to kiss her at least once.


	15. Extortion at its Finest

_... please don't take my sunshine away_

* * *

 

Helena leaned against the closed door for a moment, hand on her chest, feeling her heart race beneath her palm. She couldn’t seem to stop smiling. She had done it. She had finally told Myka she loved her. And though it was messy and rushed, it turned out to be exactly what they needed.

Her lips tingled from the memory of another’s, and it felt as if she had sunshine leaking from her fingertips. And it was all Myka’s.

 _Myka kissed me,_ she giggled to herself as she twirled around her room. She wanted to be with her, wanted to kiss her again and again. Tonight was not enough. They could have forever and it still would not be enough.

For the first time that HG could remember, the future didn’t seem so dark, because she would have Myka by her side.

The sharp sound of a reverberating bang that echoed around the quad startled Helena from her pink haze of happy as she flinched instinctively away from the window.

After only a moment’s hesitation, Helena crept to the window overlooking the front of the building. A dark figure was hurrying away, and a slightly smaller mass lay crumpled in the light of the sidewalk lamp.

Dread filled her suddenly as she tried to convince herself that she did not recognize the halo of dark hair, or the outfit on the motionless girl. Helena tossed stuff carelessly around on Claudia’s side of the room until she found the weapon she sought. She didn’t bother with shoes, and she didn’t care that she was dressed in her bed clothes. All Helena focused on was the weight of the tesla in her hand, the motion of rapidly putting one foot in front of the other until she reached the ground floor of the dormitories.

She sprinted the last ten yards separating her from heart break, confirming her worst fears.

“No!” She cried out in protest as she fell hard to her knees beside Myka’s blood drenched body, “Myka? Myka, please!” she sobbed.

HG was afraid to touch her at first, afraid she would discover this was not just some nightmare. But she quickly got over herself when Myka slowly blinked, and she noticed the ever so slight rise and fall of her chest.

Helena put her hands on Myka’s chest now, where she thought the source of all the blood was. But it didn’t seem to be helping. She looked around madly.

“Ho-hold on, Myka,” HG scrambled to the light post four feet away, her hand fell repeatedly on the red emergency button that was supposed to connect her directly to the Fairview police department.*

Crackling emanated from the speaker as the bright blue light atop the lamp began flashing insistently. Helena took that as a good sign and hurried back to trying to staunch the bleeding. But the blood was beginning to seep between her fingers, and Myka was getting paler by the second.

Myka’s eyes, which had been staring blankly are the night sky, slowly shifted to focus on Helena’s panic and fear filled face. She needed to say something, Helena looked so scared, she needed to comfort her, that was what she was supposed to do. But she needed to know…

“You look scared,” Myka croaked. She coughed to clear her throat, and the taste of rust filled her mouth, “It’s bad isn’t it?” She thought she would be in more pain, she was just shot after all. But all she could notice was feeling slowly leaving her hands and feet, her head growing light and her chest felt heavy.

Helena used one of her hands to try and wipe the blood that bubbled at the corner of Myka’s mouth, “It’s going to be okay.” Helena argued, more with herself then with Myka. Myka wasn’t really listening anyway. She was staring at Helena’s face, hoping to memorize it one more time.

“ _Fairview Emergency Response._ ” The voice cracked out of the speaker.

“Yes! Help me, please!” Helena yelled at the light pole, “My friend, she’s been shot, you have to hurry!”

“ _Okay, an ambulance is on its way_ ,” the woman reassured her, “ _Is your friend conscious? Where are you?_ ”

“We’re in front of the dormitories on the university campus,” she sobbed, glancing down at Myka, her green eyes fading in and out of focus even as they held steady on Helena, “She’s awake… but there’s so much blood, please hurry!”

“ _Okay, sweetie, here’s what I need- what_ she _needs for you to do, you have to find a way to slow the bleeding, okay?_ ” She kept her voice calm, trained to talk people through what needed to be done even while they were falling apart, “ _Use a t-shirt or a jacket, something as padding. You need to keep pressure on the wound._ ”

Helena ripped away her top shirt, balled it up and used it to push down on the wound. She knew this was what she was supposed to do, how could she not have remembered that?

Myka groaned in pain, finally feeling it once more, but it served to rouse her a bit. Everything was still fuzzy around the edges of her vision slowly growing dark once more, but there was something left in her needing to be free. There was something the woman sobbing over her had yet to hear. Myka knew she couldn’t die leaving it unsaid.

It took an incredible amount of strength, but Myka lifted her hand, bringing it to rest on Helena’s face. It trembled slightly, but Helena leaned into the touch. Myka was struggling to bring in a breath, and she wasn’t sure how many she had left, so she would make sure she made this one count.

“I love you.” Her voice was weak, but her eyes held all the intensity she felt behind the words as she willed HG to believe her.

“Don’t, Myka,” Helena spoek between her teeth, trying to be forceful while her breath hitched with an unending torrent of tears, “Don’t say it like you’re saying goodbye. _We_ never say goodbye, that isn’t us.” She shook her head.

Myka smiled as she caught the scent of it, “…apples…” her eyelids began to droop. She was struggling to hold on now, and though she could hear the approaching sirens, she knew she was out of time, “Thank you,” was all she was able to mumble before her eyes fluttered shut and her hand fell limply to the ground.

“Don’t you die on my, Myka Ophelia Bering!” Helena shouted, “Please, Myka, please stay with me, _please_ wake up! Help!” She cried out, “Somebody help me, please!”

An ambulance squealed to a stop on the sidewalk beside Helena, and thirty miles away, as an EMT pushed HG out of the way, a seasoned 911 operator began to cry.

The paramedic’s hand went to the unconscious woman’s neck, “I’ve got a pulse!” she called out, not mentioning how weak and thready it was, “We’ve got to get her out of here _now._ ”

Helena insisted she ride in the ambulance with Myka, and there was just enough crazy in her eye that neither paramedic dared argue with her.

Myka’s heart gave out three miles from Fairview General, the EMT was still straddling her doing chest compressions as she was wheeled though the emergency bay. Helena kept up with the stretcher, tuning out shouts from the orderlies, nurses and doctors about a single gunshot wound to the chest and calling for an OR to be opened.

When they arrived at a set of double doors, they pushed Myka through, but stopped HG.

“This is as far as you go,” the nurse’s voice was stern, his demeanor calm, and it pulled Helena up short.

“Please,” she begged, “I’m… she’s my…”

“She’s in good hands,” He assured her, “But you have to wait here, now.” He pointed her to a room full of uncomfortable looking chairs.

Helena nodded, shuffling over to one corner of the room.

The walls were the ugliest shade of pale green imaginable. The marble floor may have been white once upon a time, but years of scuffs and stains turned it to a greyish yellow. It all turned her stomach to rot.

Numbness was her only defense, it seemed, and she allowed it to take over as she replayed the events of the evening over and over again. She was trying to figure out how it all got so messed up so fast. Hadn’t she just been kissing Myka in her room? Weren’t they just blissfully happy? What happened?

She didn’t realize she had called anyone until Claudia repeated, “ _Hello?!”_  in her ear. All she noticed was she was suddenly standing at the phones in the corner. When had she stood up? How much time had passed?

“Claudia?” she couldn’t even recognize her own voice.

“HG?” the techie looked down at her phone, “Where are you calling me from?”

“The hospital.” It was somewhere between a sob and a croak that came out in a near whisper.

“What? Why?” she demanded, “Steve! Steve get up!”

“Myka,” why had everything suddenly become so blurry? Why were her cheeks wet?

“Myka?” Claudia was looking for her other shoe, her urgency alerting Steve, finally waking him up all the way, “What about Myka? What happened?” Claudia’s heart twisted painfully.

 _Car wreck, please don’t say car wreck, anything else,_ she begged silently. She wouldn’t be able to handle it if she lost another family member behind the wheel of a car. Myka had taken off in such a hurry, what if…?

“She’s been shot.” Helena felt as if it was someone else entirely speaking.

 _I take it back, oh God, I take it back_. Claudia’s legs gave out and she fell in a heap on the floor, “Shot… shot…” she mumbled over and over.

Steve pried the phone from her hands, “Are you at Fairview General?”

“Yes…” Helena looked lazily around, “I’m in the waiting room.”

“I’ll call Pete.” His voice became an anchor to reality for both women listening, “We are on our way. We’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Helena held the dead phone to her ear for another minute before she wound her way back to the thread bare chairs.

She became lost in a fog of despair, staring at her warped reflection in the tile. Black shoes entered her line of sight.

“Ma’am?” a gruff voice called for her attention.

Helena was slow to react, her eyes moved over the pressed navy blue uniform of the police officer. His black hair was greying at the temples, his grey eyes careful, his face cleanly shaven aside from the obligatory mustache.

“You’re the one who called in about the gunshot victim, correct?” he pressed once they met eyes.

“Yes?” Helena responded.

“I need to ask you a few questions,” he pulled out a small spiral bound note book, pulling a pen form somewhere HG didn’t see and continued without waiting for a response, “What’s your name?”

“Helena Wells.” She answered, looking at the floor once more.

“Explain to me what happened. What did you see?” he asked.

“I was in my room…” Suspicion was growing in Helena as she recounted aloud the facts she had been going over, “I heard a gunshot… I ran outside…”

“You ran out side?” he interrupted, “Why would you do that?”

“Myka had just left my room, and after the noise, I looked out my window and saw her on the ground, someone was rushing away.”

“So the victim was with you right before the incident?” He pressed, “Tell me what your relationship with the victim is.”

“We’re friends,” she looked up at him as he scribbled away, “We were talking before, she decided to go home.”

“So, you say you saw someone fleeing the scene?” there was a tone not quite right that Helena was quickly picking up on, “Can you describe him?”

“It was dark,” Helena shook her head, “He was wearing a hooded sweater, jeans… that’s all I was able to see.”

“And yet you knew looking down from your window that it was your friend laying in the dark.” He scoffed, “Miss Wells, what is your status in this country?”

“I’m came on a student visa, I’ve since become a full citizen,” she eyed him closely, “What does this have to do with the person who shot Myka?”

“Here is what I see, Miss Wells,” he looked levelly at her, “I have one witness to this crime, one witness who is currently covered in my victim’s blood, who admits to being with her just before she was shot… do you see the problem I’m having here now?”

“Are you insinuating that _I_ shot Myka?!” she shot up from her chair.

“Are you confessing?”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Steve appeared between the officer and HG, blocking her from his sight, “Excuse me sir, you can’t be seriously saying that she shot her friend!”

“And just who are you?” The cop straightened.

“I’m one of Myka’s roommates, _friends_ ,” He crossed his arms, “And I can tell you that HG didn’t do this, that is just insane and shoty police work, if you ask me. And even if you _do_ think she is a suspect, I believe she is allowed the right to counsel before talking to you. You’ve got what you need, or at least what we know, and we’re done talking to you.”

“Don’t leave town, Miss Wells, I’ll be back to talk to you.” He grumbled before walking away.

Steve shrugged off his coat and put it around Helena, her camisole was stained in crimson and clung to her tightly.

“How are you?” he looked her in the eye.

How was she supposed to answer that? She didn’t know, so she didn’t bother. Steve turned back to Claudia and pulled her over, “Take her to the bath room to get cleaned up. I’m gonna call Pete, have him pick her up some clean clothes, then I’m gonna find a doctor to talk to.”

After the adrenaline from her anger at the police officer had left her, Helena was dead on her feet. So Claudia was the one to carefully wipe blood from HG’s face, neck and arms. It took a little bit of scrubbing, but the work was soothing for Claudia. It was something to _do_ besides waiting around for word from the doctor.

When Pete arrived two hours later, Claudia pulled her up from her catatonic stare and took her to the rest room once more. And once again, she had to do all the work, undressing and redressing her friend carefully.

They listened when Pete finally asked HG what happened. She didn’t know much, and she left out the intimacy they had been in before Myka left, so the story was short. She heard a gunshot, found Myka, pushed the emergency button, tried to stop the bleeding, came to the hospital.

That explained to Pete why he found an abandoned tesla in front of Helena’s dorm when he stopped by to grab her some clothes.

The only thing that really pulled Helena out of her catatonic stupor was when a doctor clad in blue scrubs walked to her. “Miss?”

He waited for Helena to look up at him, “Your friend made it through surgery, though she coded twice. She’s stable, for now at least. She’s still in critical condition, the bullet did a lot of damage to her lungs… We should call her family.”

“ _We_ are her family,” Pete interrupted, “We’re what she has.”

“Look, you need to understand, the only thing keeping her alive right now are the machine’s she is hooked up to. Unless we get compatible lungs, and fast… her chances don’t look good.”

Claudia was crying in to Steve’s shoulder once more.

“Can we see her?” Pete asked, his voice cracking over the words, he was trying to stay strong, trying to keep a brave face… but damn it, he couldn’t lose her too.

“I can let one of you back.” He said after a moment’s thoughts, “It isn’t visiting hours, so it’ll only be for a few minutes.”

Helena and Pete looked to each other for a moment. Whatever Pete saw there had him sitting back in his chair fuller and motioning for her to follow the doctor.

The hallway seemed infinite, but before she knew it, she was standing next to a hospital bed. Myka seemed so pale, so fragile with so many tubes and wires hooked up to her. There was a constant beeping that must’ve been her heart, and another machine that seemed to be breathing for her.

Helena held one of Myka’s hands between hers, it felt like ice. She sat heavily on a chair that was slightly more comfortable than the ones in the waiting room.

She looked at Myka’s face, praying for a miracle, praying just to see her eyes once more. This couldn’t be it, “Please.” She heard herself begging, “Please don’t leave me, Myka. I need you. I need you so much. I love you, I don’t know what I’m going to do… Claudia’s a mess, Steve and Pete are trying to be brave, but I can see them cracking. And what about Christina? Who’s going to read Alice in Wonderland to her if you’re gone? Please, Myka, we need you to live…”

The door opened behind her, and she thought it was the doctor coming to tell her her time was up, but she was wrong. An older gentleman, with a wrinkled face, mischievous eyes and salt and pepper hair put his hand on Helena’s shoulder.

“Oh, Helena,” he clicked his tongue at her, “What have you done?”

Helena jumped to her feet, spun around so she was between Myka and this stranger, “Who are you?” she demanded, “What are you doing in here?”

“You’ve been a very busy girl, Miss Wells,” he continued on in an accent that reminded Helena vaguely of home, “Out collecting artifacts, investigating things people ought not investigate, putting your… friends in danger.” He looked briefly to Myka.

“Who are you?” Helena demanded again.

“My name is James MacPherson, and you, my dear, have been making life incredibly difficult for my agents and myself.”

“Raymond and Sandra,” Helena swallowed, “You work with them?”

“Not quiet,” he chuckled, “We have a job we are doing, collecting what you call curiosities, storing them away, safe from the world. Now, I know that your friend is dying, and I hear there is nothing the doctors can do to save her.”

Fresh tears began to stream down Helena’s face.

“I have a proposition for you, my dear child.” He smiled, “Where I work, he have thousands of little artifacts, curiosities, that do a number of wondrous and terrible things. We have a whole section dedicated _just_ to artifacts created during war, did you know that?” he shook his head.

Helena was looking for a weapon, this man was setting off all of her danger sensors.

“There was a medic in world war two, an American fellow,” he continued, “I just so happen to have his dog tags. Not to be confused with another set of dog tags we have lying around somewhere. These do not grant wishes, but they do preform miracles. Which is what you need, I believe.”

“What do they do?” Helena asked, now curious and desperate.

He pulled them out of his coat pocket using a handkerchief so HG could see them, “They fix damage done by firearms, quite well, they do have a few down sides, I’m afraid, but nothing you should have to worry about.”

“And they’ll fix her?” HG’s heart fluttered.

MacPherson nodded, “They will. I want to make a deal with you, Helena. I will fix your friend, but you have to do something for me as well.”

“Anything.” Helena nodded.

“I want you to gather up those three curiosities you snagged and hand them over to me.” He glared, “You will do this as soon as possible. In addition, as my promise that no harm will _accidently_ befall Myka, I want you to swear loyalty to me. You will go out with your friends, collect your little curiosities again, but you will turn them all over to me. You will be on my beck and call for the foreseeable future.”

Helena didn’t trust him, not in the least bit, but what choice did she have? “You’ve got a deal, now fix her!”

He smirked, and went around her. Helena watched him closely as he placed the dog tags around Myka’s neck, having to undo the clasp to get around the chest tube.

The beeping on Myka’s heart monitor increased and Helena rushed back to her side. After a few moments, Myka’s body began to buck, her hands gripping the tube that lead down her throat, pulling on it and gagging.

MacPherson reached around Helena and removed the tags from Myka’s neck. He was out the door before anyone else saw him.

Myka was still coughing, her lungs functioning on their own, but they felt sore.

“Helena?” she croaked as she opened her eyes slowly.

“Myka?” Helena spoke tentatively, “Oh, Myka!” she sobbed before throwing herself over the woman’s chest, sobbing into her shoulder.

Myka huffed and Helena pulled back, “Oh my God, I’m so sorry, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” Myka waved her off, “What happened? I was shot…?” she shook her head trying to remember what had happened.

“You were,” The tears just didn’t seem to have an end, “You died… I saw you die in the ambulance…”

“I’m fine,” Myka tried to sooth her, “I’m fine… hey Helena? How am I fine?” she probed the white bandage on her chest, expecting to feel pain, but she didn’t. Well, not much, she felt like she had a massive bruise, but not like she had a huge gaping wound.

“A curiosity brought you back,” Helena spoke softly, knowing they weren’t in an exactly _private_ setting for this particular conversation, MacPherson could still be outside the door, “For now that’s all that matters. And that you’re alive.” Her voice cracked and it broke Myka’s heart.

“Come on,” She scooted over, moving various wires and tubes until there was enough room on the bed for Helena to lay with her.

Helena thanked whatever god was listening as she cried in Myka’s arms, simply because Myka was still there for her to cry to. Myka kissed Helena’s head softly, and the Brit looked up until she could reach Myka’s lips with her own. There was a desperation in that kiss, a reassurance that they were both there, alive and whole.

At least for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *this button system is at my college, i don't know if it's like that anywhere else


	16. The Long Game

James MacPherson allowed himself a moment of private celebration as he sent his college a text message. Finally, things were back on track.

He had worked too damn hard for too damn long, given up far too much to get where he was only to have his comfortable little kingdom toppled by a couple of nosey college kids.

Sometimes, he wished he could just kill people and be done with it. That would be counterintuitive though, not to mention messy. No, he had to move the pieces on the board to defeat his opponent. He had a feeling Helena Wells would be his most formidable opponent yet, so he would much rather use her as a bishop then have he an enemy.

Myka Bering had been his original target. She had outsmarted his agents not once, not twice, but three times in the span of five days. It was for her that he set this game up.

Starting with planting the folio and an idea. It was almost too easy to lead that girl, Carla Diaz, down the path he wanted. He knew Ms. Bering would stumble upon it, and then it was only a matter of time until he had something to blackmail her skills with. When she ended up in the hospital, he thought he had her king cornered, but before he could go in for the kill, Helena Wells appeared. He realized Myka was just the queen on another board. He needed Helena.

Gorgeous, incredibly intelligent, trained in martial arts with an already questionable moral compass… she was the true prize. So deliciously corruptible.

And seeing how she reacted to a little bump on the head and a twisted wrist, he knew her weakness: he heart. What MacPherson in watching Myka and Helena interact, it became clear that HG Wells’ heart was located within another. If he captured her queen, the king would be his.

It was simple enough to find an enemy, he didn’t even have to talk to Walter Sykes. He found the squabble in which Sykes was sleeping. It was wallpapered with snapshots of Myka, Helena and three others he didn’t recognize. Only, Myka’s face was crossed out with a red X each time. Carved into the walls, into the tables, into the floor, over and over were the words, “You took what was mine.”

All MacPherson had to do was leave a loaded revolver and a simple letter. Walter Sykes twisted mind took over from there. “Go get what is yours.”

MacPherson thought he was just a stalker. A crazed boy with delusions of another, watching his crush from afar. He assumed Sykes would use the gun to scare Myka, kidnap her. Then James would swoop in and offer his assistance in retrieving her, for a price. He didn’t think Sykes was going to shoot her point blank in the chest. He didn’t expect her to die. No, he needed Myka alive, otherwise Helena would be useless.

It was sheer luck that he thought to bring the World War Two dog tags among the artifacts he figured might help. Without them, the game would have been for naught.

Now, all he had was the mess of Walter Sykes to clean up. When Helena learned to the shooter was, there would surely be a hunt for his head. It wasn’t time for that yet. He would be the carrot MacPherson teased her with.

* * *

Helena and Myka only had a few moments of peace before they were interrupted by a very confused looking doctor.

Dr. Tyler Chance had no doubt in his mind before he entered that room that his patient would be dead before the end of shift the following day.

He had seen more than a few nasty bullet wounds in his time. It was no small miracle that the gunman had missed his patient’s heart. Even bigger miracle that she had survived the night. The damage the 38 caused as it ricochet around her chest cavity was more than he could repair. Without a set of compatible lungs lying around, all Dr. Chance could do was buy a little time for the friends and family to say goodbye.

There wasn’t any hope for Myka Bering, that’s why he let the crying woman stay in the patient room for longer than he probably should have. But now, he was done with his shift, and he wanted to go home.

He knocked lightly on the door as he walked in, but neither woman heard him, both having fallen asleep. Helena from sheer exhaustion after having cried herself out. Myka because her body was still trying to repair itself. The dog tags had done an amazing job, but there was still some residual damage.

“Excuse me!” The doctor nearly dropped the clipboard when he found the visitor he allowed in there sharing the bed with his comatose patient.

Helena and Myka shot straight up, both nearly falling off the small bed in an attempt to right themselves. Helena rubbed the sleep from her eyes with the heel of her hands while Myka tried to untangle the wires and tubes from her arms.

“What are you doing?” He demanded as he walked to the bed, stopping when he realized his patient was sitting up, without the breathing tube down her throat.

Helena rolled off the bed as gracefully as she could, trying to turn on the charm so as not to get Myka in trouble for her own neediness, “Doctor, I assure you this was not what it looked like.”

Myka narrowed her eyes at Helena, trying to figure out what she meant by that, but the doctor spoke before she could demand HG explain herself.

“Then perhaps you could explain to me why my terminal patient is sitting up in bed without her machines on?” he slowly stepped forward, pulling at Myka’s gown and bandages. “But that’s- that’s impossible! How did you-? You shouldn’t be-,” he shook his head.

“Dr. Chance?” A woman called from the door way, the three in the room looked up to find an older blonde woman in a doctor’s coat walking in, “My name is Dr. Calder, I’m Ms. Bering’s physician, may I speak with you privately?”

He looked confusedly from the attractive doctor to his patient and back, “Yeah, sure, yeah,” he shook his head before stepping out of the room with Dr. Calder.

Alone once more, Helena looked to Myka, who had her arms crossed over her chest, eyebrow quirked. “Not what it looks like?”

“What?” Helena tilted her head in confusion, “I didn’t want to get you in trouble.”

“Mhmm,” Myka hummed with a roll if her eyes. She rolled her shoulders uncomfortably. Her chest was starting to ache slightly, and she looked down her gown at the now uncovered wound. Or what used to be a wound. Now there was a bumpy round scar the size of a nickel and a multicolored bruise the size of a softball around it. She frowned at it, its placement was going to make it difficult to wear low cut shirts and still hide it.

Helena looked troubled, “How are you feeling?”

“Like I’ve been hit over the head with a baseball bat,” she grumbled, “I didn’t right? I was just shot?”

HG flinched at the word shot, “You lost quite a bit of blood, so I think that’s normal,” she was fidgeting with her thumbs now, looking closely at Myka, wondering what the side effects of the curiosity James used were.

Dr. Calder walked back in the room alone. “You are one lucky girl,” she shook her head at Myka.

“You’re telling me.” She rolled her eyes, “If my doctor’s reaction to seeing me is any indication, I should be dead, right?”

The doctor nodded, “You’ve been brought back but what people in my line of work call an artifact.”

“Your line of work being…?” Myka lead, knowing the older woman didn’t mean health care.

But Dr. Calder just smiled, “The thing is, artifacts have side effects. Some- well, most, not being so good. So while you seem to be in good shape, we’ll want to keep an eye on your condition.”

“So, what, I have to stay here?” they could hear the panic in Myka’s voice, she hated hospitals. It’s why she always refused to go, even though being a klutz meant she had broken her fair share of bones.

“No,” she walked to Myka and examined her chest, Helena looked away, partly to be polite, but mostly because if she saw the damage, even healed, she would start crying again, “I don’t see why you can’t go home, I just want you to call me if something happens.”

“Like what?” she asked.

“Anything not normal,” Dr. Calder looked at her seriously. She didn’t know what artifact had done this, all she knew was James had sent her a text message to sweep this artifacts medical miracle under the rug.

She could sense her patient’s reluctance, so she turned to the other woman in the room, pulling a card out of her pocket, “Here, I’m trusting you to keep an eye on her. If something has you worried, you call me.”

Helena looked at the card, _Vanessa Calder, MD (605) 555 – 0179,_ committing it to memory incase Myka took it from her, “I will, Dr. Calder.”

Vanessa nodded, “Someone will be coming in any moment now with your release forms and personal effects, or at least what the police didn’t take. And don’t worry about detectives, our agents will take care of them.”

“Wait, what about the man who did this?” Helena demanded, “Will he not receive justice for this? Will he get off scott-free?”

“No,” Vanessa assured her, “Our people will find him, don’t worry.”

Helena hid her scowl as she shook the doctor’s hand. She had zero faith in MacPherson’s agents to find their own noses, let alone the man who nearly killed the woman she loved. As soon as they were alone once more, Myka could no longer hold her tongue.

“Where did you get the curiosity that fixed me?” She had been wondering since she woke up, hoping Helena would just volunteer the information, but that hadn’t exactly happened.

Helena suddenly became very interested in her flats as her eyes fell to them directly, unable to look at Myka as she spoke. She knew she had been foolish in what she did, the deal she made, and she wasn’t sure how Myka would react to it, “Do you remember those agents that were after us?” She asked.

“What about them?” Myka straightened, afraid of what would happen if it was Raymond and Sandra who saved her, that would mean they found her, knew where she was and how to find her.

“Their boss came in while you were still… asleep,” they both knew she meant when she was literally on her death bed, but Helena was having trouble coping with everything that happened in the last few hours, and denial seemed to be the best way, “He helped you.”

“What did he want in return?” Myka demanded, because if she didn’t trust the two agents, she was damn sure not going to trust the man they answered to, panic began to set in.

Helena saw the shift in Myka’s eyes as the heart monitor she was still attached to indicated a jump in her pulse, “He just wanted me to give him the cutlass, the ladle and the pipe. That’s all.” It was childish, and it didn’t really take away the fact that she was lying once more, but Helena crossed her fingers behind her back.

“That’s it?” Myka searched Helena’s eyes, something feeling… off. But she wasn’t quite sure what, Helena was being difficult to read.

“That’s it.” Helena nodded. She would handle the MacPherson problem on her own. She convinced herself that she could handle it without getting Myka all worked up for nothing.

A young hospital intern came in with a giant plastic bag filled with the things Myka had been wearing, and a clipboard with paper work on it.

“I’m sorry,” Helena smiled after relieving him of the items he carried, “But could I trouble you for one more thing?”

“For you?” he smiled, “Anything.”

“Right,” She returned his smile, “Our friends are in the waiting room, they brought some clothing for me to change into, and I believe she would rather wear those than these blood stained clothes.”

“Oh, sure thing,” he nodded, “I’ll be back in a jiffy with those clothes for you.”

When he was gone, Myka cleared her throat and Helena turned around to face her, setting the bag at the foot of the bed while looking over the release forms. Apparently, they had also given Myka a script for pain killers. It was like they gave them out like candy, she still had the full prescription from her visit to the hospital in Fresno.

“What?” she asked, half distracted reading through the release of liability form.

“You know what,” Myka rolled her eyes, “That guy was totally flirting with you.”

Helena looked up at her, shocked, “Was he? I didn’t notice.”

“Sure you didn’t.” Myka smirked and shook her head.

“My, my, are we jealous?” Helena smiled.

“What?” Myka blushed, “No, of course not.”

“Mhmm,” Helena shook her head, “You’re quite cute when you’re jealous, you know.” The comment only made Myka blush harder.

When the intern returned with the over-night bag with Helena’s clothes, he told them how adamant Myka’s friends had been to come back, but he couldn’t allow them to since it wasn’t visiting hours yet, and she would be leaving soon anyway.

He spoke only to Helena as he unhooked Myka from the various machines and the IV bag, and now Helena noticed what Myka had before. The tilt of his voice, the dilation of his pupils, increased respiration, heavy words and lingering eyes- he _was_ flirting with her.

He was attractive enough, HG guessed, in his late twenties, tall, thick blonde hair, an air of confidence about him. But he wasn’t exactly her type, and she was only polite in response.

When Myka was finally free of the bed, she rose on shaky legs, taking the clothes to the small bathroom to change. Despite the door being shut between them, she could still hear the intern and Helena conversing. She was asking about something on the paper work, but he seemed uninterested in it, interrupting her halfway through her question of confidentiality.

“So, um,” he smiled crookedly at her, his cheeks dimpling in a way that must’ve killed most women he spoke to, “I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime?”

“Ah,” Helena smiled politely as she shot a look at the still shut bathroom door, “Listen, Michael, was it?”

“Yeah,” he grinned, clearly thinking he would get what he wanted, “But you can call me Mike.”

“Mike,” Helena nodded, “I am ever so sorry. I’m gay.”

“Oh,” he pulled back, his face flushing a little as he gave Helena a once over again, “What a waste.” He meant it was a complement.

Helena smirked, “I doubt my girlfriend would agree.” She worried it might have been a bit presumptuous of her to claim that title over Myka, but hadn’t she said she wanted to do the whole dating thing with her?

He looked over his shoulder at the closed bathroom door, realization dawning in his features, “ _Oh,_ Okay. I’m sorry.”

“It’s quite all right, I assure you.” Helena nodded.

When Michael left the room to save the last of his dignity, Myka finally emerged from the bathroom, a huge smile on her face.

“Your girlfriend, huh?” She asked, eyes alighting with joy.

Helena smiled shyly, “I hope that was alright of me to say. What I mean is, I would like to be able to have the honor of calling you my girlfriend.”

Myka wasn’t sure if she had ever seen Helena blush so much, it looked beautiful on her.

“On one condition,” Myka stipulated as she slowly walked to Helena, her hands held behind her back. For the first time ever, Helena understood why guys liked seeing girls wear their clothes. Myka had on her own jeans, the only thing if hers not covered in blood, but the shirt she had on was one of Helena’s button ups, the sleeves rolled up to her elbows since they were a little short, but it made a site for Helena, and she swallowed thickly.

“Oh?” her voice came out higher than normal, “And what is your condition?” Knowing she just might agree to anything she asked.

“I get to kiss you whenever I want,” Myka smiled, “I mean, I’ve been holding myself back since the moment I met you, I don’t really want to anymore.”

Now they were standing toe to toe, and Helena had to look up slightly to retain eye contact, “I think those terms are quite agreeable.” She stammered, suddenly short of breath.

“Good,” Myka smiled before cupping Helena’s face gently and kissing her.

Helena stood on her tiptoes, winding her fingers into Myka’s hair as she relaxed into the kiss. And, not for the first time that morning, she was insanely glad Myka was still there, alive and whole, because she could get used to kisses like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vanessa was there because she was visiting Artie on Mrs. Fredric’s behest, trying to get him out of retirement. I may or may not write that in in a later chapter, but I didn’t want you to think she just materialized out of nowhere. And yes, I quoted Hustle in this chapter. I love that line though I changed it a little.


	17. Calm After the Storm

Helena insisted Myka submit to the humiliating requirement of leaving in the wheelchair a nurse brought for her after the paperwork was all signed.

“You’ve just been shot, Myka.” She insisted as she stood, blocking the door with the infernal contraption.

“And now I’m fine.” Myka gestured to her upright body.

Helena quirked an eyebrow and smiled suggestively as she let her eyes wander over Myka, “Yes, indeed you are.”

Myka blushed and crossed her arms over her chest, lower lip protruding adorably, “Please don’t make me roll around like an invalid.”

Helena was very nearly swayed by the act, and if it hadn’t been for Myka’s pale pallor, she would have pushed the chair aside and simply assisted Myka’s strides herself. As it was, HG stood her ground and shook her head no.

“The sooner you stop pouting and sit down, the faster we can leave this wretched place and then you can walk on your own.” She gestured for Myka to sit.

Myka resisted still, glaring slightly at the word pout, though she knew that’s what she was doing. So Helena thought for a moment before pushing the chair against the wall beside her and turning to her stubborn girlfriend.

Her gaze was intense and her smile deceptively innocent; Myka gulped, “So, you are certain you are sure on your feet?” She took a step forward, hands clasped behind her back.

“Yes.” Myka nodded firmly.

“You don’t feel dizzy,” she took another slow step forward, halving the distance as her hands moved so they were interlaced in front of her, “Or short of breath?”

“No?” Myka sounded less sure of herself as her pulse jumped.

“Then there’s nothing making you feel,” Helena was directly in front of Myka now their breaths mingling between them, close enough for her to reach out and touch, which she did, tracing her fingers lightly down Myka’s arms until her hands came to rest on her hips, “Weak at the knees?”

“I… I…” Myka couldn’t think to answer the question, couldn’t even remember what it was they were talking about. All she could focus on were Helena’s lips, distractingly close, achingly far.

“That’s what I thought,” Helena chuckled lowly, and Myka’s legs nearly gave out at the sound, she was clinging now to her ability to remain upright.

When their lips finally met, the whole world disappeared for Myka. All that existed in that moment was Helena. She didn’t even realize they were moving, far too busy enjoying the way Helena’s tongue was tracing her lips and mouth. And when HG captured Myka’s lip between her teeth and slowly pulled before soothing the pleasant sting with a caress of her tongue, Myka’s knees finally gave out. Helena let her fall softly into the wheelchair she had backed her up into.

“Now, was that so difficult?” the Brit asked with a wicked smile.

Myka blinked, breathing heavily, coming slowly back to reality and realizing she was sitting in the wheelchair. By the time she was able to turn and glare at Helena, she had already pushed the chair half way down the hall.

“You cheated,” she accused.

“Where’s the fun in playing fair, darling?” Helena teased.

Myka mumbled to herself, but resigned herself to being pushed through the set of double doors at the end of the hall. She was still flushed from Helena’s tactics, her lips still tingling as her fingers traced over the invisible imprint Helena had left there.

If all of their arguments could be solved with kisses, Myka was seriously looking forward to the rest of this relationship.

“Myka!” Claudia’s cry of joy brought her back to the present as the redhead rushed forward to hug her, bending at the waist to do so.

Myka returned the shaky hug as Claudia shook slightly in the embrace, and she looked up at the boys. It was clear from the red rimmed eyes surrounding her that her friends had lost more than a of tears along with a night of sleep having been there all night. Part of her felt guilty for this, but the rest of her was strangely happy. Happy to have friends who loved and worried about her. Happy to _matter_ to people.

“Mykes,” Pete’s voice was unusually gruff, his cheeks pinpricked with red blotches and still slightly moist from the tears he’d tried to hide as he knelt in front of Myka after Claudia released her. He put his hands on her lap, on her arms, touched her cheek, as if making sure she was really there, and whole, “I can’t believe… the doctor said… he was so sure that you weren’t… _how_ are you okay right now? _Are_ you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Myka reassured him.

“I think this is a conversation for the car,” Helena interjected when more questions followed, “Shall we?”

Pete pulled his car around while, after another tearful hug, Claudia and Steve agreed they would met up at the apartment.

Myka and Helena sat together in the back seat while Pete drove, more carefully that Myka was accustomed to. Or perhaps she just didn’t notice, too preoccupied with the feeling of Helena’s fingers intertwined with hers. It was still pretty early in the morning, about five am, so the streets were mostly empty. It gave Myka the feeling that they were in their own little world.

Pete was hesitant to break the pure look if peace on his best friend’s face, but he was getting a wicked bad vibe about something, and he was worried for his friend. He thought seeing her alive would help alleviate the gnawing feeling of wrongness, but it only seemed to increase when she and HG had emerged into the waiting room Pete, Steve and Claudia had been camped out in.

“What happened to you, Mykes?” Pete finally asked.

Helena felt Myka flinch, and she rubbed her thumb across the back of Myka’s hand in a soothing gesture. Myka sighed before slowly lifting her head from the seat rest so she could look him in the eye using the rearview mirror.

“I was leaving Helena’s dorm,” her voice wavered slightly, “About halfway to the parking lot, I was shoved from behind, and I fell. I wanted something, and when I wouldn’t give it to him, he took it.”

“What?” Pete demanded, “What did he take, who was he? Did you recognize him?”

Helena had held Myka’s bag of personal effects that she had when she was brought to the hospital, she had seen what there was. Jeans, vest top, t-shirt, underwear, socks, tennis shoes, wallet, class ring and her car keys. HG couldn’t figure out what it was he could have taken, it wasn’t as if he’d had a whole lot of time. Helena had heard the gunshot, froze for five seconds, then went to the window and saw him already walking away.

Myka looked out the window, her grip unconsciously tightening on Helena’s hand, “It doesn’t matter. It’s being taken care of,” her voice was devoid of emotion, “We don’t have to worry about it.”

Her free hand pulled at the front of her borrowed shirt, as if she expected to find something there she could fiddle with. This didn’t go unnoticed by HG, she recognized that particular action all too well as she was doing the very same thing now- worrying the locket that held a picture of her daughter. The puzzle solving wheels in her brain slowly began to turn.

There was no necklace in her personal effects. She hadn’t ever _seen_ Myka wear a necklace before, so the chain would have had to been long enough that it was kept hidden by the neckline of her shirts, which had been daring as of late. She could only come up with one possibility. As the final pieces fell into place, her blood began to boil. But who would shoot a girl only to steal what appeared to be a simple, albeit old, key on a necklace?

The answer was simple, it had to be someone who knew its true power, power Helena had felt before she neutralized its effects with her very first batch of purple goo. That’s when she realized that MacPherson only mentioned the three curiosities they had collected on the road. He had said nothing of Franklin’s key. Either he was unaware of their first case, or he didn’t mention the key because he already had it.

“Who’s taking care of it?” Pete asked, “The police? Last I heard was they were trying to pin this on HG.”

“What?” Myka’s head whipped back around, “What do you mean they’re trying to pin it on _her_?” anger blossomed in her previously deadened eyes.

“Oh,” the memory of the events that had occurred between Myka’s eyes shutting on the pavement and when they finally reopened in the hospital were a bit fuzzy, “Yes, right, there was a particularly rude officer who had insinuated as much.”

“Who?” Myka demanded, “What’s his name? His badge number? I’ll tell this guy what’s what… questioning you… _you’re_ the only reason I even made it out alive!”

“I’m all for that, really,” Pete interrupted her outburst, “But could you, I don’t know… hey, hey, hey maybe tell _me_ what’s what first? I mean Jesus, Mykes, you leave Fresno in a rush. Then I get this weird voicemail from you all loopy on pain pills, and then I don’t hear from you the rest of the day. Then Steve calls me, says you’re in the hospital and you’ve been shot… the doctor all but told us you were good as dead Myka. So please, give me some goddamn answers!” he pleaded, his eyes softening the harsh words and elevated tone, “How are you alive? And just who is going after your shooter?”\

Myka knew she had to tell him, why was it so uncomfortable to talk about? More importantly, why wasn’t anyone willing to drop this and move on like she was? “The agents, Pete, who we avoided in Santa Barbara and in Fresno? They helped me using a curiosity, and it’s them who are going after the guy.”

“The creepy mysterious federal agents who have a wanted poster of you?” he sounded incredulous, “ _They_ are the ones supposedly helping us now? You trust them?”

“No,” Myka admitted, “But there’s not much else I can do. Can we just drop this now, please?”

Pete seemed like he wasn’t going to let it go until HG shot him one of her famous deadly looks and he piped down.

Myka was worried she would receive another round of questioning from Claudia and Steve, but exhaustion had evidently gotten the better of them, and they were passed out on the living room sofas. Pete went immediately to the refrigerator, and Myka vaguely wondered when the last time he ate.

Myka still had a firm grip on Helena’s hand, taking her straight to her bed room. Once there, Myka flopped down on to her bed. She wasn’t tired, it just was overwhelming suddenly, everything that had happened. It wasn’t as if she’d had a whole lot of time to process it… and she didn’t want to. So as soon as her thoughts started leading her down that path, she struggled to sit up.

Helena confusedly sat at the edge of the bed and watched the struggle on her girlfriends face as it seemed to find it difficult to settle on any one emotion. It finally ended up empty.

“I need to take a shower,” Myka was suddenly crawling under her skin, and she looked around her room for clothes she could put on afterwards, “Will you wait here? I’ll be quick, I promise, I just want to get the smell of that place off of me.”

Helena smiled and nodded, making a show of getting comfortable on Myka’s bed until the girl disappeared into her bathroom. That’s when Helena began to worry, her thoughts of retribution temporarily shelved, something was more important happening now. Something was wrong with Myka, and she wasn’t sure if Myka shutting them out was such a good idea.

Myka slowly took Helena’s shirt off, not wanting to part with it so fast, setting it to the side away from the rest of her dirty clothes. Only now, even as the hot water was running out behind her, she was distracted by the mar on her chest. The ugly scar that puckered out on her sternum. She let her hand trace it carefully, flinching when it brought a phantom pain. She felt disgusted by it turning with a huff and getting into the shower. Scrubbing harder than necessary, trying to get that feeling that seemed to be just below the surface.

Her skin was bright pink when she finally dried herself off and got dressed. Well, half dressed. She stomped out of the bathroom without her shirt on without a word, throwing the shirt she had grabbed into the far corner. Helena quirked an eyebrow but held her tongue as she watched Myka tear through her closet.

“Why did she have to get rid of all my old clothes?” she growled as the sound of hangers smacking against each other filled the room, “All I want is one stupid shirt that will cover this.” She finally turned to HG, pointing to the scar on her chest.

HG tried not to gasp, it was the first time she had seen the scar directly, it distracted her from the fact that her girlfriend was standing divested before her wearing only her bra and jeans. She moved forward, reaching out a tentative hand to brush the scar, but before she could make contact, Myka pulled back and turned away. She didn’t even want Helena to see the scar, it was grotesque to her.

HG sighed and moved to Myka’s closet, searching until she found one of Myka’s old, plain t-shirts that had somehow survived Tracy’s make over. Myka stayed turned away from Helena as she pulled it over her head. And while HG actually liked the view Myka’s new wardrobe afforded her, she had to admit she liked Myka in her old outfits. It reminded her of a happier Myka, when smiles came easier and there was nothing to worry about for them.

So, when Myka finally faced her, HG grabbed her into a tight hug, causing Myka to huff. She returned the hug, though, relaxing some from the warmth it brought her.

“Okay,” Helena pulled back before she had a chance to start crying again, “What shall we do today, you should really rest.”

Myka shook her head, “No, we can’t. It’s Monday, you have Christina today, not to mention class at nine, and I have Ethics at one.”

“Myka, you can’t seriously be thinking of going to class after what you’ve just been through. You need to rest, my love.” Helena plead.

“Please, Helena,” Myka continued, though her stomach gave a pleasant flip at hearing Helena call her ‘ _my love_ ’, “This is what I need, I need for life to be normal. I need to go on like last night didn’t even happen, please. For now I don’t want to think about curiosities or gunshot wounds or fucking Walter Sykes, okay? I just… I want to live today like I went home after kissing you last night and stayed awake all night playing it over and over, looking forward to seeing you today. Can we do that instead? Please?”

Helena swallowed thickly but nodded, “Of course, whatever you need,” She kissed Myka lightly on the lips, holding her face between her hands.

Helena stored away the fact that Myka said it was Walter Sykes she didn’t want to think about. Not some nameless, faceless man. It was Walter Sykes, the boy they had taken the key from in the first place. It was all coming back around to bite them now.

Well, the universe or karma or god or gods or goddesses- whoever the _bloody hell_ was in charge of dealing out justice in this damned universe had another thing coming if they thought Helena wasn’t going to hit back- _harder­._


	18. Calm Before the Storm

Helena wasn’t paying attention in class. She wouldn’t have even bothered coming at all if Myka hadn’t insisted on it.

So the teacher had to call her name twice, and the girl sitting beside her had to nudge her before she realized that she was expected to answer a question.

“I’m sorry, Professor?” She asked as she lifted her head, looking away from her work.

Professor Nielson leaned forward on his desk, glaring over the tops of his glasses at her. “I asked you, Miss Wells, what the main discovery was that started the Superstring Theory.”

If he wasn’t in a better mood than usual, Arthur would have snapped at her, perhaps added one or two cheap shots at her ego, but he _was_ having a good weekend, and Helena Wells was one of his favorite students. Her inattentiveness as well as Miss Donovan’s empty seat next to her had not gone unnoticed.

“The, er,” She screwed her eyes shut to focus better, “The Green-Shwarz Anomaly Cancellation Mechanism.”

“Very good, Miss Wells.” Arthur congratulated gruffly.

A few students looked around at each other. This was a stranger class than usual today. Professor Nielson, while not exactly _cheery_ , wasn’t as grumpy as usual. And the class genius, or at least one of them, who always had an answer when no one else did, needed her question repeated to her. And Nielson had _still_ congratulated her. It was an odd day indeed.

Helena allowed her mind to wander once more now that Nielson’s attention was elsewhere. Her hand continued its idle writing, a mix of plans for a new invention and plans for a new demise, as she thought back over the morning.

It _was_ her day with Christina, and the routine of Helena dropping her off at the Red Couch with Myka while she went to class was what they had grown accustomed to. So when Myka and Helena showed up on Nate’s doorstep at seven thirty, it felt different.

Of course Myka had been in Nate’s apartment before, Helena knew she often brought groceries over for Christina, since Nate tended to eat most of what Helena bought. But she had secretly been trying to keep Myka away from Nate as much as possible. She didn’t like the way his gaze tended to linger on her.

“You don’t have to do this today,” Helena reminded her as she searched for the spare key kept above the door frame, “I can skip this class and have her for the whole day.”

Myka put her hands on Helena’s waist, gently moving her back from the door way so she could reach the key herself, not having to stand on her tiptoes as Helena had to. It was distracting to watch Helena stretch, revealing the small of her back in her low cut jeans and rising shirt, and if Myka stared any longer she was just going to turn around and take Helena back to her bed.

I know I don’t _have_ to,” Myka smiled as she handed the key to her girlfriend, “I _want_ to. I haven’t seen her since Friday morning, and I kind of miss the kid.” She shrugged, but HG knew how much Christina and Myka had grown in each other.

There was clearly no arguing with Myka today, so Helena conceded as they entered the apartment that the layout of mirrored Myka’s.

Christina was sitting on a stool at the counter with a bowl of Luck Charms and her beloved stuffed giraffes. Her face lit up when she saw her mom, and she jumped down from her seat, rushing into Helena’s arms, “Mummy!”

“Hello, my darling,” HG chuckled as she kissed her daughter’s cheek/

“Hi, Myka,” the little girl smiled over her mother’s shoulder.”

“Hey, kiddo,” Myka ruffled her hair playfully, “I’m feelin’ the park today. How about you?”

“Yes!” she scrambled down to her feet, “I’ll go get ready!”

Helena and Myka moved through the apartment, absently picking up a bit of the mess that had accumulated over the weekend- pizza boxes, beer cans, dishes… Nate was terrible about keeping his place clean.

Helena was standing in the kitchen, Myka the living room when it happened. Myka had gathered up a few of the child’s pages of coloring, smiling at how talented the four year old was, when two hands were suddenly on her shoulders.

Even if Myka hadn’t just seen her in the kitchen, the hands on her shoulders were far too large to belong to Helena. Adrenaline flooded her body, her breath becoming shallow. She reacted without thinking, all she had learned with Pete over the summer in her self-defense class rushing back to her.

The man was pinned beneath her in a matter of seconds, his hand pulled up at a painful angle while Myka kept her knee on his back. She was panting heavily, the sound of blood rushing in her ears as she struggled to stay in the present. Why couldn’t she have reacted life this last night?

Helena spun around at the sound of the heavy thud that echoed in the living room behind her, fearing Myka had fainted. She _knew_ she should have made her stay in bed. But what she found was Myka kneeling on Nate’s back, she looked angry and panicked while Nate was laughing intermittently between grunts of pain.

“Okay, okay, _ow_ ,” he chuckled, “I get it, _no touching_ , ow, Myka, come on. I’m sorry.”

Helena approached her slowly, speaking calmly, slowly, “Myka? Darling?” she got close, but made no attempt to touch her, “It’s alright, you’re alright. It’s just Nate.”

It took a moment, but Myka finally came back down.

She blinked, looking up at Helena’s concerned face. Confusion and embarrassment replaced the expressions on Myka and she quickly got off Nate, who was still chuckling to himself, though now he rubbed his shoulder absently.

“Gees, Myka,” He shook his head as he headed towards the kitchen, “Remind me not to meet you in a dark alley. Maybe you should switch to decaf.”

Myka smiled, though her eyes flashed with pain and fear for a split second, and Helena wished she could slap Nate, “Maybe you’re right.”

Christina reappeared before HG could ask it she was alright, and with the presence of the little girl, Myka seemed to return to normal as she and Christina began to make plans for their morning.

Only now, as HG tuned out the lecture she already knew by heart from her private studies, she was able to think through her concern about Myka’s mental health.

She seemed to ready to forget that she had been attacked, she had been _shot_. Surely she wasn’t as over it as she was pretending to be. For God’s sake, she was on an operating table, flat lining twelve hours ago!

All because of Walter Sykes, that damn lunatic. Helena focused on the plan forming on her notebook pages.

Her paranoia caused her to write in French, not wanting a casual look from her neighbor or anyone else to reveal the darkness forming in her thoughts.

Her plans could take her down any number of paths, nearly all of them ending with Sykes dead. Helena knew she had an anger issue. She still felt guilt for the time she snapped in front of poor Wolly, and it was he who had talked her out of her revenge plans for the girl in her class who had made one too many snide comments and aggressive gestures towards Wolly and herself.

It had been kept mostly in check since, by the company of her friends and the knowledge that she could outsmart anyone she came across. The problem now was Sykes had made the same mistake as Victoria had in year eleven had. He targeted someone Helena loved. He made Helena feel fear, and HG Wells did not handle fear well.

Her fight or flight reflex was weighted heavily in favor of fight. She feared for the safety of Christina and Myka above all others, and her sleep deprived, overly strategic, rage filled mind gave birth to darkness that shocked even her.

Sykes was a threat. He needed to be taken out. Raymond and Sandra, as far as Helena was concerned, were worse than useless- they very well may be a hindrance on her plans.

Helena was coming to a conclusion she wasn’t too happy with. If she wanted to find Sykes, if she wanted to do it before the wonder duo, if she wanted to get away with it, she needed to get in good with MacPherson.

That meant giving him the curiosities, artifacts, whatever it was he wanted to call them. But more than that, she needed to find him new ones. She had to make him think he had her, make him rely on her more than his agents. Then she could take out both threats to her family.

She had to play the long game.

She made a deal with the devil, she realized, if what she thought about MacPherson was true, then she was playing with fire.

If it meant protecting the people she loved, Helena supposed she could handle a few burns.

* * *

Myka tried to enjoy the park as she always had done in the past with Christina. She was smart, had a sense of adventure, and one hell of an imagination. Hours would pass between them almost as fast as they did between Myka and Helena. Myka had never even gave kids much of a thought before, but now that she spent so much time with _this_ kid, she found herself enjoying herself.

As Myka played curiosity hunters with the girl and her ever present stuffed giraffes, thought, she found herself distracted.

She eyed the other park goers warily, never letting Christina more than a few feet from her. Myka couldn’t remember ever being so paranoid in her life.

After her reaction to Nate that morning, which Myka had brushed off as a result of lack of sleep and the concussion she was still feeling the effects of- including the migraine that flared in and out at the base of her skull- Myka couldn’t get her heart to return to normal speeds. She was relieved when Christina pulled her book out of her small backpack and begged Myka to read it to her.

Myka sat with her back to the tree and Christina in her lap. She finally began to calm as she brought the story to life for the four year old who tried to follow the words on the page with her eyes along with Myka’s voice. So when a shadow fell over them, Myka simply looked up out of curiosity, not misplaced fear, and a smile broke across her face when she was met with the beautifully familiar dark eyes, alight with their own small smile.

“Hey, you,” Myka grinned up at her as Christina stood to greet her mother.

Helena was happy to see Myka relaxed and smiling. Maybe things weren’t as bad as she imagined them to be. Perhaps Myka really was fine and HG had let her mind dwell and over examine. She was over reacting, surely.

They walked across the road to Leena’s, Christina swinging by her arms between them, laughing madly as she would run for a head start only to be swung back. When they reached the dner, there were seated almost instantly despite the lunch rush- a perk of working there, HG supposed, as well as having the owner as your informal psychologist.

Leena was nearly bouncing with joy when she saw the trio enter, at the way Myka and Helena looked at each other over Christina’s head, at the aura of pure love that, while still young and blossoming, was intertwining between them in a beautiful way, over powering the darkness that pulsed in each of them quietly.

Leena tapped Stephanie, the hostess on shift, on her shoulder, “What’s the pool up to?”

“Which one?” the woman chuckled, pulling out her small spiral bound notebook from her apron, it contained all of the employee bets.

“On Myka and Helena,” She clarified with an eye roll, it was the only one Leena was participating in, the only one that really mattered.

“That’s our big one…” she flipped through the pages until she reached the one she wanted, “Most everyone is out now… it’s up to 1200. The only people that are left are those that think it’ll never happen- at least not before next Valentine’s Day, Jason for thanksgiving, Sara for Christmas, and me for New Year’s… oh, and you for… this week.”

Leena smiled and pointed to the couple as they sat in their booth, holding hands under the table as Christina chattered on.

“So?” Stephanie, crossed her arms, “They’ve held hands before…”

Then, while Christina was busy scribbling away on her papers, Helena carefully brushed Myka’s hair back before kissing her lips. It was brief, but the moment was positively charged.

“I’ll be damned,” Stephanie smiled as she pulled the small stack of bills from her apron and handing them over to Leena.

The wait staff on shift all paused briefly in their duties to shoot each other glances of joy and disbelief. Leena left to her office, where she set half of her winnings aside for her dream as she always did, and the other half she saved t give as a bonus to Helena. She felt bad that she had made a bet on her friend’s love life.

When Myka left, after a lingering kiss goodbye, to go to class, Leena sat down next to Christina, across from Helena, giving her a broad smile.

“Is it okay for me to say, ‘I told you so,’?” she asked, tilting her head innocently. Helena blushed and rolled her eyes, but her smile was more genuine than Leena had seen in a long time.

* * *

The further Myka walked from Leena’s, the more on edge she became. Despite the late September sun still hanging high in the sky, it felt like the world was steadily growing darker around Myka.

The shadows were stretching, reaching out to grab her. Fear began to wrap its cold tendrils around Myka’s heart, which began to beat loudly in her chest. It poisoned the air around her that her lungs were desperately trying to pull in.

Her pace quickened. Out of the corner of her eye, she could have sworn a dark figure was darting in the shadows. Flashes of blond hair and pale eyes mocked her with a pointed smile. She was the prey, slowly being stalked, lead into a trap.

A car door slammed shut somewhere and Myka jumped, the sound of her blood and breathing drowned out everything else. She began to run. But her pursuer only seemed to gain on her and she grew desperate. Her lungs aching, muscles burning. She had to reach safety.

When she finally burst through her classroom doors, leaning back on them, trying unsuccessfully to get a breath as her hands trembled, every eye in the class turned on her.

Professor Vanderlaan rose from her desk, “Ms. Bering?” She called to her panicked student, the fear surrounding her nearly tangible, “Are you aliright?”


	19. Hellacious

Myka was not alright, much as she pretended to be in the weeks that followed.

She wasn’t sleeping. She couldn’t even remember the last time she got more than an hour of sleep. It wasn’t that she wasn’t tired. She was beyond exhausted. The problem was that when she closed her eyes, the darkness took on a physical weight that would become too much for her to bare, it was _suffocating._

On the nights when exhaustion would consume her, she was plagued with nightmares. Sometimes she relived that night, over and over, unable to change her course of action, and she was shot over and over. She could feel the pain of the hot metal that exploded from the barrel of the gun tear through her with disturbing clarity. But she actually preferred that dream to the others.

She would become a forced spectator, held down with restraints, watching the deaths of those she held most dear. Every night these dreams became so real to her, that though part of her brain was trying to tell her it was false, those whispers were overshadowed by the screams that they were dying and she couldn’t save them.

On the night that she witnessed Walter Sykes shoot Christina and then Helena- though only after Myka had to listen to her scream for her daughter’s life, Myka woke up screaming and drenched in sweat, crazed and trying to through of the restraints that the blankets had twisted into around her wrists.

Helena had been sleeping soundly beside her, waking suddenly at the start of her outburst. Too suddenly to be coherent. She tried to calm the flailing Myka, though logically she knew you weren’t supposed to touch someone who was having a nightmare until they were fully awake.

Myka struck out in a panic, catching Helena’s jaw with the back of her hand, it woke the other woman up completely, and she pulled back, taking a breath before working on using only her voice to bring Myka back. She spoke low, calming, until Myka’s breathing slowed and sanity returned to her eyes.

Helena stood them up from the bed, leading them from Myka’s room to the kitchen. When Pete stuck his head out of his room, HG mouthed _nightmare_ to him, and he nodded before returning to his own bed.

Helena sat her at the counter before busying herself with making them two cups of tea. She tried to get Myka to tell her what the dream had been about, wanting to make it better, but Myka vehemently refused, so she let it go, settling for trying to help her forget with light touches and gentle kisses.

When the tea was finished and Helena was rinsing their cups, Myka saw the red mark on the side of her face, starting to swell slightly. Myka rose from the bar stool, walking slowly to her; She spun HG by her hips so they faced one another. Helena tilted her face in confusion at the expression she saw on Myka’s face.

“Did I do that?” Myka whispered, horrified as she gently touched the side of Helena’s face with the tips of her fingers.

Helena tried not to flinch under the contact, her face still tender, but Myka saw the tightening in her eyes and immediately pulled back.

“Oh my God, Helena,” Myka gasped quietly, “I am so sorry.” Tears welled in her eyes.

“It’s alright, my love,” HG grabbed both of Myak’s hands in hers, “It was an accident, I should have known better…”

“Don’t,” Myka shook her head back and forth, “Don’t make excuses for me, I _hurt_ you, Helena!”

“Yes,” HG nodded, “But it was an accident and I will heal, I am far more concerned about you. You’ve been having nightmares, and by the looks of them, they’re getting worse.”

“I’m fine.” My shut down just as she always did when the subject became about her, “I’m just tired.”

“Let’s go back to bed then, shall we?” She offered and Myka nodded in agreement because she could see that Myka’s constant waking up in the middle of the night was taking a toll on her as well.

Myka didn’t fall back asleep that night. And for the next week she felt a pain in her chest whenever she saw the discoloration on Helena’s face. Guilt and shame haunted her waking hours, and fear reigned supreme as night fell. She should be stronger. This wasn’t her. Myka Bering was not afraid of the dark. She shouldn’t be allowing this to affect her so much- for God’s sake, she’d _hit_ her girlfriend!

She was determined to never allow it to happen again, HG shouldn’t have to suffer because of her weakness.

A month passed and she no longer woke Helena with her nightmares on the nights she stayed over, mostly because she didn’t allow herself to sleep those nights. She would wait until Helena’s breathing had evened out, fast asleep on the side of the bed she’d claimed as her own, before rising and retrieving the shoebox that sat on her desk.

It was filled with letters, all addressed to her, that Helena had wrote to her over the course of the three months they’d spent apart. HG had finally given them to Myka, since she’d written them for her and she wanted her to know the things she always meant to tell her. So she handed over the box that was full to bursting with a sheepish smile.

“My words never seem to mean what I want them to,” she told her, “But writing has always come easier than speaking. My heart flowing in the ink while I choke on it saying my feelings aloud.”

Myka disagreed with her on that point, Helena had always had a way with twisting words however she wanted, at least in her opinion, but she had been so excited to read them, the gesture had caused one of the few genuine smiles she was capable of nowadays. She wanted to devour them all, but instead she took her time, reading ever word carefully while the author of the beauty she held in her hands slept soundly beside her.

Some made her laugh like her antics with Wolly or her days with Christina, some made her angry beyond belief at the things that happened in London, some made her cry with such heart wrenching sadness, she’d have to remind herself that she had Helena now, and she could see her smile and laugh.

She read one over and over for a few nights straight, its folds now well creased, but it was written towards the end of summer, and it struck a pang in Myka’s heart.

* * *

_My Dearest Myka,_

_I think Wolly gets tired sometimes with the amount of time I spend moping around missing you. My Christina absolutely adores you already though, and I do so hope that you can meet her someday. In the stories I tell her about our adventures together, you are always saving the day, you’ve become quite the heroine to her._

_I crave you constantly these days. I feel your absence as a physical ache in my chest. I wish now more than ever that I had the sense to ask you to come with me that day I left you in the airport. I want nothing more in this moment then to feel your arms around me, to hear your voice as you tell me that it will all be alright. Just knowing that you exist has helped me get through these last months, thinking of your smile, your laugh… you have such a beautiful laugh. I swear, you could make hell feel like home to me, I think you would have liked it here with me. At least I hope you would have._

_I wish I had explained everything to you when I still had the chance. I wish I could explain to you now all the things I’ve been through and even my feelings for you that I tried to deny because surely someone like you wouldn’t want to be with someone as damaged as I. I thought I was actually doing you a favor that day in the airport, leaving you before I could ruin you. I fear all I have done is rip my own heart in two, because I miss you more than I believed possible._

_I love you. There is no denying that now, but what’s the point when I can’t say it to you? Can’t look in your eyes as I wait on baited breath for you to accept or reject my love? Will your eyes alight with joy or dim in pity?_

_You do have the most amazing eyes, they’ve always reminded me of the most beautiful summers I’ve never had but hoped to experience with you. Though it is said that expectation is the root of all heart ache, is it alright if I still pray to get those summers with you? Because I feel like I need all the time in the world to tell you how deeply I feel for you._

_With more than a million words in the English language, I still find it impossible to tell you how beautiful you are, but I want the time to try and tell you regardless. Even thinking your name, it appears in cursive, because you are everything beautiful in a life that has seen very little of it._

_You’ve changed me so much, Myka Ophelia Bering, by just being yourself. And if there is one thing I could tell you, could make you believe, is that I am always going to love you. Even if we are not together and even if you are really far away from me as you are tonight._

_Sincerely, Solely Yours,_

_Helena G. Wells_

* * *

It was stained with tears, some of them already there when Myka opened it for the first time, some of them belonging to her.

Some nights, these letters were the only things getting her through the anxiety and fear, and she wanted Helena to know that, but she didn’t want her to know how weak she really was. It was hard enough to hide it from her as it was. Makeup caked on the dark circles that seemed to be a permanent fixture under her eyes now, trying to avoid Helena’s dorms without her realizing that’s what she was doing.

It was a problem when she didn’t want to retrieve her car from the student parking by the dorm, but it was easily solved when Claudia volunteered to drive it back to her, and Myka had been relieved. When she realized she needed her car and where she left it, panic filled her at the thought of having to walk the quad once more to reach it.

It didn’t come up again until Myka and Helena’s first date.

It hadn’t occurred to the two women to blatantly announce to their friends that they were no longer just friends. So in the days that followed with Helena hovering over Myka, helping her with the pain in her wrist, head and chest, the three other friends hadn’t read much into it, Helena had always been a tad maternal.

But when Myka had been sitting watching over the top of her forgotten book Helena type away on a computer in her living room, the look she was giving her didn’t go unnoticed. Steve, Pete and Claudia were playing some video game, but they were far more interested in seeing how their two friends were reacting around each other.

Myka gave a longing sigh when Helena stretched and rose to her feet, retreating to the kitchen for a drink and a break from her work.

Steve leaned back on to the couch cushion that Myka was laying on and gave a faux cough to get her attention, “Yeah, Mykes, that was, uh, that was pretty gay.”

Myka laughed and smacked him in the back of the head with her book, “Your funny, Jinks.”

“Seriously, Mykes,” Pete said in a whisper, “She’s hot, smart, and has a sexy accent, if you don’t date her I will.”

“Yes, the accent is the tip in the scale, it’s what _really_ attracted me to Helena,” Myka snorted, “And what about Amanda, huh?”

Pete shrugged, “Amanda thinks she’s hot too, we could share, _hey, hey, hey_.” he waggled his eyebrows.

Myka punched him in the arm, “I don’t think so, Lattimer, this one’s mine.”

“Ow!” Pete rubbed his shoulder, “Territorial much? Why don’t you just make a move?”

“What are we talking about?” Helena asked as she claimed her spot once more by Myka’s feet.

“Myka’s lack of a love life?” Pete offered, missing Myka’s death glare.

“Oh?” Helena quirked an eyebrow, “Is my company in some way lacking to you, Peter?”

“What?” Pete blushed and shook his head, “No I meant like, _dating_.”

“Isn’t that what we’re doing?” Helena stage whispered to a grinning Myka.

“I mean, I haven’t had a chance to take you on a proper date yet, I was planning one for this Friday night, if you’re free?” Myka said tilting her head, “Either way, I think a more proper way to say what we are is ‘going steady’, but it sounds a bit old fashioned.”

“If Claudia is free to babysit Christina for the evening, I would gladly accompany you anywhere,” Helena smiled, “And, if I may, I would like to just refer to you as my girlfriend.”

“I would like nothing more.” Myka grinned hugely at her.

Pete, Steve and Claudia sat staring gape mouthed at them.

“Am I dreaming?” Claudia asked Steve, “Or did my real life otp just become canon?”

“No one knows what those words mean, Claudia.” Steve whispered back.

“Please, my tumblr followers know exactly what I mean, and they ship them as much as I do.” Claudia rolled her eyes before going back to the game that Steve and Pete seemed to forget about.

It took a few moments, in which Myka went blushing back to her book and Helena began her work again, but Pete and Steve looked to each other, exchanged a look, a shrug that said “ _well it’s about damn time_ ” before they too went back to their game.

Myka had been absurdly glad that her friends just accepted it so easily, like it was no big deal. And the date that Myka treated Helena to that Friday had been beyond perfect. Pretty dresses, flowers, candles and delicious food with the best company imaginable. The single blemish on the evening was taking Helena back to her dorm.

Helena’s talking had kept Myka distracted on the drive, the walk through the quad, the journey up to the tenth floor. It wasn’t until Myka kissed Helena good bye at the door that fear began to creep back into her heart.

She had a panic attack at the door of the dorms. She sat on the floor, her head on her knees, trying to convince herself that she had nothing to worry about. When she did finally rise to her feet, she was barely to keep her speed under a flat run while returning to her car. Part of her was reliving every moment of that night as she went, so that she was surprised when she made it to the car in one piece.

She had been avoiding Helena’s dorms since, which hadn’t been that big of a deal, since Helena spent most nights at Myka’s anyway, unless she had a ton of work to catch up on.

And though they shared a bed and many heated moments, they had yet to have sex. They only ever went far enough to sexually frustrate Helena, though she did her best to hide it. She knew Myka needed to feel like she was ready and in control before she gave in, so she made due with frustrating Myka right back at the most in opportune times.

Myka’s only moments that resembled peace were moments like these.

Her hands shook doing simple tasks like tying her shoes or writing. Her words becoming illegible at times. She had shattered two plates and her favorite coffee mug. She was lucky if she could put her make up on at all in the morning, forget about doing it perfectly. When she read, sometimes the words shook so badly between her hands that she had to stop all together.

And the headaches! God, the head aches were crippling and constant. More than once she had thrown up from the pain of it.

Through it all, the panic attacks may have been the worst. They occurred daily, sometimes more than once a day. She wished she knew what triggered them, what made her body so terrified that it nearly shut down and tried to suffocate itself, then she could avoid it. Very little used to scare Myka, heights, things with tentacles, and losing the people she loved. These days, it seemed like everything terrified her.

She was falling behind in her classes. She sat in the back row when she actually bothered to show up. Her teachers, most of whom knew her by now, were becoming worried. They were giving her every opportunity, but the girl seemed so gone sometimes, lost in her own head. The fear and panic that would appear suddenly, they began to talk to each other, reviewing her work, trying to figure out what changed in their A student as her grades slowly declined.

She spaced out at work so often, Abigale stopped asking her to do things, allowing Myka to just wander aimlessly through the stacks whenever the urge to do so hit her. Any other employer perhaps would have fired any other employee, but Abigale sensed something in Myka, and was worried for her mental and physical health as both seemed to be deteriorating and she no longer saw her for sessions.

Her friends had trouble getting and keeping her attention. And every time she jumped at a loud noise, they looked to one another, asking how they dealt with something like this. They couldn’t understand what she was going through since she refused to open up to them. Pete thought Myka had been a social recluse before, but now Myka left the apartment strictly as much as she needed to.

Helena was worried for her girlfriend perhaps more than most. She was there when attacks hit, she saw the slight changes that went unnoticed by many of the others. The weight loss, the sadness that seemed to be all consuming, the nightmares she tried to hide. Helena only became more consumed with trying to find Walter Sykes, just so that she may quell the fears Myka held of him. Make him human from monster once more.

The only one who didn’t seem too worried for Myka was Christina. The little girl was the only one Myka had the energy to keep up pretenses for any more. The only one aside from Helena who could get her out of the apartment on bad days. Christina made her smile with her wild tales and the way she saw the world. Her childlike wonder, her innocence is what Myka clung to the most.

Being with Helena and Christina is the only thing that lets her feel almost normal again. But even their presence could not for long stave off the darkness that stretched out for her.

Helena didn’t want to leave Myka for the weekend, she really didn’t. But she had no choice. She had, thus far, been assisting MacPherson from the relative safety of her laptop, using Claudia’s system to track artifacts in different states and countries. She was dragging her feet, so only reviled the location of five thus far. Now MacPherson was asking her to go to Salem to retrieve an artifact that was apparently making the town’s people think the teenaged girls in the town were witches.

She wanted to say no, but her plan demanded she say yes. So she told Myka that she needed to visit a physics professor at Boston University that weekend for her dissertation thesis. Myka believed her easily, but the pain in her eyes was nearly enough to break Helena’s resolve. But the prize of Sykes’ head was too much to pass up.

So she packed a bag, and Myka drove her to the airport, the entire way promises of being back as soon as possible fell from her tongue on deaf ears. Myka was having a very different flash back now. The same airport, almost six months in the past.

At least this time she got a love saturated kiss goodbye, but it didn’t keep her heart from shattering as she watched the plane carrying her girlfriend leave the tarmac.

Myka was afraid of the thoughts that plagued her from the moment Helena told her goodbye. What was going to keep her tethered to reality with HG gone?

The deciding moment that she needed to get help was her drive back into town. She found herself sitting on the guardrails of the bridge that went over the train tracks. She didn’t remember pulling off to the side of the road, or walking to this point, or stepping over the metal railing, but here she was.

She wasn’t suicidal, she didn’t want to die, she was just struck with this wonder of what it would be like to let go. Frightened, she tripped back over the railing, breathing heavily through tears and ashamed of her weakness in that moment.

She stayed sitting on the asphalt for a while before she came up with the beginnings of a plan. She pulled out her wallet, the plain white card that she had put in there upon receiving it. She took out her phone and taped the numbers in without allowing herself to think much about what she was doing.

“Doctor Calder,” the older woman greeted from the other end of the line.

“It’s Myka Bering,” She could hear the dead tone in her own ears now that everyone had been hearing before,  “The college student who was shot, and they used dog tags to fix?”

“Yes, I remember,” Vanessa stopped what she was doing.

“I think,” Myka shut her eyes tightly, “I _know_ I need help.”


	20. Shell Shock

“What’s happened?” Dr. Calder asked, worry etching in her forehead. She sat down at the desk she was rifling through, glancing up at the clock and wondering how much time she had before James returned to his office and found her there.

“Something is really wrong with me,” Myka’s voice was monotonous, and Vanessa glanced around the office with frantic eyes, looking for _something_. She wasn’t sure what, but she knew there had to be something that she could take to the Regents to convince them something was wrong with MacPherson. This latest issue with Myka Bering was the straw that broke her figurative camel’s back.

James had been acting strangely for a long time. Something had felt _off_ about everything he did. Arthur only wanted to see the best in his old partner, so Vanessa had kept her little project a secret from him. Irene Fredric and Jane Lattimer had recruited Vanessa on their personal mission of figuring out just what James MacPherson was up to.

Vanessa hadn’t wanted to get involved at first. She just wanted to do her job, and that was to help the agents and other people who had been effected by artifacts. She was good at her job, and she knew it was important work first hand.

She had been in Fairview visiting with Arthur, wondering if he was ever going to muster the courage to ask her out on a real date, when James had informed her there was a young woman in the hospital who had been shot, and a set of WWII dog tags had been used to heal her. She was being sent to intervene with the doctors, to handle the questions that would arise from the miracle that had taken place.

She found it odd that the shooting was not artifact related, and she wondered why MacPherson had bothered to travel all the way to Nowhere California to save someone with an artifact they didn’t fully understand.

She expressed her concern to Artie, but he said if James had done such a thing, surely he had a reason. Arthur’s blind faith in his ex-partner was not reassuring.

Mrs. Fredric had come to her again, asking her to explain to her what happened. Anger and something that resembled closely to fear was almost readable on the older woman’s normally stoic face as Vanessa confided in her.

That’s when the Warehouse’s caretaker told her what Jane Lattimer had been trying to get Artie involved in. This group of college kids who had stumbled upon the hidden world of endless wonder. They collected artifacts at a surprising rate with phenomenal results for five kids who had no idea what they were doing. What’s more, the artifacts they had collected had supposedly already been snagged, bagged and tagged by previous agents.

Mrs. Fredric was looking into pulling them into the Warehouse, and to bring Arthur Neilson back into the game. And Vanessa got the sickening feeling that James knew the artifacts they were collecting had somehow been released from the Warehouse, and perhaps had orchestrated the whole attempt on Myka Bering’s life to either send a message for the kids to stop what they were doing, or because he needed something from them.

So Vanessa had been keeping close to MacPherson, trying to learn just what he was doing. She was also spending a lot of time trying to figure out what kind of side effects were going to be hitting Myka after having the dog tags used on her. This was the phone call she had been both expecting and dreading.

“Tell me what you think is wrong with you,” she tried to keep her voice calm as she spoke, not wanting to alert Myka to the immediate danger she might be in.

“Well,” Myka thought for a moment, “I’m not sleeping, I can’t concentrate, I’m afraid of almost everything, and I think I almost killed myself… maybe… I’m not sure why I was standing on the side of the bridge really.”

 _This isn’t good,_ Vanessa sighed, “This is most likely a result of the artifact that was used on you. We could always neutralize the artifact, but it may also reverse the healing of your bullet wound.”

“I’m not sure what to do here, doctor.” Myka admitted, “Because the coma I was in sounds like a better option than going on like this.”

Myka’s apathy was concerning, “Don’t worry, Myka. Until we can find a way to negate these side effects, we can find you a psychologist to work with.”

“I think I already have a therapist I can talk to.” The thought of opening up to someone new didn’t sound like a good idea for Myka, it would just be showing weakness to yet another person in her life.

“Give me your doctor’s name, and we’ll clear her so you can talk to her about everything.” Vanessa assured her.

“Doctor Abigale Cho,” Myka said, “She owns the bookstore I work at… she gives kids free therapy if they want help. I’ve talked to her a few times before…”

“Okay, Myka, just… stay safe until I get a chance to call you back,” Dr. Calder’s voice was almost pleading, “It won’t take long I swear.” She felt so helpless so far away from someone who needed help.

“Okay.” Myka agreed before hanging up the phone.

Myka looked around where she had stopped. She didn’t remember driving there, but it was a pretty place to stop, much like everywhere that was ten miles outside of Fairview. Trees and mountains and open skies… the world and all its problems felt worlds away.

She left her car pulled off to the side of the road and walked off the short bridge towards the wooded area until she reached the other side that dropped down sloping to a small valley of green. She could look over the pastures on the far hills, hear a brook rushing nearby, see the open blue infinity above her. Myka sat on a rock, content with her chosen spot.

She let the sun warm her, ignoring the gnawing feeling that seemed to be only growing inside of her.

* * *

The six hour flight was supposed to be the easy part of Helena’s weekend. She could feel the distance stretching between her and Myka growing as a painful tug in her chest. She didn’t want to be there. She shouldn’t be there. She should be at home with her girlfriend and her daughter. Why did she agree to do this?

 _Because_ , she argued, _you are no closer to finding Walter Sykes than you were when you started. Like it or not, you need MacPherson if you want to get your revenge._

She had taken solace in the fact that she was alone in her row of seats, no one was there to bear witness to her mental debate with herself. That is, until tweedle dee and tweedle dipshit made their appearances.

The shadow fell over her the moment before someone shoved their way past her to sit at the window seat while another took the aisle seat, trapping her in the middle. She opened her eyes to glare, but she was pulled up short when she recognized it was Agents Raymond and Sandra sitting on either side of her.

Sandra looked like she would like nothing more than to put cuffs on Helena and drop her in some super-secret government prison and let her rot. Her hair was pulled back in a tight pony tail, her makeup severe, her pant suit clean and pressed… She was a type a personality, that much Helena could tell. She probably had everything color coordinated and in order and if anything messed up her system, it wouldn’t see the light of day. She was an un-adorable Myka, Helena realized. And her mind quickly filed away that information to later be used in her favor.

On the surface, someone could have mistaken Raymond for being just as by the book as his partner. But Helena’s eyes noted that his shirt wasn’t buttoned all the way, his suit jacket was wrinkled, his face sporting a bit of stubble on the jaw line. It also didn’t help his case that he was smiling suggestively at Helena, a fact also to be later analyzed.

“Listen here, Missy,” Sandra hissed and HG quirked an eyebrow at her, “I don’t like you, and I don’t trust you.”

“The feeling is mutual.” Helena said sweetly.

Sandra’s upper lip twitched in distain, “But James wants you to work with us. So there are going to be some ground rules.”

“Should I take notes?” HG’s voice dripped with sarcasm.

“I don’t know how you were able to retrieve those artifacts so quickly, but for some odd reason, James thinks we need you to get this one back.” She grumbled, and HG sensed something she wasn’t quite sure about yet.

“Oh, come on partner,” Raymond pried his eyes from Helena’s chest to smile at Sandra, “if Agent MacPherson thinks it’s a good idea, I believe we can work with her.”

Sandra seemed none too thrilled by the idea, and Helena couldn’t blame her. She had spent spring break thwarting these two, messing them up on their missions. Then again, they had gone on a man hunt for her girlfriend, so she didn’t feel too badly about it.

They began bickering over her and HG could feel the headache growing. If this plane ride was any indication, she was in for a _long_ weekend. She wished Myka were there. She could hardly believe that she left her in an airport alone _again_. What was the definition of insanity? Repeating the same thing over and over, expecting different results…

HG thought she must’ve been pretty mad to leave Myka like that again, lying to her all over again… How much longer would she have to keep this up?

* * *

“Myka?” the sound of her name softly being called startled her out of her trance.

She glanced over her shoulder, watching her boss carefully approaching, stepping over and around rocks and foliage, “Oh, hey, Doc,” Myka greeted, “How’d you find me?”

“You’re doctor called me again when she couldn’t get a hold of you, you had us worried.” Abigale came to a stop just behind Myka, looking down at her with so much concern, Myka actually felt contrite.

“I’m sorry, I guess I lost track of time… I didn’t hear my phone ring.” She’d actually left her phone on the side of the road where she had sat talking to Dr. Calder on the phone, along with her wallet and keys- it’s a miracle no one stole her car.

“Do you mind if I sit with you?” Abigale asked, gesturing to the large rock Myka had perched herself on.

“Knock yourself out.” Myka shrugged.

Abigale got comfortable beside her, allowing them a few moments of comfortable silence as they gazed at the same scenery Myka had been studying for the last few hours.

“Myka, what are you doing here?” Abigale asked, worried at the expression- or lack thereof- on the young woman’s face.

“I was on the bridge, just standing at the edge of it, wondering what it would be like to jump… There was just ugliness and darkness… I wanted to surround myself with something beautiful while I waited…” Myka trailed off for a moment, “There is so much light out here, it’s quiet and open… it felt good. So I sat here, thinking about everything.”

“Tell me what you’re feeling, Myka,” Dr. Cho plead, “Help me understand what you’re going through.”

“That’s the problem, Doc, sometimes I don’t feel anything,” Myka looked at her, her eyes glazed a bit, “And the rest of the time I feel too much. I feel like I am constantly on alert, and I am just waiting for someone to jump out and attack me, or Christina or HG or my friends. I can’t sleep, I can’t think straight, sometimes I can’t even leave my apartment. And I feel so stupid because of it, I shouldn’t be afraid to leave my house, I shouldn’t be waking up HG because I’m too weak to change what’s happening in my dream.”

“What you’re describing sounds a lot like post-traumatic stress disorder.” Dr. Cho pursed her lips and tilted her head, “Can you tell me what happened, Myka? How long have you been suffering from this?”

“Since the middle of September.” She had a haunted look in her eye, and Abigale knew she needed to keep her in the present, but she also had to know what the root of the problem was.

“What happened, Myka? What do you keep flashing back on?” she asked gently.

“Am I allowed to tell you?” Myka turned to face her.

“Anything you tell me is confidential.” Abigail assured her.

“No, I mean, did Dr. Calder say I was allowed to tell you?” She clarified.

“She told me that the warehouse cleared me, whatever that is supposed to mean.” The doctor shook her head.

“Okay, where to I start?” Myka asked more of herself than Abigale.

“Wherever you feel most comfortable.”

“Then I guess I should start from the beginning then.”  Myka sighed, “It was in March, and everyone was cramming for midterms…”


	21. The Lies We Tell

It was a long first day in Salem, made all the more lengthy by the ache in Helena’s chest that seemed to only grow with time.

Dealing with the two Warehouse agents constantly looking over her shoulder was driving her mad. Not only that, but they would constantly shoot jibes at her, that she could take and send right back, but it was all very exhausting fighting to be somewhere you didn’t want to be in the first place. She wished she could wash her hands of this madness, take the red eye home and be able to sleep in the arms of her girlfriend.

This case was shaping up to be very difficult, and she wished for the millionth time that day that Myka was there with her. She tried to rationalize these feelings at first. If Myka were there, they could solve this case in no time at all. After all, it wasn’t only HG to solve all those cases and retrieve all of those curiosities. It was her and her team. So, logically, she needed Myka there to help her figure it out.

But she knew it was mostly for selfish reasons she wanted her there. She didn’t like being so far apart from Myka. It put an itch beneath her skin she couldn’t reach. She needed Myka to keep herself from doing anything crazy. She just needed to hear her voice.

As Helena collapsed heavily on the bed, she pulled her cellphone closer to her face, just staring for a moment at the picture that was her background, the two most important people in her life smiled back. Helena bit back tears of frustration that they were both so impossibly far from her now.

It was a little after ten in Salem, making it seven in Fairview. Myka had just made it back to her own bedroom, worn to the bone though she really didn’t do anything that day, when her phone rang.

She pulled the pillow Helena used to her chest, inhaling her lingering scent and imagining she was really there as she answered the phone.

“Hello?”

“Love,” Helena sighed, releasing a breath she hadn’t known she was holding. The pain in her heart lessened ever so slightly.

“How’s Boston?” Myka asked, craving to listen to HG talk, make her words erase the day she’d had after she left.

“Cold,” HG rolled her eyes, “Much too cold for my taste, though they tell me it is unseasonably warm for this area.”

Myka smiled, “You’ve become a California girl, haven’t you?”

“We are quite spoiled, I suppose.” Helena allowed with a chuckle.

“I miss you,” there was a pain in Myka’s voice that Helena felt physically, “When are you coming home?”

“Soon,” Helena swore, “As soon as I can, my love.”

There was a moment of silence where the only audible sound was their breathing. While both kept their eyes shut, they could almost pretend that they were laying side by side in bed, sharing quietly the events of their day.

Myka knew she should tell her girlfriend what happened after she left the airport, she deserved to know more than anyone else, and she had already told two separate people. A strange fear kept her quiet though. Myka was seeing a therapist because she couldn’t handle the feelings boiling up inside of her, the last thing she wanted to do was cause her girlfriend anymore grief when things finally seemed to be going right for her for a change.

Helena knew she should tell Myka that she was really in Salem on a case. She hated lying to Myka, and she swore she wasn’t going to do it anymore, but she couldn’t seem to get the words out. The lies were piling up, and she couldn’t seem to stop telling them. Myka had been so stressed lately, and HG didn’t want to add this to the pile. She didn’t want Myka to worry about her, and she didn’t want Myka to over exert herself in order to help.

The silence was finally broken when, in a voice she hardly recognized as her own, Helena asked Myka to tell her a story. Myka smiled and asked what kind.

“Something with a happily ever after.” Helena begged.

Myka wiped a tear from the corner of her eye, “Once upon a time…”

Helena fell asleep before the promised happily ever after happened, Myka’s voice calming her until her breathing evened out and she slept peacefully. Myka could hear the soft sounds of sleep and she smiled, “I love you Helena, sweet dreams.”

* * *

Myka’s nightmare had morphed, twisted itself so it was no longer the same horror that woke her every night.

She sat up, breathing heavily, hands immediately searching the cold sheets beside her for someone she knew she wouldn’t find. She collapsed back to her pillow with a groan, throwing her arm over her face.

Clearly rehashing the last year’s events had awoken some more deep rooted anxieties in Myka, and she never thought she would actually miss the old nightmare of being murdered over and over.

But there was a silver lining, it would seem, as she opened her eyes and realized there was light streaming through her blinds. She rolled to look at her bedside clock, it professed to be nine in the morning. She had done it, she had actually slept through most of the night. Sure, it was fitful, but she slept longer than an hour!

Her small victory didn’t get her far, however.

She went through the motions of getting ready. Showering, brushing her hair until it shone, her teeth until they bled. Then, when there was no more putting it off, she stood in front of the door of the apartment, her keys in her hand. She wished she knew what fear was keeping her trapped in her own home, but she just couldn’t understand it.

She took a breath, then another, steeling her nerves.

The sun was bright outside, almost warm as it caressed her skin. Myka locked the door before pocketing her keys. She was going to push herself, she needed to get better, so she wasn’t going to give into the fear. She was going to walk.

“Myka!” the shout had her spinning, around to face what her body was telling her was a threat.

It was just Nate, a threat of a different kind, but mostly an annoyance in Myka’s life. She rolled her eyes at herself as her heart beat tried to return to some semblance of normal.

Nate was exiting his apartment, half dressed. His jeans undone, red boxers visible, shaving cream on half of his face, no shoes, a plaid button down open, his hair sticking up at odd angles. Myka quirked an eyebrow at him, “Hey, Nate.”

“Hey, hi,” he hopped from one foot to the other, turning to whisper something urgently over his shoulder.

“Do you need help?” Myka took a step towards him, and relief blossomed in his features.

“Help! Yes, help, I need help,” he nodded, “I need you to take Chrissy for the day, and maybe the night, I don’t know, could you? I’m running late, I need to… I need to go, and I know HG is in Massachusetts or whatever for her college thingy, I need someone to take Christina.”

Myka could see Christina shouldering her bag behind her father, a strange look on her face. She looked back to Nate, pleading in his eyes. This whole situation felt odd for her. This was the first time Myka could remember that Nate was up before noon, and he was clearly trying to make a good impression on someone.

Myka didn’t feel an altruistic bone in her body when it came to Nate. Sure, over the last couple of months he had been becoming _less_ of a douche bag, but she still had strong feelings in opposition to him.

But there was very little Myka wouldn’t do for that little girl, so she found herself nodding, “Sure thing, Nate.”

“Oh my god, you are a life saver,” Nate smiled hugely, and it was easy to see then what Helena had seen in him once upon a time, “I’ll be sure to tell HG you are the world’s best neighbor-slash-friend-slash-ex-fiancée’s-current-girlfriend-slash-kinda-stepmom.”

And there went the potential Myka had seen for the guy. He was cute, but then he did this thing where he would talk… at all… then it all went out the window.

“I’m sure she already knows.” Myka shook her head at him, “Come, on Christina, I was on my way to the book store.”

Christina’s face lit up, her previous melancholy disappearing at the mention of her favorite place in her small world. Myka wasn’t a hundred percent sure that the kid wouldn’t pick the old book store over a trip to Disney Land.

She skipped to Myka’s side, accepting her outstretched hand. She turned to wave to her dad, but he was already closing the door to his apartment. She gave a heavy sigh, sounding much older than the four year old she was.

“Dad has a girlfriend.” The girl spoke without preamble, or much emotion, sounding resigned.

“Oh?” Myka tilted her head at the new information, connecting the dots in her head of his recent actions, so he was pawning off his daughter for a date? That was low, even for Nate, who had cheated on his pregnant fiancée.

“He doesn’t know that I know, but I hear him talking to his friends when they forget I’m there.” Christina became really interested in her shoe laces all of a sudden, and Myka didn’t like the sadness on the small girl’s features.

Myka’s jaw flared in anger, but she reigned it in.

“He’s happier now. He wakes up before lunch and he doesn’t eat all that junk that Mummy yells at him for buying. He asks Mummy or Claudia to watch me more. So I guessed that he got a new girlfriend.”

“How do you feel about that?” Myka asked, feeling like her therapist for a moment.

Christina shrugged, “It’s not like with you and Mummy, I like you, you’re one of the bestest people. Even better than Uncle Charles. I don’t know Dad’s girlfriend, but I see him smile a lot more, like when Mummy smiles with you.”

“You are far too perceptive for a four year old.” Myka chuckled.

“I’m four and a half!” she protested indignantly, “And I can read almost all by myself!”

“My mistake, you are practically a grown woman!” Myka nodded in faux seriousness.

“But I still need help with the big words.” Christina blushed, thinking her outburst might get her in trouble, or make Myka stop reading with her if she knew Christina could do it by herself.

“It’s okay,” Myka shrugged, “Sometimes I need help with the big words too. What don’t you like about your dad having a girlfriend, kiddo?”

“I like that Dad has a girlfriend!” Christina shook her head, “I like that he’s happy and I get to see you and Mummy and Aunt Claudia more.”

Myka shook her head, “Then what’s wrong.”

Christina gave a melodramatic sigh, “Never mind.” And she rolled her eyes, looking exactly like her mother.

Myka didn’t know what she had done wrong, so she let the conversation drop, easy enough as they drew nearer to the campus and the Red Couch.

A smile broke over her young companion’s face when the bell chimed overhead, and Myka released her hand so she could skip off through the stacks.

A college student was leaving Dr. Cho’s office, wiping tears from her face. Myka didn’t mean to stare, but the girl just looked so familiar, and she couldn’t place it. Myka reached behind the counter and pulled out a box of tissues, handing it to the crying woman.

The girl looked a little baffled at the box, then up at Myka, a shy smile, “Thanks. Gosh I must look like a mess.” She pulled out a couple tissues and wiping her face carefully.

Myka returned the smile, trying to hide the fact that she was carefully tracing the other girl’s features, “It’s not a problem. I’ve left Dr. Cho’s office a complete emotional wreck before. But she knows what she’s doing.”

The girl chuckled, her mood lifting slightly, “So you’ve taken her advice before? Even if it was scary?”

Myka nodded, “I did, and it turned out better than I could have ever thought.” Thinking back to all the times Abigale tried to get her to admit her feelings for Helena, “For someone who isn’t married, she gives better love advice than anyone I know.”

“Thanks,” The girl’s smile was genuine, before she finally tilted her head, tucking her black hair behind her ear, her careful brown eyes assessing Myka, “Do I know you?”

“I’ve been asking myself that same question,” Myka admitted, “You go to Fairview, right? What’s your major? Wait, god, that sounded like some awful pick up line.” Myka shook her head.

The girl was no longer crying, but laughter lit her eyes, “I do, I’m a criminology major.”

“That must be it,” Myka nodded, “I’m minoring in crim. I’m Myka, by the way.” Myka offered her hand.

“Emily,” the woman accepted the handshake, “Emily Lake.”

That smile clicked the puzzle pieces together finally, and Myka almost blurted out her realization, but she had embarrassed herself enough for one conversation, “It was a pleasure to meet you. Officially.”

“Same here,” Emily nodded, “I do hope to see you around.”

After she left, Myka turned to look at Abigale, who had left her office quietly during the exchange, “Don’t you think she looks like… someone we know?”

Abigale shrugged, “After a while, all you college kids look the same to me… what’s your name again?”

Myka rolled her eyes, “Very funny, Doc.”

“Enough jokes,” She spun and grabbed a big cardboard box off a stool, walking to Myka and depositing it into her arms, “Time to stock the shelves.”

“I thought I was here for a session?” Myka asked confused, but following her boss none the less.

“Two birds with one stone,” Abigale pulled a book from the box and studied the spine carefully, “Besides, what am I paying you for anyway, these books came in a week ago!”

Myka mumbled an apology. In truth, Abigale knew how Myka’s mind worked, it thrived on order. The best way to get her to open up, was to keep her hands busy.

A four year old walked hurriedly past them, a stack of books bigger than she was in her arms.

“Has my bookstore turned into a daycare?” Abigale grumbled, not that she minded, she had a soft spot for the young bibliophile.

“I’m sorry, Doc,” Myka sighed, “I was leaving my apartment, and Nate asked me to take her. He was getting ready for a date.”

“Is that so? How do you feel about that?” Dr. Cho almost seemed disinterested as she climbed the ladder to place the book in its temporary home.

Myka shrugged, “I don’t really care, I know he’s been sleeping around for probably as long as he’s known he’s had a dick. I’m more worried about Christina, she had a weird reaction to it this morning, didn’t want to talk about it with me.”

“What bothers you more, that she didn’t want to talk about it with you, or that she was upset?” Abigale asked without looking at her.

“That she’s upset…” Myka said before thinking for a moment, “And that I don’t know why or how to fix it. So maybe that she won’t talk to me about it.”

“I think that’s part of your problem, Myka.” Abigale lead them down a new aisle, “You’re always trying to fix everything to make everyone happy.”

“Is that so bad?” Myka challenged, “To want everyone to be happy?”

“No,” Abigale allowed, “What’s bad is the stress is causes you trying to complete this impossible task. Tell me, there is something else bothering you, what is it?”

Myka sighed and silently cursed the doctor’s too perceptive eyes, “The nightmare, it changed.”

“How so?” Dr. Cho finally looked at her.

“I wasn’t being shot, and neither was Christina or Helena,” Myka mumbled, “It wasn’t even a real nightmare. I was in a room, and everyone I loved was in it, but they were all miserable in there, so I opened the door and they all started to leave. One by one. And I was all alone. I tried to leave but the door just brought me back to the same room. I started to get frantic that I couldn’t be with them and that I was stuck there…”

“Right,” Abigale sighed as she looked at Myka, “I’m going to tell you something, and I need you to hear me out. Your attack and run in with this _curiosity_ may have triggered your PTSD, but you were on this road long before any of this happened.”

“What are you talking about?” Abigale could tell that Myka was starting to shut down, which was part of her problem.

“You never deal with your feelings, Myka. You stay so focused on everyone around you that you can’t see your own problems. You never dealt with Sam’s death, or your feelings of inadequacy from your parents. You go from one thing to the next to the next- I don’t think you’ve even properly dealt with Helena’s leaving. You focus so much on everyone else’s happiness that you don’t leave anything left for yourself. You and I, we have a lot of work to do, and your PTSD is only the tip of the iceberg, and not even where we have to start.”

“What do I do then, Doc?” Myka asked, “I mean, it’s gonna take longer than a few weeks to work through all this.” She made a vague gesture to her head, “If what you sy is true, how to I hold out for the other side?”

“This is going to sound ridiculous, but you need a hobby, Myka,” Abigale looked seriously at her, “Not work or school, a real hobby.”

“What, like knitting?” Myka rolled her eyes, “Scrap booking?”

“If you like,” Abigale smirked, unperturbed, “You like writing? You play the guitar? Get back into those things that you love. Do it just for yourself, Myka. Do it to be happy.”

“Be happy,” Myka nodded sarcastically, but she took the doctors words seriously, “You got it, Doc.”

“And another thing,” Abigale took the box from Myka’s hands, “Talk to your girlfriend. Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re weak, Myka. Sometimes, it’s the strongest thing you can do.”

She turned from her patient, working her way to the back of the store where she knew she could find her younger patient reading amongst the stacks of books she had probably already pulled down.

Myka sighed and pulled out her phone. She gave herself a mini-pep talk before dialing the number and waiting for Helena’s greeting.

“Hey, babe, I need to talk to you- wait what?” Myka froze, “I’ll be on the next flight.”


	22. And the Truth Shall Piss You Off

Helena paced the length of her hotel room over and over again, unaware of the hours passing as worry tore at her. Myka had asked her in a clipped tone where she was, then informed her she would be on her way shortly before hanging up without so much as a goodbye. She hadn’t answered when Helena tried to call her back, and she had thus far ignored all of her text messages.

A rap at her door had her spinning on her heel.

“Myka,” she sighed as she pulled her girlfriend into her hotel room.

Myka allowed it, but pulled back when HG went in for a hello kiss, leveling her stare, giving the look that said HG was in a whole lot of trouble.

“Explain yourself.” Myka demanded as she crossed her arms over her chest. She was tired from the long day she was having.

“Right,” Helena worried her locket as she avoided Myka’s glare by staring at her feet, “Well, I was hunting down a curiosity with those Warehouse Agents, and it seems they’ve been captured by the lovely towns folk to be tried as witches.”

Myka rubbed her eyes with the heel of her hands, sighing deeply as she tried to think clearly.

“Why the _fuck_ are you hunting down curiosities with them?” she demanded, “And why did you lie to me?” There was an unspoken _again_ at the end of her outburst that was heard none the less.

“Myka, please,” Helena tried to get her to calm down, not liking the anger and betrayal sparking in Myka’s eyes, the possibilities it held.

“No, Helena, you _lied_ to me,” She shook her head, “You told me that you were going to Boston for school when in reality, you were coming here with those agents to go on a little adventure! Why did you lie to me? Do you even know…?” Myka pulled herself up short, taking a deep breath, realizing she was taking slow steps towards HG.

“I don’t know how you’re even supposed to have a relationship with someone who is constantly lying to you.” Myka knew she was over reacting, but she didn’t care. Fear and anger were not a good mixture. Exhaustion and worry for matters back home only served to worsen it.

“Myka?” Helena’s voice broke and her heart felt heavy, “What are you saying?”

“I’m say that when this is over, you and I need to have a talk.” She rubbed the back of her neck.

Helena licked her lips, nodding in assent, “Okay, darling.”

Myka sighed, “Steve, Claudia and Pete are getting a room for us.” It was then that Helena noticed her lack of baggage, meaning she didn’t plan on staying with Helena, “They want to meet up at the coffee shop down the road to go over what you have so far, they sent me up to get you.”

HG nodded, “Let me get a coat.”

She wished her heart would stop feeling like a stone, she wished she and Myka could hole up and get everything out in the air, she wished she wasn’t afraid of the look in Myka’s eyes when she said they needed to have a talk.

It was a quite ride down the elevator, and Helena searched for _some_ topic to ask Myka about that wouldn’t get shot down. The heavy silence was becoming too much to bare.

“How’s Christina?” She asked finally.

Myka shifted uncomfortably, “Fine.”

HG turned to face Myka now, the tone of her voice conveying evasiveness. She hit the stop button on the elevator now that they were one floor above the lobby.

“What?” HG demanded, looking closely at her girlfriend.

Myka ran her hands through her hair, “Nate asked me to take her this morning, he had a date to go to or something. When we were on the phone, I had her with me at the Red Couch. I couldn’t get ahold of Nate, and we needed Claudia to come with us, so I asked Leena to take care of her until we could get Nate, or until we got back.”

“Why the worry then?” HG demanded.

“Christina’s been acting odd,” Myka was thinking how to word it, “Nate’s new girlfriend has her worried.”

“Worried how?”

“I don’t know, she wouldn’t talk to me.” Myka sighed, “Look, just, the faster we get done with this case, the faster you can talk to her.”

Helena realized there was something about this bothering Myka, but also that she wasn’t going to get her to talk about it anytime soon, so she released the emergency stop on the elevator and it continued their decent.

Pete, Steve and Claudia were standing in the lobby, clearly waiting for the two woman to make an appearance. No one said anything for a moment, feeling the tension between Myka and HG, unsure of how they should approach this situation.

“Let’s go get some coffee so I can catch you all up.” Helena suggested.

It was nine o’clock, and the streets were strangely empty as they walked the two blocks to the Starbucks Claudia had seen, something Steve pointed out.

“They’re probably gathering in the church to discuss how to deal with their witch problem.” Helena sighed.

Pete snorted and HG lifted an eyebrow at him, “What, you’re serious?”

“Indeed I am,” HG opened the door to the coffee shop for Myka to walk through.

They settled in a table in the back, Claudia wasting no time pulling out her laptop and typing away in her curiosity program, filling out different fields and tweaking it a bit. Pulling up video surveillance and news and social media stories.

“Apparently, the locals have been turning on the teenaged girls in town, rounding them up and holing them in county jail, calling them witches. It’s only a matter of time before someone decides to start lynching these poor girls.” Helena sighed as she set their ordered drinks in front of them.

Steve and Claudia watched the survalence of two men dragging a seventeen year old girl into the back of a police cruiser. Another of the police storming the high school, pulling girls out at random and cuffing them tightly, putting burlap sacks over their heads.

“I’m surprised this hasn’t made the news.” Pete’s face scrunched up, “I mean, Fox and CNN haven’t gotten their hands on it yet.”

“It looks like the police are keeping a pretty tight lid on it,” Claudia sighed.

“Curfews, media restrictions…” Myka read over her shoulder the Mayors release to the locals.

“What happened to the two agents?” Steve looked to HG.

“We were supposed to be trying to figure out _what_ the curiosity was, but Sandra was a hot head and began arguing with the police chief when he refused to allow her to see the girls they have in custody.” HG shook her head, “The officers turned on them, saying the girls had corrupted the agents with their witch craft.”

“I think that lynching is coming sooner than you think, HG.” Claudia paled and turned the computer around so they could see what she was seeing.

It was a procession of angry looking older people, leading blindfolded teenaged girls down the road headed towards town hall. It was very cliché with torches and everything. It was beign lead by the town Mayor.

“What’s that?” Myka asked, leaning towards the screen, “That there, in his hand?”

“A bible?” Claudia zoomed in on it, “It looks pretty old I guess, what are you thinking?”

“Did you ever learn about the Salem Witch Trials in school?” Myka asked her, waiting for Claudia to nod in response, “Reverend Samuel Parris, his daughter and niece are the reason for that madness, but…”

“What are you thinking?” Helena asked.

“I’m sure his religious leanings didn’t help the situation…” Myka shrugged, “It’s just a guess. But I’m thinking we should probably hurry and try and stop them before they start burning the witches.”

Claudia pulled out teslas from her seemingly bottomless bag and passed them to the other four, “Go on, you all look more intimidating than I do. I’ll just get in the way.”

They wanted to protest, but Claudia wasn’t going to hear it, “Look guys, you’re the muscle and I’m the brain. That’s the way I like it. Now, go save the day so I can get some sleep, okay?”

Steve smiled at his pseudo-sister before they turned and began to make their way to town hall, following the directions Helena pulled up on her phone.

Light poured from the regal building as they arrived. The four spilt up without thinking about it, Pete and Myka moving one direction, Helena and Steve the other.

The two older friends found themselves on a balcony of sorts, over-looking the large open space currently filled with angry town’s people all talking at once, throwing accusations and encouragement to burn the witch.

The mayor was acting as judge, bringing forward each of the accused. Tears streamed down the confused faces of the girls who plead with their parents, their teachers, their neighbors to let them go home.

Myka and Pete were looking for a way to stop the Madness when Helena walked out with a smirk and her hands in the air, calling for the Mayors attention. Myka’s heart started to race.

“She’s with those two supreme witches!” one of the men in the front called, “She’s a corruptor! A witch! She deserves to burn as well!”

“You’re right!” Helena called out in exasperation, “I am a witch!”

“She has confessed!” the shouts rang out, “Hang her!”

A rope was winding its way to the front, and the Mayor made a grab for Helena. Myka’s shout was caught in her throat and it took all of Pete’s strength to keep her from jumping over the railing.

Helena held up her hand, two fingers pointing and thumb in the air- a mock gun. She took aim at the Mayor and he stopped walking. Looking at her suspiciously.

“Bang!” Helena said with a smile.

A shot of electricity came from behind Helena, seizing the Mayor, causing him to drop the bible he was holding to the ground. The mob stopped moving for a moment, before panic set in and they all tried to make their way for the door.

Helena scrambled forward lifting the bible off the floor and opening it to the page that had Reverend Parris’ name scrawled in looping letters. She pulled a neutralizing bag from her back pocket, dropping the bible in and looking away as sparks erupted.

The crowd calmed down with eerie suddenness, they all looked around confused, some of them doubled over with their heads in their hands.

Myka and Pete rushed to the first floor, none paying them much attention, and helped Helena and Steve remove the bags and bindings from the teenaged girls who ran to their now concerned parents arms. They finally uncovered the two enraged looking agents.

Helena dropped the static bag in their laps with a disgusted shake of her head, “You two have fun cleaning up this mess, my job here is done.”

* * *

It was close to midnight, and Helena couldn’t sleep, so she didn’t bother trying. She had been sitting at the small table in her hotel room, scribbling away in her notebook, trying to think clearly. Once they had gotten back to the hotel for the night, Myka had gotten on the phone to arrange a flight home the following day, closing herself in the hotel room she was share with the other three.

Helena wanted to talk to Myka, but she was scared of what would happen during this talk. She just missed her girlfriend and wanted her there with her so she could at least beg for forgiveness. If there was one thing that bothered Helena more than Myka yelling at her, it was Myka giving her the cold shoulder.

There was a light knock on the door, so quiet that if Helena had been even a little bit asleep, she would have missed it. As it was, she walked to the door carefully, flipping the light on as she went.

Myka was standing there, tapping her foot on the ground, arms crossed, when HG pulled the door back.

“Myka,” Helena greeted, almost shyly.

“Can I come in?” Myka asked, seeming unsure of herself.

“Of course,” Helena stepped back, allowing her entrance.

Helena paced back and forth while Myka stood still. Helena needed to fill the silence, “Look, I know you’re upset with me.”

“Upset?” Myka challenged.

“Perhaps angry is a better word then,” Helena nodded, “Believe me Myka, the last thing I wanted to do was lie to you, and I wanted to do this…” she trailed off, stopping her pacing when Myka took a step towards her.

“I am angry, I’m furious,” Myka agreed, though her face didn’t seem to be agreeing with her as she moved closer to Helena, “But we can deal with it later,” Myka nodded to herself.

She was royally pissed, but more than anything, she had missed Helena, and she didn’t want to fight her yet. There would be time for that later, Myka had decided when she was laying on the bed she had been sharing with Claudia.

She had a very different intent as she took the elevator to Helena’s floor, and her need only grew as she closed the distance between her and her girlfriend.

“What are you-?” Helena began, but Myka promptly silenced her with a slender finger to her lips.

“I don’t want to talk,” Myka shook her head, moving her hand across her girlfriend’s cheek, trailing them softly down the length of her neck, “I talked myself out this weekend, I am so _done_ with talking.”

She leaned forward and kissed HG softly as her hands moved to the buttons on Helena’s shirt. She thought her fingers would shake more, but she had grown bold by her own assertiveness and she made quick work of it until it hung open on Helena’s shoulders.

Helena stilled Myka’s hands, confused by this sudden turn of events, hadn’t she just been preparing to fight for her and Myka’s relationship? And now she was kissing her and disrobing her… and the swirling emotions were making it difficult for Helena to think clearly.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Helena couldn’t recognize her own voice as she spoke lowly to Myka.

Myka licked her lips and nodded, “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

Helena released Myka, allowing her to pull back so Myka could watch her own hands slide over Helena’s pale shoulders and down her arms so the shirt fell forgotten in a pool at their feet. Helena blushed under Myka’s gaze as it traveled slowly over the exposed skin on her torso, the tops of her breasts, her collar bones until their gazes met once more.

“You’re so beautiful,” Myka sighed as she could no longer hold herself back from the absolute perfection before her now, and she closed the distance, this kiss a little less gentle, filled more heat and an undeniable need. And she let her hands wander over the smooth skin she unveiled, leaving a trail of goose bumps in her wake.

Helena loved the way Myka touched her. She hadn’t thought much about having the small of her back caressed, her ribs carefully memorized, her hips brushed by loving thumbs. Not until these things were done by Myka. Now they might be her favorite things. Well, except maybe for the way Myka was kissing her.

Helena didn’t know the symphony she was creating in Myka’s ears of gasps and sighs. Myka let those soft sounds fill her, guide her movements. Before she knew what she was doing, Helena was pushed down to the bed.

HG usually was the one in charge in the bed room, at least she was with her previous partners. But she knew Myka needed feel like she was the one in charge. She didn’t mind though, in fact she found herself extremely turned on by dominant Myka.

Myka looked at her with such an intense concentration, like she was studying for a test on the way Helena looked in this exact moment and she had every intention of getting an A, and maybe a little extra credit as she strode forward, her hands griping the top of Helena’s jeans and popping the button. Helena arched her back slightly to aid with their removal, which Myka did slowly so she could run her hands down the length of her legs as she did so.

Myka took a moment to admire her girlfriend, and she found herself smiling at the thought of Helena actually being _her_ girlfriend. She was gorgeous, smart, and talented and she was all hers. It gave her an extra boost of confidence as she took a step back from the bed.

Helena sat up on her elbows, completely enraptured by the sight before her as Myka grabbed the hem of her shirt, lifting it slowly over her head. Helena’s lip went between her teeth as her eyes greedily devoured every inch of skin they were offered. Myka watched Helena’s eyes grow nearly black in desire as she unbuttoned her pants and kicked them from around her ankles.

HG sat up on her knees, reaching out to grip the top of Myka’s hips, letting her fingers trace lightly over the top of her underwear before yanking Myka’s body flush to her own and kissing her deeply. She wished she had the words to tell Myka how absolutely stunning she was, but her mouth was busy with more important things, so she would just have to show her.


	23. Fall out

The sun slowly crept across the bed in rays that fell from the slanted blinds of the hotel room. Myka watched these beams make their way over their blanket covered bodies. She hadn’t gotten any sleep, partly because of the line that had finally been crossed in hers and Helena’s relationship, but mostly because she had become trapped in her own mid once more. She was a prisoner of destructive thinking, she had known that her entire life. She had just wished her own mind would give her this one moment, this one perfect instance where everything in her life was supposed to be right.

She had finally _done_ it, she had finally gotten over her nervousness, her need for everything to be perfect before she dove head first into the physical aspects in her relationship that had been lacking, like she had always wanted to. She had lacked the practical knowledge, but in the opinion of her currently sleeping lover, she had more than made up for it with her attentiveness and eagerness to please Helena however she wanted.

Helena had slept with more people than she cared to count, men and women, but as far as she was concerned, nothing could compare to the night she spent with Myka. Myka had considerably less comparison material, but even she knew anything else would have paled in comparison.

So she didn’t regret her actions the night before. She didn’t exactly understand them either though. She had been mad at Helena, was still mad at Helena. But something had snapped, her self-imposed restraints perhaps. Watching Helena put herself in the line of fire with Myka separated from her, too far to help, that had put another fear in Myka, adding to her growing list.

She mused that perhaps she would develop agoraphobia if she wasn’t careful. Fear of fear. She guessed it was a good thing she was already seeing a therapist. She ignored the fact flashing in the back of her mind that she hadn’t told Helena that she was getting professional help yet.

Instead she focused on this moment, on the thoughts slowly untangling themselves as she watched the slow rise and fall of her sleeping girlfriend’s chest. She traced her fingers lightly over the pale skin that was softer than silk, connecting her freckles to form a nonessential pattern along her back and ribs. She remembered with that infallible memory of hers how it felt to run her lips and tongue over this skin as it was over heated with passion and want beneath her, she could still hear the gasps and moans that had tumbled from those lips still swollen and bruised from too hungry kisses. The sound of her name spoken as a reverent mixture of plea and praise still echoed in her skull.

No, sex hadn’t solved any of the problems. They all still hung heavily in the air surrounding the young couple. But, if Myka was honest with herself, it made it so much more bearable, even if all it had done was create a new addiction. An addiction of _this,_ of being able to hold her girlfriend so intimately as she slept with a small satisfied smile, her hair mussed and yet somehow still perfect.

Myka figured that even with all the shit they still had to face, she could hold on to this moment for a pleasant place to look back on. It hadn’t been perfect, or at least what she had previously perceived perfect to be. It had been in a hotel room in a city far from their home. It had been in a strange bed with sheets that smelled like commercial use detergent. They had to be on a plane in three hours and Myka was still pissed about the reason they were there to begin with.

But for now, none of that seemed to matter. All that mattered was the warm flush she felt as her eyes traced Helena. All that mattered was the faint scent of her girlfriend’s perfume. All that mattered was that they were _there_ and together. That they had made it to that point despite all the shit they went through, despite the sheer impossibility of it. They had made it.

For the time being, the rest could wait.

Myka kissed Helena’s temple softly before slowly extracting herself from the bed, feeling the sourness of last night. She searched the room for her scattered clothing, gathering it in her arms before moving to the small bathroom. It took her a moment to figure out the shower, and as the water heated up, she looked over her reflection.

She carefully touched the developing bruises on her neck and chest, the distinct bite mark on her shoulder, her lip going between her own teeth as she thought back to how she had gotten these markings and the woman who had given such pleasure administering them.

Myka snapped out of her hormone induced haze as her eyes fell on the wound that puckered between her breasts. She felt sickened as she always did feeling the marred flesh beneath her fingertips. She turned away from herself with an unconscious noise of disgust.

It had been over a month, and not a day had gone by that Myka didn’t wonder if she would ever get over the events of that night. If she would ever be able to live some semblance of a normal life, no more avoiding empty areas or crowded places. Not a time when she didn’t need to have her back to a wall or have a miniature panic attack whenever someone blocked her route to a door unintentionally.

When Myka finally, calmed by the hot water, left the steam filled bathroom, Helena was still sleeping. Myka looked to her sleeping lover, then to the door of the hotel, sighing heavily as she made a decision.

She could talk to Helena on the plane ride… or back in Fairview… for now, she needed to pack, and the talk she needed to have with her would last longer than a few minutes, and she needed to make sure Pete, Claudia and Steve were getting ready, from the way HG had begun to shift, she was clearly close to waking up on her own, so Myka quickly tiptoed out of the room.

She felt terrible for just leaving like that, ignoring the slight vindication that came with it, but she needed distance to think and prepare herself for talking to Helena. And watching her sleepy and happy would only serve to distract Myka, and she would continue to talk herself out of having a serious conversation with her.

So she returned to her room, rousing her friends and searching for her bag, while Helena woke up slowly, the sound of her door clicking shut pulling her from unconsciousness faster, but not fast enough.

Her hand groped the sheets on the other side of the bed, searching, but finding them cold and empty. Helena sat up, pulling the sheet around her chest and looking about.

“Myka?” She called softly to the room, and was met with resounding silence.

HG found her clothes on the floor, but none of Myka’s garments. The bathroom mirror was covered in steam, so the other woman _had_ recently been there. Helena was struck with a pain in her chest that Myka would have just left her there after the night they spent together. The snub, this form of rejection was a trigger.

She drew on a mask that she had made by necessity growing up in her house, having been fortified with her time spent with Nate and after he had gone. She had discarded it after she no longer needed it, having this utter acceptance from Myka. But now, _now_ , it was the only thing she could cling to if she wasn’t going to act irrationally.

She showered, keeping the water icy, trying to freeze out the sting she felt just below the surface, and dressed in fresh clothes. That day had all the makings to be the best day Helena had had in a long while. She should have woken up in Myka’s arms, she should have been able to kiss her good morning. She should be happy and giggly, not angry and hurt.

Helena had every intention to march up to Myka’s hotel room and demand an explanation to her odd behavior, but when she pulled back the door to her hotel room, there stood the object of her pain, a conflicted look on her face, fist half raised as if she had been preparing to knock on the door.

“Myka?” Helena hated the tone that crept up in her voice, the way it cracked over such a simple word, she cleared her voice and tried again, “Myka.”

“Helena,” Myka felt the heat wash over her face, “I wa-was coming to see if you were ready to go? The plane leaves in a couple of hours and we should really be going because you know how long it can take just to get through security…” Myka trailed off when she realized she was rambling.

Helena’s arms crossed her chest, leveling a glare at her girlfriend, “You know, it is really quite strange, you _look_ like my girlfriend, maybe you know her, Myka Bering? And you sure sound like her, but that isn’t possible, because I know that the Myka Bering _I_ know would never leave me while I was still sleeping after the night we had just spent together.”

“Right,” Myka rubbed the back of her neck, staring at the tops of her sneakers.

“ _Right_ ,” Helena repeated, “Care to explain yourself?”

“I had to go back to my room and make sure the others were up,” Myka said after a moment, “I didn’t want to wake you.”

“Why are you lying to me?” Helena asked, knowing Myka’s voice and face well enough to see that something wasn’t fitting there.

“Why did you lie to me?” A spark of fire returned to Myka’s eyes, her fists clenching and unclenching at her sides.

Helena opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Her body was a confusion of conflicting emotions, and she had no idea how to react.

Myka shut her eyes tightly, “Let’s just… let’s just get home. We can talk then.”

Never before had such a simple statement filled Helena with such trepidation. Checking out of the hotel, checking her bags at the airport, finding her seat on the plane… she couldn’t remember doing these things, but suddenly they were on the plane, 30,000 feet in the air and they hit turbulence.

It was the first thing to pull Helena out of her own head as she gripped the arm rests and ground her teeth. A familiar hand smoothed out her fingers before allowing them to clamp down on the offered anchor.

Myka wasn’t looking at Helena, but she could sense her distress, so with out looking up from her book, Myka reached out for her hand, feeling the slight tremor as their fingers interlaced. She brought Helena’s hand to her mouth, placing a soft kiss on her knuckles before allowing their arms to lay on the arm rest once more.

This act, however small, however brief, did more to calm Helena’s beating heart that the pilot saying they had made it out of the worst of the storm.

Claudia, who watched her two friends since they left the hotel that morning, was trying to figure out what it was she was seeing between the two women. While they weren’t talking to one another, and there was an electric storm of tension heavy around them, there was something else different there. The way they unconsciously moved around each other. Claudia originally thought it was because of the fight they surely were in the midst of, but that didn’t explain the small touches they exchanged.

If it weren’t for these moments of unconscious closeness, Claudia would have been worried for their relationship. As it was, a very different possibility occurred to her. After all, Myka hadn’t returned to their hotel room until the morning, with a pink flush to her cheeks and an avoidance of all questions relating to her whereabouts.

“They totally did the do,” Claudia smirked.

“What was that?” Steve lifted one of his head phones up and shot a sideways glace at his pseudo-sister.  

“Nothing, Jinksy,” Claudia shook her head with a secretive smile, “Nothing at all.”

* * *

Myka and Helena drove to Leena’s in silence.

They hadn’t been quiet the entire journey, but they also hadn’t said anything. Their mouths had moved and words came out, but it was nothing of consequence.

It wasn’t until they were standing in Nate’s kitchen, the girl in her room playing quietly while her father was god knows where still, that they spoke candidly at last.

“You lied to me.” Myka repeated her statement from earlier as they faced each other in the small space. Her arms were crossed tightly over her chest, a barrier between her heart and the woman who owned it.

Helena nodded, worrying the locket around her neck as she tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible.

“Why?” That single syllable word, whispered into the still kitchen, held so much pain it nearly broke Helena.

“I was trying to protect you,” She tried, her words holding honesty and hidden truths.

“Protect me from what?” Myka demanded, “From those agents? From their boss? From Sykes? From what, Helena?”

“From myself!” Helena snapped, close to tears now, “From the insanity that I can barely contain most days! Because, Myka, when I saw you on that bed with all the life drained from you, something inside of me snapped, and I knew I would do anything to avenge what happened to you. I knew I would kill the man who shot you and not think twice about it. And I didn’t want you to see that part of me, because I was terrified of myself.”

“Helena,” Myka had tears brimming in her eyes now, but her tone was firm as she stepped forward and held HG’s face between her palms, forcing the Brit to look into her eyes as she spoke, “I love you, and I can’t be without you anymore, so for me, you are going to have to try and let this go. As much as you can.”

“I can’t do that Myka,” Helena shook her head as much as Myka’s grip on her would allow, “I cannot stand by and watch the person I love suffer while the man who caused it runs free. Please don’t ask me to, because I can’t.”

Myka could see that Helena needed this, so she thought for a moment, “Fine, but Helena, you can’t lie to me anymore, for _any_ reason. For my own good or not. I can’t handle it if I think you’re hiding things from me.” There was an unspoken _again_ that seemed to echo all around them, and Helena nodded slightly.

“While we’re getting things out in the open,” Myka released Helena’s face and stepped back, HG immediately missed the contact, and it worried her, the look on her girlfriends face now, “I’d like to warn you that I’m seriously fucked up.”

Her smile didn’t reach her eyes as she continued to speak, “I’m seeing Dr. Cho, for psychological help, not just as my boss or friend. I had like… a mental break, and so…” She rubbed the back of her neck, “I know you didn’t sign up to be with a crazy girlfriend who needs a therapist to get through the weekend, but this is what I need to get better. And I understand if you don’t want…” she trailed off, her own words causing an almost physical pain in her chest.

HG rushed forward and wrapped her arms around Myka, holding her tightly as the taller woman buried her nose into her hair, “I’m not going anywhere, Myka. I love you, and you’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

The noise that escaped Myka was somewhere between a laugh and a sob, and it made HG cling tighter to her normally strong girlfriend, trying to lend what little strength she herself had left.

“Besides, I think it’s best if I talk to someone as well.” HG admitted.

“Abigale?” Myka’s offer was a mumble, but Helena understood well enough.

“No, I’ve got my own shrink,” Helena rolled her eyes, thinking of her own boss, “We’re going to be aright Myka.”

“Promise?” she sounded like a tired little girl.

Helena swallowed thickly, “I promise.”

Myka and Helena spent the day in Nate’s apartment, playing with Christina, watching TV, reading. It was the happiest Myka could remember being in a long time. As the day came to an end it found Christina lying tucked in bed with Myka and Helena laying on either side of them, a story spinning in the air around them.

They left her clutching her stuffed giraffes and snoring softly, her night light casting stars on the ceiling.

They collapsed together on the couch, Helena resting her head on Myka’s shoulder as she idly thought how wonderful it would be to have this for the rest of her life. To have Myka to come home to, to be able to laugh with Christina and tuck her in together. She wanted Myka to be with her forever, and that almost scared her. Her happiness had never been so dependent on that of another.

The sound of the front door opening pulled them both from their light dozing. Myka nearly shot up, but a hand from Helena had her calming her racing heart. So by the time Nate collapsed into the opposite chair, you couldn’t tell that Myka had reacted so violently to someone walking into their own house.

He seemed to be lost in his own thoughts, his clothes rumpled, his face drawn into a contemplative frown. Myka and Helena exchanged a long glace. This was so unlike Helena’s ex, it actually had them worried.

There were no comically awful pickup lines, or flirtatious jokes, no mischievous glint in his eyes, for the first time since Myka had known him, he actually looked like a adult and not an over grown man child.

“Nate?” Helena called softly, causing his eyes to flick up to the concerned looking women across from him, “What’s the matter?”

“She’s pregnant.” Nate’s voice was low, the sound barely reaching awaiting ears, “My girlfriend, she’s pregnant.”

Helena let out a heavy sigh and fell back into the couch, her hand immediately going up to cradle her own head, “Nathaniel, you dunce.”

His eyes flashed with heat for one moment before cooling in resignation, “I know.” He seemed to think for a moment, “It’s going to be different this time, though.”

“Is it?” Helena challenged with a mirthless laugh.

Myka wondered why he was telling them all of this. Didn’t he have friends? Wasn’t there someone, _anyone_ else who he would rather be talking to? It wasn’t as if he actually believed they would make good sounding boards for his worry over repeating the same mistakes that got them to this point in the first place.

“It is,” Nate nodded, making a decision as he looked up at his ex-fiancée and her girlfriend, “I’m going to do things right this time. I’m going to be there for Emily and this baby. I love her, Hel.” He took a breath and looked surprised by his own admission, “I know that I was an ass to you, and I know that I never loved you and you never loved me. I see that now, I see how Myka looks as you and how you look at her and I know I haven’t ever felt that before. Not until Emily. She makes me want to be different, better than I was with you.

“And that’s why,” he took a breath, “That’s why I’m not gonna fight you anymore, Hel.”

“What are you saying?” Helena could feel her own heart beat in her ears.

“I’m surrendering my paternal rights,” he nodded to himself, “I’ll call my lawyers tomorrow. Have him call the judge, I’ll sign whatever papers they give me. She’ll be yours. The only thing I ask is that you let me be in her life still, though I understand if you don’t allow that.”

Helena didn’t seem to know how to react, so Nate went on talking.

“I’ve got a job,” he smiled, “I’m moving out, and I am going to support Emily and this baby. I am going to do what’s right by her. I’m sorry, Helena. I’m sorry I couldn’t give you what you needed in London. I’m sorry I didn’t love you, and I’m sorry that I tried to take Chrissy from you. You’re a good mom, Hel. And I’m going to try and be a good dad.”

He stood up, walking to the couch where both woman sat, dumb struck. He lent and kissed the top of HG’s head before looking seriously at Myka, “Take care of my kid, Mykes. You were always a better parent than me anyhow.”

After gathering his things- clothes, games and toiletries- into a suitcase, he went into his daughter’s room and kissed her forehead, allowing his heart to break for a moment. He may not have loved her mother, but he loved Christina as much as he could have for knowing her in the short time he did. He really hoped that Helena would allow him to be part of her life still, because while he loved Emily, and already loved the life growing inside of her, this little girl sleeping here now was the reason he was grown up enough to be responsible for another life. She was the reason he was strong enough to let go of her for her own good and happiness. Because he could admit now that Helena and Myka would be better for her than he ever could hope to be.

Now he only hoped that Emily and he could raise their baby, could have a love like what he felt in this home between HG and Myka and Christina.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Je regrette de dire que ma dépression a obtenu de la manière de la rédaction de ce.


	24. Steps

Myka tapped her foot insistently on the carpeted floor, her thumb nail between her teeth as she looked out the window at the students rushing by. None of this went unnoticed by the trained psychologist sitting across from her now, but Abigale was content to sit and observe the actions for a moment.

They weren’t the same as she had grown used to. It wasn’t the actions of a person suffering from PTSD. She no longer shot glances at the door throughout their sessions. She no longer jumped at every noise or sat ram rod straight in the chair. The dark circles beneath her eyes were lightening slowly, but steadily as her sleeping got better thanks not only to the pills Abigale prescribed, but also being able to talk them through. She no longer came in disheveled or rumpled, she was slowly becoming more the woman that Abigale remembered from nearly three years ago now.

So what was causing her anxious behavior now?

“How are the dreams?” Abigale finally broke the silence, and was glad to see that Myka didn’t jump at the sound of her voice as she would have a few weeks ago.

“I took your advice, started writing them down in the mornings right when I wake up,” Myka smiled wistfully, “They aren’t all bad anymore, and I can sleep almost all the way through the night now.”

“And when you do wake up?” Abigale asked, writing things on the notepad in her lap without looking away from her young friend.

“Helena’s usually there, she tells me it’s not real and that I’m safe,” Myka left out the detail that Helena calming her more often than not lead to them having sex. The doctor already warned her that an amped up sex drive could be a side effect of the PTSD, and she didn’t want that to be true.

“What about the dorms?” Abigale asked, “Have you been able to walk past them?”

“With Helena living in Nate’s old apartment, I don’t need to walk past the dorms.” Myka twiddled her thumbs.

“I take that as a no then.” Abigale chuckled.

“No,” Myka shook her head, “Well, I walked to the edge of the parking lot, before I had to go.”

“That’s good, Myka,” Abigale nodded with a smile, “That’s progress. So, have you made any recent life changes?”

Myka’s slight start told Abigale she was getting close to whatever was causing anxiety in Myka, “Well, yeah, I have Trailer now. Dumb dog follows me everywhere,” Myka rolled her eyes, unwilling to show how much she actually liked him.

He had been sitting outside one of Myka’s classes one day, just in the hallway, acting as if he belonged there. He had ignored every other student milling by, until she walked out and he went right to her side.

Myka looked around before looking down at the red border collie who tilted his head to her. She pat his head softly with a chuckle before walking on. It didn’t take long for Myka to realize that the dog was walking at her side. She looked around her once more, but no one seemed to notice her or the dog.

“Go home.” She told him with a serious voice, waving away from her.

The dog sneezed at her.

“Whatever.” She continued to walk away.

He followed her all the way to Leena’s before sitting attentively at the door as she went inside to meet Helena and Christina for lunch. Once the little girl saw the dog, Myka knew she was a gonner.

They played at the park together, since both seemed to have boundless amounts of energy, while Helena and Myka looked on.

“Did he have tags on him?” Helena asked, picking at a blade of grass by her leg.

Myka knew that tone of voice as she looked over the rim of her glasses at her girlfriend, “No. He’s clean and well fed though, clearly he’s used to being around people. Someone is probably missing him.”

“Perhaps we should hold on to him… just until someone claims him,” Helena suggested with a shrug, “We could put fliers out. And I think it would be better for him than taking him to the pound.”

The dog, as if knowing he was being talked about waddled over with his tongue lolling out of his mouth and tail wagging a mile a minute. He flopped down in front of Myka before flipping onto his back, asking to be petted.

Myka sighed and scratched his belly before looking up at Helena and Christina, each with twin faces of begging. “Fine.” She chuckled.

They made fliers and hung them around town, and around campus, but no one ever called to claim him. When Myka took him to the vet to get him checked out, they asked for a name and she wrote Trailer without thinking about it, the dog hardly let her out of his sight, so it seemed a good fit.

If he didn’t have a good home before, he was absolutely spoiled by all of Myka’s friends now. And if she was honest, she felt better having him there.

“That explains the dog camped out in front of my store,” Abigale smiled, “But not why you seem so anxious now.”

Myka rolled her eyes, “Well, midterms are this week, and if I don’t ace them, there is no chance for me to pull out with a passing GPA this semester.”

Abigale nodded, knowing that Myka had great difficulty the first half the semester with her classes, “You’ve been studying and doing extra work though, haven’t you?”

“Yeah,” Myka allowed, “And actually, with midterms Claudia and Helena have had an uptake in business fixing computers, so it’s good to see them not worried about money for once. It doesn’t hurt that Helena’s no longer supporting Nate, I suppose.”

Abigale noticed the deflection, and turned it back on her patient, “How are things between you and Helena?”

“Fine,” Myka answered automatically, before taking a breath, “Better than fine actually. She’s asked me to move in with her.”

Abigale nodded, “And how do you feel about that?”

Myka shrugged, “I mean, we’ve practically been living together since we’ve started dating, and for a long time before that…”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t be nervous about it, Myka.” Abigale chided.

“Okay, yeah, I’m nervous.” Myka allowed, “This is a serious step, right? I mean, we are in a serious relationship, but this is a big step, right?”

“Are you nervous about living in a new space, or sharing this space with Helena?” Abigale asked.

Myka thought for a moment, allowed herself to imagine how she would feel if Helena was moving into her apartment instead. The nerves lessened exponentially and the elation rose to take it’s place. “The new space.” Myka finally admitted.

“Alright,” Dr. Cho nodded, “Have you spoken to Helena about it?”

Myka shook her head, “No. I want to live with her, I do. I’m just… it doesn’t make sense, I know that, just the thought of moving freaks me out a bit.”

“Alright, Myka, just remember that you are making this space your own, you’ll still have your things and you’ll be with Helena still. And Make sure you _talk_ to your girlfriend about this.”

Myka nodded, “Yeah, yeah, I think we learned our lesson about what happens when we don’t talk about things.”

“Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way,” Abigale leveled a stare at her, “Why don’t you tell me what’s really bothering you.”

“My family,” Myka sighed.

“Are you going home over the holidays?” Abigale asked.

“Yeah,” she nodded, “My mom called and she said she wants a family thanksgiving since I haven’t given her one since I left for college.”

“Will you be bring Helena and Christina with you?” the doctor watched Myka carefully.

“She’s met my parents before.” Myka interjected, seeing where this line of questioning was leading her.

“Yes, only now you’ll be introducing her as your girlfriend.” Dr. Cho pointed out, “Does that make you nervous?”

“No,” She knew she answered too quickly to be believed, “Maybe.” She allowed a moment later instead.

Dr. Cho thought for a moment, trying to figure out how to best help Myka, “You just need to remember that they are your family, even if they don’t know how to react to you having a girlfriend, remember that they will love you. And that you still have your _other_ family who love you no matter what.” She smiled, referring to Myka’s friends, acknowledging the family they had set up around themselves.

“Thanks doc,”

* * *

Helena sat in Leena’s office most afternoons now, between shifts and classes, slowly opening up more and more to her boss and friend.

She knew she was probably violating some law or rule telling Leena everything she did, but she really didn’t care. She needed somebody to confide in, someone who could help her keep a firm handle on her anger so it didn’t just explode one day.

She wasn’t sure if Leena believed half of what she told her, but the older woman trusted HG enough to not question it. So Helena confided in her all of her fears and anxieties. It was on Leena’s suggestion that Helena no longer take jobs from MacPherson, that she stop perusing Walter Sykes, at least for the time being, she couldn’t be there for her girlfriend and hunt down a deranged individual at the same time.

“I have no idea what to do with myself,” Helena complained as she watched Leena wipe down the already spotless counters, “Ever since we put Christina in Preschool I feel like I have too much free time on my hands.”

“We?” Leena spoke with a sly smile, “So I take it you and Myka are doing well then?”

Helena smiled as she always did at the mention of her beloved, but Leena was more interested in the color shift in her aura. It was slight, but it instantly caught her attention.

“What?” she asked.

“I’ve asked her to move in with me.” Helena long since learned there was no point trying to keep anything from her too perceptive friend, “She hasn’t given me an answer yet, and I fear I may have pushed too far too fast. I’m afraid she’ll with draw from me, she’s made so much progress, what if I’ve ruined that?”

“I wouldn’t worry about Myka pulling away from you HG,” Leena rolled her eyes, “That girl is crazy about you. And even if she decides she’s not ready to live with you yet, that doesn’t mean she won’t want to eventually. Don’t read too much into it. If you over analyze this situation, it’s only going to hurt you both in the end.”

Helena nodded, but she kept worrying her locket.

“If you’re that worried about it, you need to talk to her about it, it doesn’t do wither of you any good to be second guessing each other’s commitment.” Leena scolded.

“It isn’t that.” Helena assured her.

“Then what?” Leena gave her full attention now.

“She’s asked me to accompany her to her parents’ for the holiday.” Helena picked her nails.

“And?” Leena quirked an eyebrow at her, “Isn’t that a good thing?”

“It is,” Helena agreed.

“So what’s the problem?” Leena crossed her arms.

“Her parents.”

“You’ve met them before, right?” Leena asked, “I thought you said they liked you?”

“Yes, well that was before I began dating their daughter, before they knew I had a child out of wedlock. What if they decide they don’t like me now?” Panic slowly dripped into Helena’s tone.

“Are you worried that they won’t like you or that their opinion will affect how Myka sees you?” Leena probed.

“I thought you weren’t a psychologist?” Helena mumbled.

“And I thought we were done being evasive?” Leena challenged.

Helena sneered, avoiding eye contact for a moment as she clung to her stubbornness for a few more seconds before letting it go with a sigh, “Alright, I’m nervous about them trying to convince Myka that she shouldn’t be with me.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I have ever heard,” Leena scoffed, “Myka isn’t ever going to listen to her parents opinions about you, HG. Myka loves _you_ , and I can promise you she’ll pick you over them if made to choose.”

“How can you know that?” Helena’s eyes begged while her tone was flat, “She’s always sought their approval, what if I damage her chances of getting it?”

“I have a feeling that nothing I say is going to convince you otherwise,” Leena shook her head, “So it’s up to Myka to show you that you mean more to her than her parents opinions. But here’s the thing, Helena.” That got the Brit’s attention, Leena hardly ever called her by her first name, “She is going to need your support in Colorado, not your self-pity. Remember that.”

* * *

Helena came home that evening to Steve and Pete carrying things in and out of their apartment, the things they removed were toted across the road to Helena’s own apartment. The things going in she recognized as her former roommate’s.

She found her girlfriend standing in her kitchen, directing the boys on where to put boxes.

“Hey, babe.” Myka smiled and leant in to kiss Helena’s lips, “How was work?”

“Work was fine,” Helena’s voice hid none of her confusion, “Did you pick Christina up from school?”

“Yeah,” Myka nodded before shouting something at Pete, “She’s with Claudia and Trai next door.”

“I’m surprised that dog was willing to leave your side,” Pete scoffed as he walked past.

“He likes her more than he likes me,” Myka insisted, “Which is fine by me.”

“Er,” Helena interjected before they could continue bantering across the apartment from each other, “I’m sorry, could someone explain to me what is happening?”

“Pete and Steve are helping me move out and Claudia move in,” Myka froze before looking worriedly over to her girlfriend, “You still wanted me to move in, right? You didn’t change your mind or anything, did you?”

“No!” Helena put her hands up, “Of course I still want you to move in.” she reassured her with a smile, “And how long did it take for Claudia to call dibs on your room?”

Myka’s smile returned, “She was making measurements before I told her I was moving out.”

They shared a laugh at the antics of their younger friend.

Moving Myka in was simple enough, and she and Helena spent the remainder of the day making the space _theirs._ The first night was difficult. Waking up in a panic from one of her nightmares, the confusion of being somewhere that wasn’t her own bed only added to the terror. But Helena calmed her easily enough, remembering not to try and restrain Myka’s thrashing, using only her voice to bring her back to reality.

Aside from that, Myka genuinely enjoyed living with Helena and Christina. It was nice coming home to her girlfriend and her surrogate daughter. She supposed she always had Steve and Pete to come home to over the last two years, but more often than not, their social calendars kept them separated most days. Waking up to Helena every morning was better than coffee.

The only downside their first week of living together, was the struggle for Myka to keep her hands off of her girlfriend so she could study for her tests. She thought it was just her hormones that kept her eyes glancing up every time Helena would walk by her as she studied. It wasn’t until one night that she realized Helena was doing it on purpose.

Myka had been lying on the floor of the living room, deeply immersed in studying for her final test of the week, when Helena gracefully lowered herself to the floor across from Myka, also laying on her stomach, but wearing considerably less clothing.

“Aren’t you done yet?” Helena asked with exaggerated nonchalantness as she took the pencil from Myka’s hand and began to twirl it between her fingers.

“Almost, Hel,” Myka sighed, finally looking up to try and get the pencil back, but her eyes got stuck on her girlfriends cleavage so close to her face, “What are you…?”

“Me?” her tone was far too sweet and saturated with innocents as she tilted her head at Myka, “Oh nothing, I’m just a tad bored is all.”

She rolled so she was on her back and Myka could see she was wearing nothing but her bra and panties. Myka knew she was staring, but she couldn’t help it. Even though she _knew_ what Helena was doing, she couldn’t do anything but go along with it, “Oh? And why is that?”

“My girlfriend would rather study for her ethics exam then spend time with me,” Helena dramatically threw her arm over her eyes, “I fell so ignored!” she faux sobbed into the crook of her elbow, “Perhaps you could entertain me instead?”

She peaked out of her arm so she was given an upside down view of Myka, whose jaw was slack and eyes dilated with desire as they still traced over the contours of Helena’s body.

Myka was hardly listening to her speak, and she definitely wasn’t studying anymore, but she scrambled over until she straddled her girlfriend’s stomach, pinning her arms above her head and placing kisses on her neck, “If I fail tomorrow it’ll be your fault, you know.”

“I guess you’ll just have to punish me then,” Her voice sent a ripple of desire through Myka that settled between her thighs, and HG knew that she had won the tug of war she had been playing all week between school and herself over Myka’s undivided attention.

* * *

Myka spent the better part of Friday constantly refreshing her web page that displayed her grades, waiting for her teachers to post the midterm grades.

At 5:01, the page finally changed. She had three A’s and one B. Her initial reaction was relief, because it meant she was well on her way to passing the semester without damaging her academic career. But the longer she stared at the B the worse she felt about it. It was her first B since high school, and it was in Criminology of all things.

Helena wrapped her arms around Myka’s waist from behind as she rested her head on her shoulder, looking at the computer screen, “That’s fantastic, love.” She placed a kiss behind Myka’s ear, “Far better than I’ve done this term.” By far better, Helena meant she had gotten two A’s, a B, and a C in her classes, and she was glad for them, seeing as she worked two jobs and had a daughter to care for.

“I think that deserves celebration.” Helena insisted.

“Ice cream?” Christina perked up from where she sat across the table coloring.

“Mmmm, I don’t know…” Helena tilted her head, “What do to think, Myka?”

“Please, Mom, can we?” Myka’s eyes flashed up to see Christina’s dark eyes focused on her, her lower lip jutting out in a pouty face as her hands clasped in front of her.

“Sure.” Myka’s voice squeaked out.

“Push over,” Helena chuckled in Myka’s ear, “Go put your coat on, darling.”

“Mom?” Myka looked questioningly up at her girlfriend, all thoughts of her grades out the window now.

“Does it bother you if she calls you that?” Helena asked seriously.

Myka thought for a moment, did it bother her? No, she actually quite liked it, and she found herself smiling, “Not at all.”

* * *

With Myka, and Pete taking their girlfriends home, and Steve and Claudia returning to New Jersey for thanksgiving, they decided to have their own Thanksgiving on Saturday.

Myka and Helena worked on making sweet potatoes and the ham while Steve and Pete worked on the mashed potatoes and Turkey and Amanda worked on the other side dishes- everyone decided it would be best to keep Claudia out of the kitchen all together, so they tasked her with the duty of watching Christina and Trailer.

They gathered at apartment 13 for the celebration. Playing rounds of Mario Kart on the Nintendo, listening to Myka and Claudia play the guitar while Trailer howled along. This small, broken family was happy for the time being, and they reveled in it.

They invited Abigale and Leena as well, and rather than it being awkward to have their bosses/therapists there, it only added to the good vibes they were all feeling. Abigale and Leena were accepted easily into the fold.

They all basked in the laughter and good food, sharing stories and trying to one up each other with their misadventures. For the first time in a long time, there was no sense of urgency, no fear or dark cloud hanging over them. No one was waiting for the other shoe to drop and no one worried about what tomorrow would hold.

They were each only grateful for the friends, for the _family_ that surrounded them now.

And they were happy.


	25. "Family"

The plane ride was more stressful then Myka expected it to be. Not because of the packed airport, or the screaming kid three rows back, or even the brief moment of turbulence. Myka had grown used to riding in a plane with Helena, knew that flying stressed her out, and she had expected something similar from her daughter.

Christina was stressed out, but she was far more concerned with the fact that Trailer had to ride with the luggage and couldn’t sit with her. She wasn’t bothered by the flying hunk of metal that carried them, it was one big adventure to her. No, she thought it wasn’t fair that Trailer got stuck in a crate. It didn’t help that since they checked the dog in he started whimpering loudly, making the four year old tear up as well.

The two and a half flight felt like an eternity, trying to keep her stress in check while keeping Christina calm and Helena from ripping the arm rests off as well as Pete chewing a guy out who leaned over his seat to flirt with Amanda.

It seemed that once they left the airport, Myka was the only one still stressed. Pete, having the memory and attention span of a ferret, was distracted with picking out a rental car for the week, Amanda trying to get him to pick something practical and failing. Helena, now that her feet were on the ground, was more interested in snapping pictures of her four year old trying to walk a stubborn Trailer who seemed to be holding a grudge for locking him up.

“Hey babe?” Myka sidled up to Helena, “do you mind if I go to see my parents first? I mean, I don’t want Christina caught in the middle of anything if they react… poorly.”

Helena studied her girlfriends pale face, the way she fidgeted and worried her lower lip between her teeth. Myka was nervous about coming out to her parents, that much was obvious, and it elicited a similar response in HG, though she managed to hide it a bit better.

“Sure thing, love,” Helena heard herself saying, “I’ll take Christina and Trai to get settled in at the hotel, and we can meet up for lunch in a couple of hours.”

Her words had a visible calming effect on Myka as Pete and Amanda joined them with two sets of keys and luggage.

“I think I’ll join Helena to the hotel so I can get myself cleaned up a bit before I see your mom.” Amanda brought her blonde hair up in a ponytail, needing something to do with her hands as she suffered from her own bought of nerves.

“Uh, okay?” Pete looked like a confused puppy.

“I guess that means you’re stuck driving me to the book store,” Myka nudged Pete with her own shoulder, sensing Amanda needed him distracted, “Let’s go see what over-compensation you’ve picked out for us to drive.”

“Over-compensation?” Pete grimaced as he lifted his and Amanda’s bags while Myka grabbed hers and HG’s, leaving their girlfriends to wrangle the dog and child.

Myka snorted as they arrived at the two vehicles the valet had parked side by side. The black 4runner that Amanda held the keys to was something that Myka would have picked, considering they were driving a four year old around, and as she loaded the luggage into it, she was glad to see a car seat in the back. Now, the white charger with red racing stripes just screamed Pete, and she rolled her eyes up at him now.

“What?” he demanded.

“Yeah, totally not over compensating for anything.” Myka shook her head.

Myka kissed Helena sweetly and promised to call her after she had a chance to talk to her parents. Myka leaned in to the car to kiss Christina’s dark curls as she put the safety belt over her, “Take care of, Trailer, kid, I’ll see you in a bit.”

Christina nodded, taking her charge very seriously, as Myka shut the side door.

The tension that filled the car as Pete and Myka drove to the book store was making Pete feel dizzy. It was bad enough that his girlfriend had been acting odd, he couldn’t handle the same weirdness form his best friend as well.

“Okay, spill,” Pete demanded, purposely missing the turn that would lead them to Bering and Sons’ and Myka protested, “What’s got you biting your nails until they bleed and wearing a hole in the floorboards?” he reached over and pulled Myka’s hand from her mouth.

“What am I supposed to tell them, Pete?” Myka asked, knowing there was no getting out of this conversation while he had her trapped in a moving vehicle.

“Tell who what?” Pete scrunched up his face in confusion, looking at Myka instead of the road, which Myka promptly scolded him for.

“Mya parents, Pete,” Myka sighed as she calmed her racing heart after they narrowly missed rear-ending a truck, “How am I supposed to tell my mom and dad that I’m dating a woman?”

Pete tilted his head, seeming to give it actual thought for a moment before he shrugged, “Bake ‘em a cake that says  _‘I’m Gay!’_  in, like, rainbow colors.”

Myka punched him in the arm, “That isn’t helpful, Pete!” she complained, but she was fighting a smile, so it took some bite from her words.

“Look, Mykes, what I’m about to say may sound harsh, but I love you, okay? So hear me out,” Pete shot his squirming best friend a glare to tell her to settle down, “I don’t think it matters what your parents think or say to you.”

“But Pete-,” Myka protested, but was quickly cut off.

“No, Myka,” Pete shook his head, “First off, you are an adult. You didn’t need your parents support for the first twenty two years of your life, and you don’t need it now. You love Helena, right?”

“Yes,” Myka nodded, “I do.”

“And you love Christina?” Pete continued.

“Of course,” Myka felt a bit defensive now as she sat straighter.

“Then that’s all that matters,” Pete declared, “Me, Steve, Claud, we love you no matter what.  _We_  are your family, Helena and Christina, they are your new family. So, just remember that, when you go in there, there are people who love and support you no matter what your mom and dad say.”

Myka and Pete sat in silence, parked across the street from the bookstore for a few moments, allowing Myka to take her therapists advice and try and think through what she was feeling.

“I’m not,” she began, feeling flustered, “I’m not so much worried about what they say to me, about me.” Myka refused to meet Pete’s eyes, focusing instead on a lose thread at the hem of her shirt, “I’m worried what they’ll say to or about Helena, or god forbid, Christina. I can handle them, Pete, I’ve  _been_  handling them my whole life. But I don’t think I can handle it if they talk bad about them. I’ll snap, Pete. I swear, I will.”

“Well,” Pete ran a hand through his hair, growing shaggy once again, “Let’s not burn bridges before we know what’s on the other side of them, yeah?”

Myka smirked up at him, “When did you get all zen on me, Lattimer?”

He shrugged, his face flushing slightly, “What can I say, I can only tune Steve out so much.”

Myka sighed heavily before looking across the road, “I guess it’s now or never,” she looked to Pete one last time, soaking up what strength her offered her, “I’ll see you and Amanda for lunch?”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Pete smiled, “I mean, there will be food, right? How could I not?”

“And just when I thought you were going soft on me,” Myka laughed as she exited the ridiculous car.

The bell above the door chimed, and she was surprised to find the floor empty. She went up the stairs to her family’s apartment, walking to the kitchen where she heard sounds of a coffee maker brewing.

“Hey, Mom,” Myka greeted as she moved around the counter.

“Myka!” Jeannie Bering smiled widely at her eldest daughter, “When did you get here?”

“We just flew in,” Myka waved off this line of questioning, “Why’s no one in the store? Where’s dad?”

“Your sister’s supposed to be down there,” Jeannie sighed heavily as she poured a mug of coffee for herself and one for her daughter, “And your father, well, he hasn’t been feeling well, I think he’s in his study now.”

“Okay,” Myka nodded, making no move to look for her dad, instead staring down at the dark liquid in her hands and absorbing it’s warmth that leaked through the ceramic mug.

“How have you been, dear?” Jeannie looked at Myka over the rim of her glasses, and Myka knew it wasn’t a  _real_  question, it was an opening for a lecture and Myka could practically hear it already, so she waited for her mom to reach her point instead, “You know, I was looking over the insurance statements, and I saw that you were in the hospital  _twice_  in September? What happened, Myka?”

Myka sighed, trying to remember the cover story, “Well, I hit my head when I was visiting Kurt down in Fresno, I had to get checked out to make sure I didn’t have a concussion.”

Jeannie made a noise that was a mixture between sympathetic and scolding, and Myka figured you had to be a mother to really master that tone.

“It’s okay, Mom,” Myka assured her, “You know I’m a total klutz. And the second one, well, I got mugged, and I went to get my injuries checked at the hospital in Fairview.”

“Myka!” Jeannie shook her head.

“I’m fine Mom, honestly.” Myka reassured her.

“Well alright,” Her mom busied herself for a moment adding cream and sugar to her coffee before turning back to Myka, “And where is Kurt? Didn’t he come with you?”

Myka wanted to hit her forehead, she forgot she hadn’t really told anyone that her and Kurt, “No, Mom, I’m not with Kurt anymore.”

“What?” Jeannie tilted her head, “Why did he break up with you?”

“I broke up with him, Mom,” Myka rolled her eyes, as if Kurt dumping her would be the sole reason they were no longer dating.

“Honey, why?” her mom shook her head, as if Myka were being a foolish child, “He was such a good kid, where are you going to find another like him?”

“I’ve already found someone else, Mom,” Myka felt the heat she was feeling leak into her tone, “Someone better, who I love very much.”

“Oh?” Jeannie quirked a skeptical eyebrow, “And just who is this person? Why didn’t you bring him home to meet us?”

“I did,” Myka nodded, “I just wanted to talk to you first before I brought her over.”

“What?” Jeannie was pulled up short by the pronoun.

Myka steeled her nerves, “I’m dating Helena, now Mom. I have been for a few months. And before you ask, yes it is serious. I love her, Mom. It isn’t a phase or me rebelling, it’s the real thing.”

Jeannie opened her mouth, to say what, Myka wasn’t sure, but she was cut off by a bellow of pain that echoed through the apartment. That had both women scrambling to find the source, following the now chocking noises to her father’s study.

Warren Bering had been sitting in his reading chair when the convulsions hit. Myka and Jeannie found him sprawled and still slightly shaking, until he jerked violently once more before stilling. Myka was trying to convince herself that what she was seeing wasn’t all real. Surely his eyes didn’t have that distant, empty look in them, his face couldn’t be contorted in pain, and his veins definitely shouldn’t be black beneath his skin.

Books had been scattered and knocked to the ground by Warren’s flailing limbs. Myka tripped over them now rushing to her father’s side, all years of animosity gone in a single instant and she was just a daughter scared for her daddy’s life.

She pressed a shaky hand to his throat but her heart was beating too heavily for her to feel a pulse. She settled for placing her ear on his chest and holding her own breath until she felt his chest rise and fall slightly.

“Mom, call an ambulance.” She barked over her shoulder to her mom who seemed to be in shock, “Mom!” she shouted again.

Jeannie started, before spinning on her heel in search of a phone.

Myka pulled her father from the chair so he lay on the floor. She kept his head in her lap so he wouldn’t hit it on the floor should he start to seize again.

“Come on, Dad,” She whispered, “Come on…”

There was a gurgling noise and then a wet sounding cough as Warren Bering slowly came to. His eyes were bloodshot and he glanced around confused.

“Myka?” he croaked softly.

“Shh, its okay, Dad,” Myka placed her hands on his shoulders, stilling his movements, “Don’t try to move, okay? Mom’s calling an ambulance for you now.”

Warren opened his mouth to protest making such a fuss, but his oldest daughter was quick to cut him off with a stern look, “I don’t want to hear it, you just had a seizure, you are getting in an ambulance.”

Myka could hear the sirens now, and it was only a matter of time before two men in medics uniforms came into her father’s study and brushed her out of the way. They put a neck brace on him before strapping him to a board to be carried out on.

The medics looked to the two Bering woman, and Myka motioned for her mom to join them in the ambulance, “I’ll meet you at the hospital.” She assured her.

Only after the ambulance had pulled away did Myka allow herself a moment to feel the panic causing her hands to shake. It took her three tries to dial the right number, but she finally got her phone to call Helena.

She sat on the ground in front of Bering and Sons’, pulling her knees up so she could rest her forehead on them, as the dial tone rung in her ear.

“Hello?” HG answered, but was met with only the sound of someone’s breath hitching, “Myka? Darling, are you alright?”

“Helena,” Myka took a steadying breath, feeling the calm spread through her that always came at the sound of her girlfriend’s voice, “Can you come pick me up from my parent’s and drive me to the hospital?”

“What happened? Are you alright?” HG’s words were slurring together, her accent worsening as her anxiety grew, “I-I’ll come get you, I’m walking out the door right now. Christina! Come on, dear we have to-we have to go!”

“Helena!” Myka snapped, “Breath, Helena, I’m fine, it’s not me, I’m fine.” The American figured she should have probably started with that information considering her track record, but she wasn’t exactly thinking clearly at the moment.

“What happened?” Myka could hear shuffling in the background as well as the sound of keys jingling.

“My dad, he had a seizure or something,” Myka shook her head, “I don’t know, he was awake when the ambulance took him, but…”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Helena reassured her girlfriend as she worked to get her daughter’s jacket zipped up.

Myka didn’t want to hang up the phone, even though neither of them were speaking, they didn’t have a choice though once Helena began driving.

Myka isn’t sure how long it took for HG to pull up in front of the bookstore. She only knew they had arrived when she felt an arm wrap around her waist. Myka looked up to find Helena and Christina sitting on either side of her.

“Are you ready to go to the hospital, my love?” Helena asked softly.

Myka nodded and struggled to her feet, “I have to lock up the store… Tracy was supposed to be here, but I don’t know where she went.”

Helena pursed her lips, “I’ll deal with the store if you get Christian buckled in.”

Myka agreed, though it wasn’t really her choice once Christina wrapped her small hand around Myka’s and looked up at her with a small, encouraging smile.

Helena walked through the bookstore, looking behind the desk, in the back area, through the shelves, before heading up stairs. She found Myka’s room easily, though someone else perhaps wouldn’t have been able to tell it was a bedroom at all since it was filled with boxes. The thing that gave it away was the wall of bookshelves, empty now, as well as the dust covered achievement awards from fencing as well as school.

Helena sighed and continued her brief search. The study, filled with old looking books, her parent’s room, the kitchen and living rooms, were all empty. The final room Helena came across, she opened the door slowly, and found Myka’s younger sister asleep in her bed, ear phones playing music in her ears.

Helena was taken off guard for a moment. It had been a few months since she had seen Myka’s younger sister, and at the time they met, HG could only see their differences and wonder how they were related. Now though, with her face peaceful, closed eyelids hiding her honey colored eyes and her dark hair splayed out around her, she could see how much they actually did resemble one another. That’s how she was able to detect the small flash of pain on Tracy’s face even as she slept.

Helena sighed and walked to the edge of the bed, placing her hand on Tracy’s head. The younger woman had a fever, that much Helena could tell, and she looked pale as well. HG decided not to wake her, instead leaving her a note on the bed side table where she would see it upon waking.

After grabbing the keys from a catchall from the living room, Helena hurried down the stairs and locked up the doors.

Myka was sitting in the passenger seat of the 4runner, her arm reaching back at an angle that couldn’t be comfortable, but was the only way she could keep contact with the concerned four year old in the back.

“I think your sister is ill,” Helena informed her as she pulled the seatbelt across her chest, “She was upstairs asleep in her bed, but she felt warm. I left her a note explaining where we went with my number at the bottom so she could get a hold of one of us when she wakes.”

Myka smiled gratefully at her, her eyes suspiciously bright and Helena knew she was fighting tears.

Once at the hospital, Myka and Helena held hands while HG kept Christina on her hip. By the time they got a nurse to direct them to where Warren was being looked at, his doctor was finishing telling him and his wife what he believed happened.

Helena opted to stay in the waiting room with her daughter while Myka went to check on her parents.

Warren was sitting up, buttoning his shirt while the doctor was giving Jeannie instructions.

“Dad?” Myka called softly as she stood in the doorway.

“Hey, kiddo,” Warren smiled, “Have you come to bust your old man out of here, or what?”

“Mr. Bering, I really think you should stay in the hospital overnight so we can observe you.” The doctor looked to the women in the room for help.

“Do you know what caused his seizure?” Myka asked, knowing it would do no good trying to keep her father in the hospital, the stubbornness of Warren Bering rivaling only that of his daughter.

“I’m afraid not, he’s lucid, and his scans came back clean.” The doctor’s face twisted in confusion, reminding Myka of the doctor who had the misfortune of trying to figure out how  _she_  had healed so quickly after sustaining a gunshot wound to the chest.

Something about that thought pricked in the back of Myka’s mind as her thoughts began racing at a hundred miles an hour.

“I’m willing to discharge you, Mr. Bering, as long as you take it easy for the next few days. And Mrs. Bering? If he had another seizure, you need to bring him back here right away.” The doctor looked at them sternly before making his retreat.

Myka looked to each of her parents, wondering on the look they were sharing with one another before she broke the tension, “Come on, we’ll take you back home.”

“We?” Warren asked as he accepted an arm up from his daughter.

“Yeah, Helena picked me up, she’s in the waiting room, now.” Myka watched for her parent’s reactions closely, but they reviled nothing to her.

At the nurse’s station, they stopped to fill out paperwork, and having seen them, Helena and Christina slowly made their way to the Berings.

“Mr. Bering?” Helena spoke softly, not wanting to startle anyone, Warren and Jeannie turned around together, but whatever they were about to say was lost when they saw their daughter’s girlfriend balancing a young child on her hip, “Are you alright? Myka said you had a seizure?”

Warren looked up the woman who he had liked when he first met. She was charming, and smart and he could see her commitment to his daughter from the beginning when they had just been friends. Now, though, he wasn’t sure how he felt about her. He needed time to adjust to the news his wife had shared with them while they had been alone together.

“I’m fine,” Warren said gruffly, more because he was tired of being asked that question.

Christina struggled slightly in Helena’s arms, and Myka could see that it was getting difficult for Helena to hold on to the girl. Since she wasn’t still all in the moment, she didn’t think as she reached her arms out and Christina went willingly into them. Helena looked gratefully up at Myka as she tried to hide the fact that she was stretching her arm.

“Who’s this?” Jeannie asked after watching the silent exchange.

“Oh, I’m sorry, where are my manners,” Helena looked appropriately embarrassed, “This is my daughter, Christina. Christina, say hello to Myka’s father and mother.”

“Hi,” Christina waved shyly before hiding her face in Myka’s shoulder.

Myka didn’t like the look that exchanged between her parents, and she was suddenly feeling protective of the girl in her arms, “Helena, could you bring the car around? I’ll walk my dad out, but I don’t want him walking too far.”

HG sensed a shift in her girlfriend’s tone, could see the fight to hide some emotion on her face. “Alright, darling.” HG smiled, hiding her emotions far better than Myka at the moment, as she put her arms out for Christina once more.

But Myka held on to the girl for a moment longer, waiting for her too look her in the eye, “Hey, kiddo, do you think that if you held on to your mom’s hand, you could walk beside her until you got to the parking lot?” Myka was one of three people who knew that Christina was afraid of hospitals. She had gotten sick a little after turning three, her tonsils getting infected, and the fever had made her delirious as she stayed in the hospital for a couple days, she didn’t want to be left there again, “Could you be a big girl and help us out?” Myka smiled at her.

After a moment’s thought, Christina nodded, “Okay, Mom,” She leant forward and kissed Myka on the cheek before wiggling out of her grasp to the floor, reaching up to grab Helena’s hand, “Come on, Mummy, we’ve got to get the car for Myka’s Mum and Dad.” She was clearly taking her job as helper very seriously.

‘ _Thank you,_ ’ Helena mouthed to Myka before giving her a quick kiss and allowing herself to be lead down the hall by a very determined four year old.

Myka sighed before turning to her parents, who both had shocked expressions plastered on their faces.

Warren and Jeannie both opened and closed their mouths, attempting to speak, but seeming to not be able to find the words.

“I think,” Myka closed her eyes before steeling her nerves, “I think this conversation you are trying to have with me needs to take place at home, and not in the middle of the hospital.”

That seemed to snap them out of their daze for the time being as they filled out the remaining paper work, seeming to both anticipate whatever talk their daughter promised and dreading it. If the elder Berings were honest with themselves, they had no idea how to react to what had just transpired in front of them.

The only thing to keep playing over and over in their minds was the way Myka and Helena had looked to one another, communicated silently like a long married couple. How Myka had been with Christina and the way the small girl had called her  _Mom_  as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Some very seriously conflicting emotions were wreaking havoc on them as they made their way home.


	26. Support

Helena kept Christina in the bookstore portion of her girlfriend’s childhood home, which was easy enough. Christina loved the Red Couch, and this bookstore was so dissimilar to the organized store back home, that for Christina, it was a whole new adventure.

As she worried her locket and kept half her mind on keeping track of her daughter, Helena kept shooting glances toward the back door that lead to the apartment above the store.

She didn’t have to stress long, after a few minutes, Myka reemerged with a strange look on her face. It was a mixture between concern and confusion and anger and Helena had no idea how to deal with it except to move together Myka in a tight hug.

Myka had been so caught up in her own musings, she didn’t notice Helena until her head was tucked up under her chin as her arms wrapped tightly around her waist. After a moment’s shock induced hesitation, Myka returned the embrace, breathing in the scent of Helena’s shampoo as they stood there silently for a moment.

“I have a bad feeling,” Myka admitted after a moment, the sound of her voice reverberating through her chest into Helena’s ear.

HG pulled back so she could look Myka in the eye, “What do you mean?” she searched the summer green eyes she had come to know so well, fining that a storm was clouding them over.

“This thing with my Dad,” Myka clarified, “Something doesn’t feel right about it. You should have seen him, Helena,” she swallowed thickly, “He was shaking so badly, and his veins were black in his arms, and that yell he made.” Myka squeezed her eyes shut, wishing that she could stop that sound from looping over and over again in her ears. “He was obviously in so much pain. I thought… I _thought…_ ” she took in a shaky breath.

“It’s okay, my love,” Helena wiped the tears that begun to fall from Myka’s eyes with the pads of her thumbs, holding her face between her hands to keep Myka looking into her eyes, “It’s alright, take a breath.”

Myka followed her instructions, breathing through her nose and out her mouth, repeating the routine that Abigale had ingrained in her to deal with her anxiety and panic attacks.

“And then we got to the hospital,” Myka continued after a moment, “And it was like none of it even happened. He was sitting up and arguing with the doctor. And the doctor said he couldn’t find anything wrong with him, no sign of the seizure at all…” Myka shook her head, “And something about it reminded me of when I was in the hospital after getting shot, and how the doctor couldn’t understand how I was okay…”

“You think a curiosity made your father better?” Helena tilted her head.

“No,” Myka shook her head, “I think an artifact made him sick. I don’t know why… I just feel uneasy with it… how fast his seizure came on, how fast he got over it…Maybe I’m just seeing patterns And I’m not the one who gets feelings; _Pete_ gets the feelings, _I_ get the facts.”

“Myka, Myka look at me,” Helena kept her voice calm, trying to sooth Myka before she worked herself into a frenzy, “I know you like the facts and research and all that nonsense,” Myka snorted and Helena continued with a smile, “But sometimes you have to trust your instincts. And if you think something odd is happening here, then I trust you. And I’ll look into it for you, alright?”

Myka smiled sweetly at Helena for a moment, not saying anything.

“What?” Helena asked, a blush creeping over her face.

Myka shook her head, her smile growing wider, “I love you.”

Warmth spread through Helena’s chest, as it always did when Myka said those words to her, “And I love you.” She responded in earnest before kissing Myka briefly, but passionately, “And we are going to figure out what’s wrong with your father, okay? I promise.”

Myka went to check on Christina while Helena found a secluded corner of the bookstore and began making her phone calls. She watched the young girl for a moment as she longingly ran her hands over the spines of books that she could reach. Myka didn’t think it was possible for a four year old to have such a deep love of literature. Though she supposed you could blame Helena and herself for that.

With a sigh, Myka left Christina to wonder amongst the stacks as she returned to the second floor. She poked her head into Tracy’s room and found her sister fast asleep still, and Myka worried for a moment, seeing how pale she looked laying there. She carefully walked to the bed and put a hand on Tracy’s head. While it was true she did feel a little warm, Myka didn’t think she had too high of a fever that she needed to worry much.

Unable to procrastinate it any longer, Myka found her parents in the living room. Well, her father was in the living room, talking over the back of the couch to her mom, who was making tea for him.

Myka leaded awkwardly against the wall of the threshold, “I guess we should probably have that conversation now.”

Jeannie and Warren stopped talking, each turning to see their eldest daughter wringing her hands in front of her. Myka realized what she was doing and immediately straightened, putting her hands behind her back and setting her jaw, preparing for the worst that her parents had to offer her.

“She has a daughter,” so that’s how they were going to start this conversation then, pull Christina into it straight away. Myka looked to her mother to continue, biting her tongue.

“How old is she?” Jeannie looked away from her daughter, focusing instead on the drink she was making, keeping her emotions and feelings carefully hidden. After all, that trait of Myka’s was a learned skill.

“She’s four,” Myka said, “Well, four and a half, as she continues to remind me. We’ve just started her in preschool, and she’s smarter than anyone else in her class. I was afraid that she would have trouble making friends, but she’s Helena’s daughter, so of course all the kids as well as her teacher loves her. And she has this terribly wild imagination, and she loves to read and draw…” Myka realized she was rambling and stopped, she felt like one of those parents who constantly gushed over their child’s achievements.

Warren didn’t miss the way his daughter’s eyes lit up when Myka spoke about the little girl, the clear pride and adoration there, it confused him further.

“So she was, what, sixteen when she had her?” Jeannie asked, still not looking at her daughter as he carried the mug to Warren, “Who’s the girl’s father? Where’s he?”

“Seventeen,” Myka began to bristle, and worked to keep her tone even, “They were engaged to be married, but it didn’t work out and she called it off. He lives in Fairview now, and visits with Christina from time to time, but he has his own daughter on the way that he’s more concerned with.” Heat had slipped back into Myka’s tone- _that_ she couldn’t help. It happened whenever the subject of Nate came about. Not that he wasn’t changing from the boy he used to be, Myka just supposed it would take a hell of a lot more than him admitting he was wring to redeem himself in her eyes, “Helena has full custody of Christina.”

“So, she’s a single mother in college,” Jeannie nodded, talking in a tone that spoke volumes about how much Myka was about to be pissed with what she had to say, “I take it you’re helping support her and her kid?”

Myka coached her own breathing to remain calm, _in through your nose,_ “Yes, mom, I support Helena and Christina. I pay half the rent and groceries, and I watch Christina, take her to school and pick her up. I help her with homework and tuck her in at night after a story. I listen to Helena complain about her classes and customers she had to deal with. Some nights, she falls into bed exhausted and I have to take her shoes off because she’s past out before she can. Helena is working two jobs, not to mention collecting checks from several companies that she sold her inventions to. She is running her own business for god’s sake! She has been _supporting_ _herself_ since she turned sixteen. She has raised a beautiful daughter and is half way done with her Masters in engineering.”

 _Out through your mouth,_ “If Helena had her way, I wouldn’t pay for anything. But I insist on doing what I can because I figured it was about damn time she had some support from someone who loved her. I figured that it was about damn time that Christina had two parents who cared about her well-being. I figured it was _about damn time_ that those two girls were treated the way they were supposed to have been by the people who used them up before I got there. So, yes Mom, I am helping support her and her kid.”

There was silence after Myka finished her rant, and she was proud that she had kept her voice at a normal volume, that her heart wasn’t pounding out of control and her chest wasn’t heaving. In fact, she felt a hell of a lot better after getting that off her chest.

Warren Bering was taken off guard in the best possible way, he felt strangely _proud_ at his daughter, and how she was defending her two girls. It was clear to him that his daughter loved this girl and her daughter. And it didn’t matter that the person she loved was a woman, or that she had a daughter or had been engaged before. All that mattered to Warren now was that Helena was someone who deserved the amount of love that Myka clearly held for her.

Jeannie was still concerned, however, “I don’t understand, Myka. I take it you’re living with this woman and her daughter? And she has her _already_ calling you ‘mom’? Don’t you think you’re moving a bit fast with this, dear? It _is_ college. And what about Kurt? You just left him for that woman?”

Never before had Myka felt such a burning need to slap her mother, and it took a considerable amount of strength for Myka to resist that urge, “Helena. Her name is Helena, Mom. Or HG if you prefer like everyone else seems to, but stop calling her ‘ _that woman’,_ ”

Jeannie opened her mouth, but Myka was quick to cut her off, “And I didn’t leave Kurt for Helena. I left Kurt for _me._ He wasn’t good for me mom, he and I both knew at the end that we were never meant to last. And as for us moving too fast, I don’t expect you to understand that where we are _now_ has actually taken a lot longer than it should have. So I’m just going to have to put it into terms that you’ll understand. You were all for me switching schools and attending Fresno Pacific, to live in a new town where I know exactly two people, switching majors and switching my last name for that of a boy’s I had been dating for the same amount of time I have been with Helena. So tell me, Mother, is it really that you think we’re moving too fast? Is it really that she has a kid, who I adore, by the way? Is it _really_ because I’m ‘helping to support’ them? Or is it something else?”

Myka saw Jeannie’s jaw flex as her face blushed, and she knew she had gotten to the root of her mother’s prejudices, “What do you want me to say, Myka? That I’m thrilled my daughter is apparently a homosexual? That I wasn’t looking forward to the day she would get married to a _man_ and that she would one day give me grandchildren?”

“Wow, Mom,” Myka took a step back, feeling her mother’s words as a slap to the face.

“You’re being ridiculous Jeannie,” Warren finally spoke up.

“ _I_ am being ridiculous?” she demanded as she pointed to her own chest.

Myka felt a hand intertwine with her own, but she wasn’t expecting who she found to be standing next to her. Tracy was still pale, but there was a fire in her eye as she leveled a glare at their parents, giving Myka’s hand a reassuring squeeze. She had forgotten her sister was sleeping five feet from where she stood, and had probably heard most if not all of their conversation.

“Yes, _ridiculous_!” Warren barked, “You seem more concerned with the fact that our daughter marry to have kids and fill your own wants then if what she is doing is what _she_ wants! You are more concerned that she marry someone who has a dick than someone who has love for her! You are more concerned with what people will say than if our daughter is happy!”

“So now _I_ ’m the bad guy because I want my daughter to have children of her own?” Jeannie scoffed.

“Mom, just because I’m with Helena, doesn’t mean I can’t have kids!” Myka worked to keep her tone even, “There’s adoption and artificial insemination! I have Christina, who I already consider a daughter! And as you said, mother, I’m in _college_ , it isn’t as if I’d be having kids anytime soon if I was in a straight relationship!”

“What if I want a grandchild who is a part of _me_?” Jeannie demanded, “What if I would like to see your children with my eyes or your dad’s smile?”

“If it’s genetics you’re concerned with,” Tracy interjected, “I guess now’s a good a time as any to tell you both I’m pregnant.”

The way she said it was so nonchalant, Myka wasn’t sure at first if she believed her, but if you looked past the smug look on her face, her eyes echoed with fear and her hand trembled slightly in Myka’s, and she just knew Tracy was hiding her real fear over this situation behind a mask of bravado. Tracy really _was_ pregnant, and she was terrified.

It was Myka’s turn now to offer her sister support as their parent’s focus turned on her.

“I think I need something stronger than tea.” Warren commented as he set his untouched cup down on the coffee table.

“Tracy,” Jeannie gripped at the collar of her shirt.

“Mom,” Tracy responded with an eye roll, “I’m marrying David, it’s happening, we’re having a baby together. So there, that requirement has been filled: your daughter is marrying a man and having a baby that will share your genetics. So lay off Myka.”

It was surreal to Myka, seeing Tracy stand up to their mother on her behalf. Tracy and Jeannie had always been close. They had an open relationship with one another like mothers and daughters were _supposed_ to have. Something Myka had never experienced, but was always jealous of. So seeing Tracy go against her now to defend Myka… it twisted Myka’s stomach and brought tears to her eyes, but she never felt more love for her sister than in that moment.

“You met HG _once_ ,” Tracy pointed out, “And yeah, I didn’t hang out with her much more, but I saw the way that these two look at each other. _That_ is true love. It’s how I knew that it was actually a thing that existed! Myka loves HG, and HG loves Myka, and _that_ should be enough for you.”

With out letting go of Myka’s hand, Tracy turned and walked away, leaving their parents to think as they went down to the main floor of the bookstore.

Myka stopped her sister at the foot of the steps and pulled her in for a tight hug, “Thank you.” She whispered thorugh her tears.

“Don’t mention it.” Tracy smiled, trying to hide her own crying, “Seriously, don’t tell anyone ever that I said those things. I have a reputation to uphold, and I can’t have anyone thinking that I’m going soft.”

“I don’t know, you could blame it on the pregnancy hormones.” Myka smiled, letting Tracy know without saying the words that she was there for her to talk to.

Tracy rolled her eyes, but smiled, acknowledging that she knew already, “Whatever, Mykes. Now, where’s this kid I’ve heard so much about?”

Myka lead Tracy through the book shelves until they found Christina in Helena’s lap, reading a book together, and Myka tried not to smirk when she noticed it was _War of the Worlds_.

“Christina?” Myka called softly, not really wanting to interrupt the moment, but really needing to talk to Helena.

“Hey, Mom,” Christina looked up from the book to smile at her, halting when she noticed Tracy standing beside her.

Helena also looked up and smiled a greeting, but Myka could tell that there was something wrong when it didn’t reach her eyes.

“Come here, Christina,” Myka beckoned, “I want you to meet someone.”

Christina hopped off of her mother’s lap and walked to stand in front of a now kneeling Myka, “She looks like you.” The four year old pointed out.

“You think?” Myka looked back up to Tracy, “Well, she is my sister. Her name is Tracy, why don’t you say hello?”

“Hello, Tracy.” She gave her a toothy smile.

“Hello, Christina,” Tracy returned the smile.

“Christina,” Myka reclaimed the girl’s attention, “Would you go show some books to Tracy so I can talk to your mom?”

“Okay,” Christina shrugged before taking Tracy’s hand and leading her away.

“I don’t think you look alike,” Helena spoke up as soon as they were out of ear shot.

“No?” Myka chuckled.

“Nah,” she shook her head, trying to seem like she was joking, but something was clearly bothering her.

“What is it?” Myka asked, her face hiding none of her concern.

“I’ve got some information on what may be effecting your father,” Helena took a breath, “I think you should sit down for this.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, wow, I don’t even know where this chapter came from, it was supposed to be continuing the case and story line, but it just got out of hand, (SOMEBODY clearly has some unresolved issues that became apparent in their writing)  
> Secondly, I know this kinda goes against cannon, and that Myka usually has a bad relationship with her father in fics and in the actual story line, but I guess in my head, at least for this story, Warren would have identified more with Myka than Tracy since Myka was the book nerd, and that Jeannie would have identified more with Tracy than Myka. I mean, we learned that he wrote that book for her, so clearly he always loved her, he just didn’t ever know how to show it.


	27. Quoteth the Raven, "Nevermore"

The echoes of the argument taking place between Myka and her parents drifted down the stairs so that Helena could hear bits and pieces of it as she spoke on the phone. It kept distracting her from what she was trying to do. She wished she could hear the _words_ being said and not just the tones in which they were being said.

She could hear Myka’s tone rising and falling, as if she were trying hard not to start yelling about something. Jeannie’s tone soft and urging as if trying to convince Myka of something. Warren’s voice was strangely absent, but Helena couldn’t think on it as MacPherson finally answered his phone.

She had tried Claudia first, but the red head hadn’t answered her phone, and Helena figured she was probably still getting settled after their flight to New Jersey.  She left a message asking her to run her curiosity tracker, giving her information about Warren so that she could back trace it by its side effects.

Helena allowed herself to pace the floor for a few moments, staring at her phone in her hand, trying to make a decision. On the one hand, she really did _not_ want to ask James MacPherson another favor when she already owed him for saving Myka. But she had also promised Myka that she would figure out what was wrong with her father, and she knew MacPherson had connections, had a better understanding of the curiosities than they did.

Helena held her breath as she worried her locket, waiting for a voice to interrupt the dial tone, and when it did, all of her movements stopped.

“Helena,” she could hear the smile in his voice, and it made her feel sick, “It’s been too long my dear. I hear that you did quite well in Salem with my agents, but that you had a bit of outside help?”

“I work better with _my_ team,” Helena spoke through teeth, “With people I can trust.”

“Trust is a very important thing,” MacPherson allowed, “You have to know you can _trust_ the people working with you.”

“You could go a long way in earning _my_ trust if you can give me some information on a possible artifact.” She ignored the fact that James was hinting he didn’t quite trust her yet.”

“Let me guess,” She heard the sound of a protesting office chair, assuming that he sat back in his office behind his desk, “You just so happen to have stumbled upon another artifact- _coincidentally_.”

Helena ground her teeth together, “I’m not sure yet, something is definitely off here, I was hoping you could tell me if there was an artifact present or not.”

“And if I help you?” He tested, “What do I get out of it?”

Helena paused as shouting filtered through the ceiling above her, and she took a breath. She was concerned for Myka, and she just wanted her to have a good thanksgiving, and that couldn’t happen if she was fighting with her parents, or if her father ended up back in the hospital, “What do you want?”

She could only imagine the slow smile as it spread across James’ face, and it turned her stomach, “Let’s see… I think returning whatever artifact is troubling you to me is payment enough.”

“Deal,” Helena readily agreed, it wasn’t as if she had much use for an artifact that caused violent seizures, “What can you tell me about an artifact that would cause seizures, blackening veins… pain…”

“Truthfully, my dear, that sounds like it could be any number of things,” MacPherson gave an exaggerated sigh, “I’m afraid I need a bit more to go on.”

Helena got the feeling that MacPherson was messing with her, “The man effected was sitting in a room full of books when the fit happened. He was reading.”

“What was he reading?” James demanded, all smug tones gone, “Was it a journal?”

“I’m not sure, I didn’t see it,” Helena admitted, “But I can find out-,”

“Do,” he ordered, “Because if it is what I think it is, I’ve been looking for these particular artifacts for a while now, but they keep slipping through my fingers.” He grumbled.

“Artifact _s_? As in more than one?” she questioned, “What is it you think I’m dealing with here, James?”

“Yes plural,” he snapped, “It’s a bifurcated artifact, a pair that has been separated and lost. The half I think you have, what you’re describing, is Edgar Allen Poe’s journal. Whoever has read it, is in mortal danger until you can locate the pen as well and neutralize them both.”

“Why can’t I just neutralize the book?” HG questioned, glancing at the pathway to the apartment once again.

“Go ahead and try if you don’t believe me, but you need to find the pen before the book kills him.” MacPherson hung up the phone before Helena could ask how she was supposed to find it.

James was more concerned with that question himself. He had sold that artifact as a pair, and the dunce who had purchased it figured he himself would make some money by selling them separately. He quickly lost track of them as they rapidly changed hands due to the death of the owners.

He wasn’t about to let them slip through his fingers once more.

Helena looked down at her phone cursing the man before texting Claudia to do a nationwide search on possible artifact cases. She was tempted to go upstairs and search Warren’s study for the journal _now_ , but she could still hear the heated conversation and wasn’t really sure she wanted to know what was being said.

She found her daughter in the science fiction section of the store, standing on a stool and staring at the H.G. Wells books with a confused look on her face.

“What’s the matter, darling?” Helena asked as she moved to stand behind Christina, not trusting the stool she was standing on, especially not when she leaned forward on it as she was.

“H.G. Wells,” She traced the name with her finger, “Isn’t that you, Mummy?”

“That is a different H.G. Wells, darling,” Helena laughed, “Haven’t I told you this before? My great-great-great grandfather was a writer, and he wrote science fiction books, like the ones you try to get Myka to read to you. Your Grandfather and Grandmother thought it would be clever to give me the same initials as him.” HG rolled her eyes.

“Will you read me one of his books?” Christina looked up hopefully at her, the puppy dog eyes as Myka called them, “ _Please_?”

Helena felt herself cracking under the pressure, “I don’t know, which book were you thinking of?”

“This one,” She reached forward excitedly grabbing a hard covered book with a well-worn spine.

“Why this one, love?” Helena asked as she steadied her daughter. It wasn’t as if you could tell by the spine alone which book it was, so neither knew it was _War of the Worlds_ until it was in Christina’s grasp.

She shrugged, “It’s been well-loveded, lots of people must’ve read it since it looks just like Myka’s favorite books back home. So it must be a good story, right?”

Helena smiled at her daughter’s logic, “If I read this to you, do you promise not to have nightmares?” she quirked an eyebrow at her.

“I don’t have nightmares,” Christina shook her head.

Helena didn’t know if she believed that or not, but Christina clasped her hands together in a begging motion and looked up at her mother, sticking her lower lip out.

“Fine,” Helena relented, “But don’t tell Myka how easily I gave in.” she said sternly before lifting her daughter from the stool and carrying her to a chair in the corner of the store, where they sat reading together until Myka and Tracy made an appearance and Tracy whisked Christina away so Myka could speak to Helena.

Now that Myka was sitting in the chair that had been occupied by the two Wells girls, Helena didn’t know how to proceed.

“How did the conversation with your parent’s go?” She began instead.

Myka’s eyes narrowed, knowing that Helena was stalling her own news, “Fine. What did you learn about what’s hurting my dad?”

Helena bit her lip as she stopped pacing and came to a stop in front of Myka now, “I called Claudia, but she didn’t answer. So I left her a message asking her to run a curiosity search. Then I called MacPherson.”

Myka tensed at the mention of the man who saved her life. Because despite his seemingly humanitarian actions, Myka didn’t trust him, but she knew he was connected to the Warehouse and the curiosities, “What did he have to say?”

Helena took a breath before relaying all the information she had gathered from him, and by the time she was finished, Myka was sitting with a dumfounded expression on her face. Partly because when Helena got agitated, her accent slurred her words and she forgot to take pauses and slow down. But she definitely understood the gist of what she was saying.

There was another cry of pain above them and Myka was on her feet before it even registered that it was her father. Helena was on right on her heels, so they both got to Warren’s study at the same time, seeing that he was still in convulsions on his chair while Jeannie was trying to still his movements.

Helena quickly, but gently pulled Warren from Jeannie’s arms, guiding his jerking body to the ground and turning him to his side while she held on to his head.

“I’ll call the ambulance,” Jeannie sobbed as she rose on shaky legs.

“It won’t do any good, Mom,” Myka sighed as she looked through the stacks of books that were in reach of her father’s chair.

“What?” Jeannie looked to her daughter, eyes full of tears and confusion and panic, “What’s that supposed to mean? The doctor said to call him if he had another seizure!” she argued.

“The doctor can’t help,” Myka mumbled as she finally came upon a leather bound journal laying open, face down on the floor. Myka slipped off her jacket and wrapped it around the journal before lifting it, “I’ve got it!” she said over her shoulder.

“Myka, look.” Helena pulled her attention to Warren Bering’s arms.

Myka crawled on her knees to her father’s side, and stared intently at what she had earlier thought was his veins turning black. What really was ghosting over Warren’s skin were words in a heavy script, it was black ink in words she vaguely recognized but couldn’t quite understand. She looked down to the journal in her hands, finding that the handwriting matched with that of Edgar Allen Poe.

Myka and Helena met eyes over Warren’s still shaking body, exchanging a worried glance.

When the shaking finally began to subside, Helena moved so that Jeannie could sit in her place with Warren’s head in her lap. Myka’s mom looked up at the two younger women as they rose, seeming to have a silent conversation between them, “What’s going on, Myka?” She demanded, her voice wavering.

“We’re going to figure it out mom, don’t worry, just…” She looked down with a worried frown at her father pale pallor, “Keep him resting while we call some people.”

Jeannie looked like she was about to argue and Myka groaned in frustration, “Listen, Mom, what’s happening to Dad can’t be easily explained right now, but could you, I don’t know, maybe trust me for five minutes so I can help him?”

Jeannie’s mouth snapped shut, her jaw flexing visibly, but she nodded to her daughter.

Myka and Helena stepped out of the room, walking to the kitchen to put some space between Myka and her parents. Myka ran a hand roughly through her hair as she took a few deep breaths. Helena stood in front of her, holding out her arms and tilting her head, offering but not forcing her to accept. With her PTSD, Myka was some time’s fickle about her personal space. This time, Myka willingly hugged Helena, at least for a moment, allowing herself to be comforted as she ran through the list of things in her head that she had to do.

“Okay,” Myka pulled back, rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hands before pulling out her wallet, the now well-worn card she kept in there, “I’ll call Dr. Calder, you see if you can get a hold of Claudia now, it’s been a few hours, I’m surprised she hasn’t called you back already.”

Myka was torn between being angry with the techie and worried for her. Claudia always answered her phone, or called back right away. So why wasn’t she doing so now? But Myka couldn’t afford to think that way, she could only be worried about one person at a time, and right now, even if something was wrong with Claudia, there wasn’t much to do for her.

So she focused instead on putting in the number of Vanessa Calder. She hadn’t spoken to the doctor since her “major depressive episode”, as Abigale called it, but she knew her therapist was keeping her in the loop on how Myka was coping.

“Calder,” the doctor answered briskly.

“Dr. Calder? It’s Myka.” Myka leaned her elbows on the counter so she could hold her head in her hands but keep herself standing, her migraines were coming back with a vengeance, and she wished she had listened to Helena when she told her to pack her pain killers.

“Myka? What’s wrong?” She asked quickly, jumping to the worst possible conclusion. Understandably so, seeing as the last time Myka had called her personally, she had been standing at the railing of a bridge.

“I’m fine,” Myka was quick to assure her, “It’s not me I’m worried about, it’s my Dad. He’s been effected by a curiosity.”

“Do you know which one?” Dr. Calder asked, her voice sounding strange.

“Edgar Allen Poe’s journal?” Myka offered, still unsure that it was the cause, “He’s having seizures, and there are these words that appear on his skin… I don’t know what to do or how to help him.” She admitted in a low tone, not wanting her mother to overhear her.

“Edgar Allen…” Dr. Calder trailed off, “Are you sure?”

“Um,” Myka glanced down at the journal, “Yeah, I’m pretty sure.”

“That’s not… How could it…” Vanessa was having trouble concentrating it seemed, “Where is it you said you were?”

“My parent’s bookstore?” Myka was feeling more confused by the minute, “In Colorado Springs.” She clarified.

“Okay…” there was silence for a moment on the other end of the phone, “Okay, I should be there in about two hours. Until I get there, it is of vital importance that your father hold on to who he is.”

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?” Myka demanded, “What’s happening to my dad?”

“This artifact is broken, Myka.” Dr. Calder explained quickly as she searched her room for her go bag, “It is a set, the journal and the pen. When they aren’t together… well, they get angry. The journal on its own, it forces its reader into the mind of Edgar Allen Poe, and he wasn’t exactly the most mentally stable man alive. The problem is that the human mind cannot accommodate two distinct… let’s call them souls, at once. It’s why you’re seeing seizures in your father. They’ll get more violent until we bring the pen and the journal back together and neutralize them.”

“So how do I keep my father himself?” Myka asked, feeling her heart beat in her ears.

“Keep the things he cares most about around him,” Dr. Calder offered, “He ones a bookstore, yes? He loves books, read him the ones that mean the most to him. I’ll be bringing something that should slow down the process until you can get a hold of the pen. I’ve got to go Myka, I’ll see you soon.”

The line went dead in Myka’s hand so she set her cell phone on the counter and stared at it for a moment, pulling in one shaky breath after another.

Helena had finally gotten a hold of Claudia. Apparently, Steve and Claudia had stopped at Steve’s old high school to visit with a teacher Steve had been close with and they came into a bit of trouble when a kid was opening his locker and got hit in the face with a blast of fire. It had piqued the techie’s interest, as well as giving her flash backs to her own experience with boys catching on fire. When the EMT’s had whisked the kid away, a sheet of paper had fallen from his hand that had the word _fire_ scrawled across it.

“That’s not the only weirdness going on around here,” Claudia went on ranting, ignoring Helena’s attempts to get her attention, “Apparently a display case was broken into in the English department, and you wouldn’t believe what the guy stole, so stupid-,”

“Claudia!” Helena finally snapped, “I am more than willing to listen to your wondrous adventures in a New Jersey high school _later_. For now I need you to open up your curiosity finder and run a nationwide search, but could you search instead for specific concurrent events?”

“Whenever something happens, why is it always you two?” Claudia asked, but HG could hear her typing on her computer, “Why can’t _I_ ever stumble across a curiosity without looking for one?”

“I assure you, Claudia,” HG grumbled, “If I could give you this apparent curse, I would.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay give me the details, but I’m warning you that it might take a few hours to run through everything.” There was the sound of Claudia popping several joints, loud enough that HG pulled her ear away from the phone in disgust.

“Alright, I already have and know what’s causing _these_ symptoms, I’m looking for a pattern of other oddities occurring at or around the same time. The same thing every time, got it?” Helena spoke slowly so that Claudia would hear every word.

“Geesh, this is a weird one, huh?”

“You have no idea, alright, so there’s seizures, veins turning black, or words appearing and disappearing on the skin, but when the patients are checked out, the doctors find nothing wrong with them. And,” Helena looked over her shoulder at Myka, still on the phone with Dr. Calder, before lowering her voice, “I’m guessing that after a few of these attacks the victims die.”

“Got it,” the sound of her madly typing away on the keys filled the brief silence, “Should I be worried about you and Mykes getting hurt? I don’t think I can handle you guys having any more near death experiences.”

“It’s not us, Claud,” HG assured her young friend, “Its Myka’s dad, though, so _please,_ Claudia, keep an eye on your computer and keep your phone on.”

“You got it dude bro.” Claudia chimed before disconnecting the call.

After they ended their separate conversations, there was a few moments when they had one of their own, catching each other up before they lapsed into a tension filled silence.

“Myka,” Helena’s tone shifted, just barely, but Myka noticed enough as she looked up at her girlfriend once more, “About that conversation you had with your parents…”

Myka’s eyes flashed with an indescribable emotion, her eyes widening briefly before she reigned in her feelings, “How much did you hear?”

“None,” Helena shrugged one of her shoulders, “Well, I couldn’t hear the words anyway, but I could hear the yelling. I take it they aren’t too happy with our relationship then…”

She saw Myka’s jaw flare before she forced her teeth apart to speak, “My mom hasn’t come around to the idea yet, but I left Dad to talk to her when Tracy and I came back down stairs.”

Helena nodded, looking down at the top of her boots, “I don’t want to cause problems between you and your family, I know that you have a shaky relationship with them as it is, and I couldn’t stand it if it was my fault that you guys start fighting again.”

“Helena, Helena look at me,” Myka tilted her chin up when she didn’t comply, and the look in Helena’s eyes nearly broke her heart, and she immediately pulled her in for a hug, “You listen to me, Helena Wells, I _love_ you. That’s all that matters, not what anyone else says, not their opinion on it. All that matters is you and me.”

Helena nodded into Myka’s chest as she clung to her, ashamed that she was being so emotional right now, but then again, Myka always _did_ have a way of breaking her walls down, leaving her exposed.

Lucky she was there to protect her once she _was_ exposed.

“I may be crying right now,” Helena admitted into Myka’s shirt, “But, please don’t be angry with me if I have a few choice words for anyone who tries to make you feel bad for being with me.”

Myka chuckled, the sound reverberating through Helena’s ear, “I would expect nothing less from you.”

With that, they sat on the couch, exhausted, and the waiting game began.


	28. Long Intervals of Horrible Sanity

“How did you do it?”

It took a moment for Helena to realize that those words were directed at her, and she looked up to the whiskey colored eyes staring inquisitively at her, “I beg your pardon?”

Tracy looked over to where her sister was playing with the little girl, some imaginary game that she didn’t understand the premise of the game, but it seemed to involve an awful amount of running around chasing imaginary people, sword fighting and saving two stuffed animals. They had gone to the park when it became obvious the four year old was quickly going stir crazy.

“How did you have a kid at sixteen?” Tracy clarified, “”How did you raise her on your own?”

Helena quirked an eyebrow at the younger woman, “It was my understanding that you and the father planned to raise your child together?”

“We did,” Tracy assured her, “We do, but that’s my point, H, I have David, and I know that he’ll help me with whatever I need, that he’ll be there for me and this baby. He has a secure job, he’s almost done with his degree. There is essentially nothing for me to worry about. And yet I am terrified. Absolutely _terrified_. So how did you do it, because I am freaking out here.”

Helena smiled wistfully, gaining a faraway look in her eye as she turned back to watch Myka scoop Christina up and spin her in circles, a peel of laughter echoing around them, “Honestly, Tracy, I have no idea how I did it, how I got this far. I know _now_ that if it weren’t for the people around me, my support system, if you will, I wouldn’t be able to do it. I didn’t have Christina’s father, that’s true. But I had my older brother who helped me, and my best friend to make sure I was alright.

“Then when I moved to the states, I had Myka. And she has made all the difference.” Helena thought quietly for a moment, “Do you love him? This David fellow?”

Tracy bit the inside of her cheek as she thought, “It’s complicated. I mean, how do you know if you love someone you’ve only known for four months?”

“It always is complicated,” Helena chuckled, “I mean, your sister and I skirted around each other, we didn’t even _speak_ for nearly two years. And after that, it took us months to even admit to ourselves that we were in love. So I can understand how it might feel complicated, even more so now that you have a baby on the way. So let’s try a different question, do you trust him?”

“Yes,” Tracy nodded, not having to think about it.

“See? That’s more than I could say for Nate.” Helena allowed with a small smile, “Do you think he would make a good father, whether you and he stay together or not?”

Tracy nodded, “I do, he would make a great dad.”

“So perhaps, you and he could, I don’t know, _date_ before you choose to marry him?” Helena said with a laugh that Tracy echoed, “I know it seems a bit backwards at this moment, but you need to know that you aren’t just _you_ anymore. You’re you and this baby. You have to do what’s right for the both of you. Whether that means you marry David, or you just stay friends. You care about him, right?”

“So much it scares me,” Tracy admitted in a whisper, “I mean, I’ve had boyfriends before, but he’s different. He isn’t even the type I usually go after, I don’t know what happened. And now, I don’t think I can see my life _without_ him in it.”

“Right then,” HG nodded, “So be with him. Don’t worry, you’ve got a bigger support system than you think, after all. You’ve got me, and your sister, and I’m sure Pete will have a few choice words for this David fellow when they finally meet.” Tracy laughed, the tears that had been sitting on the brim of her eyelids finally fading the longer she spoke to the woman beside her, “So don’t stress about it, not when there is nothing yet to stress about.”

“Thanks, H.” Tracy smiled at her.

“Because my previous nickname wasn’t short enough?” HG laughed before wrapping an arm around Tracy so the girl could lay her head on HG’s shoulder as they continued to watch Myka wear herself and Christina out.

“I always thought she’d make a great mom, ya know?” Tracy spoke softly after a moment, “I mean, we didn’t exactly get along growing up, but she was always there when I needed her.”

Helena smiled, “She already makes a great mom.”

Helena could see that Myka was stressed over her father and finding Edgar Allen Poe’s pen, and stressed over her mother’s words, so it was with that mindset, as well as Christina’s loud sigh and claim of being bored, that drove them to the park. Now there was laughter instead of tears in Myka’s green eyes.

Myka had been smitten with Christina from the moment they met, and it often left Helena wondering why she had been so afraid of telling Myka of the girl’s existence. Especially when some days Christina was the only one Myka had the strength to smile for.

Helena sighed heavily as she looked down to her watch, their time at the park was up. She and Tracy rose from the bench and beckoned to Myka and Christina.

It was quiet in the 4runner as they drove to the airport, aside from the radio playing softly in the background and Cristina whispering to her “Aunt Tracy” that she was hungry.

Tracy took Christina to the McDonalds in the airport while Helena and Myka waited for Dr. Calder to get her baggage.

The drive _back_ to the bookstore was even more tension filled, and when Myka nearly ran a red light, Helena found herself wishing she had insisted she drive.

“How bad is he?” Vanessa asked as they went up the stairway in a single file line lead by Myka.

“He had a second seizure, but I think my mom has been keeping him off his feet since we’ve been gone.” Myka took them down to the study, finding Jeannie sitting on an ottoman reading to a sleeping Warren.

Vanessa rushed to his side with her black medical bag.

“Who are you?” Jeannie asked, staring at the older blonde woman.

“This is the doctor I was telling you about, Mom,” Myka patted her shoulder reassuringly, “She’s going to help us help dad.”

Dr. Calder sighed heavily before pulling what appeared to be a sleeping mask from her bag and placing it over Warren’s eyes, “This isn’t a permanent solution, but it’ll help.” She told Myka before looking to Jeannie, “Don’t take this mask off, I have to speak with your daughter in the other room, alright?”

“Tracy, could you take Christina down stairs?” Helena passed her daughter over with a pleading smile.

Tracy accepted with a nod, “Come on, kiddo, let’s go read all of the books your Mom said was off limits.”

They shared a conspiratorial grin that had both Myka and Helena rolling their eyes as they watched them leave down the stairs. Dr. Calder took them to the next room over, the kitchen, and began speaking in a low tone.

“Okay, that’s Joseph Stalin’s Sleeping Mask,” she informed them, “It should keep him asleep with the worst of the seizures away, but I recommend your mother continue to read to him because it’ll only slow the Journal’s progress. We have to get the pen before someone uses it again.”

“Wait, wait,” Myka pulled the doctor up short, “You used a curiosity on my father? What are the side effects?” She demanded, knowing firsthand the drawbacks.

“Nothing so drastic as developing PTSD, Myka,” Dr. Calder was quick to reassure her, “He’ll stay asleep until we take the mask off, and he’ll have a craving for vodka for a while, but that’s it. He won’t get the urge to convert to communism I promise. Where’s the journal?”

“On the counter,” Myka pointed behind the doctor, “How do we find the pen?”

“Here’s the thing,” Dr. Calder said as she put on a pair of purple gloves, lifting the journal and studying it carefully without opening it, “I collected this artifact when I was an agent. My partner and I did, but only after it caused the death of several people. It was one of my first snags, and we got it by luck Hugo and I were in the right places at the right time, each sent somewhere else to investigate the strange occurrences. It turned out to be the pen and the journal, acting up after having been separated.”

“So how did it get out of the Warehouse?” Myka demanded in a harsh whisper, “If you had already collected them, how did one end up in my father’s bookstore killing him?”

“That is the question that is bothering me…” Dr. Calder admitted, becoming lost in her own thoughts for a moment.

“The pen, doctor?” Helena cut into her silent musings before her girlfriend could snap, “How do we find the pen? What does it even do?”

“It bends to the will of its wielder,” Vanessa said cryptically.

Myka gave Helena a long suffering look, “Doctor, could you maybe be a little more clear on what it is we should be looking for?”

“Right,” Dr. Calder shook her head, as if physically shaking off the thoughts distracting her, “The person who is using the pen will also slowly lose themselves to it, in a far more dangerous manner. All the person has to do is _use_ the pen, write what they want to happen, and have it read by the target.”

Helena had a strange look on her face, Myka had seen it before, when her girlfriend was running late to class or work and she couldn’t remember where she put the keys. There was something there, at the back of her mind that she could seem to quite pull to the forefront.

But before Myka could pull it out of her, there was a shout for help from the study echoed by another cry of pain they were becoming all too familiar with. They rushed to the source of the sound, finding Jeannie holding Warren as he convulsed on the floor, the sleeping mask a few feet from them.

“What happened?” Myka asked as she went to her mother’s side, helping keep her father from hurting himself, staring in horror at the words that slid over his skin, darker than she remembered them being, “I thought you said the mask would help?” Myka looked up at the doctor.

Vanessa frowned as she retrieved the sleeping mask, “It is supposed to. Mrs. Bering, did you remove the mask?”

“N-no,” Jeannie sniffled as she shook her head, “But I left him for a moment, just a moment to get a different book, and when I came back, it was off. I think he may have woken up and done it himself.”

“The seizures are getting worse,” Myka pointed out, staring at the doctor, begging with her eyes for her help.

“You two need to find this artifact and bring it back here before whoever has it uses it again, otherwise this is going to keep happening.” Vanessa sighed as Warren quieted, seeming to fall into his exhaustion.

They were interrupted by the sound of Helena’s phone ringing. The Brit looked at the caller ID before stepping out of the room, where the three women were trying to get Warren to lay in a comfortable and safe position while putting the mask back over his eyes.

“Please tell me you’ve got something, Claudia,” Helena begged, “We’re running out of time here.”

“Oh I’ve got something alright,” The redhead sounded flustered, “I ran the program, and I did find a pattern with what you’re talking about. By a completely _random_ coincadink, it would seem that the other curiosity you are looking for is here.”

“Here?” Helena pulled back, “Here where?”

“Jersey,” Claudia’s speech became more hurried as she went on, “More specifically, here in the school.”

“The school?” Helena made a face, though there was no one around to see it, “What are you doing back at the school?”

“Something wasn’t sitting right with me, something was _off_ about that fire earlier, but I didn’t know what, so when Steve went to go see his old English teacher again, I tagged along. Only when we got there, there was a problem.”

“Is there a point to this story, Claud?” Helena pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger, “Because I don’t know how much more of this Myka’s dad can take.”

“The _point_ , HG, is that when we got to his teacher’s classroom, he was nowhere to be seen,” Claudia’s voice rose in pitch, “No big deal right? We turn around to leave, and we here knocking on the wall. From the inside. Of a _brick_ wall. And what sounds like someone shouting for help. So Steve goes all macho guy on it with a fire extinguisher and _we pull his English teacher out of the fracking wall_!”

“What?” Helena shook her head, “What does this have to do with the journal or the pen?”

“The pen!” Claudia suddenly shouted, “Why didn’t you say it was a pen! Of course it’s the pen!”

“Claudia, what is it?” Helena was quickly growing impatient.

“Jinksy’s English teacher, it was his room that had the display case that was ransacked. Whoever broke into it stole a quill pen that was in there.” She could hear the smile in the techie’s voice.

“Edgar Allen Poe’s quill pen?” Helena’s face paled.

“Yeah!” Claudia exclaimed, “And when I checked the computer, the patterns match up. Weird weirdness involving Edgar Allen Poe poems and someone elsewhere in the country dying of seizures that they can’t figure out the cause for.”

“Oh my god, Claudia, I could kiss you!” Helena felt the first beginnings of hope.

“I’m totally down, but I don’t think Myka would like that too much.” Claudia chuckled.

“Listen, I need you to find that pen and get it to Colorado Springs as quickly as you can.” Helena spoke quickly now, “We need to reunite the two curiosities before anyone else gets hurt.”

“We’re really gonna rack up some frequent flier miles, aren’t we?” Claudia sighed heavily, “And I don’t know who has it, but don’t worry, Jinks and I are on the case. I’ll call you when I find something. Claud out!”

Helena sent a quick prayer to whoever was listening that they would find the pen soon, before anyone else got hurt.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind I have not gone back and watched this episode, “Nevermore,” S1Ep11, and it being first season means I haven’t seen it since last April, so the artifact’s usage and effects may be a little off from Canon, but this is how I needed them to work for the story line. (It’s not as if Canon doesn’t have its own continuity errors.)


	29. Some Strangeness

“Let’s go talk to your English teacher,” Claudia clapped Steve on the shoulder, who had been standing by, trying to keep up with the conversation, but sometimes, Claudia and HG just spoke too fast for anyone to follow, sometimes they were in their own little world the other three in the group had yet to understand.

“Did you even ask her how Myka was?” Steve asked, working to keep up with his energizer bunny of a friend.

Claudia made a face at him, “I’m sure she’s fine. If she wasn’t, HG would have told us, right?”

Steve rolled his eyes at his naive friend, and he wondered if Claudia could appreciate just how difficult this trip must be for their friend. After all, he was the only one who had ever had to come out to their parents. He knew how nerve wracking it could be, and he knew the repercussions that could come from it. It had nearly torn him from his family, if it weren’t for Olivia…

Steve pulled himself from this line of quickly as soon as his sister’s name crossed his line of consciousness. He had to be careful when and where he thought of her. Sometimes it brought a fond smile, sometimes it brought tears.

These high school halls had seen enough of Steven Jinks’ tears.

They walked back into Mr. Ives’ class room, finding the man sitting on the ground, still covered in dry wall and brick dust, staring dumfounded at the whole in the wall his former student had pried him from.

“Mr. Ives?” Steve called softly, not wanting to startle the man.

“Do you think I should be in a hospital?” He asked in a flat tone without looking up at them, “Or maybe a sanitarium somewhere, because surely, the wall did not just open up and suck me in. This has to be a psychotic break, right? This can’t be real?” Now he looked up at him, looking so lost and hoping Mr. Jinks and his eccentric friend had the answers he so desperately needed.

Steve frowned as he knelt beside the older man, “I wish I could explain this to you in a way that made any sense at all, Mr. Ives. Hell, after nine months of being a part of some of the most… _insane_ parts of history and physics, I don’t understand it all myself. What I do understand is that we need to find the person who did this to you before anyone else gets hurt.”

Steve really did want to help his former teacher, whose classroom had been a safe haven from the battle ground that existed just outside. While Steve had been accepted as he was by the handful of people he called friend, the rest of the school was a different story, and Mr. Ives was kind in allowing Steve to hide out in his class when things got bad for him.

He was infinitely glad once more that he wasn’t the same person he was in high school.

Mr. Ives nodded before allowing himself to be lead to his desk chair, “I was just talking to him, trying to help him…”

“Who?” Claudia asked, her voice soothing, but insistent, “Who were you trying to help?”

“I knew it was him who stole the pen… but it was just a pen, right?” Mr. Ives went on talking, close to that psychotic break he mentioned earlier, “I mean sure it was Edgar Allen Poe’s pen, and it cost this department an arm and a leg to get, but it was just a quill pen! Expensive, but harmless!”

“Mr. Ives,” Steve cut into his ranting, “Mr. Ives… Neil!” Steve slapped him across the face.

That seemed to bring the teacher back around as be brought a hand to his reddening cheek, giving Steve an indignant look, but sanity had returned to his eyes… at least for the time being.

“Who stole the pen, Mr. Ives?” Steve spoke each word slowly, carefully, his eyes icy as they watched the teacher’s.

“I only had a suspicion, you have to understand. I only thought it was him because I had seen him eyeing it earlier when I was speaking with him. But when I asked him about it, he just gave me this… awful look and handed me a sheet of paper that read _Wall_.” A shutter went through the traumatized man, “Next thing I know, I’m trapped in that damned wall with no way out and a diminishing oxygen supply.”

“A name, Mr. Ives,” Steve pushed, “I need a name, before he hurts someone, sir.”

“Bo-Bobby,” the teacher licked his lips as he tried to still his shaking hands, “Bobby Buseki. He’s a good kid, but he’s picked on by the others. I was only trying to help him.”

“Come on, Claud,” Steve turned to his friend, “We’ve gotta find this Bobby Buseki.”

“Hold up,” Claudia pulled her arm from his grasp, kneeling down to Mr. Ives’ side as Steve had been earlier, “You said he wrote down a word, and you read it before the… before you were trapped.”

“Yeah…” Mr. Ives’ eyes were haunted, and Claudia could see the memory working to pull him under, she had seen the look so often over the past months when looking at Myka.

“And you said Bobby is bullied,” Claudia continued, wanting to hurry while she still had him in the present, “Is one of the bully’s named Greg? Greg Permut?”

“Yes,” Mr. Ives’ eyebrows scrunched down in a mixture of concern and anger, “Greg was the one who was tormenting him the most lately. Bobby has a crush on Greg’s on again off again girlfriend, Tamara. She’s who he and I spoke about before the pen was stolen.”

Claudia thanked him before moving to one of the desks in the classroom, pulling her laptop out of her bag, “Jinksy, I think you should probably go get the nurse or something for teach. I’m gonna look up these kids so we can get a picture.”

Steve hesitated a moment, torn between staying with his friend and finding help for his teacher. And impatient hand wave from Claudia made the decision for him, “Okay, but _stay put_ until I get back.” He pointed a finger at Claudia.

“Yeah, yeah,” Claudia rolled her eyes without bothering to look up from her computer screen.

Steve left at a pace just short of a jog, not that Claudia noticed, her mind was busy putting things together and hacking into the school’s strangely sophisticated security system. She wasn’t as good at figuring out the puzzles of the cases they worked, not like HG or Myka, or hell even Pete was better at it than she was most days. That was okay with Claudia, though. She had accepted her role as resident tech genius.

Some genius she was, though. As soon as a realization hit, nearly knocking her out of the chair, Claudia considered herself anything _but_. She had binged watched enough Criminal Minds to see that Bobby was escalating, and quickly. She knew, she just _knew_ that the next person he was going to go after was this Tamara girl.

She quickly pulled up all the Tamara’s in the school, then limited it to the eleventh graders, finally finding Tamara Duarte’s class schedule.

The final bell rang and Claudia was on her feet, running to find the girl before Bobby got to her.

Murphy’s Law: whatever can go wrong, will.

Claudia should have remembered that as her convers were smacking against the scuffed linoleum floor, rushing past the thinning students and slamming locker doors, people giving her strange looks, but thankfully stepping out of her way.

The student’s finally thinned out, and she was alone, her breathing echoing throughout the now cavernous opening. She looked this way and that, having lost her way in the school, cursing herself and wishing Steve had been there to guide her.

She figured she had to be on the second floor to find Tamara’s last class, and though she could see a second story walk way in front of her, she couldn’t see the stairs that lead to it. What she could see, however, was a floppy haired kid, no older than sixteen, cornering a girl the same age. She called out as he held up a piece of paper and spoke lowly to her, but it was too late. She could _see_ their body language shift, and the girl leant forward, pressing her lips softly to his.

Claudia looked around frantically for a way to get to them, bu it was too late. Though it registered in Bobby Buseki’s brain a second late, Claudia’s outburst had not gone unheard, and now, hand in hand, what had to be the world’s craziest looking couple, stared down at her from the railing of the walk way.

“Bobby,” Claudia called up to him, her voice wavering slightly, “Look, kid… you’ve got to stop… just… just give me the pen, and we can all go back to normal.”

He gave her a crazed smile before Claudia was suddenly on her back, held by straps she couldn’t remember being there before. And she struggled uselessly against them.

‘ _But I hadn’t read anything he wrote!’_ Claudia complained to the universe at large, but her best guess was that the boy and the pen were growing stronger.

“I don’t want it all to go back to _normal,_ ” Bobby’s voice dripped with venom, sounding nothing like that of a sixteen year old boy. He didn’t even _look_ like a sixteen year old boy anymore, the pale skin, bruised eyelids and feral smile making him an ageless terror to the trapped redhead.

Claudia continued to struggle, but quickly fell pressed herself as tightly as she could to the ground when the sound of cutting air reached her, accompanied by a giant blade on a pendulum that swung over her, missing her torso my mere inches.

“Bobby!” Claudia’s voice was bursting with the terror she felt, thrashing against her restraints once more, “Bobby, don’t do this!”

She fell back as the pendulum came on its backwards swing, ever so closer to her now, and Bobby and Tamara looked on with identical grins of sick pleasure. The blade passed over again and Claudia’s scream tapered off with a sob as she tried to suck in her gut further.

Steve tackled the students, not understanding what was happening to Claudia down below, but knowing that Bobby was the cause. Before Bobby had a chance to effect Steve with the powers of the quill pen, his head was met with a swift but severe punch courtesy of his tackler.

The pen was removed from the unconscious boy’s clutched fist, but that didn’t stop the horror happening down below and Claudia called out for help once more, the fear in her voice a tangible thing.

Steve glanced down in time to see the pendulum swing past his best friend once more, “Please, _help me!_ ” she cried out.

Without a second thought, Steve vaulted over the railing, landing hard on his ankle, but ignoring the pain as he slid over to his best friend, pulling uselessly at the restraints.

“My bag!” Claudia sobbed, gesturing with her head to where her bag lay ten feet away, “Neutralize the pen!”

Steve dumped the bag, clumsily throwing things aside as he looked for one of the silver bags in a panic. This time when Claudia cried out, there was real pain, and not just the fear of it. Steve didn’t risk a look behind him to check on her, he grabbed the foil bag and dropped the pen in, turning his face away from the violent blue sparks that erupted from it.

Only then did Steve allow himself to go to his friend, now free of the black belts holding her down, but in a new kind of danger as he saw a line of blood on her torso where the blade had made contact.

He lifted her shirt, and Claudia whimpered in pain as she bit her lips and screwed her tear filled eyes shut. It was a deep cut, however not immediately life threatening… at least, not if he got her to a hospital quickly.

Steve took off his shirt and pressed it into Claudia’s stomach, putting her hands over it, “Hold this down, okay? I need to get you to the hospital, but it would be quicker if I just drove us there.”

Claudia nodded, “My bag… you need to get my bag… and the pen, don’t forget the pen.”

“Will you ever stop bossing me around?” Steve rolled his eyes but moved to shove Claudia’s things back into her messenger bag regardless.

“This is going to probably hurt,” he warned her before scooping her up in his arms. He cried out in pain under her wait and nearly went down to his knees, now that his adrenaline was fading he began to notice the pain in his left ankle.

He ground his teeth though, and walked as best he could under the added weight of Claudia and her messenger bag- which had to weigh more than she did. He lay her on her back in the back of his parent’s car before limping around to the driver’s side.

Nearly every traffic law in the state of New Jersey was broken driving to the hospital, including parking in a handicap space once they arrived. But they were not stopped by any police officers, a small miracle in itself, not that Steve would have pulled over had there been flashing red and blue lights in his rearview mirror.

“Come on,” Steve grunted as he moved to cradle Claudia to his chest once more, his worry increasing as her eyes began to get glassy and her face paled. His shirt was nearly soaked in blood now.

Nurses moved to intercept Steve as he tripped into the ER, finally allowing himself to fall to his knees. He didn’t want to let go of her at first, rationality leaving him, but he recognized people trying to help them and he let go.

“What happened?” they were asking him, but he supposed he was going into his own kind of shock at seeing his best friend close her eyes as they lifted her to a gurney. Steve hated hospitals. More than almost anything else, he hated _this_ hospital. It was where they took Olivia… it’s where she died… Suddenly Steve’s breathing spiked and he began to grow dizzy, collapsing to the ground on his face.

He came to less than five minutes later, his mind finally ready to cope with what was happening now. He moved to sit up but was bet with a latex gloved hand to his chest, “Whoa, there sir, take it easy.”

“Where is she?” Steve cleared his throat, “Where’s Claudia?”

“The woman you brought in?” the doctor asked as he went on poking and prodding Steve in different places, and Steve nodded in response, “Is she your girlfriend?”

“No,” Steve shook his head, “She’s my sister.” He added without thinking.

“What happened?” the doctor continued his questioning as well as his exam.

Steve’s mind reeled for an excuse. What was their go to explanation again? “Mugging… some guys tried to take her bag… she fought back.” Steve gave a scoff to make the story more believe able, “They had a knife… is my sister okay?”

“You’re sister is fine,” a nurse walked to the doctors side, “She’s getting stitches now, though she isn’t awake, yet. Here’s the thing, Mr. Jinks.” The nurse gave him a funny look, “When we pulled the ID’s off of you two, hers read Claudia _Donavan_ , not Jinks. Who is she really?”

“She’s my adopted sister, okay?” Steve’s face reddened as his head became clearer, “She was a foster kid, and my parents took her in after my other sister died.”

The nurse gave him an odd look, then looked down to his arm, then back at his face, recognition dawning there. It had been over five years since she had seen him last, he had been just a boy then, but she recognized the words on his arm, “Steven Jinks… your sister… Olivia, right?”

Steve squinted his eyes at her, confusion evident, “Yeah.”

The nurse nodded, “I was the nurse… I was there when… I gave you that letter from her.” She pointed to Steve’s forearm.

Steve glance down, then back to her face, a sad realization in his eyes at the grim reminder of that day, “I’m sorry, I don’t exactly remember much from that day…”

“That’s alright,” the nurse waved her hand, she was honestly still glad to see that the boy had grown up. The look that had been in his eye after his sister died had haunted the nurse for the last five years, and she often wondered what became of him.

“Gah!” Steve suddenly cried out in pain as the doctor reached his ankle.

The doctor in turn quirked an eyebrow at him, “What happened to your ankle?”

“I fell.” Something in Steve’s tone sounded like a challenge and the doctor smiled.

“Right, okay either I can cut the pants, or you can take them off, but I need to examine you.” He gave Steve a serious look.

“You could at least buy me dinner first,” Steve mumbled as he began to unbutton his pants and the doctor carefully removed Steve’s shoes.

The doctor chuckled, and Steve caught the slight blush wash over the other man’s features. That’s when he took the time to actually _look_ at the man treating him, he had been to consumed with worry for Claudia to really notice him before. He was young, had to be in the first year of his residency still, and attractive. He looked like he should be playing a doctor on television, not be a real one in a hospital in Jersey.

 _Or playing doctor with me,_ Steve smirked at his own thoughts and had to work to hide them as he slid his jeans off. It didn’t help when the doctor had to assist getting the one pant leg over Steve’s now swollen ankle.

Meanwhile the nurse stood by, ready to assist, but more than content to watch with a half-smile at the scene unfolding before her.

The pain helped focus Jinks as the doctor turned his ankle with a contemplative look on his face, “I don’t think it’s broken, just badly sprained. I can give you some painkillers, but you’re just going to have to rest it. Keep it elevated with ice on for twenty minutes, off for forty. And as long as you promise not to do anything strenuous, I won’t put a brace on you, think you can behave.”

Steve gave the doctor a crooked grin, “I’ve never been very good at behaving, but for you I think I will try my hardest.”

The doctor’s blush deepened as cleared his throat as he began to wrap Steve’s ankle with an ace bandage, and the nurse had to bite her cheek to keep herself from laughing.

Steve knew now was not the best time to be flirting, but the exhaustion from the day was making him giddy, as well as the relief that Claudia was going to be okay. Besides, when was the next time a young attractive doctor would be treating him?

“How old are you?” Steve asked as the doctor struggled to keep himself focused on finding his script pad and what he was trying to prescribe his patient, “I mean, no offense, Doc, but you don’t exactly look like the doctors I usually see. Not that I’m complaining.”

His lip twitched as he fought a smile, “I’m 24. Seven years of all work and no play got me here a little faster than my peers.”

“I’m sure you get to catch up on your play _now_ though, right,” Steve’s smile made the question seem more innocent than it sounded in its recipient’s ears, “Doctor….?”

“Grant,” The doctor cleared his throat once more when he nearly choked on his own name, “Jason Grant.”

Steve smiled, but his flirting was cut short when another nurse arrived, “I’m sorry, but the girl’s awake and asking for your patient.”

“Kathy, could you bring Mr. Jinks here some crutches so he can go check in on his sister?” Grant was working hard on bringing back his mask of professionalism, but it was difficult when the nearly naked man lying in front of him kept shooting him those hundred watt smiles.

“Right away,” the first nurse was glad for an excuse to leave the suddenly tension filled area.

Once they were alone, Grant helped Steve sit up in his bed, “Do you think I could get my pants back?”

“I think it might hurt some getting them back on.” Grant warned.

Steve simply shrugged, “I’d like to have _some_ dignity left. I can already hear my sister cracking jokes about me being shirtless.”

Grant’s eyes were drawn back to Steve’s sculpted form once more at his mention of being shirtless. He shook his head as he grabbed the jeans from where he dropped them on the floor, “I can get you some scrubs if you like.” He scratched the back of his neck as he handed over what was left of Steve’s clothing.

“That’s alright,” Steve had a softer smile now, “Her poking fun at me is how I’ll know she’s okay.”

He got the first leg through alright, but he needed Grant’s help once again for the second leg, and Steve had to recite the codified law book to keep his mind too busy to conjure up all sorts of fantasies when the doctor knelt in front of him.

His pants were buttoned and he had a shoe on his one good foot by the time Kathy returned with crutches and a sly smile, “Here you go, Steven.”

Steve smiled his thank you as he rose, balancing on one leg as he adjusted himself to the crutches.

Dr. Grant scribbled something on his script pad, tearing the top sheet off and handing it to Steve, “I think that’ll be all. Kathy will take you to your sister. Take care, Steven.” He said quickly, walking away before Steve had a chance to glance down at the sheet of paper in his hand.

It was a prescription for painkillers, as promised, but on the blank side of the paper, was scribbled in _slightly_ more legible hand writing, _Jason Grant_ , followed by a ten digit number. Steve’s smile was genuine now, and his face flushed and Kathy had to resist the urge to say _awwww._

Steve pocketed the sheet before hobbling after Kathy to a curtained off area of the ER, behind which lay a slightly drugged up Claudia.

“Claud,” he breathed a sigh of relief at seeing her at last.

“Jinksy!” she responded with a smile, “You’re alright! Hey look,” she lifted the green scrubs someone gave her to replace her ruined shirt, “Only four stiches, the rest they used butterfly bandages on.”

“She’ll need to have those taken out in a week.” The nurse told Steve, trying to not smile at the lopsided grin the young woman had on her face as a result of the pain killers given to her, “And she’ll have to take it easy as well. There wasn’t much damage, I’m guessing the blood loss was due to an iron deficiency. The doctor recommended she not have any ibuprofen or aspirin or naproxen _or caffeine_ for the next week. Nothing that will thin the blood.”

“So are we good to go?” Steve asked, remembering that just because they were out of harm’s way for the time being, didn’t mean others were. They still needed to bring the pen to Colorado Springs.

“I’ll bring the discharge papers around.”

* * *

Steve was grateful that his parents’ weren’t home, having to go out with some friends for the day and leaving Steve with his mom’s car. He felt bad for the blood in the back seat, and prayed they wouldn’t notice the slight stain that remained after he scrubbed for twenty minutes while Claudia procured them some plane tickets to Colorado Springs- not being exactly  _legal_ in her tactics.

He wrote his parent’s a note and hung it on the fridge, explaining there was an emergency with one of their friends in Colorado and that they would be back Wednesday evening, in time for Thanksgiving.

The hard part was carrying their bags into the airport, as well as walking around with their fresh injuries.

But, as with the rest of their group, their loyalty and love for their friends outweighed any of their own pain and discomfort.


	30. Thankful

Helena and Myka found themselves at the airport once more, only this time Pete was with them, Christina had stayed at the bookstore with Tracy and Amanda. They alternated between pacing back and forth and sitting stoically, waiting for their friends to arrive with the pen.

Claudia had texted Helena hours before, “ _Got EAPPen. Plane taking off now. ETA 5hrs.”_

It was now eight o’clock at night, and the airport was filled with people, arriving and leaving. Going on vacation or going to see family. Myka watched them all pass her by, feeling  _stuck_  and useless, unable to do anything to help her father. Even with the sleeping mask curbing the worst of it, Warren Bering had still had two additional seizures, and Myka found herself mad at Steve and Claudia for taking so long to retrieve the pen, though in reality, she knew, they had gotten it rather quickly.

But until she could put this curiosity mess behind her, she knew reality had no place in her heart or mind. So she was pissed, and Helena worked to keep her in the present. Not bothering to talk, but holding her hand, drawing little patterns on Myka’s arms, leaning over every so often to place a soft kiss on whatever exposed skin was most convenient at the time.

Helena knew when Steve and Claudia had arrived when Myka tensed and Pete breathed a heavy sigh of relief. He’d been having bad vibes all day, and rushed forward to greet his two absent friends, even though he had seen them the night before, he had missed them greatly.

Steve held up is hand, wincing as Pete came to a reeling halt, narrowly missing hitting them. That’s when Pete noticed the way Steve kept all his weight off one leg, the sheen of sweat on his face as he struggled to hold his bags as well as Claudia’s, who was currently clutching her stomach with her own mask of pain.

“What happened?” Pete asked, already moving to relive Steve of the extra weight.

“Curiosity hunting happened,” Steve huffed, his good mood from earlier effectively gone. His day of flying back and fighting and flirting officially and thoroughly wearing him out.

“Can we maybe see a doctor?” Claudia asked in a small voice.

Before Pete could respond they were joined by HG and Myka.

“Did you get it?” Myka asked, an edge of desperation in her voice, “Please tell me you got it.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Claudia smiled through the pain to reassure her friend, “We’ve got the pen, don’t worry. Now, about that doctor…”

Helena gasped as Claudia’s arm fell to her side, revealing a line of blood that was slowly growing on the front of her shirt. Helena bent slightly, lifting the hem of her friend’s shirt just enough to see the wound on her abdomen that had once been stitched up, but Helena was guessing the stitches had torn on the plane ride.

All animosity that Myka had felt earlier disappeared at seeing Claudia and Steve in so much obvious pain. They rushed them to the waiting 4runner- well, as fast as Steve could move with the help of Myka and Claudia with the help of HG.

“What happened to you two?” Pete asked as he accelerated to avoid a red light.

“Crazy sixteen year old with a pen.” Steve grunted.

“Who just happened to have the world’s largest deadliest pendulum hanging around.” Claudia snorted at her own terrible pun which quickly turned to a moan of pain as the action pulled at her wound.

“And you guys got on an airplane after getting stitches?!” Helena demanded, her accent thickening once more as she fretted over Claudia, helping to keep pressure on her stomach.

They both shrugged, “You guys needed us.”

Myka wanted to cry. She had been so focused on helping her father, she put her real family in danger. And when she thought about how angry she had been with Steve and Claudia taking as long as they had retrieving the pen, she wanted to hit herself.

“Pete,” Myka snapped as they pulled up in front of the store, “Run this up to the study, put it on the journal, and tell Dr. Calder we’ll need her help down stairs.” She handed him the static bag as she went around the car to help Steve out of the passenger seat.

Pete did as he was told while they got Steve and Claudia in the store and off their feet. Steve settled for laying on the floor, his pain and exhaustion making him refuse to move when Myka tried to take him to a couch or chair.

Helena carefully deposited Claudia into an arm chair, lifting her shirt once more to assess the damage, “Geese, HG, your girlfriend’s, like, right there.” Claudia joked, but the pain was obvious in her wavering voice.

HG gave her a smirk, “Myka can learn to share.”

“The hell if she can.” Myka said with a smile as she too knelt in front of Claudia, ignoring the fact that she probably go check on her father, “I missed that day of kindergarten.”

“Please,” Claudia snorted, “Like you’ve ever missed a day of school in your life.” Clearly ignoring the previous weeks.

Dr. Calder finally made her appearance with her doctor bag in hand and three very worried looking young adults in toe.

“You’re father’s fine.” Vanessa told her when Myka looked up, “He and your mother have retired for the evening I believe.”

“Christina’s asleep in Myka’s old room,” Tracy answered before HG could ask.

“Trailer’s in Tracy’s room with a bowl of water and a makeshift bed.” Amanda added, she’d had the dog most of the day, and while he had been happy enough, he hadn’t really calmed down until she brought him to the book store and he saw Christina,

“Pete, see if you can take Mr. Jinks up to the couch in the living room,” Dr. Calder nodded to the barely conscious man on the floor, “Amanda, see about pulling the blinds, would you?”

Pete nudged Steve until he was cursing, but up with an arm around his shoulders and moving for the stairs, Pete supporting most of his weight and ignoring the sleepy glare Steve was giving him. And as soon as Amanda had the windows covered, Dr. Calder asked Claudia ro remove her shirt, which she needed help and a few minutes to do.

Vanessa frowned at the wound, “What did this?”

“Have you ever read  _The Pit and the Pendulum_?” Claudia quirked an eyebrow.

Dr. Calder grimaced, “Damn Poe. Okay, I have to remove these stitches and put new ones in, alright? It’s going to be painful, but I think I have something for it.”

“Not a curiosity, right?” She looked up at Dr. Calder with big eyes, resisting the urge to glance at Myka.

“No, not a curiosity,” Vanessa assured her with a smile, before digging around her bag and pulling out a small white packet containing a dose of Vicodin, “I  _am_  a real doctor, you know, not just a Warehouse agent.”

Claudia took the offered pills, and the doctor gave it a few minutes to start to take effect before she began pulling at the ruined stiches and butterfly strips. By the time she was stitched up again, she was snoring softly, and Tracy had retreated to her bed, feeling squeamish at the sight of blood.

Amanda and Myka carried the unconscious techie up the stairs, putting her on the other couch in the living room after zipping a jacket around her. Pete was asleep on a pile of blankets, laying on his stomach on the floor next to Steve’s couch, and Myka smiled, remembering all the times he had stayed there growing up.

Once Claudia was settled with a blanket resting over her, Amanda practically collapsed on the floor, nudging Pete until he shared his makeshift bed with her. Apparently no one was leaving tonight.

Myka went to check on Christina. She tried to be quiet about it, but it was of no use. The four year old was sitting up in bed, clutching her giraffes to her chest and staring out the window. When Myka opened the door, her eyes flashed to her in an instant, and relief played over her worried features.

“Mom,” her shoulders sagged and she suppressed a yawn, clearly fighting sleep.

“Hey, kiddo,” Myka smiled as she stepped into the room, “I thought you went to bed already?”

“I couldn’t sleep.” The four year old frowned, “I’m worried.”

“About what?” Myka sat on the edge of the bed and Christina immediately moved to her lap, laying her head on Myka’s shoulder, relaxing as Myka smoothed her curls made wild by tossing and turning in the bed.

“About your dad,” she said after a moment, “About you and Mummy and Aunt Tracy and Amanda and your mom and Pete and everyone, because no one is telling me what’s going on, but I can see that you’re all upset over something.”

Myka sighed, she had forgotten just how perceptive this little girl was, “My dad’s okay now, kiddo. We were just really worried about him because he was sick, but Aunt Claudia and Steve brought back something that made him all better.”

“Aunt Claudia’s here?” Christian perked up.

“Yeah, but she’s sleeping now, you can see her in the morning, just be careful with her,” Myka warned, “Her and Steve got hurt.”

“Everyone’s getting hurt.” Tears felt silently down Christina’s cheeks.

“I know, sweetie,” Myka cradled the girl closer to her, “But you don’t have to worry, because your mommy and me, we will  _always_  make sure everything is okay.”

“Promise?” Christina asked sleepily.

“I pinky promise.” Myka nodded

Christina held her pinky out and waited for Myka to wrap her own finger around it.

Myka moved to tuck Christina in, but the little girl insisted that Myka lay down next to her, ‘just until she fell asleep.’ Myka applied, and both were soon fast asleep.

Down stairs, HG and Vanessa stood talking in hushed tones.

“We need to talk,” the doctor said seriously before moving for the front door and opening it, revealing another older blonde woman Helena didn’t recognize.

“Hello, Helena,” she greeted with a nod, “My name is Jane, and I need to have a word with you.”

“And just who are you?” Helena asked.

“I work with the Warehouse,” Jane smirked, “I’m a regent, and I’m also Pete’s mother. He doesn’t know and I would like to keep it that way for now, if you don’t mind.”

“I think I need to sit down.” Helena sighed before collapsing into the chair that Claudia had been in.

Jane sat on the ottoman while Vanessa stood behind her, both looking at Helena seriously, but Jane was the one to speak, “You are in contact with James MacPherson.”

It wasn’t a question, but Helena answered it anyway, “Yes I am, what does it matter? He works with you at the Warehouse, doesn’t he?”

Jane and Vanessa exchanged an unreadable look, “He does, but here’s the thing, Helena, James MacPherson is a dangerous person.”

“You don’t think I know that?” Helena asked with a smirk.

“You running errands for him… working for him… him sending you out into the field…” Vanessa shook her head as she listed these things, “We are looking into MacPherson, something isn’t quite right about him, and you are walking a very dangerous path being involved with him.”

“And yet, he is your college,” Helena rolled her eyes, “It isn’t like I sought him out, he found me, you understand.”

“You can’t trust him, Helena.” Jane warned.

“I don’t trust that wanker as far as I can throw him,” Helena’s face twisted in disgust at the thought.

“Then why are you working with him?” Jane asked after she shared another worried look with Vanessa, “For money? As a way into the Warehouse?”

“Because I don’t have a choice.” Helena corrected their accusations through gritted teeth, “Because he brought Myka back, and he has used every moment since to remind me that he can take her, or anyone else I love, away just as easily.”

“Maybe it’s time you take a stand,” Jane suggested, “Help us find a way to take MacPherson out of the Warehouse, help us convince the other Regents that he has become untrustworthy and dangerously unstable.”

They didn’t know then, that she had a plan. A plan to take MacPherson not only out of the Warehouse, but out of the equation all together. Because he would find a way to get to her if he wasn’t taken care of  _permanently_.

“I don’t know,  _Regent_ ,” Helena worked hard not to sneer at them, “I don’t know if I can be a part of anything that puts my family in danger. Look at us already! Myka’s been shot and given PTSD by MacPherson, Claudia’s had her stomach sliced open and Steve’s broken his ankle. We’ve been attacked, threatened and stalked, and all of that before putting this giant target you are offering on our backs. So no  _fucking_  way am I going to get on his bad side, pardon my French. And if you’ll excuse me, I’ve had a really long day and I’d like to get some sleep.”

Jane and Vanessa both sputtered objections, but Helena wasn’t hearing any of it, and she ushered the two older women out of Bering and Sons’, closing and locking the door behind them.

Helena gave herself a moment to just breathe in the silence that surrounded her now. It was a balm on her frayed nerves. She was on autopilot then, checking the windows and doors before moving up the stairs, going door to door to check on her extended family. Tracy fast asleep in her room, the sounds of Warren Bering’s snores filling the whole upstairs, Pete and Amanda huddled on the floor while Steve and Claudia slept on the couches.

She went to the study next, knowing it would be empty, but needing something from it regardless.

She found the two artifacts, the pen laying on top of the closed journal. She stood staring at them both for a long moment, trying to make a decision, one that was best for her family, but being unable to do so. She found the static bag on the floor and put both artifacts inside, shutting her eyes against the reaction it received.

She looked around the room, searching for a place to hide the bag should Vanessa or Jane come back for it. She found one, her tired brain unable to find a better solution. The bottom of the book shelf had a board concealing the area beneath it, with a little wiggling, Helena was able to tilt it up enough to fit the static bag underneath the shelf before pushing the board back into place.

Satisfied for the time being, HG drug her feet to Myka’s old bedroom.

She smiled when she found Myka laying on her side, close to the edge of the bed since, apparently, her daughter was being quite the bed hog. Helena slid beneath the covers behind her daughter, being sure to pull her closer so that Myka would have a little more room.

Finally, after the longest day Helena could remember, she fell into a dreamless sleep with the two most important people in her life sleeping just as soundly beside her.

* * *

The rest of the week went much more smoothly than Monday had, much to the relief of everyone involved.

Tuesday morning rose on an apartment full of grumpy, hungry young adults. Pete was the first awake aside from Warren and Jeannie, the smell of bacon effectively waking him better than any alarm clock, to which Amanda took note.

He sat straight up on the floor, pulling the covers away from his girlfriend, making her groan a complaint as she tried to rub sleep from her eyes. Pete could see the moment she fully came around, her nose twitched and she too sat up faster than anyone thought possible, her blonde hair sticking up every which way as she looked to her boyfriend.

“Bacon?” He asked.

“And coffee,” she sighed a response as her eyes shut slightly at the scents filling the room.

They both stood to see over the back of Steve’s couch and into the kitchen. Warren was sitting at the table, reading the newspaper and sipping from a steaming mug, grimacing- thought it was unclear if it was the bitterness of the news or beverage that caused it. Jeannie was humming tunelessly behind the stove, flipping pancakes and turning bacon.

Amanda and Pete exchanged a look before carefully making their way over to the counter, sitting on the stools and waiting for acknowledgement.

“I hope scrambled eggs are okay?” Jeannie smiled to them, “It’s easier with all of you here. Keeping it simple for me.”

Pete’s mouth was watering before the plate of food was in front of him, and he dug in with a fervor that made it seem as if he hadn’t eaten in days.

“Slow down babe!” Amanda chuckled as she pat him on the back after a coughing fit, “Make sure you save some for everyone else.”

It wasn’t a problem, as it turned out, there was plenty so that even when Claudia and Myka finally came around to waking up, they had a chance to get seconds.

While nearly everyone else had been woken and lured to the kitchen by the smell of food, it was the laughter that drew Myka from her warm bed thirty minutes after Pete and Amanda had woken. She groggily walked to the kitchen, finding Helena waiting for her with a cup of coffee, made just the way she liked it.

Myka inhaled the aroma before sighing happily and giving Helena a good morning kiss. Claudia glared at her friend’s reaction to the liquid gold she had been denied due to doctor’s orders. Everyone knew the techie practically  _lived_ on coffee, and they were taking bets on how long it would take before she caved. No one believed she would make it a whole week.

The seven young adults, one four year old and one dog completely took over the Bering’s living room as Warren and Jeannie looked on with a smile from the fringes. While Christina was busy off to the side with Trailer, Claudia and Steve told them what happened in Jersey, which was actually a thrilling story, and though they all knew how it ended, they all still listened intently.

They switched to lighter topics, mad easier when Pete pulled a slip of paper from the back of Steve’s jeans and demanded to know who Jason Grant was.

“How is it that even in the hospital you manage to give me a run for my money at the numbers game?” Pete asked.

“I’m sorry, the numbers game?” Amanda cut in.

Myka, Pete and Steve gave each other a long look, fighting smiles and avoiding eye contact with the other four.

“What’s the numbers game?” Helena asked, now curious that they hadn’t answered what seemed like an innocent question straight away.

Pete and Steve looked to Myka to answer the question, she sighed, giving them an eye roll before turning to face her girlfriend with a sheepish smile, “See, the numbers game is a game we invented freshman year for when us three went out. Whoever gets the most numbers by the end of the night, wins. But, if you went home with someone you automatically won.”

Claudia snorted while Amanda and Myka squinted at their significant others. Tracy smirked at them, “Wow, I mean, I expect that from Steve and Pete,”

Cries of ‘ _Hey!_ ’ from the two boys went ignored as Tracy went on, “But Mykes, you are, like, the wall flower, did you even stand a chance against them?”

“I did okay,” Myka shrugged.

“Okay?” Pete laughed, seeing a chance to bring his best friend down with him, “The last time we played, Myka won.”

“Oh really?” Helena quirked an eyebrow, “When was this?”

“The tier party at your dorm,” Pete ‘helpfully’ supplied.

“Steve struck a competitive nerve!” Myka said defensively, “Besides, Pete went home with Kelly and Steve hooked up with Liam, so technically I lost!”

“Mykes!” the protested in unison.

“You ended up in someone else’s bed, too.” Claudia pointed out, thoroughly entertained as she watched this drama unfold before them. She  _knew_  Myka had dirt on Pete and Steve that they weren’t sharing.

“That’s not the same thing,” Myka huffed, “I had a few to many to drink.”

Steve and Pete both flinched, but Myka didn’t notice. Helena did, though. Clearly her girlfriend’s former roommates had elected not to tell Myka about just what had been in one of those drinks. And Helena wasn’t about to be the one who told her, Myka was just beginning to trust the outside world again. So she did what she did best, she became the distraction.

“She’s right, you know,” Helena smirked, “Despite my efforts, I could not keep her in my bed.”

Myka blushed while her friends appeared relieved.

“I wish I went to Fairview, now,” Amanda snorted, “From the way it sounds, you guys have a lot more fun than we have in the valley.”

And just like that, the easy flow of conversation continued as they shared more stories with each other. From before they all met, from the time they spent apart.

And for the first time in a long time, they didn’t feel like they were being hunted, or under some sort of time constraint. They weren’t assets for some secret government agency, or victims of a crime. They were just a group of college kids, thrown together by chance whose bond was strengthened by circumstance.

None of the smiles were forced and breathing came easy.

On Wednesday the group had no choice but to fracture once more. Steve and Claudia were driven to the airport, and the techie allowed Helena to worry over her, promising to text her old roommate as soon as they landed to be sure that her stitches didn’t rip once more.

Though they knew the separation would be temporary, no one was really willing to let go of this feeling of completeness that had been with them the previous day. But Steve reminded them that he and Claud were all the family that his parents had left, so they had to go. He had let them spend enough Thanksgivings alone.

They didn’t leave the airport after their plane took off. Helena, Myka and Pete still waited for another hour, searching for another plane that was to be landing shortly. They had volunteered to pick David up from the airport, since they would be there anyway, and Tracy and Amanda had been more than willing to look after Christina for a while.

They stood with their arms crossed, watching the new arrivals meet up with their families, waiting for the man that had gotten Tracy pregnant.

He had a bag slung over his shoulders, tall enough that he was easy for the waiting trio to spot, his sandy hair messy, hazel eyes hidden behind horn-rimmed glasses. He seemed uneasy with the crowds pushing past him, he kept fixing imaginary wrinkles in his sweater vest and button up shirt.

When his gaze fell upon those waiting for him, he relaxed visibly, giving a shy wave as he walked over to them. Myka watched him closely, the way he walked, the way he held himself, always stepping out of the way of people rather than making them step around him. He wasn’t the type Myka was used to seeing her little sister go after. Sure he was tall and handsome, but even walking, Myka could  _see_  just how incredibly awkward he felt with himself.

But Myka supposed that could be because of the three stern expressions he was being met with, and she immediately let herself give him a reassuring smile.  

“You must be David.” Myka held her hand out.

“And you’re Myka,” David nodded as he accepted her hand. He had a solid grip, Myka noticed, and he looked directly into her eyes.

“This is Pete, and Helena,” Myka waved to each of them.

“It’s nice to meet you both,” David spoke earnestly.

“Pleasure,” Helena nodded curtly while Pete just grunted his reply.

They began to walk to the parked car in silence, though Myka couldn’t be sure if David felt the weight of the silence over them.

“How was your flight?” Myka asked, sure she would have to be the one to steer this conversation since Pete seemed content with being intimidating and Helena seemed more concerned with observation.

“It was good,” David shrugged, “Washington’s not so far, two hour flight time.”

“Right,” Myka nodded, “Where was it you’re going to school?”

“Washington State University,” He supplied with a nod and a lopsided grin.

“Go cougars,” Pete’s smile didn’t reach his eyes as he held the door of the car open for David to slide into.

“Here’s the thing David,” Myka sighed as she clicked her seatbelt on, “You knocked my baby sister up, after you two have known each other for exactly four months. So for the next twenty minutes, you are going to be asked a series of questions. And if we don’t like the answers to any of them, well, life is going to get very difficult for you.”

David gulped, but accepted his fate with a nod.

“First off, how old are you, dude?” Pete asked, crossing his arms and turning his torso so that he could stare at the man sitting next to him.

“Twenty three.” He answered quickly.

“Tracy said you have a job, what is it?” Helena asked, not bothering to turn to look at David, settling for watching his reactions in the reflection of the side view mirror.

“Officially? I’m my professor’s teaching assistant,” he lifted one shoulder, tilting his head as he took a breath, “Unofficially? I work on a developing team, but until I get a degree, I keep my TA badge so no one asks why I’m there.”

“What’s the degree you’re working for?” Myka asked, glancing at him in the rear view mirror, noticing how he fixed his glasses and fidgeted with the collar of his shirt.

“Master of Science,” he cleared his throat, “Mechanical Engineering.”

He watched as the two woman in the front seat exchanged a glance that seemed to contain an entire conversation. Helena quirked an eyebrow and Myka lifted one of her shoulders in a half shrug.

Myka and Pete remained silent as Helena asked him a series of rapid fire questions all pertaining to the field of Engineering, being sure that he was who he said he was and not just making things up to impress the people in the car.

“Why Mechanical Engineering?” Myka asked as soon as Helena seemed satisfied that he was in the field he claimed.

David gave a sigh of relief and a sheepish smile, “I’ve always been interested in the way things work, and how to change them so they work better.”

After a few more questions from Pete and HG, they pulled up in front of the Bering residence and Myka shut off the car. She turned around in her seat and looked at David, stared right into his eyes and watched closely for any sign of deception.

“Do you love my sister?” She asked.

David swallowed, gritting his teeth before speaking once more, “More than anything.”

“Good.” Myka nodded, seeming satisfied.

They all filed out of the car, and Helena grabbed his arm, pulling him close so she could speak low. “Listen here, David,” she smiled sweetly, “This girl you are starting a family with, you take care to make sure she feels loved every day for the rest of her life. Oh, and David? If you break her heart, I will break your everything.”

David spent the rest of the day terrified of the family he had just been pulled into. Tracy’s parents didn’t make him half as nervous as the three people his own age had. But Tracy had reassured him later that night that everyone had approved of him, and that the third degree he received earlier meant that they were taking him seriously.

He tried to take comfort in his girlfriend’s reassurance, but he still jumped whenever Helena snapped at him some random seeming question, keeping him on his toes.

HG wasn’t really worried any longer. Not since she had run a background check on him and had Claudia track his phone and social media activity remotely.

Thanksgiving was held at Jane Lattimer’s house. HG had worked not to give the woman much thought for the last two days, working to make this vacation an actual vacation. And she was glad when Jane seemed to be content with pretending this was the first time they were meeting. She only pulled HG aside once, to remind her that she needed to make the right decision.

It was the single dark spot, as far as Helena could tell, on an otherwise perfect holiday. She hadn’t much experience with this American holiday, but it was one she thought she could get behind if it always meant the good times that they had.

Most importantly, Myka seemed incredibly happy and at peace.

They gave up the hotel for the last day of their stay, Myka’s dad insisting they stay in Myka’s old room so that he could have a night cap with his daughter and tell her he loved her, and her mother did to. It was just going to take Jeannie Bering a little while to come to terms with her new reality.

Warren and Jeannie let Helena and Myka sleep in on Friday, as well as David and Tracy, taking Trailer and Christina to the park until noon. Spending as much time with their surrogate granddaughter as they could before Myka and Helena returned home. Warren and Jeannie had fallen under the same spell as everyone had before them. It seemed impossible to spend any amount of time with Christina without falling in love with her.

They all shared one last lunch together before the Bering children had to leave, Tracy back to Washington and Myka back to California.

There were whispered I love yous and promises to call passed between hugs goodbye. Myka smirked when Christina gave each of her parents a kiss on the cheek goodbye, as well as Tracy. Warren pulled Helena to the side, whispering something to her before she nodded and they shook hands. It made Myka curious, but HG refused to tell her what was said.

After picking Pete and Amanda up from Jane’s house, time seemed to fly by, and the next thing she knew, Myka was laying down face first into her own bed in her and Helena’s apartment, exhaustion hitting her like a ton of bricks.

Helena, apparently, felt the same as she fell next to her on the bed, nudging Myka until they were cuddled together on the bed.

Myka breathed in deeply, sleep steadily approaching her, “It’s good to be home.”

Helena hummed in agreement, but Myka was asleep before she could hear it.


	31. Your Stand

Returning to normal life after a week away from it felt odd. But a good odd, Helena supposed. There was classes and work and stress, but it was her routine. It was predictable. Comfortable. Being able to sleep in your own bed, laying with the one you love so close, and know exactly what they day had planned for you was something Helena didn’t think she would ever take for granted.

She had never been more glad for Myka’s presence then in the week that a followed vacation. She was preoccupied with her own thoughts, trying to decide what she would do with the journal and quill pen currently being kept in a glass case in her lab.

Myka noticed her girlfriend’s distraction, but didn’t know the cause. She assumed it was stress at work and with classes, as usual. So she stepped it up, though her own case load wasn’t any lighter, she made an effort to keep things on track around them.

Helena would stare off into space, and Myka had to call her name multiple times, or else physically shake her from her thoughts in order to ask her anything. HG knew her mental absence was taking its toll on Myka, but she couldn’t seem to help it, not until this issue with MacPherson was solved at least.

She had been ignoring his calls and figured it was only a matter of time before he came to Fairview. She needed to do what was right for her family, the problem was that for the time being, she didn’t know what that was.

Thursday night, Helena realized it was too quiet. She was sitting at the kitchen table, unaware of how long she had been sitting there, but there was a pile or sketches and plans and equations in front of her, her hands clearly had not been idle while her mind wandered in circles.

She looked up, realizing now how dark it was in her home. She glanced around, noticing that the kitchen had been cleaned up from dinner, though she didn’t remember eating. She rose to her feet and nearly fell when she realized her legs were asleep. She stretched, her back cracking loudly.

She walked through the apartment, using her hand along the wall to guide her so she wouldn’t have to retrace her footsteps to turn off lights. Christina was found tucked in and fast asleep. After giving her daughter a light kiss on the forehead, Helena then made her way to her own bedroom, expecting to find Myka in much the same manner.

However, Myka was sitting up in bed, the lamp on her side of the bed on, a stack of papers in her lap. She held her glasses in one hand and her head in the other, her hair pulled back in a messy bun, though a few curls had escaped at some point. Helena looked to the clock, it was nearly three in the morning, and she found herself wondering what could have possibly kept her girlfriend awake all night when she had finally returned to a normal sleeping pattern.

Her tired and aching muscles wanted her to go collapse on her own side of the bed, but she forced her feet to bring her to Myka, kneeling on the floor so she could look up into Myka’s eyes even when she kept her head hung low.

“What’s the matter, love?” she placed a hand on Myka’s leg.

Myka huffed out a breath and sat with her back to the head board, looking down at Helena’s tired but concerned gaze, “I took your advice.” She said finally, her voice thick with tears yet unshed.

“You did?” HG worked hard to not allow her voice or face to betray her confusion, what advice was she referring to? When was the last time Helena gave Myka advice?

“I read it,” Myka continued, “I don’t know what I was expecting. I mean, my father had been great the week we were there, so different from how I remembered him growing up. And then he gives me this book he had been working on since… I don’t even know how long. And I was hoping for, I don’t know, some sort of explanation maybe, for how he acted towards me when I was growing up.

A book? Warren had written a book? And given it to Myka to read? When? And when had she told Helena? When had she asked for advice on what to do? “And? What did you find?” she asked out loud.

“It was beautiful,” she gestured to the thick manuscript on her lap, “And as I read it, I found myself identifying with it less and less. I remember some of the things he was referencing, but none of it felt like it was _my_ life. None of it felt real to me. And as much as he talked about how much I meant to him, I found myself wondering why he couldn’t just tell me that when I needed it. Why did he have to make me feel like I constantly fell short of all of his expectations? What gave him the right to make me feel like a disappointment then turn around and write something like that?”

The tears were falling freely down her face now, and Helena climbed over her into the bed, holding Myka against her and letting her cry. With her arms around her, one of her hands on her hair and rocking her gently back and forth, Helena spoke soothing words to Myka, most of them nonsense just meant to calm her, but some of it actually rang in truth.

“Your father loves you, Myka,” HG’s voice was hardly above a whisper, so Myka had to quiet herself to hear, “Your mother _loves_ you. They just don’t have a very good way of showing it. And it’s okay to _want_ them to have been better parents to you. Hell, I don’t think there’s a kid alive who doesn’t have a few complaints about their parents. It’s okay.”

Myka finally fell asleep in Helena’s arms, while she herself was left to stare at the ceiling until her alarm for work went off the following morning. Her head was throbbing, her eyes burning, muscles aching, but she forced herself into the shower and into fresh clothes.

Knowing it was Myka’s day off, Helena wanted to let her rest, so she fed the dog, got Christina ready and drove her to school herself before heading to Leena’s. She texted Claudia from the parking lot, asking her to pick Christina up from school at two thirty so Myka could relax. She had penned the hopefully still sleeping brunette a note before leaving, explaining she had nothing to worry about for the day, that it had all been taken care of.

Her exhaustion and mental preoccupation, however, was making working difficult. She brought the wrong order to one of her regular customers, shattered a plate, and spilled scalding coffee on herself.

Leena finally pulled her off of the floor and into her office, sitting her on the couch while pulling her own office chair around to sit in front of her.

“What’s wrong with you, HG?” Leena asked, her voice full of maternal concern, “You’re dead on your feet, you gave Kyle the wrong order when he orders the _same_ thing every single day, you broke a plate, something you haven’t done since your second week of work, and you spilled coffee on yourself! When you weren’t even pouring coffee. You’ve been distracted since you came back from Colorado, is everything okay?”

“Okay?” Helena repeated, using the moment to decide whether or not she was going to open up to Leena. She had been talking freely with the older student for a while, but for some reason, Helena still had difficulty asking anyone for help, “No, I suppose everything is not okay.”

“What happened?” Leena asked, leaning forward in her chair to watch Helena closely.

HG took a breath before explaining everything that had happened the week prior, the artifact and the damage it caused, the confrontation with Jane and Vanessa, Jeannie’s attitude towards Myka after she came out to them. She also went on to talk about how distracted she had been since, trying to figure out _what_ exactly the right thing to do was, how it was beginning to affect her everyday life.

Leena listened to all of this quietly, a contemplative look on her face, nodding now and again to let HG know she was still listening. She let them sit in silence for a moment after Helena had finished her story.

“I am going to say something,” Leena warned, “And you may not like it, but I need you to hear me, okay?” she waited for HG to nod skeptically before continuing, “You need to stop and look at what your doing, and the reasons behind your actions.

“This MacPherson guy is clearly a bad person, HG, and you helping him, even for your own means, is wrong. If Jane is right, you helping him is dangerous for a lot more people than just you and your immediate family. I think you know what you have to do, Helena. You know it’s time to make a stand.”

“But Myka,” Helena paled, “MacPherson has the dog tags, not to mention access to god only knows how many more artifacts, and his threat wasn’t exactly subtle. And he knows where Sykes is, I just know it.”

“Helena,” Leena shook her head, “James MacPherson is _always_ going to hold those you love over you. Your love is his power. The only way that you’ll be able to be out from underneath him, the only way that your family will be safe, is if you help these people bring him down. As far as Walter Sykes is concerned, did you ever stop to consider that he was working for MacPherson all along? And that if you help Jane take down MacPherson, Sykes will soon follow?”

Helena fell back into the couch, thinking over what Leena was telling her. She knew that it was the right thing, helping the Warehouse to take down MacPherson. And it wasn’t as if she was doing a stellar job by herself. Perhaps if she thought of it as them helping her instead of the other way around, it would be easier for her to accept. Allowing her to keep some semblance of control.

“Look, just, _think_ about what I told you, alright?” Leena asked as she rose, “And please, stay in here and take a nap. You’re no use to me out there if you can’t even keep your eyes open.” She smiled.

Helena returned the smile and accepted her offer, laying back once more, thinking she would only close her eyes for a moment. Just rest for a minute or two, then she could get right back to trying to figure this all out…

Helena fell asleep at eleven in the morning, and no one woke her until four in the afternoon. She was groggy and grumpy, her sense of time completely thrown off due to the five hour nap. The only reason she didn’t strangle the person who woke her was because she signed her paychecks. Also she only woke her to tell her to go home.

Helena complied, dragging her feet out the back exit and to her car. The sun was setting early, which made everything feel surreal. Helena sat in her car and watched it for a moment before taking out her cell phone. She had eight missed calls from Macpherson, one from Claudia and one from a number she didn’t recognize. Listening to her voice mail- skipping over the angry British yelling from MacPherson- she learned that Claudia had picked Christina up and was taking her out for a movie and ice cream, not to expect them back until five.

She frowned at not finding a single text message or phone call from Myka, but she figured after sleeping in, Myka had busied herself with _something_ , not wanting to have wasted the day. But Helena still found herself feeling off. Not quite angry, not quite worried, but somewhere in between with a splash of confusion.

She was already frowning as she drove the familiar road to their apartment, and she was fishing her purse for her keys as she walked the path to the front door, perhaps that’s why she didn’t realize that anything was wrong at first. Not until she moved to put her key in the dead bolt and found the front door already slightly ajar.

Helena’s stomach fell to her feet as she pushed the door open slowly, putting her purse to the floor just inside. The lights were out and the silence around her was deafening.  She held her breath and flipped the first set of lights on, gasping at what the light revealed.

Over turned shelves and cabinets, books and papers strewn everywhere, drops of blood on the entry way floor. Helena tiptoed to the kitchen, keeping her back to the wall until she reached the sink. Opening the cabinet on well-oiled hinges, Helena crouched slightly so she could grab the tesla she kept hidden, duct taped to the garbage disposal. She set it to charge as she listened intently. She could hear _something_ shuffling, and she held her breath, walking through the apartment with her tesla aimed.

If she thought the front of the apartment was a mess, what she found later was a disaster. Christina’s room was untouched, as well as the front bathroom and guest room. It wasn’t until she got to her and Myka’s room that a cold shiver ripped through her.

It was clear their door was booted in, the shoe print still visible by the handle. The room was completely destroyed, it was clear this is where struggle that began at the door way ended for someone. Helena’s heart began to race as the events played out in her over active imagination. Myka opening the front door to her attackers, trying to fight them off in the kitchen, the living room, most likely running to the bedroom in search of another Tesla they kept hidden in the bedside table. But she hadn’t made it.

The sound of  low whimper had Helena swinging her aim to the other side of the bed, prepared to shoot. But what she found had her dropping her gun and on her knees beside him.

Trailer’s front and rear paws were bound with duct tape, as well as his muzzle, which was coated in blood. His brown eyes rolled up to Helena and he let out another weak whimper. Helena searched for something to cut the tape, already feeling the sting of tears in her eyes. The letter opener worked just fine, but she had to be careful pulling the tape from Trailer’s fur and skin. HE cried out in pain, but held still as HG worked on him, stretching up to lick her face when his muzzle was free.

She wrapped his arms around his neck for a moment before pulling out her phone, preparing to dial 911, but was interrupted by her phone buzzing once more, MacPherson’s number flashing now. She had a sickening feeling in her gut as she answered the call.

“Hello?” the word was a whisper as it left her, but it was heard just fine.

“Ah, HG, you are a hard woman to get a hold of, aren’t you?” James chuckled darkly on the other end, “I figured it would take something drastic to get your attention. Was I right? Do I have your attention now?”

“Yes.” Her voice was strangled, coming from between tightly clenched teeth, “Where’s Myka?”

“She’s… a little tied up at the moment, but I think it’s time you and I had a little chat, my dear,” he kept his tone conversational, “About you keeping things from me I specifically asked for. Now, I thought I was quite clear on what I wanted from you, and what would happen if I didn’t get it.”

“I’ll bring you the journal and the pen,” HG offered quickly, “I’ll bring them to you now, just don’t hurt her.”

“Now, now Helena, you should know that deal is out the window. You had a chance to bring me those already.” His tone was steadily growing darker, “You will bring me those artifacts because if you don’t I will not hesitate to kill your precious Myka. I cannot, however, promise that she won’t get hurt.” He chuckled again.

“Don’t you dare touch her,” Helena growled into the phone as anger began to take over.

“The only question now, is how much will you allow me to hurt her? It is up to you, HG. There is another artifact I want, and the longer you take to bring it to me, the more creative I become with your girlfriend.”

“What do you want?” Helena could feel her heart beating, feeling as if it was trying to break free from her chest.

“That’s the spirit,” she could hear the smile in his voice now, “I think you’ll need to write this down…” he listed five different artifacts and Helena scrambled to write them into the skin of her arm.

“How do I know she’s alright?” Helena finally asked.

There was a beat of silence on the other end before she heard a shout of pain and a string of curses that were heart breaking familiar, “Now Myka, your girlfriend would like to speak with you, but if you’re going to be rude…”

“Helena?” Myka’s voice carried over the phone, “Helena don’t do what he’s asking! Don’t do it!” there was a sharp sound and Myka was cut off.

“If you hurt her I swear to God, MacPherson, I’ll kill you.” She warned a bit desperately.

“Tick tock, Miss Wells, tick tock.”


	32. Team

The phone went dead in her hands, and Helena sat there on the floor, unmoving, unblinking, staring at it in her hands. It wasn’t until Trailer, sensing one of his owners distress, whined and wiggled his way onto her lap.

She ran a hand through his fur while her mind seemed stuck forever on the sound of Myka crying out it pain. Hadn’t she been hurt enough? Hadn’t the world inflicted enough damage on her? Tried to extinguish her light too many times before? What did she ever do to deserve a fate like this one?

The answer was simple. She decided to be with someone like Helena.

Helena changed her clothing from her uniform to something that better suited her mood, t-shirt, leather jacket, jeans, and flat heeled boots as well as an attitude that was begging for a chance to kick someone’s ass. She found Trailer’s leash in the warzone of her apartment. She grabbed anything she thought she would need, her tesla, her car keys, a bag of Christina’s clothes, the grappler she had given to Myka.

She drove to her lab, calling Claudia on the way, telling her to stop what she was doing and get there straight away, not offering any explanation, hoping the urgency in her tone would be enough to get her friend moving.

She called Steve next, telling him where to go, but when he asked why she just snapped at him to get there as quickly as possible. Pete was easier to convince to drop what he was doing at go to the science building, he’d been having a bad vibe all day, it almost painful in its intensity. He dragged Amanda to his car and pulled away as soon as he disconnected with HG.

She paced the length of her lab, Trailer following closely at her heels, growling softly, his owner’s obvious tension putting him on alert. When the lab door swung open without warning, Helena spun to aim her tesla and Trailer let out a series of barks,

“Whoa, dude!” Claudia quickly turned her back to Helena, using her body as a shield between Christina and her mother, “Chilax it’s just us!”

Helena dropped her arms to her sides, letting out the breath she held in a huff, “Sorry, Claud, hurry and close the door. You weren’t followed, were you?”

“What? No, no, I don’t think so…” Claudia set Christina down, and Trailer ran to the girl, herding her further into the room. She giggled at the dogs antics, allowing him to push her to a corner.

“Well, which is it?” Helena demanded, “No or you don’t think so?”

“No, no I wasn’t followed,” Claudia crossed her arms over her chest, moving to sit on her work bench, “What’s going on, HG? Why are we here?”

“Myka’s been taken,” Helena whispered, looking over her shoulder to be sure her daughter was too busy with the dog to overhear what she was saying, “Our place was trashed, and he called me.”

“He? He who? Where is she?” Claudia jumped to her feet.

Before HG could answer her, the door opened once again, revealing a very worried looking Pete leading confused looking Amanda and Steve.

“Amanda,” Helena sighed before going to her, “I need to ask you a favor, it is of the upmost importance, please.”

“What is it?” the blonde tilted her head, looking from Pete back to the crazed looking woman before her.

“I need you to take Christina and go.” Helena spoke carefully, fighting back fear and tears, “I need you to take my daughter, get on a plane or train or anything, and get her away from here.”

“What’s going on, Helena?” She demanded, glancing over HG’s shoulder to the laughing girl in the corner.

“Myka’s been taken,” she repeated, leading the three of them further into the lab so she could tell this story to them all at once, “We did some dangerous things on our spring break, and it’s come back to bite us in the ass.”

Pete and Steve’s eyes widened, and Amanda opened her mouth to ask more questions, but Helena cut her off.

“That’s all you need to know, Amanda, you need to take Christina, maybe go get David and Tracy to go with you. You need to be as far away from us.  You need to be as involved as little as possible, there are things we haven’t told you, because that would put you in danger as well. So until I get her back, you need to disappear. Because this man who has Myka is going after the ones we love most.” She was fighting back tears now.

Amanda was torn, she knew whatever this was her boyfriend and his friends were involved in was dangerous, especially since one of them had been apparently kidnapped. She could tell by the way Helena held herself that she was close to snapping, barely holding herself together. It was against her better judgment to do what she was about to, but she guessed that over the last few months, these people had become her friends as well, not just Pete’s. And she realized that she would do whatever they needed.

“Alright,” she nodded, and relief washed over Helena for a spilt second, “I’ll get your daughter to safety, as look as you swear to me you will bring Pete back me in one piece.”

“I swear to you, I will do everything in my power to not allow anyone else to get hurt because of this.” Helena pulled Amanda in for a tight hug.

The other three stayed quiet as Helena pulled out a stack of cash from her purse as well as Christina’s passport and her bag of clothes, handing them over to Amanda, “Don’t tell me or anyone else where you’re going. Don’t take your cell phone. I’ll find a way to get a hold of you when this is over, but until then… Take care of my daughter,  _please_.”

“I will, Helena.” Amada assured her, “Just get Myka back.”

“Mummy?” Christina asked softly as they were saying goodbye at the lab door, it had been less than five minutes since they arrived, “What’s wrong? Where’s Mom?”

Helena held her daughter tightly, “We’re going to get Mom back, don’t worry. You’re just going to go on a little trip with Amanda.”

“I don’t wanna go, I wanna stay with you! I want Mom.” Christina cried into Helena’s shoulder.

“I know, my darling, I know,” Helena rubbed her back, “But it isn’t safe for you here. And me, Pete, Claudia, and Steve, we are going to get Myka back. And we can only do that if we know you and Amanda are safe, okay? I need you to be a big girl now. I need your strength, love.”

Christina sniffled as she pulled away from her mother, wiping her nose on the sleeve of her jacket as she nodded, “Okay, Mummy. I love you.”

“I love you, too, darling,” Helena kissed her daughter’s forehead, “So, so very much.”

Amanda kissed Pete goodbye, warning him against doing anything stupid and to come back home to her. Then she took Christina’s hand, and with one more wave goodbye, left the four of them alone with a dog that was whimpering softly once more.

“Now,” Steve turned to Helena, “Tell us what happened.”

“The agents, the man they work for,” Helena began, “He brought Myka back after she had been shot by Walter Sykes, but only on the condition that I hand over the curiosities we had collected, and continue to help him whenever he asked for it. And I did, for a while. Until the journal and pen.”

“What happened, HG?” Pete pressed.

“I knew he was shady, I had been hoping getting close to him would help me bring him down as well as find Sykes. But I wasn’t the only one trying to take MacPherson down. The ‘secret government agency’ that you spoke of, Peter, they exist. MacPherson was working for him, but they have been trying to get him out because he is… well, evil. They asked me for help, so I haven’t given MacPherson the journal, trying to figure out what I was going to do. So he took Myka. And now he wants the journal as well as five other curiosities. And if I don’t get them to him, he’ll kill her.” Her voice broke with tears even as her eyes filled with rage.

“Alright then,” Pete clapped his hands, “Let’s do this.”

“We need a plan, Pete,” Helena pointed out, “And a little help.”

“Help?” Steve asked, “From who? Who’s going to help us with this?”

“I have a couple of contacts with the Warehouse- the government agency, as well as two others who know everything and will help us.” Helena took a breath, “Okay, first things first, Claudia, turn on your curiosity finder while we make some phone calls.”

“You got it,” Claudia nodded before sitting at her desk and booting up her computer, an intense look on her face.

“Steve, you call Abigale Cho at the Red Couch, tell her we need her here now, that it’s an emergency involving Myka.” Helena wrote her number on a sheet of paper before handing it to him.

“The book shop owner?” Steve quirked an eyebrow, “Seriously?”

“Seriously, she can help us, and she knows about the Warehouse,” HG nodded before turning to Pete, “You need to call your mother, she’s involved in this as well.”

“My  _mom_?” Pete pulled back.

“Yes, your mom. I didn’t know she was a part of it until Colorado, she didn’t want me to tell you, but I don’t exactly have a choice now. Call her and tell her what’s happening. I’ll call Dr. Calder and Leena.”

“The coffee shop owner?” Pete and Steve asked in unison now.

“Yes,” Helena rolled her eyes, “Just trust me, would you?” she was already dialing Vanessa and the two boys shrugged, both doing as HG asked.

“Calder,” Vanessa greeted.

“Doctor, MacPherson’s taken Myka,” HG began. “I think it’s safe to say, I’ve made my decision, and I need your help. How soon can you get here?”

“Where are you?” Dr. Calder asked quickly, the sound of shuffling in the background.

“I’m in the science building at Fairview College.” Helena sighed, “In a lab I… repurposed. It’s beneath the first floor in wing C.”

There was a pause on the other end, “We’ll be there in a couple minutes.”

“We?” Helena pulled back. “Who’s we?”

But the other end of the line went dead. Helena stared at the phone in her hand, trying to figure out what just happened. Clearly Dr. Vanessa was bringing someone, and she was closer to them than Helena had previously thought.

Deciding to deal with that puzzle when Vanessa came around, dialing Leena’s number instead.

“Leena’s Café, how may I help you?” she chimed from the other end, though her voice was a bit stressed. Helena looked down at the time, realizing that she had called in the middle of dinner rush, and the diner would be swamped with customers, especially on a Friday night.

“Leena, it’s me, look I know you’re busy, but I need your help.” Helena kept her tone low, her words quick.

“Helena? What is it, what’s wrong?” The background noise lessened considerably, so HG figured Leena stepped away from the main floor.

“I made my stand too late,” Helena admitted, “And I need help.”

* * *

Vanessa and Jane arrived together, joined by two other older adults, only one of which anyone in the room recognized.

“Professor Neilson?” Claudia, stared at him, seeming to forget how to close her mouth, “What are you doing here?”

“I was told my help was needed.” He grumbled as he admired the lab around him. It was obviously set up with great care by whoever did it. He recognized some of the tools and machines in the room, but he could tell most of them had either been created or changed in some way by the two women who worked here.

“You know about the Warehouse?” Helena watched him explore her lab, nervous to see him inspect her work so closely.

“Of course I do,” he huffed, “I used to work there.”

“So, hold on,” HG held out a hand to stop his wandering, “When we brought you Franklin’s Key last semester, you knew exactly what it was?”

“Yes,” Arthur rolled his eyes, “I did. What was I supposed to tell you? Sorry, that’s a magical key and I am going to have to take it from you and store it away with a bunch of other magical things.”

“Maybe you should have!” HG snapped, “Did you ever stop to think that if, perhaps, you had explained to us what it was, that we wouldn’t have decided to try and figure it all out for ourselves and none of this would have happened?”

“Are you saying that this is all my fault?” Arthur demanded.

“Of course not,” Helena shook her head, “But you could have helped us.”

“I wasn’t in the Warehouse anymore! I just wanted to leave that behind me and be a professor and live my life in peace.” He barked.

“Children!” the other woman that Helena did not recognize snapped at them, “Perhaps we should stop bickering amongst ourselves and focus on the issue at hand?”

HG looked at her, dark skin, dark eyes, dark hair, all in sharp contrast with her white skirt and blazer. She had difficulty trying to pin point how old she was, but from the air of authority surrounding her, she was clearly the one in charge.

“Who are you?” Helena asked finally, the other three seeming too uncomfortable to ask.

“My name is Mrs. Fredric, and you are all going to help me save my Warehouse from James Macpherson.”

“I don’t think that James is  _really_  as bad as you’re saying he is.” Arthur grumbled, “He was my partner for years, Irene, he wouldn’t…”

Helena turned on her favorite teacher with a heated glare, “Excuse me, Professor, but your partner broke into my home and kidnapped my girlfriend. And every experience I have had with him and his agents prior have proven to me that he very much  _would_. He is holding her doing god knows what, and I will not stand here listening to you try and defend that man.”

There was a knock at the lab door, interrupting the tension filled moment, and Jane Lattimer looked around, “Are we expecting someone else?”

Claudia let in Leena and Abigale who both looked around at all the people waiting for them.

“Who are they?” Arthur demanded.

“Leena and Dr. Cho,” Helena supplied, “They are both fully aware of all the things that have happened over the last nine months, and we could use their help.”

“You told them about the artifacts?” Professor Nielson grumbled.

“I was brought in by Dr. Calder to be Myka’s therapist after she was shot and brought back by one of your  _artifacts_  by James MacPherson.” Abigale crossed her arms, not liking the tone in this man’s voice.

“Which artifact?” Arthur paled.

“Dog tags?” She looked to Helena for conformation.

“He used some medic’s world war two dog tags,” HG explained, “He said that they would heal all the damage done by fire arms, but that there were… side effects.”

“Sever post-traumatic stress disorder,” his voice was a horrified whisper, “People who have used them have ended up snapping, losing all sense of reality and hurting people around them. Why would James use them on a kid?”

“Because he didn’t care what they did to her,” Helena growled, “All he cared about was that I help him with his little curiosity retrievals. And now that we are all caught up, do you think we could maybe talk about how we are going to get Myka back from your psychotic partner before he kills her?”

“What did James say when he called you?” Mrs. Fredric asked, her voice absurdly calm.

“He said that he wanted me to bring him Edgar Allen Poe’s pen and journal, or else he would kill Myka.” HG swallowed, “He also asked for five other artifacts that he wanted, and the longer I took to bring them to him, the more he would hurt her.”

“What artifacts did he ask you to bring?” the mysterious woman asked.

“Er,” Helena glanced down to the pen markings on the skin of her forearm, “Let’s see, Adolf Hitler’s Microphone, William Tell's Rabbit Foot, The Golden Rope, Miles Davis' First Trumpet and something called Mehmed II's Silken Cord.”

The three Warehouse agents looked to one another, concern and shock on their faces.

“What?” HG demanded, “What is it?”

“Those artifacts have already been collected, and  _should_ be in the Warehouse.” Arthur crossed his arms, “ _I_ collected the rabbit foot myself.”

“Isn’t that what you said about Edgar Allen Poe’s Journal?” Helena turned to Dr. Calder, “And what about the other artifacts we collected, were they already brought in by other agents?”

“What were they again?” Professor Neilson pressed.

“Let’s see, there was Anne Bonny’s Cutlass,” HG offered.

“Godfrid's Spoon,” Claudia added with a grimace.

“Richard E. Byrd’s Tabaco Pipe,” Pete rubbed the back of his head, remembering the kid who fought like someone twice his size.

“William Shakespeare’s Lost Folio,” HG thought for a moment, “Though Sandra and Raymond were there, and took it with them.

“The same thing with Reverend Paris’ Bible.” Steve piped up.

“That’s not including Franklin’s key, or the pings that I gave to MacPherson without looking into what the curiosity was.” HG sighed.

“Those were all in the Warehouse, how did they get out?” Professor didn’t seem to be talking to anyone but himself.

“Agents St. Clair and Secord were looking into the spike in artifacts setting off alarms,” Mrs. Fredric answered him anyway, “They believed someone on the inside was releasing the artifacts already collected. But there was no way to prove it. Records of collected Artifacts had been tampered with.”

“Why would James do that?” Arthur sounded lost, remembering the pain, the suffering that had resulted from one of the artifacts that had been released from the Warehouse.

“We fully intend to ask him that,” Jane spoke up, “As soon as we can locate him.”

“He’s not at the Warehouse?” HG’s face paled, “Where is he then? How am I supposed to bring him these artifacts if I can’t find him?”

“We believe he has a plan for you after you’ve collected what he’s asked for.” Dr. Calder spoke up, “He wants to stay hidden from you until you have what he wants.”

“Then I guess we had better get to work then.”


	33. Tick Tock

 

“If I add in my own program to the one you have set up, we can target these specific artifacts and find where they are,” Arthur pulled a stool up next to Claudia, “That way we don’t have to wait a few hours for it to pull up every artifact in the United States.”

“I’ve been trying to figure out a way to do that,” Claudia admitted as she pushed the computer’s keyboard in front of her Physics professor, “But I didn’t have the specific variables to input, though I guess _you_ would. Then I thought about hacking Sandra and Raymond’s boss’ computer, but I didn’t know where to start to find it.”

Arthur smirked, “I’m sure it was only a matter of time until you found it. Our security isn’t as tight as I would like it to be. We brought a guy in to fix it… but I don’t know how well that’s worked…”

“Because you left.” Claudia supplied, trying to watch Professor Nielson’s face closely, but it was difficult to read the emotions when his eyes were hidden under thick eyebrows and behind glasses.

“Because I left.” Arthur agreed, though he knew it wasn’t needed.

They sat in charged silence for a moment as Arthur typed away madly on the keys before Claudia got the nerve to break it, “Why did you leave?”

It seemed as if Arthur wasn’t going to answer the question, choosing to ignore Claudia’s presence all together. But half way through a line of code, his fingers staccato incorrectly and he sighed heavily, stopping his movements and staring at the reflection in the monitor.

“I messed up,” it was nearly a whisper.

“It’s okay, just delete the line and you can-,” Claudia stopped speaking when she realized it was a response to her earlier question.

“I sent them after an artifact without researching what it was or-or insisting I go with them,” he went on, “We were so swamped and I was exhausted and I just… sent them to their deaths. And if it turns out that it was my _partner’s_ fault that they died… I’m even more responsible than I thought.” He went on typing, his finger’s moving faster, but more rigidly.

“Listen, Professor…” Claudia tried to get his attention, but he went on typing, “Artie, hey, listen to me.”

Arthur stopped his finger’s movements once more, but refused to look at his student.

“The only person there is to blame for your agent’s deaths… for pretty much _everything_ crappy that has happed, is MacPherson.” She insisted, “If he hadn’t been releasing dangerous artifacts, you never would have been swamped with cases, and your agents never would have been put in jeopardy. So don’t blame yourself, it isn’t your fault.”

“It wasn’t your fault either, you know,” Artie became solely focused on his cuticles, and Claudia didn’t follow what he was saying at first, “I read your files, your psych evals, your social services case. Claudia, none of what happened to you was your fault.”

Claudia looked down at the table, fighting back tears.

“Your parents, your sister, they were killed by that drunk driver. And your brother… you brother was addicted to drugs, and he thought he was doing what was best for you putting you in the system. Now whether or not that was right or wrong doesn’t matter, what matters is: it wasn’t your fault. Your family was taken from you, you didn’t push them away. And now look, you’ve got a new family, full of people who care about you, wouldn’t ever leave you. You’re doing okay, kid.”

Claudia breathed out, wiping at the corners of her eyes to capture the tears. No one had ever told her any of that. She didn’t know it was something that she needed to hear. But it had taken a weight off of her chest that she had grown used to over the past thirteen years.

“Thanks.” She mumbled.

“Don’t mention it.” He spoke gruffly, trying to go back to his usual demeanor, and Claudia smiled.

His movements became fluid after that, and it was only a matter of time before his coding was finished, and they had a working artifact detector searching _only_ for the five artifacts they were looking for.

It took an hour to get a ping. And it was a stress filled hour in a charged atmosphere, making it feel much longer than sixty minutes. Everyone rushed to the machine alerting them. A red dot on the map of the United States, zooming in, zooming in, zooming in, locking on to a location.

“Which one is it?” Jane asked, looking over Artie and Claudia’s shoulders as they read through the results on the screen.

“Miles Davis' First Trumpet,” Arthur informed them, a tone of awe in his voice, “Whoever plays it has the power to control large groups of people… it’s supposed to be stored in the Dark Vault.”

“What’s in the Dark Vault?” Pete asked.

“You don’t want to know.” Arthur assured him.

“The real question is, what the _hell_ is in Boone Wisconsin?” Claudia made a face at the computer as it stopped it search.

“If it’s where the trumpet is, it’s where we need to be,” Arthur sighed, “Who’s up first?”

“Me,” Helena stepped forward, “I can go, clearly, by your tone, this curiosity is dangerous, so I think I should be the one to go after it.”

Everyone made a face, clearly not agreeing with this situation, but not having a better option at the moment.

“You’ll need ear plugs,” Arthur began, “And a weapon of some sort. Plus, no one goes out into the field alone. You need a partner.”

“I’ve got the tesla.” Helena assured him.

He didn’t seem to like that very much, “You got a tesla? How did you-?” he seemed incapable of finishing that thought.

“Claudia invented it,” Helena made a face.

“Yeah, with your help,” Claudia rolled her eyes, pulling out the schematics and prototypes from her desk as well as what functioning models she had available.

Artie’s face was stuck on shock for so long, HG thought that perhaps they had broken him, but he quickly snapped back to reality, “No matter, you still need to take someone with you.”

“I’ll go,” Pete stepped forward.

“I don’t think so,” Helena shook her head at the same time Steve also objected.

“And why the hell not?” Pete demanded, his chest puffing out.

“I promised Amanda you would survive this, so you aren’t going after possibly the most dangerous artifact _on_ this list.” Helena explained when Pete went on arguing.

“Myka would kill me if I let anything happen to you,” Pete’s face fell, and HG’s heart broke for him, but she wouldn’t budge on this.

“Don’t worry,” Jinks stepped forward, “I’ll go with her. There’s four other artifacts, Pete, you’ll get in on the fun, too.” Steve forced a smile as he clapped Pete on the shoulder.

The computer pinged again, drawing everyone’s attention, “Dibs.” Pete mumbled, crossing his arms as they waited for the computer to pinpoint the activity.

“New York City,” Claudia nodded, “Looks like the lower Manhattan area has the most activity.”

“What’s the artifact?” Leena stepped up. Everyone was a little shocked at how easily the coffee shop owner was accepting this new reality.

“It’s the Golden Rope.” Artie sighed, “It’s another mind control artifact, but it’s on a smaller scale than the trumpet to be sure. It’s mostly used to extract the truth from someone. It _was_ housed in the super hero section of the Warehouse.”

“Golden rope?” Pete finally perked up, “As in, Wonder Woman’s lasso of truth?”

“It’s what that comic is based on,” Arthur allowed, “Pete, why don’t you and Leena go to New York and collect it, since you called ‘dibs’.”

Pete and Leena looked to each other before Pete broke out in a grin and shrugged. It was clear there was a hesitation there for him, about going out to collect an artifact with someone he didn’t really know. But he had a good feeling about Leena, and he needed to save his best friend.

Vanessa and Abigale got assigned to go after the Silken Cord from Seattle Washington, where it was wreaking havoc amongst families with multiple children. The two doctors seemed friendly with each other, having got to know each other pretty well through phone calls and emails, even if their friendship was built on the illness of the woman they were now working to save now.

Mrs. Fredric and Jane insisted that they be the ones who travel to the District of Colombia to collect the microphone that had belonged to Adolf Hitler. After the trumpet, it was one of the most dangerous artifacts on the list, and it was of the utmost importance that they collect the artifact quickly and quietly so as not to disturb the nation’s capital. The Warehouse had a shaky relationship with the government as it was.

That left Artie and Claudia to go after the Rabbit’s foot down in Austin, Texas. It was a sort of grudge thing for Arthur, having been the one to snag it in the first place, he was angry that it had found its way back out into the world. Claudia was a little apprehensive about working with the professor, but she was mostly glad no one was telling her she couldn’t help with the retrievals.

They all a parted, Helena taking Trailer when the dog refused to leave her side, into the night. No one thought of resting, they could rest on the plane ride to their separate destinations. They all agreed to meet back in the lab as soon as the artifacts were collected.

It took Leena and Pete a day and a half to locate the golden rope. Vanessa and Abigale two days to get their hands on the sibling rivalry artifact. The same for Arthur and Claudia with the rabbits foot that turned out to be not so lucky, a story Claudia was refusing to share with Pete.

The six returned hunters waited for the remaining in their group. Pacing the lab and twiddling their thumbs. Claudia studied the artifacts when no one was paying attention, still insanely interested in how they worked.

Mrs. Fredric and Jane were the next to return, both looking worse for wear.

“And that is why I _hate_ politics.” Pete heard his mom hiss when they returned with the microphone in hand.

Artie made sure that _that_ particular artifact did not go into the hands of the curious techie. God only knows what she would have done with it, even accidentally.

It was nearly dark on that third day when Steve and Helena walked in. Or maybe _stumbled_ was the more appropriate word for it. Steve seemed incapable of walking without the help of Helena.

“What happened?” Claudia rushed to her friends’ aid.

“His ear plugs were uncomfortable.” HG rolled her eyes and allowed the redhead to take her best friends off of her hands, “So that’s it, we’ve collected them all?”

“Yes,” Artie nodded, “All snagged, bagged and tagged,” he sighed, “Now if only they would stay that way.”

“What do you do now?” Pete asked her, talking over the grumbling former agent.

“I’m gonna call MacPherson,” She seemed resigned to this fact, “Tell him I have what he wants and that I’m ready to meet him.”

Helena centered herself with a breath, drawing on the strength that came with the knowledge that this was all for Myka. She called the last number that MacPherson had contacted her through. It rang three times in her ear, and she was afraid that he wouldn’t answer, or tha the had gotten rid of the last phone, or-

 “That didn’t take so long did it?” MacPherson chuckled into her ear.

“It wasn’t so difficult once I figured out where they were.” HG responded, the man’s voice bringing out her fear and hatred in equal measures it would seem.

“I assume you had some help though, five artifacts all by yourself in three days?” He laughed, “That’s quite alright, HG, I expected you might need the help of your team to complete this task, but HG, this next part you will do alone.”

“What do I have to do?” Helena demanded unflinchingly.

“You are going to get in a car,” he began, dropping his joking tone, “You will drive south on highway 99 until you are pulled over by my agents. They will sedate you and bring you to me.”

“Deal.” Helena agreed without thinking it through.

“Oh and Helena?” James called through the phone, “Don’t forget the artifacts. I’d hate to see what would happen to such a lovely face if you tried to keep them from me.”

Helena hung up on the sound of his laughter and turned to her friends and team mates, “He wants me to drive, alone, down the highway until Sandra and Raymond pick me up.”

“Are you insane?” Pete demanded, “No, no way.”

“Peter,” Helena tired, feeling her sleepless nights catching up with her now.

“No!” he cut her off, “No way I am letting you go in by yourself!”

“We don’t have a choice!” Helena sobbed, and the room fell quiet at the broken sound.

It was Claudia who spoke next, a strange smile on her face, “Maybe we do.”

* * *

It was cutting into her wrists. Blossoming into her shoulders. Spreading through her abdomen. Pounding in her head.

She couldn’t pull in a full breath, her toes trying to reach the ground, even for a centimeter of relief.

Time had ceased to hold any meaning. No windows, or clocks, or light. The only thing she had to keep time was the reverberating sound of her pounding heart and the pair of breaths sharing the thick air. She didn’t try to talk to her fellow prisoner, not since she realized who he was. But she had since given up any pretense of anger she had for him.

He was sick. Just as fucked up as Myka was. And just as much a prisoner here.

He had screamed most of the previous… hours? Days? Weeks?

He had been quiet for a while now, though, and that was worse for Myka. She had thought he died first, leaving her all alone in the cold darkness. That had terrified her, she hadn’t realized how much the presence of another person had been, even if it was the man who tried to kill her.

The sound of footsteps steadily grew louder, and with it Sykes began to whimper and struggle once more.

“Shhh,” Myka struggled to be heard, twisting herself, ignoring the pain, until she was facing the direction she thought he was, “Shh, it’s gonna be okay, it’s gonna be okay.” Her voice was strangled, but it seemed to calm him.

The door to the room in which they were being held opened, letting in a fresh wave of frigid air, causing a violent shutter to pass through Myka’s body and she had to bite back a cry of pain. It was all for naught, as a blast of water burned against Myka’s skin and her sobs were cut off as water tried to force its way into her lungs.

“I’m sorry,” the malicious tone cut from the statement its meaning.

Myka coughed, her body spasming from the force and impossibility to pull in a breath with her arms pulled so taunt above her.  Her teeth began to clatter uncontrollably.

“We’re heading out to go pick up your girlfriend,” Sandra’s words, though not fully understood, caused an immediate and violent reaction in Myka, and she renewed her efforts to pull at the ropes binding her wrists.

“I wanted to make sure you were cleaned up a little before we bring her in,” her laugh chilled Myka further than the air or water could.

“MacPherson has plans for you both.” And with that she sprayed Myka once more for good measure, as well as Sykes, before turning on her heel and walking out, taking the light and worst of the cold air with her.


	34. Malevolent Chaos

Never before had Helena seen the high way so deserted. But she supposed that was the point at two in the morning. She found herself looking into the rear view mirror more often than she ever had before.

Being in the car alone for close to three hours now also afforded her ample time alone with her thoughts. She had been running nonstop for the last three days, hadn’t rally allowed herself to feel the gaping absence in her chest. She didn’t know where her daughter was, or if she was okay. Myka had been kidnapped and was most definitely _not_ okay.

Maybe it was a good thing the roads were so empty, since the lines became so blurred as Helena’s eyes filled with tears and her hands shook the steering wheel. She knew she should probably pull to the side of the road before she caused an accident, but she couldn’t allow herself to slow down in the slightest, not when the promise of getting Myka back was _right_ there, just out of her grasp.

“Get a hold of yourself,” She spoke aloud as she swiped angrily at her eyes.

“ _Everything okay in there?”_ Claudia’s voice spoke through the ear piece.

“Fantastic.” Helena forced her voice to sound light. It was then there was a short burst of blue and red light behind her, “Either I have the highway patrol finally pulling me over for reckless driving, or the agents have arrived.”

“ _Stay calm._ ” Claudia warned as HG pulled off the highway and onto an access road.

The put the car in park and took a breath, keeping her eyes on the scene before her now. The car that pulled her over had its high beams on, blinding HG and making it impossible to see who was walking along the side of her car now.

There was a tapping on her window, and she rolled it down, looking up with a neutral expression.

Raymond smiled down at her, “We’re here to collect you, Miss Wells. Do you mind stepping out of the car?”

HG nodded, doing her best to move normally as she went through the motions of exiting the car, bring sure that she didn’t have to brush up against the agent when he stood far too close to her.

“We’re going to have to search you before we take you in.” Sandra’s voice had Helena noticing the female agent leaned against the rear driver’s side door, “Put your hands against the car please.”

HG did as she was told, still refusing to talk, afraid she would speak through her anger and make everything worse for her, for Myka.

Raymond’s hands moved slowly over her, in a decidedly unprofessional manner as he slowed when moving between her thighs. She tried to bite her lip and take it passively, but she couldn’t take it any longer. She spun on the car and shoved him from her, causing Raymond to trip over himself and land hard on his ass.

“Hey!” he protested.

“I’ll not be groped under the pretenses of a search, _agent._ ” She nearly spat at him.

Sandra rolled her eyes and stepped in. She motioned for HG to resume her position against the car, and reluctantly she complied. Sandra’s hands were less obtrusive on Helena, but not by much. She found the tesla and cell phone first, tossing them into the front seat of Helena’s car.

“Lift your shirt to your bra line and turn,” Her tone was almost bored, but HG hesitated still, “Look, by my clock, your girlfriend has about forty-five more minutes before… well before it’s too late. So swallow your pride and lift your shirt.”

Helena did just that, seeing red for a moment at the mention of her girlfriend’s situation, “What did you do to her?” She demanded as Sandra finished her pat down, thankfully not thinking to check HG’s ear or remove her ever present locket.

“Which time?” Sandra let a cruel smile splay over her lips, “When I let lose a deadly artifact in her parents shop? Or when I gave her would be murderer a ride away from the crime scene? Or maybe you’re referring to all the fun she and I have had over the last three days while you took your sweet time retrieving James’ things.”

Helena tasted blood in her mouth, biting on her cheeks, her lips, her tongue, _anything_ to keep herself from lashing out at the wicked woman taunting her now. Surely she was just doing it to get a rise out of her…

“Where are the artifacts?” Sandra demanded when her jeering didn’t work.

“On the back seat.” She motioned with her head as Raymond moved to enclose her wrists with a zip tie.

The blonde agent retrieved the foil incased curiosities, moving them to the back of their SUV.

Raymond pushed HG from behind, “Come on, girly,” he whispered in her ear and Helena felt her skin crawl as his breath trailed over her neck. He opened the back door for her before “helping” to lift her in.

HG closed her eyes as the agents started them driving again, down the side road HG had pulled off on. She began to conjugate French verbs, praying this trip would be short. She could feel each mile passing beneath her, bringing her ever closer to her reunion with Myka.

Her mental exercises were interrupted by the malicious tone of the female agent once more. “Aren’t you the least bit curious?”

“About what, darling?” HG’s voice was dripping with faux sweetness.

“How about, how I got the journal to Warren?” she offered, clearly anxious, wanting to share her sheer brilliance with _someone_ , “Or why?”

“Please,” HG rolled her eyes, “Do tell me every detail of your master plan.”

Sandra ignored the sarcasm, chomping at the bit and starting her story before HG finished her sentence, “I knew James was worried about finding the pen and the journal, they had become quite illusive, and we couldn’t seem to catch up with both of them.”

“Not surprising,” Helena shrugged, her tone light, “I mean, I _have_ seen you two in the field. Inexperienced college kids could do a better job.”

Sandra went on as if HG hadn’t spoken, “I found the journal, I had it in my hands… the only problem was the pen hadn’t resurfaced in years. I knew you and your _humanitarian_ friends would do anything to find it if someone you loved was in danger. Warren Bering was an easy target. When I brought the book in to sell… he would have given me anything for the book that nearly killed him.” She chuckled, “And I was right. As soon as your precious _Myka_ figured out an artifact was hurting her old man, you and your friends went all out trying to find the other half. I heard that little redheaded friend of yours was almost cut in half. What a shame… it would have been interesting to see how the regents tried to cover _that_ one up.”

“ _What a fracking bitch._ ” Claudia hissed in her ear, clearly offended.

Helena had gone back to conjugating verbs and counting miles. She could tell when they got close because both agents began to relax. That wasn’t good. For their plan to work, HG needed them worked up and easily distracted.

“How long have you and your boss been copulating?” HG asked with no preamble.

“Excuse you?” Sandra demanded while Raymond jerked the wheel, shooting his partner a sideways glance.

“I’m sorry, perhaps I should have worded it differently,” HG thought for a moment, “Have you been fucking MacPherson for long, or is this a recent development?”

Raymond snorted, “Sandra and MacPherson aren’t…” he trailed off when a glance at his partner revealed a deepening blush that spread form her neck and an enraged look plastered on her face, “Oh, God, seriously?” he demanded, but received no reply. He gave a disgusted noise and looked back to the dark road in front of them.

“Tell me, Sandra,” Helena cut in again, leaning forward in her seat some, “I’m curious from a feminists’ stand point, woman to woman, did you decide to go along with this plan because that’s what he wanted? Or are you twisted all on your own and you two sociopaths have just found each other by chance? Oh, oh, _please_ , for the love of all that is good and holy, tell me that _really_ it’s you who is using him and not the other way around.”

There was poisonous silence rolling off Sandra’s tense shoulders and HG knew she needed one final push, “Sandra, Sandra, _Sandra,_ ” she shook her head, “I’m disappointed in you. What happened to being evil for evil’s sake? And letting MacPherson _use_ you like that… is the sex good at least… can he even-,”

“You shut your whore mouth!” Sandra turned in her seat, drawing her pistol and aiming it at HG’s smug grin, “One more word and I will blast that pretty mouth out the back of your goddamn skull!”

“Touchy, touchy,” HG mumbled before letting her sly grin grow wider, “You really think my mouth is pretty?”

Sandra gave a wordless cry of rage and it was only Raymond’s sharp order for his partner to get a hold of herself that stopped shots from being fired.

The last fifteen minutes of the drive were made in an atmosphere teeming with tension. If a match had been lit in the car, HG was sure that it all would have exploded around them.

In the hour between Sandra walking out of the room and the SUV pulling up the rock path, Myka had not been idle. Had she been, she most certainly would have succumb, but her primal instincts had kicked in, her fight reflex snapping into action.

Myka spent the entire hour left alone with renewed energy struggling against the ropes. She knew that if she stopped moving… if she stopped struggling… stopped trying, then she would die. So she twisted, rocked, heaved, left to right, left to right, left to right, left to right, trying to wear the rope against the beam that it was draped around. She tried, through shivering, numb lips to call to Walter, to urge him to do the same as she, but he had long since stopped making any noise, and Myka found herself worried once more.

Her efforts of escape were cut short, unable to know just how close she had been, when she heard the approaching agents, seeming to be in a low argument that Myka could really hear over the sound of her own labored breathing. She willed her body to stop swaying as they drew ever nearer…

Helena caught herself just in time as Sandra yanked her from the back of the SUV, glad that Raymond had restrained her hands in front of her. She was able to save herself from getting more intimately acquainted with the gravel walkway.

Sandra pulled her to her feet by her hair, and HG had to bite back a cry of pain.

“You need to chill, partner,” Raymond barked, moving Sandra away from their prisoner, “Jeeze for someone who’s apparently been having sex this whole time, you sure are up tight.”

“Shut the fuck up!” Sandra spat at him.

“Whoa!” Raymond held his hands up defensively as they pushed HG to move towards the large structure before them , “All I’m saying is that you have been giving me crap for the last three years for playing the field, meanwhile you are letting the boss slip it to you-,”

Sandra’s punch was swift and painful, and Raymond took it.

“Alright,” he nodded, picking himself up off the floor, rubbing his jaw tenderly, “I deserved that. But you and I need to have a chat when this is over.”

“Don’t count on it.” Sandra hissed.

They left HG to look over their surroundings, mostly empty ranch land, like most of this area of California, and the barn they were pushing her towards now seemed to have been long ago abandoned. The paint may once have been red, but now it was a weathered grey in the moon light. What struck HG as the oddest, was the near complete lack of sound surrounding them.

She tried to not make it obvious as she brought her conjoined wrists to her mouth, tugging on the ends of the zip ties binding her, making them impossibly tighter. She thought she had been caught when Raymond nudged her from behind, but he was only trying to get her moving towards the barn once more.

She sent a prayer up to whomever was listening that cold night that the others were close behind, but she didn’t want to risk asking Claudia just _how_ close her back up was. MacPherson thought he had been so clever, sending her driving aimlessly for hours, making sure she wasn’t being followed. Before picking her up thirty minutes from his location.

His one mistake was making an enemy of the team of people far more clever than he could ever hope to be.

Raymond and Sandra marched her right up to the wide door, swinging it open and shoving her inside before flipping the overhead lights on. Helena closed her eyes against the assaulting brightness. She blinked once, twice, looking around as Raymond pulled the barn door shut behind them.

While the outside had made this building appear as if it were one strong windstorm from being rubble, it was clear someone had gone to great lengths to fortify this barn and adapt it to their own purposes.

The cement floors and reinforced steal walls supporting the original structure while protecting it from the elements, making it at least ten degrees warmer inside than in the winter air. The rear of the barn had been divided, cut off from the main floor and turned into rooms or perhaps offices… But none of this caught Helena’s attention.

No, what caught her eye and had her blood boiling was the sight of her love, her Myka Ophelia Bering, strong and fierce and _alive_ , hanging from the rafters in the middle of the large room. Her wrists were bound with rope that was thrown over a beam, her toes inches from the ground. Her hands were bloody and blistered where it’s clear Myka had once made the effort to pull herself up repeatedly to get a breath, to regain blood flow in her hands. Her clothing was dripping, her body almost convulsing in the cold as her lips turned blue. Her Blood shot eyes widened briefly in fear until they settled on HG, and filled with so much relief and joy, it broke the woman staring at her.

“Helena,” Her words were a breathless whisper, and her eyes closed briefly, fighting tears, not wanting to appear any weaker in front of the agents than she already did.

HG’s eyes darted around the rest of the room, searching for _some_ way to help her girlfriend, all thoughts of the carefully constructed plan thrown out the window. HG could see now what Sandra had meant about her not having much time. She was surprised that Myka hadn’t succumbed to hypothermia yet. As the other prisoner appeared to have-

 _Other prisoner_? HG looked to the man she could barely recognize as Walter Sykes hanging a little ways to the left of Myka. His head hanging, body swaying slightly. Part of her gave a mirthless laugh and thought he deserved it. But the rest of her greatly over shadowed it, seeing someone who had obviously been tortured far beyond anything Helena, in all her dark creativity, couldn’t have imagined.

“Dude, what the _fuck_?” Raymond demanded, seeing this room for the first time, dropping his guard.

Helena brought her arms down in one swift motion, her forearms hitting her hips and causing her bindings to snap. She spun, in one quick motion landing a hit to Raymond’s gut, sweeping her leg around him and causing his forward momentum to bring his face into contact his her awaiting fist. Sandra had done him a favor in dislocating his jaw earlier, now HG’s hit broke it completely as well as rendered him unconscious.

She turned to Sandra now, still mostly in shock at the sudden turn of events, but having enough presence of mind to raise her weapon, which HG promptly relieved her of. Sandra cried out in pain, griping her now fractured wrist, but Helena silenced her with a knee to the stomach, followed by a hit to the ribs. And when Sandra was finally on the floor, her face was met with the heel of Helena’s boot, and she was out like a light.

“What the fuck in deed.” Helena growled down at the two unconscious agents.

There was a slow clapping from behind her, and HG swung around, gun raised and finger resting beside the trigger. Her breathing was labored as she watched MacPherson approach, the door of the room he had been waiting in closing softly behind him.

“That was rather impressive, I must admit,” he smiled, “I _knew_ I should have worked harder to recruit you.”

“Into your crazy plan?” Helena gave a short humorless laugh, “And been like Sandra here? No thanks. Besides, you’re not my type, darling.”

“Alright, no need to be spiteful, Helena,” James shook his head, “You’ve brought my artifacts, as promised, and now you can leave with your girlfriend, as promised. I’ve even saved dear Mr. Sykes here for you to do with as you please.”

“No, I think I’d rather just kill you, James,” Helena fixed her sights on him, thumbing the safety.

“Ah, ah, ah,” MacPherson gave a cruel smile as he pulled a thin rod shaped object from under his arm, “Not so fast, my dear.” He gave it a twist and pain erupted in Helena.

It had no focal point, no place of origin. Her entire body was cloaked with pain and it took all her strength to bite back the scream that clawed its way up her throat. She tried to stay focused on MacPherson, to fix her wavering aim, but she didn’t seem to have control over her body.

“Now, now, haven’t you ever been told that guns are dangerous?” James smiled sweetly before twisting the rod in his hands once more, “Lets point that elsewhere, shall we?”

More pain wracked HG’s body, and she found it twisting of its own accord, the only thing lessening her agony. But she found herself crying out in protest when the barrel was pointed at Myka instead.

“No! What are you doing? Stop!” the aching worsened every moment that HG worked to fight it, only managing to move the aim of the gun from Myka’s head to her stomach.

“Cecil B. DeMille's Riding Crop...” he stroked the thing before giving it another twist, and Helena’s aim rose to Myka’s heaving chest, “Look at that. Lets my mind control your body. It's pretty damn cold, don't you think?”

Staring into Myka’s eyes was the only thing that allowed HG to think outside of the pain as she worked to move her aim inches to the left, aiming just at her shoulder now. Beads of sweat poured down HG’s face despite the freezing temperature. Myka’s green eyes were clouded with pain as she watched HG fight, and the Brit’s heart twisted when she realized that it wasn’t Myka’s _own_ pain causing her to flinch, it was Helena’s.

“Fighting it will only make it worse.” James spoke as if Helena was a petulant child who didn’t understand the way things worked, and he turned the riding crop once more with a cackle, fixing Helena’s aim where he wanted it.

“I have been thinking,” he spoke over Helena’s curses and sounds of struggled, “What would be the best punishment for you? Killing Myka surely, but what’s even worse than taking her from you? Then it hit me, making you kill her.”

“No,” Helena sobbed, fighting back tears and gritting her teeth until they creaked in her mouth.

“Right, you are far too _right_ my dear,” He nodded, “Then I would have to look over my shoulder for all of eternity, waiting for you to seek your revenge. And you have had some dark fantasies, I hear, and those were only about our dear Mr. Sykes, who merely shot your beloved. No, I couldn’t have _that_ hanging over my head.”

He wrung the artifact in his hands, and Helena’s arm twisted once more, only now the cold barrel of the gun was placed forcefully beneath her own chin. It was Myka’s turn to cry out in protest as she struggled uselessly against her ropes. She wished more than anything she could be as badass as her girlfriend had been for one moment and break free of her ropes, but she could barely keep her oxygen deprived brain focused on what was happening.

“See, here’s the lovely plan I’ve landed on, clean up all my messes, tie off all my loose ends.” He chuckled, “I kill you, or more accurately, I force you to kill yourself in your girlfriend’s place.” It was then that Helena realized the pain had stopped, because she had stopped fighting it, now that the threat was no longer on Myka.

“She might fight for a little while, but I hear she has a few screws loose up top,” MacPherson clucked his tongue, “It’s only a matter of time before the guilt and depression get to her and… well…”

Helena could see it, God, she didn’t want to, but she could. Myka from last year wouldn’t have ever dreamt of killing herself, but this Myka… so afflicted by those damned dog tags… this wasn’t clear thinking, level headed Myka. HG knew that Myka’s motivation for her own recovery was being there for Helena and Christina. And with Helena gone…

“Why?” Helena demanded, looking for anyway to stall, to put this off until the backup she should have waited for arrived, “Why did you do all of this, MacPherson? Why release artifacts back out into the world when you worked so hard to collect them.”

“ _I_ didn’t work to collect them!” James corrected her angrily, “That was Arthur and Vanessa and Hugo. _I_ tried to convince the regents that the artifacts were tools, meant to be used! They wouldn’t hear me. This was how I could make them listen.” He shrugged, giving a smug smile, “It was also quite the little enterprise. Sell the artifacts, steal them back… all the while, the rise in artifact disturbances helped me to convince some of the regents to let us use artifacts in the field. It was only a matter of time before I convinced them to my plan completely.”

James face twisted with hatred, “Until you and your meddling friends came along and ruined my plan. No matter, I had no qualms killing Rebecca and Jack, and I actually kind of liked them. You? I loath you. I’ve no pity at all.” He moved to twist the cop once more.

A loud snap and a cry of pure fury distracted him for just enough time so Helena could duck her head to the side as the gun went off. There was a loud ringing in her left ear and she tried to understand what just happened.

She tried to shake off the discombobulating effects as she squinted at the scene before her now. Where Myka had been before, hung now only open space. And where MacPherson stood, two bodies struggled for dominance.

It was an outmatched fight with one of the competitors bound, starved and in the early stages of hypothermia. It was only a matter of seconds before MacPherson was back on his feet, standing over Myka. The riding crop was no longer in his hands, having been knocked free when he was tackled by the near crazed woman, but he found a substitute weapon in the form of an old two by four.

Helena didn’t allow herself time to think. She took a breath and lifted the gun in one motion, and fired. Her aim was true, but it still took James a moment to react.

The explosion of the gun echoed through the now eerily silent barn, and MacPherson stood for a moment, a confused look on his face. Myka watched as he realized with growing horror that he had been the target. And the blood spread over his chest quickly as he fell to the ground on his knees, the length of lumber falling with a clang beside him. The rest of him crumpled to the ground, his mouth opening and closing, trying to pull in a breath with his now irreparably damaged lungs.

HG dropped her gun in disgust and rushed to Myka, pulling her up into her arms, dragging her back from the slowly dying body of James MacPherson. He spasamed once, his throat gurgling, before he moved no more.

Helena collapsed gratefully to the ground, she pulled at the rope restraints until they fell away and there was nothing left stopping her from pulling the freezing form of her girlfriend tightly to her chest. She opened her coat and Myka wrapped her arms around her, seeking warmth and comfort as she shook uncontrollably.

“I-I l-l-love y-y-y-you.” Myka mumbled as she buried her face into Helena’s shoulders. She had been afraid she would never get to utter those words to her ever again.

HG fought to not pull away from the icy skin that met hers, working instead to hold Myka closer, tighter, “I love you too, darling.” She needed to get her to some place warm and safe.

Helena still couldn’t hear out of her right ear, she couldn’t hear Claudia shouting for her to please say something, to tell her that everything was all right. She could hear the update that the others were trying to get into the barn now.

The barn door burst open, getting caught for a brief moment on the still unconscious bodies of the agents. Pete and Steve came stumbling through first, looking down in shock at Sandra and Raymond before glancing over to Myka and Helena, huddled in the middle of the barn next to a hanging body and an unmoving body.

Artie, right behind them, was the first to recover as he recognized his former partner and friend laying on the floor. He rushed to him, already feeling the denial rising in his throat. He fell to his knees, pulling James to his chest, but he was too late. James MacPherson was dead. And even though part of Arthur Nielson knew that there was no other way this was going to end with the two woman behind him alive, he still mourned for his loss.

Steve worked on putting cuffs on the stirring agents while Pete and Dr. Calder rushed to Helena’s side.

“You’re alright,” Pete collapsed next to them, “Mykes, you’re alright. She is alright, right?” He looked to Helena, who was mostly unresponsive, before turning to the doctor.

“I need to look at her more closely…” she began.

“N-n-no!” Myka cried out, putting force behind her words, “G-g-go ch-ch-check Wa-w-walter.” She motioned with her chin to the man hanging next to him. “Hel-help him f-f-first. Get. Him. Down.”

“Myka,” the doctor tried, looking behind her shoulder at the wanted fugitive, not thinking there was really a point to saving him now, she didn’t even believe he was still alive.

“He-he-he’s been here lo-lo-longer.” She insisted stubbornly.

Pete and Helena exchanged a look, “Myka he tried to kill you.” Pete explained in a low tone.”

“N-n-not hi-his fa-fault.” She shook her head, “P-p-please.”

“How about I take her to the car and get her warmed up,” HG suggested, also believing Sykes to be dead, and not wanting her fragile girlfriend to be there when that discovery was made.

“Oh alright,” Vanessa caved, “Pete, help me get Walter down.”

Helena was glad she didn’t have to watch either, feeling sick about all the things she had imagined doing to him once she caught him. She stumbled under Myka’s weight for a moment, remembering the first time she had to hold Myka up as they flew above a car that tried to run her down. HG held on to that happy moment as she carried Myka outside to the idled SUV driven in by Pete.

They sat huddled together in the back seat, Myka drifting in and out of consciousness as Helena hummed a song to her, placing kisses to where ever she could reach between verses, glad that Myka could see the tears that flowed so freely down her face now.

Finally, _finally_ , they were safe, and she could hold Myka and tell her that she loved her, and keep her safe from everything that always seemed to be moving against them.

“I love you.” Helena sighed into Myka’s damp and knotted hair.

“I love you, too.” Myka murmured sleepily.

HG was shocked to see what she did next. Pete and Steve working together, carrying Walter Sykes, wrapped tightly in a blanket, but apparently alive. Vanessa and Artie followed close behind them, Arthur with red rimmed eyes, pushing the two cuffed and dazed agents to the other SUV.

Pete and Steve lay Walter on the back seat before ushering Raymond and Sandra to the third row, fixing their cuffs to the handles above their heads. They then went back into the barn a second time while Vanessa got settled into the driver’s seat of that SUV and Artie in the passenger side. The two boys reappeared with a vaguely human shaped wrapped bundle that they placed in the cargo area of the same car.

They closed it up and stood there for a moment, watching the doctor drive away before turning and getting into their own vehicle.

They all sat in silence for a moment, allowing their breath to fog up the windows with words unsaid.

“What now?” Myka asked softly.

“Now we go home.” Pete declared as he put the car in drive.

“Or perhaps, we could stop by the hospital first?” HG interjected worriedly.

“No, I hate hospitals.” Myka complained.

“I know, my love.” Helena assured her, “But I will go sick with worry until I know that you will be alright.”

“I am alright.” Myka argued weakly.

“I just want to be sure that I will have you to worry over for the rest of my life.” Helena sighed as she placed another kiss on the top of Myka’s head.

She felt the other woman sigh and finally give in. It was only then that, for the first time in four days, with Myka safely secured to her chest, that Helena allowed herself a moment’s rest. To close her eyes and feel the knot of worry loosen in her chest.

She was safe. Her heart was safe.


	35. Endless Wonder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter of Library of Crazy. I’m sorry that this update took as long as it did, endings were always the hardest part for me in writing, and I rewrote this chapter three times. More authors notes at the end.

 

“Wake up!” _The little voice urged._

_Myka’s head snapped up, searching her surroundings with an edge of desperation, but all she could see was darkness, all she could feel was the pain of the abrasive ropes cutting into her wrists, all she could hear was the rasping of her own breathing echoed weakly by Walter Sykes._

_She found herself calming slightly, despite the grim outlook, comforted by the fact that there was no possible way she heard-_

“Mom, wake up!” _the voice insisted once more._

_“Christina?” a wave of fear washed through Myka’s body. She couldn’t be here, there was no way… MacPherson said he would leave her out of it!_

_Myka jerked against the ropes suspending her in the middle of the barn, but it was no use, she couldn’t move. She felt herself being pinned against some weight. Panic increased._

“Mom, come on,” Christina whined, “Mummy says we can’t start until you wake up.”

Myka’s eyes slowly opened, becoming aware of reality a centimeter at a time. Her vision was blurry, and her thoughts were still groggy from the nightmare, but this definitely did not look like MacPherson’s barn, it looked like her bedroom.

She realized, quite suddenly, that she was at home, in bed, and Christina was straddling her, trying to get her to wake up, and excited grin on her face. Her curls were wild, her eyes bright, still dressed in the pajamas she had picked out for herself the night before.

Myka breathed in relief as her heart returned to normal speeds. She wasn’t still in that barn, and more importantly, Christina never was.

“Hey,” Myka croaked as the pain finally made itself known.

Christina’s weight was pressing down on her, making it worse, but Myka couldn’t find it in herself to move the little girl away.

“It’s Christmas, Mom, come on!” she bounced excitedly, and this time, Myka couldn’t hide the wince it caused.

“Christina, darling,” Helena chastised from where she appeared in the door way, “I didn’t mean that you should come wake her.”

HG lifted her daughter off Myka and set her standing on the floor, “Go finish your breakfast with the others,” She gave her a gentle shove on the shoulder, “We’ll be out in a minute.”

The four year old gave a dramatic sigh before skipping out of the room. Helena lowered herself carefully to the mattress.

She had a look of concern on her face as she brushed Myka’s curls away from her face, “Are you alright, love?”

Myka took a shallow breath willing the worst of the pain to subside.

She left the barn with severe dehydration, hypothermia, three broken ribs, a fractured cheek bone, a dislocated wrist and shoulder on her left side, and a mild infection. That wasn’t including the mental scars that had been added to her growing collection.

Those she was handling far better than her physical pain, for once. It helped that MacPherson was dead, Sandra and Raymond were in some super-secret government prison, and Walter Sykes was in a medically induced coma. For once, there was no need to look over her shoulder every moment. And Dr. Cho was working with her every day now to make sure that her mind recovered as well as her body.

Myka was an awful patient for the day she spent in the hospital, and every day over the next three weeks for Helena. She didn’t like having to take it easy, she was used to doing things for herself, but her injuries hindered her, though she was determined to be back to her normal self as soon as possible.

So she never told Helena when she was in pain, she never took the pain medicine prescribed to her, she studied and she passed her finals and she went to work and played with Christina and basically did everything as she normally would. As much as was possible for her.

She smiled up at her girlfriend, realizing there was a question that needed answering, “I’m fantastic now that you’re here.”

“Why Miss Bering,” HG smiled as she leant her face closer to Myka’s, “Flattery will get you everywhere.”

It was meant to be a brief, good morning kiss, but Myka wasn’t having any of that. She wrapped her arms around Helena and rolled, throwing her to her back and pressing deeper kisses down on her. After a moment’s indulgence, HG pulled back, as much as the bed would allow, to catch her breath, and Myka only trailed kisses down her jaw and neck.

“Myka, darling,” Helena was trying to keep her thoughts from clouding over with the desire the rest of her body was feeling, she swallowed thickly, “Not that I’m not thoroughly enjoying myself, but I don’t think now’s the best time…”

“And why’s that?” Myka challenged as her teeth grazed along Helena’s collar bone.

“Because,” her back arched slightly, and her hands gripped Myka’s hips tighter, but she screwed her eyes shut and searched for the reason that this needed to stop, “Because there is an impatient child waiting for us in the next room, and Pete can only be stalled by Christina for so long before he starts opening presents without us.”

Myka groaned before kissing Helena’s lips once more. At first it was full of need and desire, and slowly cooled until it was just a chaste peck on the lips, and Myka rolled off, biting back a grunt of pain.

Her timing was perfect, as the door to their bedroom opened once more, this time, it was Claudia, reaching one hand out blindly while the other one was clamped over her eyes, “Is it safe to enter? If I peak, will I be scarred for life… again?”

HG chuckled, “You shan’t be blinded, though I think you were being a bit dramatic about it last time. It’s perfectly natural for a couple, such as Myka and myself, to have a healthy sexual appetite-,”

“ _Stop_ talking,” Claudia plead, throwing both hands out as if to physically stop HG’s words, allowing herself to peak out of one eye to make sure both women were fully clothed, “For the love of God, HG, _stop._ I love you both, but there _is_ such a thing as too much information.”

HG simply smirked as she rose from the bed, straightening her shirt and running a hand through her hair. Myka slowly rolled off the bed so she wouldn’t have to bend as much at the waist, HG was quick to help her to her feet. She was rewarded with another, innocent kiss.

Claudia made a fake gagging noise, “Seriously? You’re worse than teenagers.”

Myka and HG smiled at one another, conveying more love in that single glance than a thousand words ever could.

They followed their friend to the living room of their apartment, where the rest of their surrogate family was waiting for them. The smell of coffee and bacon was drawing Myka to the kitchen, but as soon as Christina saw that her mom’s girlfriend was awake and up, she jumped to her feet and ran to her.

Christina grabbed Myka’s hands and practically dragged her to the love seat, sitting her and her mother there before calling everyone to the living room, though they were all already pretty much there.

Myka understood her excitement though, so she indulged her with a smile. This was the first Christmas Christina was spending with her mother in the last three years. This was the first real Christmas that Myka was having since she left her parent’s house, her first ever with Helena.

She looked around at her small, mismatched family.

Claudia, who had been the one to put up all the decorations. She hadn’t had a Christmas since she was eight, foster homes were always depressing during the holidays, so she went all out on the tree that barely fit in the apartment, the lights that were bright and the ornaments that were just shy of gaudy. She sat on the floor with a mug of coco, her back to the couch where Steve sat.

He had a big smile and a floppy red Santa hat, clearly indulging Claudia’s mania with the holiday with good grace. Steve would never admit that he loved Christmas almost as much as Claudia did. It wasn’t the presents or the coco or the decoration. It was the smell of pine tree that clung to everything, and the feeling of belonging somewhere, at last.

Pete was on his knees at the tree, passing out the presents and secretly trying to guess what was in each colorfully wrapped package. He celebrated when he was right and gave a confused tilt of his head when he was wrong. He accused Myka of purposely wrapping her presents weird so that he couldn’t guess correctly.

Amanda was smiling and trying to keep her childish boyfriend focused from where she sat beside Steve. She had elected not to go home for the holiday, feeling like she fit in better with this tightly knit group then she ever did with her “real” family. She was needlessly worried about being accepted by her boyfriend’s friends, and also about how he would react when she told him she was considering leaving Fresno and transferring to Fairview. But she knew that discussion could wait.

Then there was Helena. She was used to large parties on Christmas, her parent’s home in London full to the rafters with people she didn’t know who always asked her too many questions she didn’t care about. She had never felt lonelier than when at those parties. Here, in the warm embrace of her girlfriend, surrounded by the people who had become less like friends and more like family, seeing her daughter’s eyes light up with each gift unwrapped… _here_ , is where she felt happy and safe and loved, and Christmas finally seemed to mean something.

True to her nature, Myka enjoyed watching everyone else open their gifts, and blushed deeply when she opened any of hers. She had saved the best for last, so she thought, when she pulled a rectangular box from behind her seat and handed it to Helena, waiting for everyone to be distracted so she could have her girlfriend’s reaction all to herself.

“What’s this?” Helena smiled as she accepted the silver wrapped present, the familiar weight and shape of a book in her hands, “You’ve managed to find a book that we don’t both already own?” she quirked an eyebrow.

Myka lifted one of her shoulders and briefly looked down at her lap, “I may have stumble on something a while ago, and I thought… oh, just open it.” Myka urged.

This piqued HG’s interest, and her curiosity won out over watching Myka’s reactions. She carefully peeled away the paper, sliding out the text and staring at it for a moment, just staring at it. She ran her hand over the worn cover, the gold embossing on the spine. She pulled back the cover and found the scrawling signature of H.G. Wells.

“ _When the Sleeper Wakes_ ,” she whispered, almost reverently, “This is my favorite…”

“I know.” Myka smiled, almost smugly.

“It’s a first edition,” HG pointed out, “A _signed_ first edition, where did you...”

“Over the summer, working in my father’s shop, I stumbled on it.” Myka played with the fringe of her warn pajama bottoms, “I remembered it was your favorite and set it aside to give to you one day.”

Helena’s heart swelled at the thought that, even while Myka was rightfully mad at her, she cared enough to set aside a book that reminded her of Helena. She quickly put her hand on the back of Myka’s neck and pulled her in for a kiss before anyone could see the tears filling her eyes.

Myka smiled as they pulled apart, wiping her thumb across HG’s cheek, catching the single tear that had escaped. They were lost for a single moment that lasted an eternity in each other’s eyes, filled with love and an unbridled joy that they had made it _here_ , despite everything that worked to keep them apart including their own stubbornness. They had made it.

They all spent the day together, drinking hot coco and watching Christmas movies. Laughing and playing games. Eating and telling stories. They spent the day happy. Happier than they had all been in a really long time.

They all believed that this feeling would last from here on out, or at least vehemently hoped that it would. And it did, for six whole days, they believed that they couldn’t finally move past everything and live their lives like normal college kids.

That’s when there was a knock at Myka’s apartment door.

It was January first of the new year, ten am, and it was a miracle that Myka was even awake. They had spent the previous night celebrating with their friends, Christina spending the night at Nate and Emily’s so the other adults could let loose.

She hadn’t gone to bed until five in the morning, but her body woke her up to go through detox. It had been too long since Myka had anything to drink, and her tolerance had lowered. She was leaning on her elbows against the counter, listening to the coffee brew and waiting for the six aspirin she took to take effect.

She was trying to figure out how she ended up with a busted lip and a bruised cheek when they knocked.

Myka was still weary of answering the front door, but it was a hurdle that she and Abigale talked about overcoming, and Myka made a resolution that year to not allow past experiences to hinder living her life. So after downing her glass of water, she walked to the door, resisting the urge to put the security chain on, and pulled it open.

The was met with two men who’s suits were blacker than Myka thought possible, and both were wearing sunglasses despite the cloudy day. The tall bald man stayed stoically quiet, while the shorter, darker man spoke, “Are you Myka Bering?”

“Can I help you?” She asked, adrenalin spiking in her, over shadowing her hang over migraine.

“That depends,” he grumbled, “Are you, or are you not, Myka Being?”

“Yes, I’m Myka,” She agreed finally, reaching her hand for the end table hidden by the door, the top drawer now containing a tesla, “What’s this about?”

“We’ve been sent by Mrs. Fredric to collect you.” He stepped forward.

“You’re kidding me, right?” Myka stepped back, closing the door some to stop the man’s advances.

“Ma’am, this is Warehouse business, and you really need to come with us.” He insisted once more.

“I’m not going anywhere with you until you tell me what’s going on.” She crossed her arms.

“Why is there yelling?” a British voice complained groggily behind her as Helena padded barefoot through the apartment her head in her hands.

“Are you Helena Wells?” The bald man finally spoke, and HG’s head snapped up.

“Who are you?” she demanded, moving to take up a stance similar to Myka’s beside her.

“We were sent by Mrs. Fredric to collect you, your girlfriend, one Claudia Donovan, Steven Jinks, and Peter Lattimer.” He answered curtly, glancing down at his watch, “And we’re already running late, so if you could please come with us.”

“We can’t just go with you,” Helena shook her head.

“I’m afraid you don’t really have a choice, Miss Wells,” He looked over his shoulder at the apartment directly across from them.

His partner pulled something from his pocket, and as he opened his hand, there was a brief flash. Myka and HG both tried to close their eyes, to turn their faces away from it, but it was too late, and everything went dark.

* * *

Myka was violently jerked back to reality when the bus she was sitting in went over a bump and her head hit the window it had been resting on.

“What the,” she rubbed her head with her hand as she looked around. She appeared to be sitting in an old school bus. She had a gnawing feeling that a lot of time had passed since she had last been aware, and she was no longer in her pajamas, but dressed warmly in jeans, boots and a tick jacket.

A glance out the fogged up window reviled a barren, snow covered landscape.

“Were not in California anymore,” she heard a familiar grumble from a few seats in front of her as someone else also came too and glanced outside.

Myka rose on unsure legs, her balance off do to being inside a still moving vehicle. She was sitting in the car back of the bus, three rows in front of her a familiar head of red hair was glancing this way and that.

“Claudia?” Myka called out.

The techie sprung to her feet and turned to face the sound of Myka’s voice, “Mykes! Where are we?”

“I don’t know, I just woke up, I think…” She looked to the other rows, finding Pete’s slumped form first as it was in the row across from hers. Then Steve’s blond head stirring beside raven black hair.

In the front of the bus sat two more people she didn’t recognize right away, at least not from the back. But she would save that discovery for later as she walked down the aisle, using the seats for support, until she got to where Steve and Helena sat.

“Helena,” Myka knelt beside her, “Sweetie, wake up.” She brushed hair from HG’s face.

She made a protesting groan, “Five more minutes…”

“No, come on, Helena, it’s time to wake up,” Myka urged.

Steve was glancing around, panic growing as he took in the unfamiliar settings, and his furtive movements are what finally drug HG from whatever induced sleep they had been in. Her eyes snapped open, full of fear and confusion until they settled on Myka, and she visibly calmed.

“Where are we?” she questioned, “What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Claudia answered for her, “But we’re slowing down.”

“Claud, wake up Pete.” Myka ordered calmly before turning to the other two passengers in the bus, sparing a quick glance for the suited bus driver staring intently out the windshield of the bus and not paying them any mind.

It was coming back to them all what had happened what felt like only moments before. The mysterious men in black, sent from an even more mysterious Mrs. Fredric from the supremely mysterious Warehouse…

Myka thought she would be more afraid, perhaps panicked like the others seemed to be, but she surprised herself by staying calm as she moved up two more rows. What did shock her was to find Abigale and Leena asleep in consecutive rows.

She walked past them without bothering to rouse them, going to stand instead behind the driver’s seat.

“Where are we?” she demanded.

“South Dakota,” The driver responded without looking away from the field they were driving to,   
“We’re almost there, don’t worry.”

“Almost where?” Myka asked, seeing nothing but hills and snow for miles in either direction, but the driver seemed to be done talking to Myka, so she brought the others together in the middle of the bus after waking Leena and Abigale.

“What the bloody hell is in South Dakota?” HG made a face as she glanced worriedly out the window.

“Nothing but snow apparently,” Claudia grumbled.

“No, wait, what’s that?” Steve pointed at the mountain they were driving towards, more specifically at the black shape at the base of the mountain, steadily growing bigger.

“I’m assuming that’s the Warehouse,” Myka paced the aisle, “That’s what they grabbed us for, right? Mrs. Fredric sent them for us. I mean, how long were they really going to let a bunch of college kids who knew about them run around.”

“Why would they put the secret government agency in the middle of South Dakota?” Pete huffed.

“Maybe that’s exactly the point,” Abigale shrugged, “Who would actually think to look here?”

The last five minutes of the trip was made in tense silence, and when the driver told them to exit the bus, they did it stoically. Showing no emotion, though each was feeling a great amount of fear build up in their chest. This is the moment they had been waiting for since they discovered the curiosities. This is why they stopped hunting them. Because they knew eventually, these agents would catch up to them.

They left the bus in a straight line, stopping to stand side by side in front of the large structure before them. They stared up at it, it’s sheer size over whelming. They were so caught up, they failed to notice the figures waiting for them.

“It’s a bit cold out here,” Vanessa finally called to the young adults, “So if you’re all done staring?”

Vanessa Calder, Arthur Neilson, Jane Lattimer and Irene Fredric stood with their backs to the building.

“Would you mind explaining to me,” Myka spoke first, anger tainting her words, “Why you’ve kidnapped us? After all we’ve been through, what made you think that was a good idea?” she demanded, her hands balling into fists at her side.

“We needed to speak to you all,” Jane said, “To get you all here. We’re sorry, but this was the fastest way.”

“Where’s my daughter?” HG demanded next, her eyes flashing dangerously.

“Don’t worry, she’s safe,” Vanessa assured her, “She’s still with Nate.”

“And Amanda?” Pete called, “Where’s my girlfriend?”

“Amanda wasn’t involved with you. She wasn’t part of your, what was it you called them? Scooby Doos?” Mrs. Fredric quirked an eyebrow at Claudia.

“Neither were Leena or Dr. Cho.” Myka argued.

“We need them for… a different reason.” She answered cryptically, “And unless you all want to freeze out here, I suggest you follow me.”

A door that seemed too small for a building so massive swung open behind them, and the four Warehouse personnel walked through. The seven shanghaied people left behind exchanged a look of pure skepticism. Pete was the first to move for the door, followed closely by Myka.

It was a long corridor, lined with tubes, each with the word _EXPLOSIVES_ printed on the side in bold lettering.

“What the hell?” Pete whispered to his best friend as he reached out a tentative hand for one of the tubes.

“Don’t touch the bombs!” Artie snapped without turning around to look at them.

“ _Bombs?”_ Pete mouthed to Myka as he pulled his hand back, and she shrugged in response.

Helena grabbed Myka’s hand, wanting the silent support she knew she would find in the green eyes of her girlfriend. They all stayed huddled pretty close together, figuring there was safety in numbers.

The hallway lead to an office, or what Myka assumed was once an office. It looked as if a tornado had blown through.

In response to whatever expression was on her face, Vanessa said, “We’re doing a bit of… house cleaning.”

She didn’t explain herself, and the other three didn’t stop walking until they reached yet another door, this one leading to a metal catwalk.

“Whoa,” Pete’s jaw dropped as he gripped the railing, staring at the scene before him now.

“Oh my god.” Myka whispered as she moved to stand next to him.

One by one they each had their reactions staring at the shelves below them. Massive shelves, stretching out endlessly in every direction, filling with items too far away to easily identify, but Steve caught sight of what looked like a pyramid off in the distance.

“What is this place?” Leena asked reverently, feeling all the different energies wrapping around her. For once, everyone around her was feeling almost the same thing as she was, like the atmosphere was warm and welcoming. Like they were coming home.

“Welcome to Warehouse 13,” Artie waved with great grandeur towards the Warehouse floor.

“Why are we here?” Myka asked, turning to Mrs. Fredric, knowing she was the one in charge here, “Are we in some kind of trouble for… well, for the last year?”

“No,” she shook her head, “Your actions over the course of the previous ten months have shown us something. That you five,” she pointed to the college students, “Show more promise than anyone we’ve come across. Both as individuals, and as a team.”

“So, what?” Myka laughed, more from confusion and disbelief than actual humor, “You kidnapped us, drugged us, and brought us to The Middle of Nowhere South Dakota to offer us a job?” she looked at the woman like she was insane.

“More than a job,” Mrs. Fredric gave a small smile, “I’m here to offer you all an invitation to a world of endless wonder.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final Chapter for Library of Crazy, the second part of America’s Most Dangerous Antiques Roadshow. I want to thank you for sticking it out with me for the last 120,000 words, thank you so much for your reviews and patience because god knows I need it. You have all been fantastic.
> 
> I am thinking of adding a third part, I have some outlines for it but no major story arc. That’s why I gave this one a kind-of ending. Because even if I do end up publishing America’s Junk Drawer, it’ll be in a few weeks so I can work on the promised 2120 fic. But if it’s something you want to see, let me know and I’ll see if I can step it up and work on two stories at once. No promises.
> 
> I love you all, you beautiful amazing individuals.
> 
> -W


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